"Unfortunately for your lordship, there are no professors to be had; but, as I said, it comes to the same thing. Engage a professor of religion, and whilst you pretend to study his doctrine, make a point also to study his life, and ten to one but you will close! your studies admirably qualified to take a degree in hypocrisy, if there were such an honor, and that you wish to imitate your teacher. Either that, my lord, or it may tend to cure you of a leaning toward hypocrisy as long as you live."
"Well, I wish I could make some progress in either one or the other, it matters not which, provided it be easier to learn, and more useful. We must think about it, Tom. You will remind me, of course. Was Sir George here to-day?"
"No, my lord, but he sent to inquire."
"Nor Lord Jockeyville?"
"He drove tandem to the door, but didn"t come in. The other members of our set have been tolerably regular in their inquiries, especially since they were undeceived as to the danger of your wound."
"By the way, Norton, that was a d----d cool fellow that pinked me; he did the thing in quite a self-possessed and gentlemanly way, too.
However it was my own fault; I forced him into it. You must know I had reason to suppose that he was endeavoring to injure me in a certain quarter; in short, that he had made some progress in the affections of Lucy Gourlay. I saw the attentions he paid to her at Paris, when I was sent to the right about. In short--but hang it--there--that will do--let us talk no more about it--I escaped narrowly--that is all."
"And I must leave you, my lord, for I a.s.sure you I have many things to attend to. Those creditors are unreasonable scoundrels, and must be put off with soft words and hard promises for some time longer. That Irish wine-merchant of yours, however, is a model to every one of his tribe."
"Ah, that is because he knows the old peer. Do you know, Tom, after all, I don"t think it so disreputable a thing to be termed a respectable old n.o.bleman; but still it indicates want of individual character. Now Tom, I think I have a character. I mean an original character. Don"t every one almost say--I allude, of course, to every one of sense and penetration--Dunroe"s a character--quite an original--an enigma--a sphinx--an inscription that cannot be deciphered--an illegible dog--eh--don"t they, Tom?"
"Not a doubt of it, my lord. Even I, who ought to know you so well, can make nothing of you."
"Well, but after all, Tom, my father"s name overshadows a great number of my venialities. Dunroe is wild, they say, but then he is the son of a most respectable old n.o.bleman; and so, many of them shrug and pity, when they would otherwise a.s.sail and blame."
"And I hope to live long enough to see you a most respectable old "character" yet, my dear Dunroe. I must go as your representative to these d-----d ravenous duns. But mark me, comport yourself in your father"s and sister"s presence as a young man somewhat meditating upon the reformation of his life, so that a favorable impression may be made here, and a favorable report reach the baronet"s fair daughter. _Au revoir_."
CHAPTER XX. Interview between Lords Cullamore, Dunroe, and Lady Emily
--Tom Norton"s Aristocracy fails Him--His Reception by Lord Cullamore.
At the hour appointed, Lord Dunroe"s father and sister arrived. The old peer, as his son usually, but not in the most reverential spirit, termed him, on entering his sleeping chamber, paused for a moment in the middle of the room, as if to ascertain his precise state of health; but his sister, Lady Emily, with all the warmth of a young and affectionate heart, pure as the morning dew-drop, ran to his bedside, and with tears in her eyes, stooped down and kissed him, exclaiming at the same time,
"My dear Dunroe; but no--I hate those cold and formal t.i.tles--they are for the world, but not for brother and sister. My dear John, how is your wound? Thank G.o.d, it is not dangerous, I hear. Are you better? Will you soon be able to rise? My dear brother, how I was alarmed on hearing it; but there is another kiss to help to cure you."
"My dear Emily, what the deuce are you about? I tell you I have a prejudice against kissing female relations. It is too tame, and somewhat of a bore, child, especially to a sick man."
His father now approached him with a grave, but by no means an unfeeling countenance, and extending his hand, said, "I fear, John, that this has been a foolish business; but I am glad to find that, so far as your personal danger was concerned, you have come off so safely. How do you find yourself?"
"Rapidly recovering, my lord, I thank you. At first they considered the thing serious; but the bullet only grazed the rib slightly, although the flesh wound was, for a time, troublesome enough. I am now, however, free from fever, and the wound is closing fast."
"Whilst this brief dialogue took place, Lady Emily sat on a chair by the bedside, her large, brilliant eyes no longer filled with tears, but open with astonishment, and we may as well add with pain, at the utter indifference with which her brother received her affectionate caresses.
After a few moments" reflection, however, her generous heart supposed it had discovered his apology.
"Ah," thought the sweet girl, "I had forgotten his wound, and of course I must have occasioned him great pain, which his delicacy placed to a different motive. He did not wish to let me know that I had hurt him." And her countenance again beamed with the joy of an innocent and unsuspecting spirit.
"But, Dunroe," she said--"John, I mean, won"t you soon be able to get up, and to walk about, or, at all events, to take an airing with us in the carriage? Will you not, dear John?"
"Yes, I hope so, Emily. By the way, Emily, you have grown quite a woman since I saw you last. It is now better than two years, I think, since then."
"How did you like the Continent, John?"
"Why, my dear girl, how is this? What sympathy can you feel with the experience of a young fellow like me on the Continent? When you know the world better, my dear girl, you will feel the impropriety of asking such a question. Pray be seated, my lord."
Lord Cullamore sat, as if unconsciously, in an arm-chair beside the table on which were placed his son"s dressings and medicines, and resting his head on his hand for a moment, as if suffering pain, at length raised it, and said,
"No, Dunroe; no. I trust my innocent girl will never live to feel the impropriety of asking a question so natural?"
"I"m sure I hope not, my lord, with all my heart," replied Dunroe. "Have you been presented, Emily? Have you been brought out?"
"She has been presented," said her father, "but not brought out; nor is it my intention, in the obvious sense of that word, that she ever shall."
"Oh, your lordship perhaps has a tendency to Popery, then, and there is a convent in the background? Is that it, my good lord?" he asked, smiling.
"No," replied his father, who could not help smiling in return, "not at all, John. Emily will not require to be brought out, nor paraded through the debasing formalities of fashion. She shall not be excluded from fashion, certainly; but neither shall I suffer her to run the vulgar gauntlet of heartless dissipation, which too often hardens, debases, and corrupts. But a truce to this; the subject is painful to me; let us change it."
The last observation of Dunroe to his sister startled her so much that she blushed deeply, and looked with that fascinating timidity which is ever a.s.sociated with innocence and purity from her brother to her father.
"Have I said anything wrong, papa?" she asked, when Lord Cullamore had ceased to speak.
"Nothing, my love, nothing, but precisely what was natural and right.
Dunroe"s reply, however, was neither the one nor the other, and he ought to have known it."
"Well now, Emily," said her brother, "I don"t regret it, inasmuch as it has enabled me to satisfy myself upon a point which I have frequently heard disputed--that is, whether a woman is capable of blushing or not.
Now I have seen you blush with my own eyes, Emily; nay, upon my honor, you blush again this moment."
"Dunroe," observed his father, "you are teasing your sister; forbear."
"But don"t you see, my lord," persisted his son, "the absolute necessity for giving her a course of fashionable life, if it were only to remove this const.i.tutional blemish. If it were discovered, she is ruined; to blush being, as your lordship knows, contrary to all the laws and statutes of fashion in that case made and provided."
"Dunroe," said his father, "I intend you shall spend part of the summer and all the autumn in Ireland, with us."
"Oh, yes, John, you must come," said his sister, clapping her snow-white hands in exultation at the thought. "It will be so delightful."
"Ireland!" exclaimed Dunroe, with well-feigned surprise; "pray where is that, my lord?"
"Come, come, John," said his father, smiling; "be serious."
"Ireland!" he again exclaimed; "oh, by the way, that"s an island, I think, in the Pacific--is it not?"
"No," replied his father; "a more inappropriate position you could not have possibly found for it."
"Is not that the happy country where the people live without food? Where they lead a life of independence, and starve in such an heroic spirit?"
"My dear Dunroe," said his father, seriously, "never sport with the miseries of a people, especially when that people are your own countrymen."
"My lord," he replied, disregarding the rebuke he had received, "for Heaven"s sake conceal that disgraceful fact. Remember, I am a young n.o.bleman; call me profligate--spendthrift--debauchee--anything you will but an Irishman. Don"t the Irish refuse beef and mutton, and take to eating each other? What can be said of a people who, to please their betters, practise starvation as their natural pastime, and dramatize hunger to pamper their most affectionate lords and masters, who, whilst the latter witness the comedy, make the performers pay for their tickets? And yet, although the cannibal system flourishes, I fear they find it anything but a Sandwich island."
"Papa," said Lady Emily, in a whisper, and with tears in her eyes, "I fear John"s head is a little unsettled by his illness."