When the dishes were cleared, Cole stood and filled his coffee mug from the freshly brewed pot. "I want to get out of these clothes. Can you meet me in my den in a few minutes?
It"s just past the stairs. I have some papers to go over with you."
Tara tensed. "Is everything all right?"
"More than all right. I just want to make sure everything is in order before I ask you to sign anything."
Of course. The bargain.
She relaxed. "Okay."
But her nervousness returned as she waited for him. She wiped her sweating palms on her jeans and fiddled with her ponytail. The den was very much him. Wood paneling on the walls, thick carpeting, a heavy oak desk, with a credenza that held enough electronic equipment that Tara was sure they could have launched a NASA expedition. The desk chair, the couch and the large armchair were upholstered in the soft leather she knew he preferred. The only pieces of artwork in the room were a Russell painting she knew he"d paid the earth for at a charity auction and a copy of the Remington bronze statue, Broncobuster. He"d tried and failed to get his hands on the original.
When Cole came in wearing sweat pants and a University of Texas T-shirt, her eyes widened. Oh, lord. How was she supposed to remain neutral, keep her mind on the reason she was there, when he dressed this way. She couldn"t help noticing the way the soft material clung to his narrow hips and emphasized the leanness of his body. Or the outline of a semi-erect c.o.c.k pushing against the fabric. Dark, curling hair just peeked over the neck of the shirt, the same masculine hair that dusted his corded arms and the backs of his strong-looking hands. His hair, wet from what was obviously a quick shower, looked even darker than usual and curled slightly at the nape of his neck. Delicious.
Get yourself under control before you make a mess of everything!
She swallowed, hard. This was not good.
"Sorry," he said stiffly, noticing her reaction. "I guess I dressed down a little too much. This is just what I"m used to throwing on when I get home."
"No, no, that"s fine. This is your house. You should wear whatever you want. I"m...just not used to seeing you so...casual."
For a moment, his eyes darkened even more. "Same here." Then he sat down at his desk, indicating Tara should take the armchair and handed her a folder and an envelope in front of him.
In the next few minutes, she was alternately stunned and amazed. The amount of money stated in the agreement was completely absurd. More than she could need, even with the financial demands of her father"s illness. She knew exactly how much money Alamo Construction took in and that Cole could well afford this, but it still bothered her.
Her eyes widened when she opened the envelope to find a thick wad of cash with a rubber band around it and bank signature cards.
"This is ridiculous," she said, when she could find her voice again. "I can"t possibly sign this."
"Too little?" he asked, frowning.
"Too much," she insisted.
He picked up a pen from the desk and rolled it in his fingers. "You"ve agreed to turn your life upside down and enter into this crazy agreement with me. There isn"t enough money to express my grat.i.tude. And you can"t know at this point what financial a.s.sistance your parents will need. So please don"t argue with me about the one thing I can provide in this arrangement, okay?"
Her pulse jumping at the enormity of what he was offering her, she finished the short doc.u.ment, reached for a pen and signed it.
"The signature cards, too," he prompted. "I opened an account, but it will have your new, that is, your married name. The cash is to tide you over until then."
"It could probably tide me over until next year!"
"Please, Tara, just allow me this," he pleaded.
"I guess this will work out okay," she told him. "I need to shop for Molly, anyway."
He frowned. "I also thought you might want to buy something new for the wedding." But he sounded as if the words were dredged up from six feet under.
She didn"t know what to say so she just nodded.
"Well, then."
Silence dropped like a cement wall.
"I spoke to my mother today. Needless to say, this was a shock to her. I thought I"d take Molly by in the morning and see if I can talk my mother into going to the mall with us."
"Whatever you think best."
Whatever I think best? Don"t you ever think about this?
"I grocery shopped today, but I really don"t know the kinds of things you eat. If you"ll give me a list I"ll make sure we have them."
"I"m not fussy. Anything is fine."
"Fine."
Something simmered between them that neither of them wanted to acknowledge.
Cole cleared his throat. "I"m sure you must be exhausted and ready for bed."
"Yes. I guess I am." She rose on legs not quite steady and pushed back her chair.
When he handed her the folder with her copies of everything, their hands brushed, and she almost jumped at the spark that pa.s.sed between them. She saw him pull his hand back and realized he"d felt it, too.
They stared at each other, the look a mixture of surprise, bewilderment and panic.
Oh, this is so not good. This stupid agreement isn"t twenty-four hours old and already I can feel trouble.
"G-Goodnight," she stammered, backing out of the room. She literally ran for the stairs and up to her room, dropping onto her bed and throwing her arm over her eyes. Her heart raced and her whole body felt flushed. Pulses she didn"t even know she had throbbed as if they were some animated neon sign.
Was this what happened when you didn"t have s.e.x for years? Hadn"t even wanted it?
She"d better get control of herself, or her business arrangement would turn into a disaster. The fact that Cole had reacted, too, only made things worse. How had she gotten herself into this?
Forcing herself to sit up, she dug her cell phone out of her purse and called her parents to give them the details of the wedding ceremony. That ought to get her heated urges under control, she thought.
Cole sat at his desk with his head in his hands.
You stupid s.h.i.t.
He was batting a thousand in his "How To f.u.c.k Up My Life" program. Hadn"t he learned a thing with Maggie? Of course, comparing her to Tara was like comparing h.e.l.l"s Kitchen to Park Avenue, but the end result was still the same. His d.i.c.k kept getting him in trouble.
s.e.x had been the farthest thing from his mind when he"d concocted this crazy scheme. It was one good reason why Tara had seemed the logical choice. Efficient well-groomed, s.e.xless Tara.
s.e.xless? Bull!
d.a.m.n Sean anyway. Ever since he"d rearranged Cole"s thinking about the woman, Cole couldn"t make his body behave. Definitely not his c.o.c.k. Well, he"d better figure out how, or he"d be in deeper s.h.i.t than he already was.
Tara opened her laptop and surfed the Internet, looking for information on the care and feeding of five-month-olds, but it seemed no two babies were alike. She"d have to wing it, at least until she could throw herself on her mother"s mercy and get some advice. She called Lindsey, who put Tara at ease at once. And her mother agreed at once to go shopping, but Tara knew she had an ulterior motive and prepared herself for what she knew would be a not-so-subtle interrogation. Finally she showered and pulled a robe on over her nightgown. Molly was sure to wake soon for a bottle, and she didn"t want to traipse around the house in a way that sent the wrong signals to Cole.
Actually, they"re the right signals, but I"d better shut them down. Fast.
At eleven, Molly woke, making little noises in her crib. Tara managed to get down to the kitchen, heat a bottle and be back in her room without running into Cole. She peeked down the hall and saw the den was dark, and when she pa.s.sed his room, heading back to hers, the door was shut with a faint beam of light shining out beneath it. Was he in there reading? Thinking?
Regretting the bargain? Pushing the thoughts from her mind, she fed Molly, rocking her to sleep before slipping back into her own bed.
Even as tired as she was, she had trouble falling asleep. The major changes in her life had her mind in turmoil. Applying for the license and buying the rings felt as if they"d happened to someone else. And of course, overriding everything was this unexpected and increasing s.e.xual attraction to Cole. She closed her eyes, and immediately Cole"s face swam before her.
"You"re so beautiful." In her dream, he was lying beside her, his hand mapping her body with gentle strokes. "I love your nipples, the way they feel when I put my lips around them."
She felt the familiar flutters in her p.u.s.s.y, the surge of liquid inside the swollen, pink folds.
His fingers danced through the curls surrounding her s.e.x then dipped into her slit, finally probing at the entrance to her wet channel.
"Spread your legs for me." His voice was hoa.r.s.e, thick with l.u.s.t.
She complied, but at the same time reached for his shaft, its thickness burning against her thigh. When she wrapped her fingers around its length, his breath hissed through his teeth.
"Do that too much, and we"ll be over before we start."
She slowly slid her fingers from root to tip then raised her hand and moved it across his chest. She loved the soft feel of the fine hair covering his hard muscles, and she twisted her fingers through it.
"You feel so good," she murmured, heat building inside her like a fire spiraling out of control.
"So do you. And you taste good, too."
He shifted his position and dipped his head between her thighs, his tongue lapping the trail his fingers had traced on her slit. When he reached her c.l.i.t and rasped back and forth across the tip, her body began to shake with need. He teased her with his tongue, tormented her, while one hand reached for a breast and fingers lightly pinched a nipple.
Her o.r.g.a.s.m gathered deep inside her, and she pushed at his head.
"Inside me," she whispered. "I want you inside me."
He gave her c.u.n.t one last lick then reached for the condom on the bedside table.
Sheathing himself, he moved into position, lifted her with his hands and plunged inside her with a swift stroke. The first flutters of o.r.g.a.s.m clutched at him, drawing him deeper inside her. Tara wound her legs around him, locking them at the base of his spine and arching herself to ride his pulsing c.o.c.k.
"I can"t last." His breathing was harsh, uneven.
"I"m there." She moaned his name.
His eyes, dark with l.u.s.t, bored into hers. "Now, Tara. Now."
He thrust one last time, a powerful movement, and they exploded together, shudders racking her as his body stiffened. She felt him spurt through the thin latex sheath and pressed his rigid body harder against her.
He rode her through the aftershocks, gasping for breath himself and...
Tara sat up in bed, heart racing. Once again she"d fallen into an erotic dream. Her body was covered with perspiration, her hand again between her legs. Panicked, she leaped out of bed and raced for the bathroom, turning the shower on and stepping into it. As she let the cool spray beat down on her body, she was thankful she"d closed her door. In her own home, she slept with it open, but here, she wanted the privacy. She could just imagine Cole"s reaction if he stumbled on her little performance. The bargain would be ended before it even began.
Chapter Five.
Cole was gone when Molly"s cooing noises drifting in from the nursery to wake Tara the next morning. Even though it was only six, she worried about running into him in the kitchen, but he must have been up at dawn and left the house. There was no sound of anyone in the house, his bedroom door was slightly ajar, and when she checked the garage, his car was gone.
Was he running away, escaping the confines of their situation? Did he have buyer"s remorse? In any event, she felt relief, unsure if she could face him without the remnants of last night"s dream showing on her face.
Back upstairs, she lifted the little girl from her crib.
"Oh, sweetheart, you are such a love," she said, nuzzling her cheek against the baby"s soft skin. The pain she"d lived with for so long shifted, fading in the warmth of the tiny child she cradled.
Molly blinked at her and gave her a drooling smile.
Tara hugged her tightly. Already she felt a sense of possession. After she"d changed and fed Molly then put her back in her crib, she called her mother.
"I need help," she confessed. "I have absolutely no idea what Molly"s schedule is, and I have to shop for her, too. There seems to have been some...miscommunication about what she needs."
And isn"t that an interesting way to put it. "I"m kind of winging it," she went on. "But she just had a bottle so she"ll probably sleep for a couple of hours."
"You can figure she"ll be up by ten," Irene said. "I"m more than happy to help with the shopping."
"Thank you," Tara breathed, relieved.
"Feed her then come pick me up. Bring another bottle for backup, just in case. If you leave as soon as she"s fed, we should be able to get enough done before she has to go down for her afternoon nap."
After she hung up, Tara wandered through the house, exploring the place that was now her home. Although well designed and beautifully decorated, the atmosphere had a sterile quality with no personal objects of any kind anywhere, no hint that a child lived within its walls, or even a memory of Maggie. The house was wiped clean of her existence.
Tara frowned, wondering if she could find a way to ask Cole about this. She had no idea yet what topic was forbidden and what wasn"t.
Back upstairs, she peeked into Cole"s room, noting the bed hadn"t been made and she chastised herself for it. Of course, she should have checked this morning. Tomorrow, she would remember to take care of it.
While Molly napped, she made her own bed, showered and dressed in slacks and a short-sleeved sweater and fixed herself a cup of coffee. Sitting at the kitchen table, sipping from the mug, she stared through one of the big windows at the peaceful scene outside and wondered for the thousandth time if she"d just made the biggest mistake of her life. A week from today, she"d Mrs. Cole Ca.s.sidy. She would be able to ease some of the financial strain on her parents and, for once in her life, have no worries on that score herself.
And she"d have a child to love and care for, to watch grow into a young woman. Was it a fair enough trade? And could she fulfill her role for what seemed like an endless stretch of years?
What about the growing attraction to Cole? Would she be able to hide her feelings indefinitely?
Her stomach cramping as tension rolled over her, she dumped the rest of her coffee and rinsed the mug. Time to put all of that out of her mind. She could do this. She could. And she would.