The end was an extraordinary trembling in the limb abandoned to me.
It seized her frame. I would have detained her, but it was plain she suffered both in her heart and her pride. Her voice was under fair command-more than mine was. She counselled me to go to London, at once.
"I would be off to London if I were you, Harry,"--for the purpose of checking my father"s extravagances,--would have been the further wording, which she spared me; and I thanked her, wishing, at the same time, that she would get the habit of using choicer phrases whenever there might, by chance, be a stress of emotion between us. Her trembling, and her "I"d be off," came into unpleasant collision in the recollection.
I acknowledge to myself that she was a true and hearty friend. She listened with interest to my discourse on the necessity of my being in Parliament before I could venture to propose formally for the hand of the princess, and undertook to bear the burden of all consequent negotiations with my grandfather. If she would but have allowed me to speak of Temple, instead of saying, "Don"t, Harry, I like him so much!" at the very mention of his name, I should have sincerely felt my indebtedness to her, and some admiration of her fine spirit and figure besides. I could not even agree with my aunt Dorothy that Janet was handsome. When I had to grant her a pardon I appreciated her better.
CHAPTER x.x.xVIII. MY BANKERS" BOOK
The squire again did honour to Janet"s eulogy and good management of him.
"And where," said she, "would you find a Radical to behave so generously, Harry, when it touches him so?"
He accorded me his permission to select my side in politics, merely insisting that I was never to change it, and this he requested me to swear to, for (he called the ghost of old Sewis to witness) he abhorred a turncoat.
"If you"re to be a Whig, or a sneaking half-and-half, I can"t help you much," he remarked. "I can pop a young Tory in for my borough, maybe; but I can"t insult a number of independent Englishmen by asking them to vote for the opposite crew; that"s reasonable, eh? And I can"t promise you plumpers for the county neither. You can date your Address from Riversley. You"ll have your house in town. Tell me this princess of yours is ready with her hand, and," he threw in roughly, "is a respectable young woman, I"ll commence building. You"ll have a house fit for a prince in town and country, both."
Temple had produced an effect on him by informing him that "this princess of mine" was ent.i.tled to be considered a fit and proper person, in rank and blood, for an alliance with the proudest royal Houses of Europe, and my grandfather was not quite dest.i.tute of consolation in the prospect I presented to him. He was a curious study to me, of the Tory mind, in its attachment to solidity, fixity, certainty, its unmatched generosity within a limit, its devotion to the family, and its family eye for the country. An immediate introduction to Ottilia would have won him to enjoy the idea of his grandson"s marriage; but not having seen her, he could not realize her dignity, nor even the womanliness of a "foreign woman."
"Thank G.o.d for one thing," he said: "we shan"t have that fellow bothering--shan"t have the other half of your family messing the business. You"ll have to account for him to your wife as you best can.
I "ve nothing to do with him, mind that. He came to my house, stole my daughter, crazed her wits, dragged us all..."
The excuse to turn away from the hearing of abuse of my father was too good to be neglected, though it was horribly humiliating that I should have to take advantage of it--vexatious that I should seem chargeable with tacit lying in allowing the squire to suppose the man he hated to be a stranger to the princess. Not feeling sure whether it might be common prudence to delude him even pa.s.sively, I thought of asking Janet for her opinion, but refrained. A stout deceiver has his merits, but a feeble hypocrite applying to friends to fortify him in his shifts and tergiversations must provoke contempt. I desired that Janet might continue to think well of me. I was beginning to drop in my own esteem, which was the mirror of my conception of Ottilia"s view of her lover.
Now, had I consulted Janet, I believe the course of my history would have been different, for she would not then, I may imagine, have been guilty of her fatal slip of the tongue that threw us into heavy seas when we thought ourselves floating on ca.n.a.l waters. A ca.n.a.l barge (an image to me of the most perfect attainable peace), suddenly, on its pa.s.sage through our long fir-woods, with their scented reeds and flowing rushes, wild balsam and silky cotton-gra.s.s beds, sluiced out to sea and storm, would be somewhat in my likeness soon after a single luckless observation had pa.s.sed at our Riversley breakfast-table one Sunday morning.
My aunt Dorothy and Mr. Peterborough were conversing upon the varieties of Christian sects, and particularly such as approached nearest to Anglicanism, together with the strange, saddening fact that the Christian religion appeared to be more divided than, Peterborough regretted to say, the forms of idolatry established by the Buddha, Mahomet, and other impostors. He claimed the audacious merit for us, that we did not discard the reason of man we admitted man"s finite reason to our school of faith, and it was found refractory. Hence our many divisions.
"The Roman Catholics admit reason?" said Janet, who had too strong a turn for showing her keenness in little encounters with Peterborough.
"No," said he; "the Protestants." And, anxious to elude her, he pressed on to enchain my aunt Dorothy"s attention. Janet plagued him meanwhile; and I helped her. We ran him and his schoolboy, the finite refractory, up and down, until Peterborough was glad to abandon him, and Janet said, "Did you preach to the Germans much?" He had officiated in Prince Ernest"s private chapel: not, he added in his egregious modesty, not that he personally wished to officiate.
"It was Harry"s wish?" Janet said, smiling.
"My post of tutor," Peterborough hastened to explain, "was almost entirely supernumerary. The circ.u.mstances being so, I the more readily acquiesced in the t.i.tle of private chaplain, prepared to fulfil such duties as devolved upon me in that capacity, and acting thereon I proffered my occasional services. Lutheranism and Anglicanism are not, doubtless you are aware, divided on the broader bases. We are common Protestants. The Papacy, I can a.s.sure you, finds as little favour with one as with the other. Yes, I held forth, as you would say, from time to time. My a.s.sumption of the t.i.tle of private chaplain, it was thought, improved the family dignity--that is, on our side."
"Thought by Harry?" said Janet; and my aunt Dorothy said, "You and Harry had a consultation about it?"
"Wanted to appear as grand as they could," quoth the squire.
Peterborough signified an a.s.sent, designed to modify the implication.
"Not beyond due bounds, I trust, sir."
"Oh! now I understand," Janet broke out in the falsetto notes of a puzzle solved in the mind. "It was his father! Harry proclaiming his private chaplain!"
"Mr. Harry"s father did first suggest--" said Peterborough, but her quickly-altered features caused him to draw in his breath, as she had done after one short laugh.
My grandfather turned a round side-eye on me, hard as a c.o.c.k"s.
Janet immediately started topics to fill Peterborough"s mouth: the weather, the walk to church, the probable preacher. "And, grandada,"
said she to the squire, who was muttering ominously with a grim under-jaw, "His private chaplain!" and for this once would not hear her, "Grandada, I shall drive you over to see papa this afternoon."
She talked as if nothing had gone wrong. Peterborough, criminal red, attacked a jam-pot for a diversion. "Such sweets are rare indeed on the Continent," he observed to my aunt Dorothy. "Our homemade dainties are matchless."
"Private chaplain!" the squire growled again.
"It"s you that preach this afternoon," Janet said to Peterborough. "Do you give us an extempore sermon?"
"You remind me, Miss Ilchester, I must look to it; I have a little tr.i.m.m.i.n.g to do."
Peterborough thought he might escape, but the squire arrested him.
"You"ll give me five minutes before you"re out of the house, please. D"
ye smoke on Sundays?"
"Not on Sundays, sir," said Peterborough, openly and cordially, as to signify that they were of one mind regarding the perniciousness of Sunday smoking.
"See you don"t set fire to my ricks with your foreign chaplain"s tricks. I spied you puffing behind one t" other day. There," the squire dispersed Peterborough"s unnecessary air of abstruse recollection, "don"t look as though you were trying to hit on a pin"s head in a bushel of oats. Don"t set my ricks on fire--that "s all."
"Mr. Peterborough," my aunt Dorothy interposed her voice to soften this rough treatment of him with the offer of some hot-house flowers for his sitting-room.
"Oh, I thank you!" I heard the garlanded victim lowing as I left him to the squire"s mercy.
Janet followed me out. "It was my fault, Harry. You won"t blame him, I know. But will he fib? I don"t think he"s capable of it, and I"m sure he can"t run and double. Grandada will have him fast before a minute is over."
I told her to lose no time in going and extracting the squire"s promise that Peterborough should have his living,--so much it seemed possible to save.
She flew back, and in Peterborough"s momentary absence, did her work.
Nothing could save the unhappy gentleman from a distracting scene and much archaic English. The squire"s power of vituperation was notorious: he could be more than a match for roadside navvies and predatory tramps in cogency of epithet. Peterborough came to me drenched, and wailing that he had never heard such language,--never dreamed of it. And to find himself the object of it!--and, worse, to be unable to conscientiously defend himself! The pain to him was in the conscience,--which is, like the spleen, a function whose uses are only to be understood in its derangement. He had eased his conscience to every question right out, and he rejoiced to me at the immense relief it gave him.
Conscientiously, he could not deny that he knew the squire"s objection to my being in my father"s society; and he had connived at it "for reasons, my dearest Harry, I can justify to G.o.d and man, but not--I had to confess as much--not, I grieve to say, to your grandfather. I attempted to do justice to the amiable qualities of the absent. In a moment I was a.s.sailed with epithets that... and not a word is to be got in when he is so violent. One has to make up one"s mind to act Andromeda, and let him be the sea-monster, as somebody has said; I forget the exact origin of the remark."
The squire certainly had a whole ocean at command. I strung myself to pa.s.s through the same performance. To my astonishment I went unchallenged. Janet vehemently a.s.serted that she had mollified the angry old man, who, however, was dark of visage, though his tongue kept silence. He was gruff over his wine-gla.s.s the blandishments of his favourite did not brighten him. From his point of view he had been treated vilely, and he was apparently inclined to nurse his rancour and keep my fortunes trembling in the balance. Under these circ.u.mstances it was impossible for me to despatch a letter to Ottilia, though I found that I could write one now, and I sat in my room writing all day,--most eloquent stuff it was. The shadow of misfortune restored the sense of my heroical situation, which my father had extinguished, and this unlocked the powers of speech. I wrote so admirably that my wretchedness could enjoy the fine millinery I decorated it in. Then to tear the n.o.ble composition to pieces was a bitter gratification. Ottilia"s station repelled and attracted me mysteriously. I could not separate her from it, nor keep my love of her from the contentions into which it threw me.
In vain I raved, "What is rank?" There was a magnet in it that could at least set me quivering and twisting, behaving like a man spellbound, as madly as any hero of the ballads under a wizard"s charm.
At last the squire relieved us. He fixed that side-cast c.o.c.k"s eye of his on me, and said, "Where "s your bankers" book, sir?"
I presumed that it was with my bankers, but did not suggest the possibility that my father might have it in his custody; for he had a cheque-book of his own, and regulated our accounts. Why not? I thought, and flushed somewhat defiantly. The money was mine.
"Any objection to my seeing that book?" said the squire.
"None whatever, sir."
He nodded. I made it a point of honour to write for the book to be sent down to me immediately.
The book arrived, and the squire handed it to me to break the cover, insisting, "You"re sure you wouldn"t rather not have me look at it?"
"Quite," I replied. The question of money was to me perfectly unimportant. I did not see a glimpse of danger in his perusing the list of my expenses.
""Cause I give you my word I know nothing about it now," he said.