One side of his lips curled up and it was again c.o.c.ky. "I"ll get you home to your boy after Sw.a.n.k"s, but just sayin", whoever"s lookin" after him"s gotta know you"re gonna have a late night."
My still-sensitive c.l.i.t gave a throb that was of a strength and enjoyableness I preferred to focus on, so I just nodded.
He kept the c.o.c.ky grin as he watched me do it.
He apparently had enough time to continue looking smug and not let me go and go to work, which I started to find annoying.
"Would you like me to send a thank you note for my o.r.g.a.s.m, or would me providing that grat.i.tude verbally right now suffice?" I asked touchily.
"Prefer your grat.i.tude to come in a different form than both, so I"ll just wait until tomorrow."
I rolled my eyes.
He gave me another squeeze, and when my eyes got back to him, I saw he was out-and-out smiling.
"Call you to let you know when I"m picking you up," he told me.
"Okay, Merry."
He bent, touched his mouth to mine, gave me another squeeze, and then, to my despair that I hid totally, he let me go.
I stood where I was and watched him go.
He unlocked the front door, opened it, unlocked the storm door and had his hand on the handle before he looked back at me.
"We got a lot to talk about, Cher. We"ll get that s.h.i.t outta the way tomorrow at Sw.a.n.k"s. But I don"t want you dreading it, because, honest as f.u.c.k, we"re gonna get through it and we"re gonna get past it. I won"t make you promises again that I can"t keep. Swear that, babe. So when I promise right now that I know where my head is at with you and I want us both to give this the best shot we can give it, you can believe that."
G.o.d, Merry.
"You gonna give this the best shot you can give, sweetheart?" he asked when I said nothing.
I nodded.
He took in my nod, smiled a small smile, but pushed, "Promise me."
I wanted to hesitate. I wanted to think about it. I was scared out of my mind.
But in that moment, I did not want to give any of that to Merry.
I wanted to give him nothing but what he needed.
So I gave it to him immediately.
"I promise, honey."
His small smile got bigger before he said, "Later, Cher."
"Later," I replied.
His eyes drifted over me, his smile quirked, then he walked out the door.
I watched him do it.
Then I went to it and stood in it as I watched him walk to his Excursion at the curb.
This time, as he drove away, he looked to me and flicked out a hand.
I lifted mine and returned the gesture.
When he was gone, I closed and locked both doors. Then, before I allowed myself to have a nervous breakdown or to act all stupid and girlie and shout with glee while twirling or something (I hadn"t been girlie in so long, I wasn"t sure how to do it), I went to my purse and pulled out my phone.
I maneuvered right to my text string with Merry and stared at the last two texts.
I f.u.c.ked us up, baby, and I"m so f.u.c.king sorry.
Don"t text. If you forgive me, come see me.
The first one I typed in and left unsent.
Now it was sent.
The second one didn"t even sound like me.
I closed my eyes slowly as it came to me.
Ethan.
My little man, he so wanted his momma happy.
I opened my eyes and looked at the texts again, not having that first clue what to do.
Ethan should not have done that.
And Merry needed to know it wasn"t me who"d had the courage to take the next step.
But I didn"t know how to handle either.
"f.u.c.k it," I muttered, tossing the phone on my purse. I went back to my vacuuming, doing it with Celine, losing myself in rivers deep and mountains high, knowing when the time came to deal, if I did it right or I did it wrong, I"d still do it.
Because that was what I did.
It had always been what I did no matter what messes I got myself into.
I dealt.
For me.
For Ethan.
And now I"d do it for Merry.
Chapter Ten.
The Score Garrett After leaving Cher, Garrett walked up the back steps of the station into the bullpen, carrying two Mimi"s coffees.
When he hit the top, he did an automatic scan of the s.p.a.ce, seeing Drew and Sean in the office with the cap. Adam and Ellen, in uniform, were walking down the front steps.
And Garrett"s partner, Mike Haines, was sitting at his desk, a desk that was b.u.t.ted front-to-front with Garrett"s.
Mike had his eyes on him and Garrett moved that way, hitting Mike"s desk at the side to put his coffee down before walking to his own desk.
"Get your business sorted?" Mike asked as Garrett set his coffee down and took his seat.
He looked to Mike. "Yep."
Mike eyed him, hand wrapped around his coffee still resting on his desk.
"Can"t get a read on you," he noted after a few beats. "You either just got a late life offer from the Colts to be their starting tight end or you"re planning to kidnap someone to torture them."
Garrett was not surprised Mike got this read. They"d been partners for a while.
"Accurate on both, seein" as things are good, as in real good, and I"m still p.i.s.sed."
Mike took a sip of his coffee before suggesting, "Maybe we should start with the good s.h.i.t."
"Takin" Cher Rivers to dinner at Sw.a.n.k"s tomorrow."
Disappointment slid through Mike"s features, his mouth went hard, and he sat back in his chair.
Mike could read Garrett, Garrett could read Mike. And his read was that this wasn"t about Garrett not sharing with Mike how things were the last week and a half with Cher. Even if he hadn"t said a word, Mike had definitely heard because everyone in town was talking about Garrett, Cher, and Mia.
But Mike knew him well enough to know that if Garrett wanted to talk it out, he"d do that. So Mike had let it go, waiting for Garrett to come to him if he needed him, or not.
No, his reaction was Mike knowing Garrett liked to get laid and him thinking that was what was happening here.
Garrett figured disappointment didn"t slide through his own features, considering he didn"t feel disappointed.
He felt p.i.s.sed.
"You heard talk," he remarked.
"Impossible not to hear it unless I locked Dusty and me in a soundproofed panic room the last two weeks," Mike returned.
"Well, I can confirm Cher and me hooked up."
Mike leaned toward Garrett"s desk, starting, "Man-"
Garrett leaned forward too.
"It was that. Then it was not that," he bit out. "You know me, brother. I"m dumb enough to get drunk with a good woman who"s a friend who means somethin" to me and f.u.c.k that s.h.i.t up. I"m not that man who would do what you"re thinkin" to Cher."
"You and Mia are-"
"There is no me and Mia."
At the strength of Garrett"s tone, Mike did a slow blink.
"Straight up, Cher and me hooked up," Garrett carried on. "That"s what I thought it was. Wasn"t so drunk I didn"t think she knew the score. She did. Problem was, I didn"t."
"And what"s the score?" Mike asked.
"The score is, when I went to J&J"s after we"d had our thing to get us back on track, some trouble Cher was having walked into the bar with bad timing. I saw that s.h.i.t go down, I asked her about it. But she"s Cher. She"s been f.u.c.ked over so bad, she doesn"t want anyone to think they can get at her just the same as she doesn"t want anyone to think she needs them. She tried to shut me down." Garrett shook his head. "When she did that, what we had before and then what happened between us-havin" her, wakin" up to her-something in me, brother, it just clicked."
"It just clicked," Mike muttered, still studying him.
"Near on two weeks, can"t get the woman off my mind."
Mike"s eyes grew intent. "What"d you and Cher have before?"
"You ever known me to get to know a woman before I took her to bed?" Garrett asked. "I"m not talkin" dating. I"m talkin" spendin" years building a friendship with a woman and then takin" that further."
Understanding hit his eyes as he shook his head. "No, man."
"No," Garrett confirmed. "I know her, Mike. I know how she is with her kid. I know how she is with her friends. I can read her voice. Her eyes. Her movements. I know the depths of her loyalty. I know she"d take a bullet for her son. I know she"s got a smart mouth because she"s just f.u.c.kin" smart. She can hang with the guys. She"s about givin" it all to her girls. She"s funny as f.u.c.k. And now I know she has an unbelievable body, though I do not know how because I"ve seen the woman eat and that"s impossible. I also know she"s an outstanding lay. And I know she looks so pretty first thing in the morning, it"s like a G.o.dd.a.m.ned miracle."
"Jesus, Merry," Mike murmured.
"And I know when I found out she had trouble, that s.h.i.t started eating at me instantly. Eating at me like s.h.i.t would eat at me if I knew my sister had trouble. My dad. You. I wasn"t concerned about a friend. I was all in instantly."
Mike sat there, mouth shut, continuing to study him.
So Garrett gave him more.
"I also know s.h.i.t is done with Mia, not just because she"s engaged to another man but also because I"ve had time to think on things and I know now she was not the woman I needed in my life-not back then, not in the years we"ve been divorced, not now. She"s not strong enough to handle my s.h.i.t. She doesn"t have the tools and she doesn"t have it in her to find them. Might be wrong, but my take is Cher was born with those tools. But now, Mia wants to dump her man and try it again with me. I shut that down."
Mike"s eyes slightly widened.
"Holy f.u.c.k," he whispered.
"Yeah. It"s over with her because I got nothin" left for her, man. I dug deep, but it"s just not there. And now I"m starting something with Cher and that"s all that"s in my head. Doin" that right. The way it started officially was f.u.c.ked up, me gettin" hammered because of Mia. But the way we really started was totally f.u.c.kin" right, bein" friends and layin" that foundation so now we"ll have a mind to each other as we take this shot."