"Well?"
"I"ve fed her up."
"Well?"
"She"s ate till she"s sick."
The Captain sent post-haste for Dr. Beckerleg.
"That woman"s green with bile," the Doctor announced. "You"ve been over-feeding her."
"I did it to strengthen the child."
"No doubt; but this sort of woman will eat all that"s put before her. Lower her diet."
This was done. The woman recovered in a couple of days and resigned her place at once, declaring she was starved.
A second wet-nurse was sought for and found. The child thrived, was weaned, and began to cut his teeth without any trouble to mention. Twice a day Captain Barker visited his nursery and studied him attentively.
"I"ll own that I"m boggled," he confessed to Dr. Beckerleg. "You see, a child is the offspring of his parents."
"That is undeniable!" the Doctor answered.
"And science now a.s.serts that he inherits his parents" apt.i.tudes: therefore, to train him secundum naturam, I must discover these apt.i.tudes and educate or check them."
"Decidedly."
"Well, but his mother was an angel, and his father the dirtiest scamp that ever cheated the halter."
"I should advise you to strike a mean. What of the child himself?"
"He does nothing but eat."
"It appears to me that, striking a mean between the two extremes you mention, we arrive at mere man. I perceive a great opportunity. Suppose you teach him exactly what Adam was taught."
"Gardening?"
"Precisely. He will start with some advantage over Adam, there being no Eve to complicate matters."
"He shall be taught gardening," the little Captain decided.
"The pursuit will accord well with his temperament, which is notably pacific. The child seldom or never cries. At the same time we cannot quite revert to the Garden of Eden. His life will, almost certainly, bring him more or less into contact with his fellow-men."
"We must expect that."
"Therefore, as a mere measure of precaution, it might be as well to instruct him in the use of the small-sword."
"I will look after that. There is nothing I shall enjoy more than teaching him-precaution. We have now, I think, settled everything-"
"By no means." The Doctor put a hand into his tail-pocket, and after some difficulty with the lining pulled out a small book bound in green leather and tied with a green ribbon. "Here," he announced, "is the first volume of a treatise on education."
"Plague take your books! You"re as bad as Jemmy, yonder. I tell you I"ll not addle the boy"s head with books."
"But this treatise has the advantage to be unwritten."
Dr. Beckerleg untied the ribbon, and holding out the book, turned over a score of pages. They were all blank.
"Undoubtedly that is an advantage. But then, it hardly seems to me to be a treatise."
"No: but it will be when you have written it."
"I?"
"Certainly, you intend to train Tristram in accordance with nature. On what do we base our knowledge of nature? On experiment and observation. For many reasons your experiments with the child must be limited; but you can observe him daily-hourly, if you like. In this volume you shall record your observations from day to day, nulla dies sine linea. It is the first present I make to him, as his G.o.dfather: and in doing so I set you down to write the most valuable book in the world, a complete History of a Human Creature."
Captain Barker took the volume.
"But I shall never live to finish it."
"We hope not. The beauty, however, of this history will be that at any point in its progress we may consult it for Tristram"s good, and learn all that, up to that point, G.o.d has given us eyes to see. It may be that in deciding to make him a gardener we have been mistaken. That book will enlighten us."
"There"s one blessing," said Captain Barker, tucking the book under his arm; "whatever pursuit the boy may follow, he"ll want to follow it unmolested. And therefore, in any case, I must teach him to use the small-sword."
During the first few months, almost every entry in the Captain"s green volume dealt with Tristram"s appet.i.te. Nor did this fluctuate enough to make the record exciting. He was a slow, phlegmatic infant, with red cheeks and an exuberant crop of yellow curls. He slept all night and a good third of the day, and, beyond cutting ten teeth in as many months, exhibited no precocity. Nothing troubled him, if we except an insatiable hunger. He was weaned with extreme difficulty, and even when promoted to bread and biscuits and milk puddings, continued to recognise his nurse"s past service and reward it with so sincere an affection that the woman accepted an increase of wage and cheerfully consented to stay on and take care of him.
Captain Barker saw nothing in all this to shake his first resolution of making the boy a gardener, but rather found in each successive day a reason the more for making haste to learn something about horticulture himself, in order that when the time came he might be able to teach it. At length he took counsel with Narcissus Swiggs and unfolded his desire.
Mr. Swiggs listened sleepily, and as soon as his master had done gave him a month"s notice.
"What the devil"s the use of that?" Captain Barker asked.
"I thought you weren"t satisfied, that"s all."
"If I weren"t, I should kick you out without half these words. You"ve been thinking of yourself all this while."
"I mostly does."
"Then don"t, while I"m talking." And Captain Barker explained his scheme a second time.
"No use," p.r.o.nounced Mr. Swiggs at the close, shaking his head ponderously.
"Why not?"
Mr. Swiggs swept his hand before him, summing up the whole landscape with one majestic semicircle.
"Where is your soil?" he asked. "And where is your water? Springs?"-he paused a couple of seconds-"There ain"t none. All that mortal man can do, I does."
"And what is that?"