"Six,--pa and ma eight,--aunt nine,--governess ten,--grandfather and grandmother, twelve. Then, there"s the footman who stands outside with a bag of oranges and a jug of toast-and-water, and sees the play for nothing through the little pane of gla.s.s in the box-door--it"s cheap at a guinea; they gain by taking a box."
"I wonder you allow so many," observed Nicholas.
"There"s no help for it," replied Mr. Crummles; "it"s always expected in the country. If there are six children, six people come to hold them in their laps. Ring in the orchestra, Grudden!"
It was Mr. Crummles" habit to give a benefit performance, commonly called a "bespeak," to any member of his company fortunate enough to have either a birthday or any other anniversary of sufficient importance to challenge attention on the posters, and not long after Nicholas entered the company, this honor fell to the lot of one of the prominent actresses, Miss Snevellicci. Mr. Crummles then informed Nicholas that there was some work for him to do before that event took place.
"There"s a little canva.s.sing takes place on these occasions," said Mr.
Crummles, "among the patrons, and the fact is, Snevellicci has had so many bespeaks in this place that she wants an attraction. She had one when her stepmother died, and when her uncle died; and Mrs. Crummles and myself have had them on the anniversary of the Phenomenon"s birthday, and our wedding-day, and occasions of that description; so that, in fact, it is hard to get a good one. Now, won"t you help this poor girl, Mr. Johnson, by calling with her to-morrow morning upon one or two of the princ.i.p.al people?"--asked the manager in a persuasive tone, adding, "The Infant will accompany her. There will not be the smallest impropriety, sir. It would be of material service--the gentleman from London--author of the new piece--actor in the new piece--first appearance on any boards--it would lead to a great bespeak, Mr. Johnson."
The idea was extremely distasteful to Nicholas; but out of kindness to Miss Snevellicci, he reluctantly consented to be one of the canva.s.sing party, and accordingly the next morning, sallied forth with Miss Snevellicci and the Infant Phenomenon.
The Phenomenon was rather a troublesome companion, for first the right sandal came down, and then the left, and these mischances being repaired, one leg of the little white trousers was discovered to be longer than the other; then the little green parasol with a broad fringe border and no handle, which she bore in her hand, was dropped down an iron grating, and only fished up again by dint of much exertion.
However, it was impossible to scold her, as she was the manager"s daughter, so Nicholas took it all in perfect good humor and walked on, with Miss Snevellicci, arm in arm, on one side, and the offending infant on the other.
At the first house they visited, after having a long conversation concerning the stage, and its relation to life, they at length disposed of two boxes, and retired, glad that the conference was at an end.
At the next house they were in great glory, for there resided the six children who had been enraptured with the Phenomenon, and who, being called down from the nursery to be treated with a private view of that young lady, proceeded to poke their fingers into her eyes, and tread upon her toes, and show her many other little attentions peculiar to their time of life.
"I shall certainly persuade Mr. Borum to take a private box," said the lady of the house, after a most gracious reception; "Augustus, you naughty boy, leave the little girl alone." This was addressed to a young gentleman who was pinching the Phenomenon from behind, apparently with a view to ascertaining whether she was real.
"I am sure you must be very tired," said the mamma, turning to Miss Snevellicci. "I cannot think of allowing you to go without first taking a gla.s.s of wine. Fie, Charlotte, I am ashamed of you: Miss Lane, my dear, pray see to the children."
This entreaty addressed to the governess, was rendered necessary by the behavior of the youngest Miss Borum, who, having filched the Phenomenon"s little green parasol, was now carrying it bodily off, while the distracted Infant looked helplessly on, and presently the poor child was really in a fair way to be torn limb from limb, for two strong little boys, one holding on by each of her hands, were dragging her in different directions as a trial of strength. However, at this juncture Miss Lane rescued the unhappy victim, who was presently taken away, after sustaining no more serious damage than a flattening of the pink gauze bonnet, and a rather extensive creasing of the white frock and trousers. Her companions were thankful not only when the call was ended, but when the whole trying morning, with its series of visits, was over.
The benefit performance was a great success, and the new actor made such a decided hit on that night and the succeeding ones, that Mr. Crummies prolonged his stay in Portsmouth for a fortnight beyond the days allotted to it, during which time Nicholas attracted so many people to the theatre that the manager finally decided upon giving him a benefit, calculating that it would be a promising speculation. From it Nicholas realized no less a sum than twenty pounds, which, added to what he had earned before, made him feel quite rich and comfortable.
At that time he received a letter containing news of his sister in London, and a danger that menaced her, which made him prepare to leave Portsmouth without an hour"s delay, if he should be summoned.
Accordingly he decided to acquaint his manager with the possibility of his withdrawal from the company, and hastened to the green-room for that purpose, where he found Mrs. Crummies in full regal costume, with the Phenomenon as the Maiden, in her maternal arms. He broke the news to the group as gently as possible, but it was received with great dismay, and there were both protestations and tears, while the Phenomenon, being of an affectionate nature and moreover excitable, raised a loud cry, and was soothed with extreme difficulty, showing that the child"s heart was in the right place, notwithstanding the constant strain upon her emotions from being so often obliged to simulate unnatural ones.
Mr. Crummles was no sooner acquainted with the news than he evinced many tokens of grief, but finding Nicholas determined in his purpose, at once suggested a grand farewell performance, to be advertised as a brilliant display of fireworks.
"That would be rather expensive," suggested Nicholas dryly.
"Eighteen-pence would do it," said Mr. Crummles; "You on the top of a pair of steps with the Phenomenon in an att.i.tude; "FAREWELL," on a transparency behind; and nine people at the wings with a squib in each hand--all the dozen and a half going off at once--it would be very grand--awful from the front, quite awful."
As Nicholas appeared by no means impressed with the idea, but laughed heartily at it, Mr. Crummles abandoned the project, and gloomily observed that they must make up the best bill they could, with combats and hornpipes, and so stick to the legitimate drama.
Next day the posters appeared, and the public were informed that Mr.
Johnson would have the honor of making his last appearance that evening, and that an early application for places was requested, in consequence of the extraordinary overflow attendant on his performances.
Upon entering the theatre that night, Nicholas found all the company in a state of extreme excitement, and Mr. Crummles at once informed him in an agitated voice that there was a London manager in one of the boxes.
"It"s the Phenomenon, depend upon it, sir," said Crummies. "I have not the smallest doubt it"s the fame of the Phenomenon. She shall have ten pound a week, Johnson; she shall not appear on the London boards for a farthing less. They shan"t engage her either, unless they engage Mrs.
Crummles too; twenty pound a week for the pair, or I"ll throw in myself and the two boys, and they shall have the family for thirty. Thirty pound a week. It"s too cheap, Johnson. It"s dirt cheap."
Every individual member of the company had in the same manner decided that it was his or her attractions that had drawn the great man"s attention to the Portsmouth theatre, and each one secretly decided upon the amount of inducement necessary to persuade him or her to make a new engagement. Everybody played to the stranger, everybody sang to him, everything was done for his exclusive benefit, and it was a cruel blow to the general expectations when he was discovered to be asleep, and shortly after that he woke up and went away: in consequence of which, the feelings of the company, collectively and severally, underwent a severe reaction. Nicholas alone, had no feeling whatsoever on the subject, except of amus.e.m.e.nt. He went through his part as briskly as he could, then took Smike"s arm and walked home to bed.
With the post next morning came the letter he had been expecting, calling him instantly to London, and he at once hurried off to say farewell to Mr. Crummles. His news was received with keen regret by that gentleman, who, always mindful of theatrical effects followed Nicholas even to the coach itself. As that vehicle stood in the open street, ready to start, and Nicholas was about to enter it, he was not a little astonished to find himself suddenly clutched in a violent embrace which nearly took him off his legs; while Mr. Crummles" voice exclaimed, "It is he--my friend, my friend!"
"Bless my heart," cried Nicholas, struggling in the manager"s arms, "What are you about?"
The manager made no reply, but strained him to his breast again, exclaiming, "Farewell, my n.o.ble, my lion-hearted boy!"
In fact Mr. Crummles, who could never lose any opportunity for professional display, had turned out for the express purpose of taking a public farewell of Nicholas, and to render it the more imposing, the elder Master Crummles was going through a similar ceremony with Smike; while Master Percy Crummles, with a second-hand cloak worn theatrically over his left shoulder, stood by, in att.i.tude of an attendant officer waiting to convey two victims to the scaffold.
The lookers-on laughed very heartily, and as it was well to put a good face upon the matter, Nicholas laughed too, when he had succeeded in disengaging himself; and rescuing the astonished Smike, climbed up to the coach-roof after him, waving farewell, as they rolled away.
Some years later, when Nicholas was residing in London, under very different circ.u.mstances from those of his Portsmouth experience, and with a very different occupation; walking home one evening, he stood outside a minor theatre which he had to pa.s.s, and found himself poring over a huge play-bill which announced in large letters;
_Positively the last appearance of Mr. Vincent Crummles, of Provincial Celebrity!!!_
"Nonsense!" said Nicholas, preparing to resume his walk, then turning back again, "It can"t be,"--but adding on second thoughts--"Surely it _must_ be the same man. There can"t be two Vincent Crummleses."
The better to settle the question he referred to the bill again, and finding there was a Baron in the first piece, whose son was enacted by one Master Crummles, and his nephew by one Master Percy Crummles, and that, incidental to the piece was a castanet _pas seul_ by the Infant Phenomenon, he no longer entertained any doubt; and presenting himself at the stage door at once, sent in a sc.r.a.p of paper with "Mr. Johnson"
written thereon in pencil, and was presently conducted into the presence of his former manager.
Mr. Crummles was unfeignedly glad to see him, and in the course of a long conversation informed Nicholas that the next morning he and his were to sail for America, that he had made up his mind to settle there permanently, in the hope of acquiring some land of his own, which would support them in their old age, and which they could afterward bequeath to their children. Nicholas, having highly commended this resolution, Mr. Crummles imparted such further intelligence relative to their mutual friends as he thought might prove interesting, and added a hearty invitation to Nicholas to attend that night a farewell supper, to be given in their honor at a neighboring tavern.
This invitation Nicholas instantly accepted, promising to return at the conclusion of the performances, and availed himself of this interval to go out and buy a silver snuff-box as a token of remembrance for Mr.
Crummles, also a pair of ear-rings for Mrs. Crummles, a necklace for the Phenomenon, and a flaming shirt-pin for each of the young gentlemen, after making which purchases he returned to the theatre, and repaired to the tavern with Mr. Crummles.
He was received with great cordiality by those of the party whom he knew, and with particular joy by Mrs. Crummles, who at once said: "Here is one whom you know,"--thrusting forward the Phenomenon, in a blue gauze frock, extensively flounced, and trousers of the same.
Nicholas stooped down to salute the Phenomenon, and then, supper being on table, Mrs. Crummles gave her hand to Nicholas and repaired with a stately step to the repast, followed by the other guests.
The board being at length cleared of food; and punch, wine, and spirits being placed upon it, and handed about, speeches were made, and health drunk to Mr. and Mrs. Vincent Crummles and the young Crummleses, after which ceremony, with many adieus and embraces, the company dispersed.
Nicholas waited until he was alone with the family, to give his little presents, and then with honest warmth of feeling said farewell to Mr.
and Mrs. Crummles, the Master Crummleses, and the Infant Phenomenon,--and history has not chronicled their further career, nor recorded to what greater heights of popularity the Infant Phenomenon has since attained.
JENNY WREN
[Ill.u.s.tration: JENNY WREN]
JENNY WREN
Her real name was f.a.n.n.y Cleaver, but she had long ago dropped it, and chosen to bestow upon herself the fanciful appellation of Miss Jenny Wren, by which t.i.tle she was known to the entire circle of her friends and business acquaintances.
Miss Wren"s home was in a certain little street called Church Street, running out from a certain square called Smith Square, at Millbank, and there the little lady plied her trade, early and late, having for companions her father and a lodger, Lizzie Hexam. Her father had once been a good workman at his own trade, but unfortunately for poor little Jenny Wren, was so weak in character and so confirmed in bad habits that she could place no trust in him, and had come to consider herself the head of the family, and to speak of him as "my child," or "my bad boy,"
ordering him about as if he were in truth, a child.