Tell Me Again, My Love

When she felt his warm body closing around her, she let herself go. She let the tears raining down her cheeks.

The pain she felt that time, it almost killed her. She loved him so much, unconsciously she depended on him to motivate her in her work. He was the reason she was involved in the modelling. She wanted to be closer to him but she had no talent in musical. When she got the chance to be a model, she felt happy, thinking it would close their gap. Maybe underneath her happy-go-lucky appearance, she had low esteem with their different social status. She was the daughter of hippy parents while he came from a wealthy family.

And, she thought when she became famous, he would not feel ashamed of introducing her as his girlfriend to everyone.

So, what else could she think when he kept arguing with her about this matter? Was he ashamed of her family background? Was he ashamed she did not continue her study to focus on her modelling work?

Was it her fault?

They had arguments over arguments. But when they did not meet, she missed him so much. She wanted to be with him to the point of thinking to quit being a model. She wanted to accompany him to the shows and tours, taking care of him.

But her parents, well, her mother actually, pulled her to sit and told her to quit being so hopeless in love and become a strong woman. She should not depend on a man and never let a man to control her life. Her mother did not raise her to be a typical housewife, putting the husband on top of everything.

So she cancelled her plan and agreed to more jobs, much to the chagrin of her mother. She swore she heard her mother murmured, "I was not talking about you becoming a victim to a capitalist world too."

But it did not put her spirit down.

Her mother could not stop being herself and Ryn accepted it a long time ago.

Before she went to see Jeremy, she accepted a job, coincidentally close enough but still she had to take a flight to go to Jeremy. She was still exhausted from the work and the travel. She only had coffee to wake herself up, brushed her teeth and made sure she looked pretty and no sign of tiredness on her face before she grabbed a taxi and went to the hotel.

When she saw that woman, she could not control her emotion and went to slap Jeremy. They had a huge argument and he even raised his voice at her.

She was hurt. He did not even try to coax her. He did not even follow her when she ran away. No apology, just a shout of "If you want to break-up, let"s break-up. We can live our own life."

And their love story ended just like that.

"I really am sorry. I was having a huge headache after drinking with Jennifer. You know she"s the guest artist of the show and she begged to have a drink, just a drink."

"So why was she wearing a robe?"

He frowned, trying to remember. "The drink spilled when she was helping me when I was having a headache."

"If both of you did not do anything wrong, why you did not allow me to get into the room?" she cried.

"Because I did not want you to misunderstand me."

"But the way you were acting was suspicious, J. You did not allow me entering your room. You did not even bother to explain. You yelled at me, scolding me for not telling you first I was coming."

"Because I was having a headache. I could not think clearly. And I was still jealous of you for taking pictures with that man. You did not even tell me you had a photo session with him and…"

"It was such a weak excuse, J. I cannot accept your reason. You did not even call me. Even if you were having a headache that time, was the pain prolong for two years? Two whole years you did not even try to find me."

"I tried to find you. I did. However, you did not go to your usual place. Your parents did not tell me where you have gone. Then they disappeared. I could not contact you. Then Mika fell sick and I had to focus on her after she tried to commit suicide. We never thought she was holding you as her anchor and your disappearance made her lose hope."

She cried even harder. She regretted doing that to Mika but she was in so much pain, she needed to run away. She needed a place away from everyone to forget. She could not do her job. She just curled herself in a room and cried her heart out.
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When her parents finally came, they had to pull her out of the room. She was never left alone until one day, her father suggested for her to find a new activity to do rather than spending the time in the room moping.

She decided to continue her study.

But she was no longer her old self. She did not even pretend to be happy in front of people. She kept to herself. Only went to cla.s.s and then returned home. She did not bother to socialize with her cla.s.smates and other people.

She was a new Ryn; a quiet and cold Ryn.

"I decided to quit and help dad with his company. Then, in order to distract Mika, dad and I opened a company and half of the managing responsibility fell onto her. We let her do whatever she wanted. A jewellery and clothing line. All under one brand and one company. Mika seemed like she was getting better when she was busy with both lines."

"So you were busy building the company?"

"I was trying to run away from the fact I was too stupid to lose you. I was telling myself it was a nightmare and soon you would come back and we would be back to when we used to. I was preparing for dowry for our wedding. I was thinking it would be better for me to prepare everything first then I would go to you and beg you on one knee to marry me."

"A dowry? Have you ever thought the time you did not look for me, that I might meet someone else?"

His face changed.