Miniver loved the days of old When swords were bright and steeds were prancing; The vision of a warrior bold Would set him dancing.

Miniver sighed for what was not, And dreamed and rested from his labors; He dreamed of Thebes and Camelot And Priam"s neighbors.

Miniver mourned the ripe renown That made so many a name so fragrant; He mourned Romance, now on the town, And Art, a vagrant.

Miniver loved the Medici, Albeit he had never seen one; He would have sinned incessantly Could he have been one.

Miniver cursed the commonplace, And eyed a khaki suit with loathing; He missed the mediaeval grace Of iron clothing.

Miniver scorned the gold he sought, But sore annoyed he was without it; Miniver thought and thought and thought And thought about it.

Miniver Cheevy, born too late, Scratched his head and kept on thinking; Miniver coughed, and called it fate, And kept on drinking.

_Edwin Arlington Robinson._

THE RECRUIT

Sez Corporal Madden to Private McFadden: "Bedad, yer a bad un!

Now turn out yer toes!

Yer belt is unhookit, Yer cap is on crookit, Ye may not be dhrunk, But, be jabers, ye look it!

Wan--two!

Wan--two!

Ye monkey-faced divil, I"ll jolly ye through!

Wan--two!-- Time! Mark!

Ye march like the aigle in Cintheral Parrk!"

Sez Corporal Madden to Private McFadden: "A saint it ud sadden To dhrill such a mug!

Eyes front!--ye baboon, ye!-- Chin up!--ye gossoon, ye!

Ye"ve jaws like a goat-- Halt! ye leather-lipped loon, ye!

Wan--two!

Wan--two!

Ye whiskered orang-outang, I"ll fix you!

Wan--two!-- Time! Mark!

Ye"ve eyes like a bat!--can ye see in the dark?"

Sez Corporal Madden to Private McFadden: "Yer figger wants padd"n"-- Sure, man, ye"ve no shape!

Behind ye yer shoulders Stick out like two boulders; Yer shins is as thin As a pair of pen-holders!

Wan--two!

Wan--two!

Yer belly belongs on yer back, ye Jew!

Wan--two!-- Time! Mark!

I"m dhry as a dog--I can"t shpake but I bark!"

Sez Corporal Madden to Private McFadden: "Me heart it ud gladden To blacken your eye.

Ye"re gettin" too bold, ye Compel me to scold ye,-- Tis halt! that I say,-- Will ye heed what I told ye?

Wan--two!

Wan--two!

Be jabers, I"m dhryer than Brian Boru!

Wan--two!-- Time! Mark!

What"s wur-ruk for chickens is sport for the lark!"

Sez Corporal Madden to Private McFadden: "I"ll not stay a gaddin", Wid dagoes like you!

I"ll travel no farther, I"m dyin" for--wather;-- Come on, if ye like,-- Can ye loan me a quather?

Ya-as, you-- What,--two?

And ye"ll pay the potheen? Ye"re a daisy! Whurroo!

You"ll do!

Whist! Mark!

The Rigiment"s flattered to own ye, me spark!"

_Robert W. Chambers._

OFFICER BRADY

THE MODERN RECRUIT

I

Sez Alderman Grady To Officer Brady: "G"wan! Ye"re no lady!

Luk here what ye"ve done: Ye"ve run in Red Hogan, Ye"ve pulled Paddy Grogan, Ye"ve fanned Misther Brogan An" called him a "gun"!

"Way up in Tammany Hall They"s a gintleman layin" f"r you!

"An" what," sez he, "t" "ell," sez he, "Does the villyun mane to do?

Lock up the a.s.s in his shtall!

He"ll rue the day I rue, F"r he"s pulled the dive that kapes me alive, An" he"ll go to the goats! Whurroo!""

II

Sez Alderman Grady To Officer Brady: "Ye pinched young Mullady F"r crackin" a safe!

An" Sinitor Moran An" Alderman Doran Is inside, a-roarin"

F"r justice, ye thafe!

""Way up in Tammany Hall They"s a gintleman layin" f"r you!

"What"s this," sez he, "I hear?" sez he-- An" the air, bedad, grew blue!

"Well, I nivver did hear av such gall!

But if phwat ye say is thrue, He"s pulled a fri"nd av a fri"nd av me fri"nd, An" he"ll go to the goats! Whurroo!"

III

Sez Alderman Grady To Officer Brady: "Here"s Sullivan"s lady Cavoortin" an" riled; She lifted a locket From Casey"s coat pocket, An" it goes to the docket, An" Sullivan"s wild!

""Way up in Tammany Hall They"s a gintleman layin" f"r you!

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