"Ottilia has done that."
"Baroness, can I believe you?--and alone?"
A marvellous twinkle of shuffle appeared in the small slate-coloured eyes I looked at under their roofing of thick black eyebrows.
"Alone," she said. "That is, she was precautious to have her giant to protect her from violence. There you have a glimmering of reason in her; and all of it that I can see."
"Old Schwartz is a very faithful servant," said I, thinking that she resembled the old Warhead in visage.
"A dog"s obedience to the master"s whims you call faithfulness! Hem!"
The baroness coughed dryly.
I whispered: "Does Prince Ernest--is he aware?"
"You are aware," retorted the baroness, "that what a man idolizes he won"t see flaw in. Remember, I am something here, or I am nothing."
The enigmatical remark was received by me decorously as a piece of merited chastis.e.m.e.nt. Nodding with gravity, I expressed regrets that the sea did not please her, otherwise I could have offered her a yacht for a cruise. She nodded stiffly. Her mouth shut up a smile, showing more of the door than the ray. The dinner, virtually a German supper, ended in general conversation on political affairs, preceded and supported by a discussion between the Prussian-hearted General and the Austrian-hearted margravine. Prince Ernest, true to his view that diplomacy was the weapon of minor sovereigns, held the balance, with now a foot in one scale, now in the other; a politic proceeding, so long as the rival powers pa.s.sively consent to be weighed.
We trifled with music, made our bow to the ladies, and changed garments for the smoking-room. Prince Ernest smoked his one cigar among guests.
The General, the Chancellor, and the doctor, knew the signal for retirement, and rose simultaneously with the discharge of his cigar-end in sparks on the unlit logwood pile. My father and Mr. Peterborough kept their chairs.
There was, I felt with relief, no plot, for nothing had been definitely a.s.sented to by me. I received Prince Ernest"s proffer of his hand, on making my adieux to him, with a pa.s.sably clear conscience.
I went out to the library. A man came in for orders; I had none to give.
He saw that the shutters were fixed and the curtains down, examined my hand-lamp, and placed lamps on the reading-desk and mantel-piece. Bronze busts of sages became my solitary companions. The room was long, low and dusky, voluminously and richly hung with draperies at the farther end, where a table stood for the prince to jot down memoranda, and a sofa to incline him to the relaxation of romance-reading. A door at this end led to the sleeping apartments of the West wing of the palace. Where I sat the student had ranges of cla.s.sical volumes in prospect and cla.s.sic heads; no other decoration to the walls. I paced to and fro and should have flung myself on the sofa but for a heap of books there covered from dust, perhaps concealed, that the yellow Parisian volumes, of which I caught sight of some new dozen, might not be an attraction to the eyes of chance-comers. At the lake-palace the prince frequently gave audience here. He had said to me, when I stated my wish to read in the library, "You keep to the cla.s.sical department?" I thought it possible he might not like the coloured volumes to be inspected; I had no taste for a perusal of them. I picked up one that fell during my walk, and flung it back, and disturbed a heap under cover, for more fell, and there I let them lie.
Ottilia did not keep me waiting.
CHAPTER x.x.xV. THE SCENE IN THE LAKE-PALACE LIBRARY
I was humming the burden of Gothe"s Zigeunerlied, a favourite one with me whenever I had too much to think of, or nothing. A low rush of sound from the hall-doorway swung me on my heel, and I saw her standing with a silver lamp raised in her right hand to the level of her head, as if she expected to meet obscurity. A thin blue Indian scarf mufed her throat and shoulders. Her hair was loosely knotted. The lamp"s full glow illumined and shadowed her. She was like a statue of Twilight.
I went up to her quickly, and closed the door, saying, "You have come"; my voice was not much above a breath.
She looked distrustfully down the length of the room; "You were speaking to some one?"
"No."
"You were speaking."
"To myself, then, I suppose."
I remembered and repeated the gipsy burden.
She smiled faintly and said it was the hour for Anna and Ursel and Kith and Liese to be out.
Her hands were gloved, a small matter to tell of.
We heard the portico-sentinel challenged and relieved.
"Midnight," I said.
She replied: "You were not definite in your directions about the minutes."
"I feared to name midnight."
"Why?"
"Lest the appointment of midnight--I lose my knowledge of you!--should make you reflect, frighten you. You see, I am inventing a reason; I really cannot tell why, if it was not that I hoped to have just those few minutes more of you. And now they"re gone. I would not have asked you but that I thought you free to act."
"I am."
"And you come freely?"
"A "therefore" belongs to every grant of freedom."
"I understand: your judgement was against it."
"Be comforted," she said; "it is your right to bid me come, if you think fit."
One of the sofa-volumes fell. She caught her breath; and smiled at her foolish alarm.
I told her that it was my intention to start for England in the morning; that this was the only moment I had, and would be the last interview: my rights, if I possessed any, and I was not aware that I did, I threw down.
"You throw down one end of the chain," she said.
"In the name of heaven, then," cried I, "release yourself."
She shook her head. "That is not my meaning."
Note the predicament of a lover who has a piece of dishonesty lurking in him. My chilled self-love had certainly the right to demand the explanation of her coldness, and I could very well guess that a word or two drawn from the neighbourhood of the heart would fetch a warmer current to unlock the ice between us, but feeling the coldness I complained of to be probably a suspicion, I fixed on the suspicion as a new and deeper injury done to my loyal love for her, and armed against that I dared not take an initiative for fear of unexpectedly justifying it by betraying myself.
Yet, supposing her inclination to have become diverted, I was ready frankly to release her with one squeeze of hands and take all the pain of she pain, and I said: "Pray, do not speak of chains."
"But they exist. Things cannot be undone for us two by words."
The tremble as of a strung wire in the strenuous pitch of her voice seemed to say she was not cold, though her gloved hand resting its finger-ends on the table, her restrained att.i.tude, her very calm eyes, declared the reverse. This and that sensation beset me in turn.
We shrank oddly from uttering one another"s Christian name. I was the first with it; my "Ottilia!" brought soon after "Harry" on her lips, and an atmosphere about us much less Arctic.
"Ottilia, you have told me you wish me to go to England."
"I have."
"We shall be friends."