Oh that my soul were new moulded, and I were effectually called a second time, and made a vessel full of the Spirit, to tell only of Jesus and his love! I fear I shall never be in this world what I desire. I have preached three times here; a few tears also have been shed. Oh for Whitfield"s week in London, when a thousand letters came! The same Jesus reigns; the same Spirit is able. Why is He restrained? Is the sin ours? Are we the bottle-stoppers of these heavenly dews? Ever yours till glory.
"_P.S._--We shall meet, G.o.d willing, at the Convocation."
The memorable Convocation met at Edinburgh on November 17th. There were five hundred ministers present from all parts of Scotland. The encroachment of the civil courts upon the prerogatives of Christ, the only Head acknowledged by our church, and the negligent treatment hitherto given by the legislature of the country to every remonstrance on the part of the church, had brought on a crisis. The Church of Scotland had maintained, from the days of the Reformation, that her connection with the State was understood to imply no surrender whatsoever of complete independence in regulating all spiritual matters; and to have allowed any civil authority to control her in doctrine, discipline, or any spiritual act, would have been a daring and flagrant act of treachery to her Lord and King. The deliberations of the Convocation continued during eight days, and the momentous results are well known in this land.
Mr. M"Cheyne was never absent from any of the diets of this solemn a.s.sembly. He felt the deepest interest in every matter that came before them, got great light as to the path of duty in the course of the consultations, and put his name to all the resolutions, heartily sympathizing in the decided determination that, as a church of Christ, we must abandon our connection with the State, if our "Claim of Rights" were rejected. These eight days were times of remarkable union and prayerfulness. The proceedings, from time to time, were suspended till the brethren had again asked counsel of the Lord by prayer; and none present will forget the affecting solemnity with which, on one occasion, Mr. M"Cheyne poured out our wants before the Lord.
He had a decided abhorrence of Erastianism. When the question was put to him, "Is it our duty to refuse ordination to any one who holds the views of Erastianism?" he replied,--"Certainly, whatever be his other qualifications." He was ever a thorough Presbyterian, and used to maintain the necessity of abolishing lay patronage, because,--1st, It was not to be found in the word of G.o.d; 2nd, It destroyed the duty of "trying the spirits;" 3rd, It meddled with the headship of Christ, coming in between Him and his people, saying, "I will place the stars." But still more decided was he in regard to the spiritual independence of the church. This he reckoned a vital question: and in prospect of the disruption of the Church of Scotland, if it were denied, he stated at a public meeting,--1st, That it was to be deplored in some respects, viz., because of the sufferings of G.o.d"s faithful servants, the degradation of those who remained behind, the alienation of the aristocracy, the perdition of the unG.o.dly, and the sin of the nation. But, 2nd, It was to be hailed for other reasons, viz., Christ"s kingly offices would be better known, the truth would be spread into desolate parishes, and faithful ministers would be refined. And when, on March 7th of the following year, the cause of the church was finally to be pleaded at the bar of the House of Commons, I find him writing: "Eventful night this in the British Parliament! Once more King Jesus stands at an earthly tribunal, and they know Him not!"
An interesting anecdote is related of him by a co-presbyter, who returned with him to Dundee after the Convocation. This co-presbyter, Mr. Stewart, was conversing with him as to what it might be their duty to do in the event of the disruption, and where they might be scattered. Mr. Stewart said he could preach Gaelic, and might go to the Highlanders in Canada, if it were needful. Mr. M"Cheyne said, "I think of going to the many thousand convicts that are transported beyond seas, for no man careth for their souls."
We have not many records of his public work after this date. Almost the last note in his diary is dated December 25: "This day ordained four elders, and admitted a fifth, who will all, I trust, be a blessing in this place when I am gone. Was graciously awakened a great while before day, and had two hours alone with G.o.d. Preached with much comfort on I Tim. 5:17, "Let the elders that rule well," etc. At the end of the sermon and prayer, proposed the regular questions; then made the congregation sing standing; during which time I came down from the pulpit and stood over the four men, then prayed, and all the elders gave the right hand of fellowship, during which I returned to the pulpit, and addressed them and the congregation on their relative duties. Altogether a solemn scene."
The last recorded cases of awakening, and the last entry in his diary, is dated January 6, 1843: "Heard of an awakened soul finding rest--true rest, I trust. Two new cases of awakening; both very deep and touching. At the very time when I was beginning to give up in despair, G.o.d gives me tokens of his presence returning."
He here speaks of discouragement, when G.o.d for a few months or weeks seemed to be withholding his hand from saving souls. If he was not right in thus hastily forgetting the past for a little, still this feature of his ministry is to be well considered. He entertained so full a persuasion that a faithful minister has every reason to expect to see souls converted under him, that when this was withheld, he began to fear that some hidden evil was provoking the Lord and grieving the Spirit. And ought it not to be so with all of us? Ought we not to suspect, either that we are not living near to G.o.d, or that our message is not a true transcript of the glad tidings, in both matter and manner, when we see no souls brought to Jesus? G.o.d may certainly hide from our knowledge much of what He accomplishes by our means, but as certainly will He bring to our view some seals of our ministry, in order that our persuasion of being thus sent by Him may solemnize and overawe us, as well as lead us on to unwearied labor.
Ought it not to be the inscription over the doors of our a.s.sembly and College halls: "_Thanks be unto G.o.d, which always causeth us to triumph in Christ, and maketh manifest the savour of his knowledge by us in every place?_" II Cor. 2:14.
About this time, in one of his MSS., there occurs this sentence: "As I was walking in the fields, the thought came over me with almost overwhelming power, that every one of my flock must soon be in heaven or h.e.l.l. Oh, how I wished that I had a tongue like thunder, that I might make all hear; or that I had a frame like iron, that I might visit every one, and say, "Escape for thy life!" Ah, sinners! you little know how I fear that you will lay the blame of your d.a.m.nation at my door."
He was never satisfied with his own attainments in holiness; he was ever ready to learn, and quick to apply, any suggestion that might tend to his greater usefulness. About this period he used to sing a psalm or hymn every day after dinner. It was often, "The Lord"s my shepherd," etc.; or, "Oh may we stand before the Lamb!" etc. Sometimes it was that hymn, _Oh for a closer walk with G.o.d!_ and sometimes the psalm, "Oh that I like a dove had wings!" etc. A friend said of him.
"I have sometimes compared him to the silver and graceful ash, with its pensile branches, and leaves of gentle green, reflecting gleams of happy sunshine. The fall of its leaf, too, is like the fall of his,--it is green to-night and gone to-morrow, it does not sere nor wither."
An experienced servant of G.o.d has said, that, while popularity is a snare that few are not caught by, a more subtle and dangerous snare is to be _famed for holiness_. The fame of being a G.o.dly man is as great a snare as the fame of being learned or eloquent. It is possible to attend with scrupulous anxiety even to secret habits of devotion, in order to get a name for holiness.[20] If any were exposed to this snare in his day, Mr. M"Cheyne was the person. Yet nothing is more certain than that, to the very last, he was ever discovering, and successfully resisting, the deceitful tendencies of his own heart and a tempting devil. Two things he seems never to have ceased from,--the cultivation of personal holiness, and the most anxious efforts to save souls.
[20] How true, yet awful, is the language of Dr Owen (quoted in Bridges" _Christian Ministry_, p. 168), "He that would go down to the pit in peace, let him obtain a great repute for religion; let him preach and labour to make other better than he is himself, and in the meantime neglect to humble his heart, to walk with G.o.d in manifest holiness and usefulness, and he will not fail of his end."
About this time he wrote down, for his own use, an examination into things that ought to be amended and changed. I subjoin it entire. How singularly close and impartial are these researches into his soul! How acute is he in discovering his variations from the holy law of G.o.d! Oh that we all were taught by the same spirit thus to try our reins! It is only when we are thus thoroughly experiencing our helplessness, and discovering the thousand forms of indwelling sin, that we really sit as disciples at Christ"s feet, and gladly receive Him as all in all!
And at each such moment we feel in the spirit of Ignatius, "[Greek: Nyn gar archen echo tou matheteuesthai]"--"It is only now that I begin to be a disciple."
Mr. M"Cheyne ent.i.tles the examination of his heart and life _"Reformation"_ and it commences thus:--
"It is the duty of ministers in this day to begin the reformation of religion and manners with themselves, families, etc., with confession of past sin, earnest prayer for direction, grace, and full purpose of heart. Mal. 3:3--"He shall purify the sons of Levi." Ministers are probably laid aside for a time for this very purpose.
"1. _Personal Reformation._
"I am persuaded that I shall obtain the highest amount of present happiness, I shall do most for G.o.d"s glory and the good of man, and I shall have the fullest reward in eternity, by maintaining a conscience always washed in Christ"s blood, by being filled with the Holy Spirit at all times, and by attaining the most entire likeness to Christ in mind, will, and heart, that is possible for a redeemed sinner to attain to in this world.
"I am persuaded that whenever any one from without, or my own heart from within, at any moment, or in any circ.u.mstances, contradicts this,--if any one shall insinuate that it is not for my present and eternal happiness, and for G.o.d"s glory and my usefulness, to maintain a blood-washed conscience, to be entirely filled with the Spirit, and to be fully conformed to the image of Christ in all things,--that is the voice of the devil, G.o.d"s enemy, the enemy of my soul and of all good--the most foolish, wicked, and miserable of all the creatures. See Prov. 9:17--"Stolen waters are sweet."
"1. _To maintain a conscience void of offence_, I am persuaded that I ought to confess my sins more. I think I ought to confess sin the moment I see it to be sin; whether I am in company, or in study, or even preaching, the soul ought to cast a glance of abhorrence at the sin. If I go on with the duty, leaving the sin unconfessed, I go on with a burdened conscience, and add sin to sin. I think I ought at certain times of the day--my best times,--say, after breakfast and after tea,--to confess solemnly the sins of the previous hours, and to seek their complete remission.
"I find that the devil often makes use of the confession of sin to stir up again the very sin confessed into new exercise, so that I am afraid to dwell upon the confession. I must ask experienced Christians about this. For the present, I think I should strive against this awful abuse of confession, whereby the devil seeks to frighten me away from confessing. I ought to take all methods for seeing the vileness of my sins. I ought to regard myself as a condemned branch of Adam,--as partaker of a nature opposite to G.o.d from the womb (Ps. 51.),--as having a heart full of all wickedness, which pollutes every thought, word, and action, during my whole life, from birth to death. I ought to confess often the sins of my youth, like David and Paul,--my sins before conversion, my sins since conversion,--sins against light and knowledge, against love and grace, against each person of the G.o.dhead. I ought to look at my sins in the light of the holy law, in the light of G.o.d"s countenance, in the light of the cross, in the light of the judgment-seat, in the light of h.e.l.l, in the light of eternity. I ought to examine my dreams--my floating thoughts--my predilections--my often recurring actions--my habits of thought, feeling, speech, and action--the slanders of my enemies and the reproofs, and even banterings, of my friends--to find out traces of my prevailing sin, matter for confession. I ought to have a stated day of confession, with fasting--say, once a month. I ought to have a number of scriptures marked, to bring sin to remembrance. I ought to make use of all bodily affliction, domestic trial, frowns of providence on myself, house, parish, church, or country, as calls from G.o.d to confess sin. The sins and afflictions of other men should call me to the same. I ought, on Sabbath evenings, and on Communion Sabbath evenings, to be especially careful to confess the sins of holy things. I ought to confess the sins of my confessions,--their imperfections, sinful aims, self-righteous tendency, etc.,--and to look to Christ as having confessed my sins perfectly over his own sacrifice.
"I ought to go to Christ for the forgiveness of each sin. In washing my body, I go over every spot, and wash it out. Should I be less careful in washing my soul? I ought to see the stripe that was made on the back of Jesus by each of my sins. I ought to see the infinite pang thrill through the soul of Jesus equal to an eternity of my h.e.l.l for my sins, and for all of them. I ought to see that in Christ"s bloodshedding there is an infinite over-payment for all my sins. Although Christ did not suffer more than infinite justice demanded, yet He could not suffer at all without laying down an infinite ransom.
"I feel, when I have sinned, an immediate reluctance to go to Christ. I am ashamed to go. I feel as if it would do no good to go,--as if it were making Christ a minister of sin, to go straight from the swine-trough to the best robe,--and a thousand other excuses; but I am persuaded they are all lies, direct from h.e.l.l. John argues the opposite way: "If any man sin, we have an advocate with the Father;" Jer. 3:1 and a thousand other scriptures are against it. I am sure there is neither peace nor safety from deeper sin, but in going directly to the Lord Jesus Christ. This is G.o.d"s way of peace and holiness. It is folly to the world and the beclouded heart, but it is _the way_.
"I must never think a sin too small to need immediate application to the blood of Christ. If I put away a good conscience, concerning faith I make shipwreck. I must never think my sins too great, too aggravated, too presumptuous,--as when done on my knees, or in preaching, or by a dying bed, or during dangerous illness,--to hinder me from fleeing to Christ.
The weight of my sins should act like the weight of a clock: the heavier it is, it makes it go the faster.
"I must not only wash in Christ"s blood, but clothe me in Christ"s obedience. For every sin of omission in self, I may find a divinely perfect obedience ready for me in Christ. For every sin of commission in self, I may find not only a stripe or a wound in Christ, but also a perfect rendering of the opposite obedience in my place, so that the law is magnified, its curse more than carried, its demand more than answered.
"Often the doctrine of _Christ for me_ appears common, well known, having nothing new in it; and I am tempted to pa.s.s it by and go to some scripture more taking. This is the devil again,--a red-hot lie. _Christ for us_ is ever new, ever glorious. "Unsearchable riches of Christ,"--an infinite object, and the only one for a guilty soul. I ought to have a number of scriptures ready, which lead my blind soul directly to Christ, such as Isaiah 45, Rom. 3.
"2. _To be filled with the Holy Spirit_, I am persuaded that I ought to study more my own weakness. I ought to have a number of scriptures ready to be meditated on, such as Rom. 7, John 15, to convince me that I am a helpless worm.
"I am tempted to think that I am now an established Christian,--that I have overcome this or that l.u.s.t so long,--that I have got into the habit of the opposite grace,--so that there is no fear; I may venture very near the temptation--nearer than other men. This is a lie of Satan. I might as well speak of gunpowder getting by habit a power of resisting fire, so as not to catch the spark. As long as powder is wet, it resists the spark; but when it becomes dry, it is ready to explode at the first touch. As long as the Spirit dwells in my heart He deadens me to sin, so that, if lawfully called through temptation, I may reckon upon G.o.d carrying me through. But when the Spirit leaves me, I am like dry gunpowder.
Oh for a sense of this!
"I am tempted to think that there are some sins for which I have no natural taste, such as strong drink, profane language, etc., so that I need not fear temptation to such sins. This is a lie,--a proud, presumptuous lie. The seeds of all sins, are in my heart, and perhaps all the more dangerously that I do not see them.
"I ought to pray and labor for the deepest sense of my utter weakness and helplessness that ever a sinner was brought to feel. I am helpless in respect of every l.u.s.t that ever was, or ever will be, in the human heart. I am a worm--a beast--before G.o.d. I often tremble to think that this is true. I feel as if it would not be safe for me to renounce all indwelling strength, as if it would be dangerous for me to feel (what is the truth) that there is nothing in me keeping me back from the grossest and vilest sin. This is a delusion of the devil. My only safety is to know, feel, and confess my helplessness, that I may hang upon the arm of Omnipotence ... I daily wish that sin had been rooted out of my heart. I say, "Why did G.o.d leave the root of lasciviousness, pride, anger, etc., in my bosom? He hates sin, and I hate it; why did He not take it clean away?" I know many answers to this which completely satisfy my judgment, but still I do not _feel_ satisfied. This is wrong. It is right to be weary of the being of sin, but not right to quarrel with my present "good fight of faith." ... The falls of professors into sin make me tremble. I have been driven away from prayer, and burdened in a fearful manner by hearing or seeing their sin.
This is wrong. It is right to tremble, and to make every sin of every professor a lesson of my own helplessness; but it should lead me the more to Christ ... If I were more deeply convinced of my utter helplessness, I think I would not be so alarmed when I hear of the falls of other men ... I should study those sins in which I am most helpless, in which pa.s.sion becomes like a whirlwind and I like a straw. No figure of speech can represent my utter want of power to resist the torrent of sin ... I ought to study Christ"s omnipotence more: Heb. 7:25, I Thess. 5:23, Rom. 6:14, Rom. 5:9, 10, and such scriptures, should be ever before me ... Paul"s thorn, II Cor. 12, is the experience of the greater part of my life. It should be ever before me ... There are many subsidiary methods of seeking deliverance from sins, which must not be neglected,--thus, marriage, I Cor. 7:2; fleeing, I Tim. 6:11, I Cor. 6:18; watch and pray, Matt. 26:41; the word, "It is written, It is written." So Christ defended himself; Matt. 4. ... But the main defence is casting myself into the arms of Christ like a helpless child, and beseeching Him to fill me with the Holy Spirit. "This is the victory that overcometh the world, even our faith," I John 5:4, 5,--a wonderful pa.s.sage.
"I ought to study Christ as a living Saviour more,--as a Shepherd, carrying the sheep He finds,--as a King, reigning in and over the souls He has redeemed,--as a Captain, fighting with those who fight with me, Ps. 35.,--as one who has engaged to bring me through all temptations and trials, however impossible to flesh and blood.
"I am often tempted to say, How can this Man save us? How can Christ in heaven deliver me from l.u.s.ts which I feel raging in me, and nets I feel enclosing me? This is the father of lies again! "He is able to save unto the uttermost."
"I ought to study Christ as an Intercessor. He prayed most for Peter, who was to be most tempted. I am on his breastplate. If I could hear Christ praying for me in the next room, I would not fear a million of enemies. Yet the distance makes no difference; He is praying for me.
"I ought to study the Comforter more,--his G.o.dhead, his love, his almightiness. I have found by experience that nothing sanctifies me so much as meditating on the Comforter, as John 14:16. And yet how seldom I do this! Satan keeps me from it. I am often like those men who said, They knew not if there be any Holy Ghost ... I ought never to forget that my body is dwelt in by the third Person of the G.o.dhead. The very thought of this should make me tremble to sin; I Cor. 6 ... I ought never to forget that sin grieves the Holy Spirit,--vexes and quenches Him ... If I would be filled with the Spirit, I feel I must read the Bible more, pray more, and watch more.
"3. _To gain entire likeness to Christ_, I ought to get a high esteem of the happiness of it. I am persuaded that G.o.d"s happiness is inseparably linked in with his holiness. Holiness and happiness are like light and heat. G.o.d never tasted one of the pleasures of sin.
"Christ had a body such as I have, yet He never tasted one of the pleasures of sin. The redeemed, through all eternity, will never taste one of the pleasures of sin; yet their happiness is complete. It would be my greatest happiness to be from this moment entirely like them. Every sin is something away from my greatest enjoyment ... The devil strives night and day to make me forget this or disbelieve it. He says, Why should you not enjoy this pleasure as much as Solomon or David? You may go to heaven also. I am persuaded that this is a lie,--that my true happiness is to go and sin no more.
"I ought not to delay parting with sins. Now is G.o.d"s time. "I made haste and delayed not." ... I ought not to spare sins because I have long allowed them as infirmities, and others would think it odd if I were to change all at once. What a wretched delusion of Satan that is!
"Whatever I see to be sin, I ought from this hour to set my whole soul against it, using all scriptural methods to mortify it, as the Scriptures, special prayer for the Spirit, fasting, watching.
"I ought to mark strictly the occasions when I have fallen, and avoid the occasion as much as the sin itself.
"Satan often tempts me to go as near to temptations as possible without committing the sin. This is fearful,--tempting G.o.d and grieving the Holy Ghost. It is a deep-laid plot of Satan.
"I ought to flee all temptation, according to Prov. 4:15--Avoid it, pa.s.s not by it, turn from it, and pa.s.s away." ... I ought constantly to pour out my heart to G.o.d, praying for entire conformity to Christ--for the whole law to be written on my heart ... I ought statedly and solemnly to give my heart to G.o.d--to surrender my all into his everlasting arms, according to the prayer, Ps. 31., "Into thine hand I commit my spirit,"--beseeching Him not to let any iniquity, secret or presumptuous, have dominion over me, and to fill me with every grace that is in Christ, in the highest degree that it is possible for redeemed sinner to receive it, and at all times, till death.
"I ought to meditate often on heaven as a world of holiness,--where all are holy, where the joy is holy joy, the work holy work; so that, without personal holiness, I never can be there ... I ought to avoid the appearance of evil. G.o.d commands me; and I find that Satan has a singular art in linking the appearance and reality together.
"I find that speaking of some sins defiles my mind and leads me into temptation; and I find that G.o.d forbids even saints to speak of the things that are done of them in secret. I ought to avoid this.
"Eve, Achan, David, all fell through the l.u.s.t of the eye. I should make a covenant with mine, and pray, "Turn away mine eyes from viewing vanity." ... Satan makes unconverted men like the deaf adder to the sound of the gospel. I should pray to be made deaf by the Holy Spirit to all that would tempt me to sin.
"One of my most frequent occasions of being led into temptation is this,--I say it is needful to my office that I listen to this, or look into this, or speak of this. So far this is true; yet I am sure Satan has his part in this argument. I should seek divine direction to settle how far it will be good for my ministry, and how far evil for my soul, that I may avoid the latter.
"I am persuaded that nothing is thriving in my soul unless it is growing. "Grow in grace." "Lord, increase our faith."
"Forgetting the things that are behind." ... I am persuaded that I ought to be inquiring at G.o.d and man what grace I want, and how I may become more like Christ ... I ought to strive for more purity, humility, meekness, patience under suffering, love.
"Make me Christ-like in all things," should be my constant prayer. "Fill me with the Holy Spirit."