"Probably--some learned professors think that we must go through a second series of dark ages first; when we shall get back to primitive ideas--and primitive pa.s.sions."
"It may be,--nearly everything natural is distorted now; the world seems so tired to me, just looking on."
He stretched himself and threw out his arms--as it were to break some imaginary bonds.
"Yes--we have been coerced into false morals and manners--and we have suppressed most things which make life worth having--sometimes I envy the beasts."
"I never do that--it is only weaklings who are coerced; the strong do what they please, even in these days--but however strong a beast may be, he always finds, as Jack London shows with his wonderful _Buck_ in "The Call of the Wild," that there is invariably "the man with the club.""
"You mean to conquer fate, then?"
"I shall do my very best to obtain my desires, and of course shall have to pay for all my mistakes."
He looked at her curiously--had she made any mistakes? Not many, he thought, her regard was so serene, and her clever, strong face showed no vacillation. He suddenly faced the fact that he was falling in love with her, not as he had tried to do with Lao--not even as he had once succeeded in doing with Alice Southerwood, long ago. There was a quality in his present feeling which almost frightened him, it was so lawless.
She felt his eyes searching hers burningly, and rose from the sofa.
"Now I am going to have my tea--so good-bye for to-day. I have really enjoyed the pictures."
"May not I come and have tea with you? I am all alone."
"Certainly not--Martha would be scandalised. It does seem so extraordinary that I should have to tell you such things--it shows either great disrespect to me, or else--"
"What?" eagerly. He had risen, too, and was following her as she walked down the long room.
"--That you cannot help yourself."
"Yes--that is it. You have bewitched me in some way--I cannot help myself."
"Do you want all I have taken down typewritten? I can do it after tea, if so?"
"And you will sit up there all by yourself from now until you go to bed?"
"Of course."
"You must feel awfully solitary."
"Not in the least. I have books which are the most agreeable companions.
They have no independent moods--you can be sure of them, and pick up those which suit yourself. Good-night."
And she turned at the bend of the great staircase from which the gallery opened, and rapidly walked on to the entrance to her pa.s.sage.
He looked after her with a rapt face, and then he went discontentedly down into the library, and waited for his aunt"s return.
He was extremely disturbed; it was horribly tantalizing to feel that this girl whom he was so pa.s.sionately drawn to, was there in the house with him, and that he might not talk with her further, or be in her presence.
He walked up and down the room--and those who knew the casual Gerard Strobridge, cultivated, polished and self-contained, would have been greatly surprised could they have seen his agitated pacings.
Lady Garribardine had a quizzical eye when she finally came in--how had the afternoon progressed? Her opinion of the mental balance of her secretary was exceedingly high. She felt convinced that she would know exactly how to tackle her nephew, and if Gerard desired to amuse himself he would certainly do so whether she smiled upon the affair or not!
It did strike her that he was rather a dangerous creature to be left a free hand with any young woman--and that after to-day she would see that Katherine ran no more risks from too much of his company.
The pupils of his eyes were rather dilated, she noticed; otherwise he seemed his usual self at tea--and when Colonel Hawthorne left them alone, she got him to read to her, and did not mention her secretary at all.
The afternoon had been most instructive, Katherine thought, as she ate her m.u.f.fin, and looked at the papers before the old schoolroom fire. She had learned a quant.i.ty of things. Mr. Strobridge was undoubtedly a charming man, and she wondered what effect he would have had upon her if she had never met Algy? As it was he mattered no more than a chair or a table, he was just part of her game. And he was rapidly approaching the state when she could obtain complete dominion over him.
"He knows quite well that he is married and that I can never honestly be anything to him. He is only coming after me because he is attracted and is not master of his pa.s.sions or his will. If he is a weakling he must pay the price--I shall not care! He is not thinking in the least as to whether or no it will hurt me--he is only thinking of himself, just like Bob Hartley, only he is a gentleman and therefore does not make any hypocritical promises to try to lure me."
And then she laughed softly. "Well, whatever comes is on his own head, I need have no mercy upon him!"
So she calmly finished her tea and wrote to Matilda whose excited letter with the family news of Gladys" secret marriage she had not yet replied to. Gladys had written her a little missive also--full of thanks for her part in the affair. Bob was being rather rude and unkind to her about it, she said, but it was not altogether his fault, because on Christmas night he had had rather too much to drink, and had been quarrelsome for two days since. She was going to keep the expected event from being known as long as possible, and then she supposed they would go and live somewhere together. It would be wretched poverty and struggle, and she was miserable, but at least she felt an "honest woman," and could not be grateful enough to her sister for bringing this state of things about.
Katherine stared into the fire while she thought over it all. It seemed to her too astonishing that a woman should prefer a life tied to a man who was reluctant to keep her--his drudge and the object of his scorn--to one of her own arranging in America, perhaps--along with the child, but free. Gladys had sufficient talent in her trade to have earned good wages anywhere, and must have enough money saved, could she have got it from Matilda"s fond guardian clutches, to have tided over the time. But weaklings must always suffer and be other people"s slaves and tools. Poor Gladys! Then she fell to thinking of Algy--why was he haunting her? For the first month the complacent satisfaction from the conquest of self had upheld her splendidly, but now the pain felt as keen as on the first day of separation.
_She would crush it._
Except on the path coming out of church she had no words with Mr.
Strobridge on the morrow--and then it was only a few sentences of ordinary greeting. Lady Garribardine claimed his entire attention. She did see him from the window, smoking a cigar in the rose garden in the afternoon, whither he had come from the smoking-room. She deliberately let him catch sight of her, as she stood there, and she marked the look of eager joy on his face, and then she moved away and did not appear again.
So the Monday arrived--the last day of the old year.
Lady Garribardine was having no party for it as was her usual custom; her rheumatism was rather troublesome, and she stayed in the house all the day, up in her boudoir, where Katherine was in constant attendance.
Gerard and Colonel Hawthorne were out rabbiting with the keepers in the park, and only came in to tea.
Katherine found her mistress rather exacting and difficult to please, and she felt tired and cross--so it gave her some kind of satisfaction to be as provoking as possible when she was ordered to pour out the tea for the shooters in the sitting-room. She remained perfectly silent, but every now and then allowed her magnetic eyes to meet Mr. Strobridge"s with the sphinxlike smile in them.
On his side Gerard had found the hours h.e.l.l.--He knew he was now madly in love with this exasperating girl, and that she was exercising the most powerful attraction upon him.
He gazed at her as she sat there, white and sensuous-looking, her red lips pouting, and her grey-green eyes full of some unconscious challenge, and gradually wild excitement grew in his blood.
As soon as her actual duties were over, Katherine said respectfully:
"If Your Ladyship has no more need of me, I must get some letters finished before the post goes."
And when a nod of a.s.sent was given, she quietly left the room.
So Gerard Strobridge knew he would see her no more that night; and there would be a boring dinner with the parson, and his wife and daughter, to be got through, and on the morrow he was returning to town!
For the first time in their lives he felt resentful towards his aunt.
That Seraphim should not have been more sympathetic, and have made some opportunity for him to talk again to Katherine, was quite too bad!
She, who usually understood all his moods and wants! Her silence upon the subject of her secretary, ever since her return from that drive, was ominous, now that he thought about it. Evidently he need hope for no further cooperation from her, and because he was feeling so deeply, he could not act in the casual and intelligent way to secure his ends which he would have used on other occasions. So the incredibly wearisome evening pa.s.sed. The guests left early, and Lady Garribardine went gladly to bed, leaving her nephew and Colonel Hawthorne to drink in the New Year together--the New Year of 1912.
But the old gentleman was fatigued with his day"s shooting and when half-past eleven came he was glad to slink off to his friendly couch.
Thus Gerard was alone.
He lit a cigar and stretched himself in a huge leather armchair, an untouched drink close at hand.