"There are no others," answered Hillalum. "Can they push it from the other side?"
"They cannot hear us." Ahuni pounded the granite with a hammer, making not a sound against the din of the water.
Hillalum looked around the tiny room, only now noticing that an Egyptian floated facedown in the water.
"He died falling down the stairs," yelled Damqiya.
"Is there nothing we can do?"
Ahuni looked upward. "Yahweh, spare us."
The three of them stood in the rising water, praying desperately, but Hillalum knew it was in vain: his fate had come at last. Yahweh had not asked men to build the tower or to pierce the vault; the decision to build it belonged to men alone, and they would die in this endeavor just as they did in any of their earthbound tasks. Their righteousness could not save them from the consequences of their deeds.
The water reached their chests. "Let us ascend," shouted Hillalum.
They climbed the tunnel laboriously, against the onrush, as the water rose behind their heels. The few torches illuminating the tunnel had been extinguished, so they ascended in the dark, murmuring prayers that they couldn"t hear. The wooden steps at the top of the tunnel had dislodged from their place, and were jammed farther down in the tunnel. They climbed past them, until they reached the smooth stone slope, and there they waited for the water to carry them higher.
They waited without words, their prayers exhausted. Hillalum imagined that he stood in the black gullet of Yahweh, as the mighty one drank deep of the waters of heaven, ready to swallow the sinners.
The water rose, and bore them up, until Hillalum could reach up with his hands and touch the ceiling. The giant fissure from which the waters gushed forth was right next to him. Only a tiny pocket of air remained. Hillalum shouted, "When this chamber is filled, we can swim heavenward."
He could not tell if they heard him. He gulped his last breath as the water reached the ceiling, and swam up into the fissure. He would die closer to heaven than any man ever had before.
The fissure extended for many cubits. As soon as Hillalum pa.s.sed through, the stone stratum slipped from his fingers, and his flailing limbs touched nothing. For a moment he felt a current carrying him, but then he was no longer sure. With only blackness around him, he once again felt that horrible vertigo that he had experienced when first approaching the vault: he could not distinguish any directions, not even up or down. He pushed and kicked against the water, but did not know if he moved.
Helpless, he was perhaps floating in still water, perhaps swept furiously by a current; all he felt was numbing cold. Never did he see any light. Was there no surface to this reservoir that he might rise to?
Then he was slammed into stone again. His hands felt a fissure in the surface. Was he back where he had begun? He was being forced into it, and he had no strength to resist. He was drawn into the tunnel, and was rattled against its sides. It was incredibly deep, like the longest mine shaft: he felt as if his lungs would burst, but there was still no end to the pa.s.sage. Finally his breath would not be held any longer, and it escaped from his lips. He was drowning, and the blackness around him entered his lungs.
But suddenly the walls opened out away from him. He was being carried along by a rushing stream of water; he felt air above the water! And then he felt no more.
Hillalum awoke with his face pressed against wet stone. He could see nothing, but he could feel water near his hands. He rolled over and groaned; his every limb ached, he was naked and much of his skin was sc.r.a.ped raw or wrinkled from wetness, but he breathed air.
Time pa.s.sed, and finally he could stand. Water flowed rapidly about his ankles. Stepping in one direction, the water deepened. In the other, there was dry stone; shale, by the feel of it.
It was utterly dark, like a mine without torches. With torn fingertips he felt his way along the floor, until it rose up and became a wall. Slowly, like some blind creature, he crawled back and forth. He found the water"s source, a large opening in the floor. He remembered! He had been spewed up from the reservoir through this hole. He continued crawling for what seemed to be hours; if he was in a cavern, it was immense.
He found a place where the floor rose in a slope. Was there a pa.s.sage leading upward? Perhaps it could still take him to heaven.
Hillalum crawled, having no idea of how much time pa.s.sed, not caring that he would never be able to retrace his steps, for he could not return whence he had come. He followed upward tunnels when he found them, downward ones when he had to. Though earlier he had swallowed more water than he would have thought possible, he began to feel thirst, and hunger.
And eventually he saw light, and raced to the outside.
The light made his eyes squeeze closed, and he fell to his knees, his fists clenched before his face. Was it the radiance of Yahweh? Could his eyes bear to see it? Minutes later he could open them, and he saw desert. He had emerged from a cave in the foothills of some mountains, and rocks and sand stretched to the horizon.
Was heaven just like the earth? Did Yahweh dwell in a place such as this? Or was this merely another realm within Yahweh"s Creation, another earth above his own, while Yahweh dwelled still higher?
A sun lay near the mountaintops behind his back. Was it rising or falling? Were there days and nights here?
Hillalum squinted at the sandy landscape. A line moved along the horizon. Was it a caravan?
He ran to it, shouting with his parched throat until his need for breath stopped him. A figure at the end of the caravan saw him, and brought the entire line to a stop. Hillalum kept running.
The one who had seen him seemed to be man, not spirit, and was dressed like a desert-crosser. He had a waterskin ready. Hillalum drank as best he could, panting for breath.
Finally he returned it to the man, and gasped, "Where is this place?"
"Were you attacked by bandits? We are headed to Erech."
Hillalum stared. "You would deceive me!" he shouted. The man drew back, and watched him as if he were mad from the sun. Hillalum saw another man in the caravan walking over to investigate. "Erech is in Shinar!"
"Yes it is. Were you not traveling to Shinar?" The other man stood ready with his staff.
"I came from- I was in-" Hillalum stopped. "Do you know Babylon?"
"Oh, is that your destination? That is north of Erech. It is an easy journey between them."
"The tower. Have you heard of it?"
"Certainly, the pillar to heaven. It is said men at the top are tunneling through the vault of heaven."
Hillalum fell to the sand.
"Are you unwell?" The two caravan drivers mumbled to each other, and went off to confer with the others. Hillalum was not watching them.
He was in Shinar. He had returned to the earth. He had climbed above the reservoirs of heaven, and arrived back at the earth. Had Yahweh brought him to this place, to keep him from reaching further above? Yet Hillalum still hadn"t seen any signs, any indication that Yahweh noticed him. He had not experienced any miracle that Yahweh had performed to place him here. As far as he could see, he had merely swum up from the vault and entered the cavern below.
Somehow, the vault of heaven lay beneath the earth. It was as if they lay against each other, though they were separated by many leagues. How could that be? How could such distant places touch? Hillalum"s head hurt trying to think about it.
And then it came to him: a seal cylinder a seal cylinder. When rolled upon a tablet of soft clay, the carved cylinder left an imprint that formed a picture. Two figures might appear at opposite ends of the tablet, though they stood side by side on the surface of the cylinder. All the world was as such a cylinder. Men imagined heaven and earth as being at the ends of a tablet, with sky and stars stretched between; yet the world was wrapped around in some fantastic way so that heaven and earth touched.
It was clear now why Yahweh had not struck down the tower, had not punished men for wishing to reach beyond the bounds set for them: for the longest journey would merely return them to the place whence they"d come. Centuries of their labor would not reveal to them any more of Creation than they already knew. Yet through their endeavor, men would glimpse the unimaginable artistry of Yahweh"s work, in seeing how ingeniously the world had been constructed. By this construction, Yahweh"s work was indicated, and Yahweh"s work was concealed.
Thus would men know their place.
Hillalum rose to his feet, his legs unsteady from awe, and sought out the caravan drivers. He would go back to Babylon. Perhaps he would see Lugatum again. He would send word to those on the tower. He would tell them about the shape of the world.
Understand
A layer of ice; it feels rough against my face, but not cold. I"ve got nothing to hold on to; my gloves just keep sliding off it. I can see people on top, running around, but they can"t do anything. I"m trying to pound the ice with my fists, but my arms move in slow motion, and my lungs must have burst, and my head"s going fuzzy, and I feel like I"m dissolving- I wake up, screaming. My heart"s going like a jackhammer. Christ. I pull off my blankets and sit on the edge of the bed.
I couldn"t remember that before. Before I only remembered falling through the ice; the doctor said my mind had suppressed the rest. Now I remember it, and it"s the worst nightmare I"ve ever had.
I"m grabbing the down comforter with my fists, and I can feel myself trembling. I try to calm down, to breathe slowly, but sobs keep forcing their way out. It was so real I could feel it: feel feel what it was like to die. what it was like to die.
I was in that water for nearly an hour; I was more vegetable than anything else by the time they brought me up. Am I recovered? It was the first time the hospital had ever tried their new drug on someone with so much brain damage. Did it work?
The same nightmare, again and again. After the third time, I know I"m not going to sleep again. I spend the remaining hours before dawn worrying. Is this the result? Am I losing my mind?
Tomorrow is my weekly checkup with the resident at the hospital. I hope he"ll have some answers.
I drive into downtown Boston, and after half an hour Dr. Hooper can see me. I sit on a gurney in an examining room, behind a yellow curtain. Jutting out of the wall at waist height is a horizontal flatscreen, adjusted for tunnel vision so it appears blank from my angle. The doctor types at the keyboard, presumably calling up my file, and then starts examining me. As he"s checking my pupils with a penlight, I tell him about my nightmares.
"Did you ever have any before the accident, Leon?" He gets out his little mallet and taps at my elbows, knees, and ankles.
"Never. Are these a side effect of the drug?"
"Not a side effect. The hormone K therapy regenerated a lot of damaged neurons, and that"s an enormous change that your brain has to adjust to. The nightmares are probably just a sign of that."
"Is this permanent?"
"It"s unlikely," he says. "Once your brain gets used to having all those pathways again, you"ll be fine. Now touch your index finger to the tip of your nose, and then bring it to my finger here."
I do what he tells me. Next he has me tap each finger to my thumb, quickly. Then I have to walk a straight line, as if I"m taking a sobriety test. After that, he starts quizzing me.
"Name the parts of an ordinary shoe."
"There"s the sole, the heel, the laces. Um, the holes that the laces go through are eyes, and then there"s the tongue, underneath the laces...."
"Okay. Repeat this number: three nine one seven four-"
"-six two."
Dr. Hooper wasn"t expecting that. "What?"
"Three nine one seven four six two. You used that number the first time you examined me, when I was still an inpatient. I guess it"s a number you test patients with a lot."
"You weren"t supposed to memorize it; it"s meant to be a test of immediate recall."
"I didn"t intentionally memorize it. I just happened to remember it."
"Do you remember the number from the second time I examined you?"
I pause for a moment. "Four zero eight one five nine two."
He"s surprised. "Most people can"t retain so many digits if they"ve only heard them once. Do you use mnemonic tricks?"
I shake my head. "No. I always keep phone numbers in the autodialer."
He goes to the terminal and taps at the numeric keypad. "Try this one." He reads a fourteen-digit number, and I repeat it back to him. "You think you can do it backwards?" I recite the digits in reverse order. He frowns, and starts typing something into my file.
I"m sitting in front of a terminal in one of the testing rooms in the psychiatric ward; it"s the nearest place Dr. Hooper could get some intelligence tests. There"s a small mirror set in one wall, probably with a video camera behind it. In case it"s recording, I smile at it and wave briefly. I always do that to the hidden cameras in automatic cash machines.
Dr. Hooper comes in with a printout of my test results. "Well, Leon, you did... very well. On both tests you scored in the ninety-ninth percentile."
My jaw drops. "You"re kidding."
"No, I"m not." He has trouble believing it himself. "Now that number doesn"t indicate how many questions you got right; it means that relative to the general population-"
"I know what it means," I say absently. "I was in the seventieth percentile when they tested us in high school." Ninety-ninth percentile. Inwardly, I"m trying to find some sign of this. What should it feel like?
He sits down on the table, still looking at the printout. "You never attended college, did you?"
I return my attention to him. "I did, but I left before graduating. My ideas of education didn"t mesh with the professors"."
"I see." He probably takes this to mean I flunked out. "Well, clearly you"ve improved tremendously. A little of that may have come about naturally as you grew older, but most of it must be a result of the hormone K therapy."
"This is one h.e.l.l of a side effect."
"Well, don"t get too excited. Test scores don"t predict how well you can do things in the real world." I roll my eyes upward when Dr. Hooper isn"t looking. Something amazing is going on, and all he can offer is a truism. "I"d like to follow up on this with some more tests. Can you come in tomorrow?"
I"m in the middle of retouching a holograph when the phone rings. I waver between the phone and the console, and reluctantly opt for the phone. I"d normally have the answering machine take any calls when I"m editing, but I need to let people know I"m working again. I lost a lot of business when I was in the hospital: one of the risks of being a freelancer. I touch the phone and say, "Greco Holographics, Leon Greco speaking."
"Hey Leon, it"s Jerry."
"Hi Jerry. What"s up?" I"m still studying the image on the screen: it"s a pair of helical gears, intermeshed. A trite metaphor for cooperative action, but that"s what the customer wanted for his ad.
"You interested in seeing a movie tonight? Me and Sue and Tori were going to see Metal Eyes Metal Eyes."
"Tonight? Oh, I can"t. Tonight"s the last performance of the one-woman show at the Hanning Playhouse." The surfaces of the gear teeth are scratched and oily-looking. I highlight each surface using the cursor, and type in the parameters to be adjusted.
"What"s that?"
"It"s called Symplectic Symplectic. It"s a monologue in verse." Now I adjust the lighting, to remove some of the shadows from where the teeth mesh. "Want to come along?"
"Is this some kind of Shakespearean soliloquy?"
Too much: with that lighting, the outer edges will be too bright. I specify an upper limit for the reflected light"s intensity. "No, it"s a stream-of-consciousness piece, and it alternates between four different meters; iambic"s only one of them. All the critics called it a tour de force tour de force."
"I didn"t know you were such a fan of poetry."
After checking all the numbers once more, I let the computer recalculate the interference pattern. "Normally, I"m not, but this one seemed really interesting. How"s it sound to you?"