Quintia is lovely to many; to me she is fair, tall, and shapely. Each of these qualities I grant. But that all these make loveliness I deny: for nothing of beauty nor scintilla of sprightliness is in her body so ma.s.sive.
Lesbia is lovely, for whilst the whole of her is most beautiful, she has stolen for herself every love-charm from all her s.e.x.
Lx.x.xVII.
Nulla potest mulier tantum se dicere amatam Vere, quantum a me Lesbia amata mea"s.
Nulla fides ullo fuit umquam foedere tanta, Quanta in amore tuo ex parte reperta meast.
Nunc est mens diducta tua, mea Lesbia, culpa, LXXV Atque ita se officio perdidit ipsa suo, Vt iam nec bene velle queat tibi, si optima fias, Nec desistere amare, omnia si facias.
Lx.x.xVII.
TO LESBIA.
Never a woman could call herself so fondly beloved Truly as Lesbia mine has been beloved of myself.
Never were Truth and Faith so firm in any one compact As on the part of me kept I my love to thyself.
Now is my mind to a pa.s.s, my Lesbia, brought by thy treason, LXXV So in devotion to thee lost is the duty self due, Nor can I will thee well if best of women thou prove thee, Nor can I cease to love, do thou what doings thou wilt.
No woman can say with truth that she has been loved as much as thou, Lesbia, hast been loved by me: no love-troth was ever so greatly observed as in love of thee on my part has been found.
Now is my mind so led apart, my Lesbia, by thy fault, and has so lost itself by its very worship, that now it can not wish well to thee, wert thou to become most perfect, nor cease to love thee, do what thou wilt!
LXXVI.
Siqua recordanti benefacta priora voluptas Est homini, c.u.m se cogitat esse pium, Nec sanctam viola.s.se fidem, nec foedere in ullo Divom ad fallendos numine abusum homines, Multa parata manent in longa aetate, Catulle, 5 Ex hoc ingrato gaudia amore tibi.
Nam quaec.u.mque homines bene cuiquam aut dicere possunt Aut facere, haec a te dictaque factaque sunt; Omniaque ingratae perierunt credita menti.
Quare iam te cur amplius excrucies? 10 Quin tu animo offirmas atque istinc teque reducis Et dis invitis desinis esse miser?
Difficilest longum subito deponere amorem.
Difficilest, verum hoc quae lubet efficias.
Vna salus haec est, hoc est tibi pervincendum: 15 Hoc facias, sive id non pote sive pote.
O di, si vestrumst misereri, aut si quibus umquam Extremam iam ipsa morte tulistis opem, Me miserum aspicite (et, si vitam puriter egi, Eripite hanc pestem perniciemque mihi), 20 Ei mihi surrepens imos ut torpor in artus Expulit ex omni pectore laet.i.tias.
Non iam illud quaero, contra me ut diligat illa, Aut, quod non potisest, esse pudica velit: Ipse valere opto et taetrum hunc deponere morb.u.m. 25 O di, reddite mi hoc pro pietate mea.
LXXVI.
IN SELF-GRATULATION.
If to remember deeds whilme well done be a pleasure Meet for a man who deems all of his dealings be just, Nor Holy Faith ever broke nor in whatever his compact Sanction of G.o.ds abused better to swindle mankind, Much there remains for thee during length of living, Catullus, 5 Out of that Love ingrate further to solace thy soul; For whatever of good can mortal declare of another Or can avail he do, such thou hast said and hast done; While to a thankless mind entrusted all of them perisht.
Why, then, crucify self now with a furthering pain? 10 Why not steady thy thoughts and draw thee back from such purpose, Ceasing wretched to be maugre the will of the G.o.ds?
Difficult "tis indeed long Love to depose of a sudden, Difficult "tis, yet do e"en as thou deem to be best.
This be thy safe-guard sole; this conquest needs to be conquered; 15 This thou must do, thus act, whether thou cannot or can.
If an ye have (O G.o.ds!) aught ruth, or if you for any Bring at the moment of death latest a.s.sistance to man, Look upon me (poor me!) and, should I be cleanly of living, Out of my life deign pluck this my so pestilent plague, 20 Which as a lethargy o"er mine inmost vitals a-creeping, Hath from my bosom expelled all of what joyance it joyed, Now will I crave no more she love me e"en as I love her, Nor (impossible chance!) ever she prove herself chaste: Would I were only healed and shed this fulsome disorder. 25 Oh G.o.ds, grant me this boon unto my piety due!
If to recall good deeds erewhiles performed be pleasure to a man, when he knows himself to be of probity, nor has violated sacred faith, nor has abused the holy a.s.sent of the G.o.ds in any pact, to work ill to men; great store of joys awaits thee during thy length of years, O Catullus, sprung from this ingrate love of thine. For whatever of benefit men can say or can do for anyone, such have been thy sayings and thy doings, and all thy confidences have been squandered on an ingrate mind. Wherefore now dost torture thyself further? Why not make firm thy heart and withdraw thyself from that [wretchedness], and cease to be unhappy despite the G.o.ds" will?
"Tis difficult quickly to depose a love of long growth; "tis difficult, yet it behoves thee to do this. This is thine only salvation, this is thy great victory; this thou must do, whether it be possible or impossible. O G.o.ds, if "tis in you to have mercy, or if ever ye held forth help to men in death"s very extremity, look ye on pitiful me, and if I have acted my life with purity, s.n.a.t.c.h hence from me this canker and pest, which as a lethargy creeping through my veins and vitals, has cast out every gladness from my breast. Now I no longer pray that she may love me in return, or (what is not possible) that she should become chaste: I wish but for health and to cast aside this shameful complaint. O ye G.o.ds, vouchsafe me this in return for my probity.
Lx.x.xVIII.
Quid facit is, Gelli, qui c.u.m matre atque sorore Prurit et abiectis pervigilat tunicis?
Quid facit is, patruom qui non sinit esse maritum?
Ecqui scis quantum suscipiat sceleris?
Suscipit, o Gelli, quantum non ultima Tethys 5 Nec genitor lympharum abluit Ocea.n.u.s: Nam nihil est quicquam sceleris, quo prodeat ultra, Non si demisso se ipse voret capite.
Lx.x.xVIII.
TO GELLIUS.
What may he (Gellius!) do that ever for mother and sister Itches and wakes thro" the nights, working wi" tunic bedoffed?
What may he do who nills his uncle ever be husband?
Wottest thou how much he ventures of sacrilege-sin?
Ventures he (O Gellius!) what ne"er can ultimate Tethys 5 Wash from his soul, nor yet Ocean, watery sire.
For that of sin there"s naught wherewith this sin can exceed he ---- his head on himself.
What does he, Gellius, who with mother and sister itches and keeps vigils with tunics cast aside? What does he, who suffers not his uncle to be a husband? Dost thou know the weight of crime he takes upon himself? He takes, O Gellius, such store as not furthest Tethys nor Ocea.n.u.s, progenitor of waters, can cleanse: for there is nothing of any crime which can go further, not though with lowered head he swallow himself.
Lx.x.xVIIII.
Gellius est tenuis: quid ni? cui tam bona mater Tamque valens vivat tamque venusta soror Tamque bonus patruos tamque omnia plena puellis Cognatis, quare is desinat esse macer?
Qui ut nihil attingit, nisi quod fas tangere non est, 5 Quantumvis quare sit macer invenies.
Lx.x.xVIIII.
ON GELLIUS.
Gellius is lean: Why not? For him so easy a mother Lives, and a sister so boon, bonny and buxom to boot, Uncle so kindly good and all things full of his lady- Cousins, how can he cease leanest of lankies to be?
Albeit, touch he naught save that whose touch is a scandal, 5 Soon shall thou find wherefor he be as lean as thou like.
Gellius is meagre: why not? He who lives with so good a mother, so healthy and so beauteous a sister, and who has such a good uncle, and a world-*full of girl cousins, wherefore should he leave off being lean? Though he touch naught save what is banned, thou canst find ample reason wherefore he may stay lean.
Lx.x.xX.
Nascatur magus ex Gelli matrisque nefando Coniugio et discat Persic.u.m aruspicium: Nam magus ex matre et gnato gignatur oportet, Si verast Persarum inpia relligio, Navos ut accepto veneretur carmine divos 5 Omentum in flamma pingue liquefaciens.
Lx.x.xX.
ON GELLIUS.
Born be a Magus, got by Gellius out of his mother (Marriage nefand!) who shall Persian augury learn.
Needs it a Magus begot of son upon mother who bare him, If that impious faith, Persian religion be fact, So may their issue adore busy G.o.ds with recognised verses 5 Melting in altar-flame fatness contained by the caul.
Let there be born a Magian from the infamous conjoining of Gellius and his mother, and he shall learn the Persian aruspicy. For a Magian from a mother and son must needs be begotten, if there be truth in Persia"s vile creed that one may worship with acceptable hymn the a.s.siduous G.o.ds, whilst the caul"s fat in the sacred flame is melting.
Lx.x.xXI.
Non ideo, Gelli, sperabam te mihi fidum In misero hoc nostro, hoc perdito amore fore, Quod te cognossem bene constantemve putarem Aut posse a turpi mentem inhibere probro, Sed neque quod matrem nec germanam esse videbam 5 Hanc tibi, cuius me magnus edebat amor.
Et quamvis tec.u.m multo coniungerer usu, Non satis id causae credideram esse tibi.
Tu satis id duxti: tantum tibi gaudium in omni Culpast, in quac.u.mque est aliquid sceleris. 10
Lx.x.xXI.
TO GELLIUS.