Tensei Shite Inaka de Slowlife wo Okuritai

29 DECEMBER, 2016 / KUDARAJIN

Spicy spicy

Since it was soon season to harvest the barley, Coryatt Village was feeling somewhat buoyant.

The way the green shade gradually was turning into a golden one made people even more excited.

This year too, summer came for me.

Since the barley seeds were sown in October last year, the harvest is from August to September this year.

This world also has four seasons and the climate is similar to j.a.pan. There are pretty flowers in spring, it gets hot in summer, and the leaves change colour in autumn. In winter, though it’s only a bit, snow sometimes falls.

The change in seasons really reminds that time keeps flowing.

Though there are villagers whose attire doesn’t change from summer to winter, I wonder what’s up with that. Especially Roland, that ojisan.

Men wear comfortable linen clothes and long pants.

Women wear one-piece dresses with strings tied around their b.r.e.a.s.t.s or waists. Because they were made s.p.a.cious, sometimes I don’t know where to place my eyes, but I think that’s grand in its own way.

Now then, I’m saying this again, but the season is summer. Today is the day that the traitor comes.

By traitor, he was someone that once was together with Bartholo and me. Was. Past tense.

Death to the traitor. I’ll carve that into his very bones.

A bit past lunch, the guy came. Sarah called, so Bartholo and I went out to greet him.

When we headed out the front entrance, there were three large wagons in the garden.

I was surprised at the number of wagons. When he came last year, he had only one wagon with two carriers and one mercenary, lacking both goods and personnel.

Maybe there was a separate wagon for business in the village, since I heard horse sounds from outside the grounds.

“I’m here again, man! Alfried-sama!”

The guy opened his arms wide and pretended to be friendly and happy at out reunion.

I see. It seems like this guy forgot about him tattling to the maids.

“Hey Tri. Welcome again.”

Interpretation: [You’re brave, showing your face to us again.”

“I’m glad to see you again! Toriela!”

Interpretation: [I’ve been waiting for the day to bash your face in!]

“R-Really? I’m happy too, man.”

Maybe feeling our black aura, Toriela became a bit wary.

He’s a merchant for sure. His intuition is sharp. However, to not realise his own mistakes, how foolish.

“You’ve come a long way, right? Come in.”

When I said that, Bartholo opened the door and gestured Toriela into the mansion.

Amazing Bartholo. That flowing, swift movement was like that of a butler who could read his master’s thoughts. Though I wouldn’t know since we don’t have a butler.

Maybe a bodyguard then.

“Heh? Then, coming right through, man.”

I wonder if he got cautious because we were politer than usual. These kinds of things are usually done by Mel or Sarah after all.

Toriela looked back and forth between us and the door and hesitated as he went into the house.

Death to the traitor.

This person called Toriela is man trading with small villages ever since I was born here.

Before then, Toriela’s father seemed to have been handling the business. He grew old and his back hurt often, so he pa.s.sed the business down to his son, Toriela.

Toriela, unlike his father, is very frivolous. He always adds “man”[1] at the ends of his sentences, bit like an untrustworthy soldier.

He’s twenty-two years old. He has unkempt blond hair and green eyes. His face is on the flat side, so rather than ‘handsome’ ‘cute’ is the better word for him.

Before, he felt like a rustic village boy, but now he wears high-quality white shirts and a green top. He has a fine black belt and a green ¾ trousers.

He probably made a lot of money using Reversi or the spaghetti I thought up.

Toriela doesn’t feel dependable and looks like someone that will forget something every three steps.
Because of that, I call Toriela ‘Tori’.

It feels like he’s a bird that cries, ‘Ssu! Ssu!”[2]

However, Tori’s intuition is sharp. This is what he said the moment he met Celia-san:

[It’s gonna be bad if I turn the women of this village into my enemies!]

Figuring it out from a glance…… even though he’s just Tori. He must have survived quite the pandemonium. I heard that there are n.o.bles that live using intrigue in the capital. The capital… what a scary place.

Moreover, Tori’s suggestions are quite brilliant, proposing things that I couldn’t think of. Seeing this, I sold the rights over Reversi to him.

I knew him from a long time ago, so I could trust him.

Well, I have no plans to work hard as a merchant and succeed, so it didn’t really matter.

Just from teleporting here and there to transport foodstuffs will earn me enough money.

“Really—, thanks to Reversi, I could open a store in the capital.”

The moment he entered the drawing room he sat down and stretched.

“Thanks to Tori selling efficiently, we’re doing well too. The village is becoming affluent too.”

By the way, the profits from Reversi go into the budge of House Slowlet, so I don’t know how much we’re earning.

Since it seems like the village and the mansion is buying lots of sugar and salt, we must have got quite prosperous.

“Alfried-sama was always a regular, and there’s the reversi too, man. I want to be in your patronage for a long time, man!”

Toriela and House Slowlet is in a win-win relationship. Just from me giving the idea, he sells well, so I want to ask for more things in the future.

However, I can’t forgive him for betraying Bartholo and me last time.

Because of Tori, the sweet cooking life of Bartholo and me was destroyed, that we had to spend a bitter, bitter week.

I’ll have to show Tori the same bitterness.

I’ll never forgive him.

“Now then, I wanna talk about business, but man, I haven’t had a bath from this long trip……”

There’s no way there are hotels in this world, and if there’s no source of water during travels, there might be situations where bathing is impossible.

Stopping at village would spare people from having to sleep outside, but there are no baths. It seems like travelling would be impossible for a j.a.panese like me.

“Indeed, we’re not in any hurry. Take a bath. I’ve prepared it in advance.”

“Man~ Alfried-sama, you know the good stuff. The bath here is grander than ones in high-quality inns in the capital, man!”

Tori stood up vigorously, as a smile formed on my face.

Maybe I should play a prank on the bath.

“Ah, come to think of it, the rice? stuff Alfried-sama mentioned——“

“Wait! Sit down! Tell me about it! Quickly!

Rice? Rice!?

“Ah, yessir.”

He backed away a bit from my force, but I don’t mind. I don’t care if I get called a pervert if it’s for rice.

“So? Did you get some?”

“Y-Yes—. Though there’s only a bit.”

“How many hundred kilograms? Tonnes? I wonder if that won’t be enough……”

The main food of j.a.pan. Our comfort food, rice.

Before I realise it, I’m seeking for ingredients that would go well with rice.

However, there aren’t many people that know how much rice we j.a.panese people eat a year.

Every year, one person eats a bagful of rice.

One bag of rice equals 60kg.

However, that’s on Earth so it might not be exactly same here, but it should still be about 60kg, or up to 80kg including individual differences.

It’s an obvious thing, but rice is grown in paddies.

Then, how much of these paddies are required for enough for one person to eat?

The measurement used for rice is tanbu.

1 tanbu is equivalent to 31.5m x 31.5m = 992.25m2.

From this one tanbu, eight to nine straw bagfuls of rice can be gained on b.u.mper years.

Thus, one tanbu, can satisfy someone for seven to eight years.

To be more specific, just half a tennis court’s size for a rice paddy is enough for me.

Even if I’m just six, I want to have at least 40kg.

“Erm, Alfried-sama? You listening, man?”

“Oops, sorry, I was thinking about something else.”

“That was an uncommonly serious expression, man.”

“So, how much? About a tonne?”

“That’s not possible, man. I sc.r.a.ped up 100kg at most, man.”

“Too little! That won’t last even two years!”

“No, I’ll bring more if I get more, man?”

“Tori…… I’m glad I met you. Now, get in the bath. When you come out, I’ll serve you chilled ale and hamburg steak.”

At that moment, I probably was making the best smile in the world.

Betrayal or something petty like that, I don’t care anymore. There’s happiness where there’s rice. There won’t be war anymore.

“A-Aight. Thanks, man. I’m glad I could live up to your expectations, man.”

Behind me who was walking with a broad smile, Tori was following with a bitter smile.

“Now now, have some candy.”

“Huh? What’s this, man?”

“It’s sweet. Your fatigue will go away, so try it.”

With a smile, I gave him a candy wrapped in paper. I had it cooled with ice magic so it won’t melt in summer.

“Thanks, man.”

Seeing Toriela’s eyes go wide with a happy expression on his face upon having the candy, I smiled.

I led Toriela who returned to being out ally.

Then, I headed to the kitchen where my accomplice for the plan was waiting.

Mn—, Can we stop the revenge since we have rice now? Will Bartholo accept that, I wonder?
It was Bartholo who went through the biggest ordeal after all.

“Alfried-sama.”

“Mn? What is it?”

While I was walking down the hallway, Mina called and stopped me.

“A while ago, from Toriela-sama, I heard that Alfried-sama has something sweet.”

Ah—, she went into the mode where she’s not the disappointing maid.

“I don’t have any——”

“Is that so. Then, time to report to Eleano——”

“I’m joking, just joking! I lied! A joke! I just teased you! Mina! There are three more here!”

I quickly moved and held out three candies.

Seeing that, Mina frowned a little. She probably thought, ‘there’s not much.’

“Alfried-sama.”

“Yes?”

“Please jump on the spot.”

“Mn?”

Pyon, pyon. Gacha, chari, gasa.[3]

“There’s still more.”

“Ah, yes, sorry. This is the lost.”

The moment she received them, she popped one into her mouth and left with a slovenly face.

“That was a shakedown!”

No one saw my scene of agony.

Again, my fury towards Toriela boiled up again. Because he said something unnecessary, I was blackmailed. Mina is a maid, right? I’m a n.o.ble, right? How could this happen. No, before a maid, Mina is a woman, and I’m a man before I’m a n.o.ble, I guess……

“Oh—, kiddo. I just finished the hamburg steak kneaded with plenty of akara fruit!”

Akara[4] fruit is a very spicy fruit that looks like a slightly shrivelled smallish tomato. A little makes for a great side dish, but failure to control the amount leads to extreme spiciness.

This time, I was planning on feeding that to Tori.

“Akara won’t do……”

“Oh? What’s wrong? That’s what you suggested, though, kiddo?”

“Just one akara fruit is not enough! Because of Tori, Mina found out about the new stuff!”

“W-What!?”

Bartholo looked at me with a petrified expression.

Sorry Bartholo. It might have been my fault for opening up a bit to that guy.

Tori, that b.a.s.t.a.r.d!

“……So, this hamburg steak is halfhearted for him. We need more akara fruits! I’ll also use really spicy mushrooms!”

Bartholo’s expression changed to that of rage and started making more hamburg steak with vigorous movements.

Bartholo, too, making something even worse, that’s amazing. The grudge over food is amazing. More importantly, what should we do about this hamburg steak—.
On the kitchen table, there was a dish of that experimental hamburg. To disguise the characteristic red shade of akara fruit, carrots were used. At a glance, nothing wrong can be felt.

Maybe I’ll give it to Silvio-niisan later.

Thinking that, I moved that to a corner of the kitchen table and started cooking.

The hamburg patty with the new ingredients was completed and was getting grilled.

“Waa—, what a nice smell! Hamburg! I like this~”

Then, maybe attracted from the nice scent, Eleanora-neesan entered the kitchen.

Is Eleanora-neesan a dog or something?

“Sorry, we’re grilling more now.”

It was going to be done soon, so I couldn’t take my eyes off the meat. Despite how it looks, meat is difficult.

“H—m, boring. I’m hungry, so can I have some? I had swordplay training in the morning.”

Seeing my serious expression, maybe she got that I wouldn’t play with her. Eleanora-neesan leaned her elbow against the kitchen table with a bored expression.

“Mn—? Then there should be some over there, you can have them.”

“Did you make them, Al?”

“Yeah, yeah.”

I wish she’ll eat up and go away quickly.

“Then I’ll have the one on the tip—”

“Yeah yeah. Eat up, eat up. Your cute little brother Alfried made it with his everyday grat.i.tude.”

“O-Oi, kiddo, the one on the tip is……”

“……Huh? Tip? Eh! Ah! Wai——”

Before she could hear my reply, Eleanora-neesan grabbed the hamburg steak with her hands in an unmannerly way and put it in her mouth.

“Hooooooooooot! —Wa—! Ii———!”

Eleanora-neesan yelled something hysterically. What was that at the end?

I’m not sure what she was saying, but I could clearly get that she was infuriated.

After having water and other things in her mouth for five minutes, Eleanora-neesan calmed down, but she glared at me with her now-red eyes.

Maybe because her tongue was still hot, she seemed to have trouble breathing. Since she had something hot.

“I see, I got Al’s feelings ve—ry well.”

She’s smiling, but it’s very scary. Is it that? Does Eleanora-neesan take after Elna-kaasan?

“No, that…… that was…… Eleanora-neesan is the spice of my life, or akara fruit…… ah, yes! You’re something sharp and hot to me!”

I turned the gaze I was averting back towards Eleanora-neesan.

That moment, hamburg steak was thrust into my mouth. Then akara fruit violated my mouth.

I don’t remember what happened afterwards.
When I came to, it was nighttime and I was lying on my bed.

At that time, I shouldn’t have said anything and just bowed low to beg for forgiveness. Though I’m not sure if I would have been forgiven with that.

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[1]It’s ‘-ssu (ッス)’, but I couldn’t bear having that every other sentence.
[2]Tori = bird (鳥)
[3]Jumping sounds and rustling sounds.
[4]Probably a portmanteau of akai (赤い, spicy) and karai (辛い, spicy).