"If he is Ralph Scammel, he is a bad man! Peg says so, and Peg is always right!" And then again, with renewed anguish: "Oh, but it can"t be true, I know it can"t."
"If you have that much faith in him," said Mr. Shawyer quickly, "you must be content to wait till he comes back and ask him yourself. Now, take my advice and go home, and you will find that already your mother has repented of her hasty words."
Faith shook her head.
"I don"t think so," she said slowly. She knew her mother well in many ways, and she knew the bitter and relentless hatred with which Mrs.
Ledley had always regarded the "bad man," as the twins called him.
He had robbed her of all happiness. He had brought her and her children down to poverty. Faith did not think that her mother would ever relent or forgive.
She went home with dragging steps. Before she entered the house she slipped off her wedding ring and put it into a pocket. She felt more free without it, could almost imagine that the whole thing was nothing more, than a bad dream.
She was afraid to face her mother. She went up to her own little room on the top floor and sat down at the window.
There was not much to be seen from it but roofs and telegraph poles and wires, but the sky was blue beyond them all, and against her will Faith thought of the sea, which she had only seen once, years ago, and of Nicholas Forrester, who was even then being carried away from her across its blueness.
Since he said good-bye to her she had many times wished him back again, but now the thought of him made her shiver. She wished never to see him any more.
In her childishness she somehow fancied that she had only to say she regretted her marriage and give back everything he had ever given her to wipe the episode out of her life. She was thankful now that she had not spent a shilling of his money. She took it all from its hiding place and made a little parcel of it, with her wedding ring, and addressed it to the flat where he had taken her for lunch after their marriage.
He would find it when he came back and understand, she thought. She slipped out and posted it at once, for fear she should be tempted to change her mind by the sight of the twins" shabby frocks and the memory of all she could have bought them with the Beggar Man"s money.
Then she went into the kitchen to her mother and held out her trembling bare left hand.
"I"ve sent it back," she said in a whisper. "And the money--I never want to see him any more."
Mrs. Ledley stared at her helplessly, then something in the girl"s face, its immature look and innocent eyes, swept the anger and bitterness from her heart.
She took Faith on to her lap as if she had still been a child, and the two kissed and cried together.
Mrs. Ledley did not believe Faith would ever see the Beggar Man again.
She thought she knew only too well the type of man he was. She sobbed out that she was only too thankful to have her daughter safely with her.
"I didn"t mean to be hard and cruel," she said over and over again. "It would have broken my heart if he had taken you away from me."
"He wanted me to go and I wouldn"t," Faith said. She tried to believe that she was quite happy cuddled into her mother"s arms, but she knew that she was not. There was something old and sad in her heart which would never leave her again she knew. She listened apathetically while Mrs. Ledley spoke of her husband.
"You haven"t forgotten him, Faith? You haven"t so soon forgotten your father? He was so good to you. He loved you all so much. This man ruined him and caused his death. I know that my little girl could not love such a man."
"I wanted you to be rich," Faith whispered brokenly. "I wanted everything for you and the twins."
She sat up with sudden energy, pushing the dark hair from her face. "I hope I never see him again!" she said fiercely. "I hope he never comes home any more!..."
CHAPTER VI
Faith went back to the factory the next day and asked to be taken on again. Miss Dell would like to have refused, but she met Peg"s fierce eyes across the room and changed her mind, and Faith was reinstated.
There was not much time for talking that morning. There was a rush of work on hand and hardly a moment to spare, but during the dinner hour Peg asked a storm of questions.
"What has happened? He"s not coming back, of course! What a brute!
Didn"t I always say he was a brute?"
Faith shivered.
There were moments when she still clung pa.s.sionately to the hope that there was some mistake--that when he came back he would be able to explain and put matters right. And there were other times when she shrank from the very thought of him, and only wished to be able to forget those few days of delirium.
She would not even confide in Peg. All she would do was to beg her to ask no questions.
"It"s all over and done with," she said tremblingly. "You said he would not come back. I hope he never will."
"I said I should not be at all surprised if he didn"t," Peg answered.
"But, of course, he may do. Sometimes in novelettes the villain of the story turns out to be the hero after all, you know."
Faith did not think it was at all likely in this case, and the days began slowly to creep away.
When a fortnight had gone and the seventeenth day drew near, panic closed about her heart. Supposing he came after all?
She had had no word from him, and she hardly knew whether to be glad or sorry. Perhaps it meant that he never would come back. She wished she could believe this.
At other times, lying awake at night in her little room with its sloping roof, against her will she was forced to remember every word the Beggar Man had said to her, every kindly action that he had done, and there was always a great unanswered question in her mind.
"Why did he marry me if he was bad, as they say he is? He need not have married me. There are heaps of other girls in the world."
Mr. Shawyer wrote and begged her to go and see him, but she neither went nor answered the letter.
She spent as much of her time with Peg as possible, and the elder girl once more resumed her role of friend and protector.
"If you"re worrying about that good-for-nothing!" she said to Faith one day in her blunt manner, "you"re a little fool. There are as good fish in the sea as any that were caught, my girl, and don"t you make any mistake. Let old Scammel stay in America. Jolly good riddance, I say!"
Faith did not answer, but her nerves were tearing her to pieces. Every time a man"s voice sounded in the pa.s.sages of the factory or a door opened suddenly she was sure it was the Beggar Man come back to find and claim her. Every time she heard the sound of a motor coming up the street her heart beat so fast she could hardly breathe. She never knew how she dragged through the seventeenth day, but it pa.s.sed somehow, and the eighteenth and nineteenth and twentieth, and still there was no sign of Nicholas Forrester.
She began to pluck up courage. He would not come now, she was sure. If he had returned to England he had found her wedding ring and the returned money and had understood what she meant. Perhaps even he had repented as much as she, long before he got back home.
Or perhaps he was still abroad! That would be best of all, if she could only be sure that the sea was still dividing them.
Five days after Nicholas was due to return Mrs. Ledley spoke of him.
"He"ll never come back, Faith." There was triumphant thankfulness in her voice. "Somehow I felt all along that he would never come back."
Faith could not answer. Though her fear had decreased it was not yet dead, and only last night she had dreamed of the Beggar Man, dreamed that she was on one side of a locked door on which he knocked, knocked ceaselessly. It was early evening, and Faith had come home from work to find Mrs. Ledley dressed to go out.
"You won"t be long, mother, will you?" she urged. She dreaded being alone in the house. Though it was early evening, the twins were in bed and asleep, and everything seemed very still.
"I shan"t be long," her mother answered, "but I must have a breath of air. The house has stifled me all day. I can"t breathe at all sometimes."