"I promise," she answered, and her thin, white hand again clasped mine, and our lips met to seal our compact.
CHAPTER TWENTY TWO.
TO SEEK THE TRUTH.
The days of my love"s convalescence were happy indeed. Most of the time we spent together, planning the future and gossiping about the past.
Those were halcyon hours when we reckoned time only by the meals served to us by Simes, and we both looked forward to a visit to the old Lincolnshire town that was so very lethargic, so redolent of the "good old days" of our grandfathers.
Once she received a letter left by a man, and marked "private." In this I scented mystery; for she never referred to it, and when I inquired who was the sender she merely replied that a friend had written to her.
This was strange, for none knew that she remained with me. We had thought it best not to tell any one until all could be explained, for a lady who lives in a bachelor"s chambers is looked upon with some suspicion if no very valid excuse can be given for such a flagrant breach of the _convenances_.
The letter without doubt caused her much thought and considerable anxiety. By her face I detected that she was dreading some dire result, the nature of which she dared not tell me; and it was on that very afternoon that Jack Yelverton called to inquire after me, for I had neither written nor seen him since that night when the chalice at St Peter"s had disappeared into ashes.
He was stretched out in a chair smoking furiously, laughing more merrily than usual, and talking with that genuine _bonhomie_ which was one of his most engaging characteristics, when suddenly Muriel entered.
They met face to face, and in an instant she drew back, pale as death.
"I--I didn"t know you had a visitor," she exclaimed half-apologetically, her cheeks crimsoning in her confusion.
"Come in," I exclaimed, rising. "Allow me to introduce you," and I went through the conventional formality.
Upon Yelverton"s face I detected an expression of absolute wonder and bewilderment; but seeing that she treated him with calm indifference, he at once reseated himself, and the pair recovered their self-possession almost instantly.
Puzzled at this strange complication, I spoke mechanically, explaining that Muriel was engaged to marry me, and that she had been ill, although I did not tell him the cause.
Yet all Jack Yelverton"s levity had in that brief moment of unexpected meeting departed. He had become brooding and thoughtful.
I confess that I entertained doubts. So many things had recently occurred which she refused to explain, that day by day I was haunted by a horrible consuming suspicion that, after all, she did not love me-- that for some purpose of her own she was merely making shallow pretence.
I fear that the remainder of Yelverton"s visit was a dismal affair.
Certainly our conversation was irresponsible and disjointed, for neither of us thought of what we said. Our reflections were far from the subject under discussion.
At last the Vicar of St Peter"s made his adieux, and when he had gone I awaited in vain her explanation.
She said nothing, yet her efforts at concealment were so apparent that they nauseated me. I was annoyed that she should thus believe me to be one so blinded by love as to be unable to observe signs so palpable as those in her countenance. The more I thought it over, the more apparent it became that as Yelverton and Aline were lovers, Muriel, knowing Aline, would certainly be acquainted with him. If so, and all their dealings had been straightforward, why had not she at once welcomed him as a friend, and not as a stranger?
I saw that he was plainly annoyed at meeting her, and detected astonishment in his face when I announced my intention of marrying her.
I wondered why he looked at me so strangely. His expression was as though he pitied my ignorance. Thoughts such as these held me in doubt and suspicion.
With a self-control amazing in such circ.u.mstances, she reseated herself and took up some needlework, which she had that morning commenced--a cushion-cover intended for our home--and when at last I grew calm again and sat with her she commenced to chat as though our happiness had in no way been disturbed.
As the days went on and she rapidly grew stronger her att.i.tude became more and more puzzling. That she loved me pa.s.sionately with a fierce, all-consuming affection, I could not doubt. Not that she uttered many words of re-a.s.surance. On the contrary, she heard most of my declarations in silence. Yet the heaving of her breast, and that bright, truthful look in her eyes, were signs of love which I could not fail to recognise.
During those nine weeks of Muriel"s illness I heard nothing of Aline, and was wondering if she knew of my beloved"s presence, or if she would again visit me. To her I had bound myself by an oath of secrecy, in return for a gift to me more precious than any on earth, yet the many strange occurrences which had happened since that first night at the theatre formed a puzzle so intricate that the more I tried to discover the solution the more bewildering it became.
Soon the dark-haired fragile girl who was to be my wife had so improved in health that the doctor allowed her to go for a drive, and in the days following we went out together each afternoon perfectly happy and content in each other"s love. Those who have loved truly know well the ecstasy of the first hours in public with one"s betrothed, therefore it is unnecessary for me to describe my feeling of perfect bliss and thankfulness that she was well at last, and that ere long we should become man and wife.
It had been arranged that Muriel should leave for Stamford in two or three days, when one morning, she having gone out with the nurse, and I remaining alone in my room, Jack Yelverton was admitted. In an instant I saw from his countenance that something unusual had occurred. His pale, unshaven face was haggard and worn, his clerical collar was soiled, his coat unbrushed, his hair unkempt, and as he seated himself and put out his hand I felt it quiver in my grasp.
"Why, what"s the matter, old chap?" I inquired in surprise. "What"s happened?"
"I"m upset, Clifton," he answered hoa.r.s.ely.
"What"s upset you? This isn"t like your usual self," I said.
"No," he responded, rising and pacing the room with his hand to his white brow, "it isn"t like me." Then, turning quickly to me, he added with gravity which startled me, "Clifton, I think I"m mad!"
"Mad! Nonsense! my dear fellow!" I protested, placing my hand upon his shoulder. "Tell me what all this is about."
"I"ve failed!" he cried in a voice of utter despair. "I"ve striven, and striven in my work, but all to no purpose. I"ve sown the wind, and the Devil has placed a bar between myself and the Master."
"How?" I asked, failing to grasp his meaning.
"I have made a discovery," he answered in a dry, harsh tone.
"A discovery!" I echoed.
"Yes, one so appalling, so terrible, so absolutely horrible, that I am crushed, hopeless, paralysed."
"What is it?" I demanded quickly, excited by his strange wildness of manner.
"No," he answered. "It is useless to explain. You could never believe that what I told you was the truth."
"I know that you would not willingly tell a lie to your oldest friend, Jack," I answered, with grave earnestness.
"But you could never fully realise the truth," he declared. "A sorrow has fallen upon me greater and more terrible than ever man has encountered; for at the instant of my recovery I knew that I was shut out from the grace of G.o.d, that all my work had been a mere mockery of the Master."
"Why do you speak like this?" I argued, knowing him to be a devout man, and having seen with my own eyes how self-denying he was, and how untiring he had worked among the poor.
"I speak the truth, Clifton," he said, a strange look in his eyes. "I shall never enter my church again."
"Never enter your church!" I cried. "Are you really mad?"
"The wiles of Satan have encompa.s.sed me," he responded hoa.r.s.ely, in the tone of a man utterly broken.
"How? Explain!" I said.
"A woman"s eyes fascinated me. I fell beneath her spell, only to find that her heart was the blackest in all the world."
"Well?"
"My love for her is an absorbing one. She is my idol, and I have cast aside my G.o.d for her."
"Why do you talk like this?" I asked reproachfully. "Has it not been proved to you already that you can marry and yet live a G.o.dly life?"
"Yes, yes! I know," he responded with impatience. "But to love Aline Cloud is to abandon the Master."
"Why?" I inquired, all eagerness to learn what he knew of her strange power of evil.