But, Mitch.e.l.l thought, you really didn"t learn anything that time. Not that you could apply to this one. Only that dying is important to you and if you can"t do it in bed, sometime far in the future, then have it happen during a heroic act with a great number of people watching. Don"t talk foolish. You"re going to die, that"s all . . . so do it as well as you can.
He thought of his father and mother and for a few minutes he prayed.
The woman touched his arm and he looked up. "I"m sorry ...I wish there was something I could do."
"I wish there was too," Mitch.e.l.l answered. "I wonder if you"d do me a favor."
"What is it?"
"Sometime look up my father in Banderas, R. F. Mitch.e.l.l, and let him know what happened." She nodded slowly. "All right." Hyatt leaned forward. "Rady, your folks don"t live in Banderas." "You"ve got a real sense of humor," Mitch.e.l.l said, mildly. Momentarily Hyatt frowned. "You"ve calmed down some." Mitch.e.l.l didn"t reply. He saw d.y.k.e, standing by the big cottonwood tree, motion to the men guarding them, and now they were pulled to their feet. Hyatt turned to the woman. "Claire, we say good-bye now."
"Hy, tell them who he is."
Hyatt grinned. "Honey, I did."
"I think I"m glad they"re hanging you," she said.
Hyatt shrugged. One of the poss.e.m.e.n took Mitch.e.l.l"s arm. He looked at the woman and their eyes held lingeringly. Come on, he thought. You couldn"t say it in minutes, so don"t say it at all. He turned and followed Hyatt across the clearing and he knew that the woman was watching him.
"Get "em up," d.y.k.e ordered.
THEY WERE LIFTED onto the horses and a mounted man rode between them and adjusted the riata loops over their heads. d.y.k.e looked up at them. "Mr. Rady seems to"ve lost his fight."
Hyatt grinned. "He"s turned honest."
Mitch.e.l.l looked at him. "You proved your point. Now you"re wearing it out."
Hyatt"s eyes narrowed. For a moment he was silent and he watched Mitch.e.l.l curiously. "You ever see a hanging?" he asked then.
Mitch.e.l.l shook his head. "No."
"If your neck don"t bust, you strangle awhile." His eyes stayed on Mitch.e.l.l. "You scared?"
Mitch.e.l.l shrugged. "Probably, the same as you are."
A bewildered look crossed Hyatt"s face. Apparently he had expected 369 369 Mitch.e.l.l to panic now, to lose control of himself pleading for his life, but he was at ease and he sat the sorrel without moving. He leaned closer so that only Mitch.e.l.l could hear him say, "Rady"s ten miles away by now; but in another minute he"ll be legally, officially dead."
"I"d say I was doing him some favor," Mitch.e.l.l answered.
Hyatt hesitated, and the cloud of uncertainty clouded his face again. He wanted to whisper, but his voice rasped. "You"re going to hang hang! You understand that? Hang!"
Mitch.e.l.l nodded. "The same as you are."
Hyatt"s teeth clenched. He was about to say more, but he stopped.
Mitch.e.l.l looked down at d.y.k.e. "He"s going to foam at the mouth in a minute."
d.y.k.e shook his head. "He don"t have that long."
But now Hyatt was looking at Mitch.e.l.l calmly, without bewilderment, and without the brooding anger that had been a knife edge inside of him since the fight. That had started to die as they sat by the wagon. He had tried to bring it back by taunting Mitch.e.l.l, but it was no use. His anger was dead and even the memory of it seemed senseless and unimportant. Mitch.e.l.l was a man. Give him credit for it.
That"s how it happened. That"s what caused Hyatt to say, unexpectedly, "Reach in the side of my boot; the right one."
d.y.k.e looked at him. "What for?"
"Just do it!"
Hyatt"s eyes returned to Mitch.e.l.l. "You either got more guts than any man I ever saw . . . or else you"re the dumbest."
d.y.k.e"s two fingers came out of the boot lifting the folded sheet of paper. He unfolded it and his eyes went over it slowly.
The two granite-faced men, at the very gates of a hot and waiting h.e.l.l, stared stonily down at the executioner.
d.y.k.e read it completely: the formal phrasing of the discharge order, the written-in-ink portion that described the soldier, and the scrawled, illegible signature at the bottom. He looked at the date again. Then, and only then, did he look at Mitch.e.l.l.
Their eyes met briefly before d.y.k.e turned away. He said to the men near him, "Take him down and untie him," and started toward the edge of the trees, walking with his head down. He stopped then and turned. "Hyatt Earl too. We"re taking him to Mojave."
When his hands were cut loose, Mitch.e.l.l walked over to d.y.k.e. "Can I have my order now?"
d.y.k.e handed it to him. "Listen, if I tried to tell you I"m sorry-"
Mitch.e.l.l turned away. Don"t listen to that, he thought. You might hit him. Don"t even think of Hyatt. He looked over at the woman and saw her watching him. Then stopped. He"d have plenty of time to talk to her. And he thought, feeling the relief, but still holding himself calm: You"ve carried it this far. Hang on one more minute.
He turned back to d.y.k.e and said, "Don"t take it so hard, we all make mistakes."
21 The Ranchers Lady
Original t.i.tle: The Woman from Tascosa Western Magazine, Western Magazine, September 1955 September 1955 THEY CAME TO Anton Chico on the morning stage, Willis Calender and his son, Jim; the man getting out of the coach first, stretching the stiffness from his back and squaring the curled-brim hat lower over his eyes, and then the boy, hesitating, squinting, rubbing his eyes before jumping down to stand close to his dad. It had been a long, all-night trip from the Puerto de Luna station and a six-hour ride in the wagon before that up from the Calender place in the Yeso Creek country.
Willis Calender had come to Anton Chico to marry a woman he"d never met except in letters. Three letters from him-the first two to get acquainted, the third to ask her to be his wife. She"d answered all of them, saying, yes, she was interested in the marriage state and finally she thought living down on the Yeso would be just fine. Which was exactly what the marriage broker said she would say. Her name was Clare Conway and she was to come over from Tascosa and meet Willis.
He brought Jim along because Jim was eleven, old enough to make the trip without squirming and wanting to stop every second mile, and because he was anxious for Jim to meet this woman before she became his mother. Then, the trip back to Yeso Creek would give the boy time to get used to her. Just bringing her home suddenly and saying, well, Jim, here"s your new ma walking in the door, would be expecting too much of the boy; like asking him to pretend everything was still the same. Jim had been good friends with his mother-though he didn"t cry at the funeral with all the people around-and he had a picture of her in his mind as fresh as yesterday. Willis Calender knew it, and this was the only thing about remarrying that bothered him.
Little Molly was different. Molly was three when her mother died, and Willis wasn"t sure if the little girl even remembered her still. The first few days with the new mother might be difficult, but it would only be a matter of time. It didn"t require the kind of getting used to her that it did with Jim; so Molly had been left home with their three-mileaway neighbors, the Granbys. Molly was four now, though, and she needed a mother. She was the main reason Willis Calender had written to the Santa Fe marriage broker, who was said to have the confidence of every eligible woman from the Panhandle to the Sangre de Cristos.
The boy looked about the early-morning street and then to his dad, who was raising his arms to take the mail sack the driver was lowering. He saw the dark suit coat strain across the shoulders and half expected to hear it rip but hoped it wouldn"t, because it was his father"s only coat that made up a suit. Usually it was hanging with mothb.a.l.l.s in the pockets because cattle aren"t fussy about how a man looks. It was funny to see his dad wearing it. When was the last time? Then he remembered the bright, silent afternoon of the funeral.
Maybe she won"t be here, the boy thought, watching the driver come down off the wheel and take the mail sack and go up the steps of the express office. A man in range clothes was standing there against a post, and as the boy looked that way, their eyes met. The man said, "h.e.l.lo, Jimmy," his mouth forming a funny half-smile in the beard stubble that covered his mouth and jaw.
As Calender looked up, surprise seemed to sadden his weathered face. He put his big hand behind the boy"s shoulder and moved him forward toward the steps and said, "h.e.l.lo, d.i.c.k." Only that.
d.i.c.k Maddox was still against the post, his thumbs crooked in his belt. Another man in range clothes was on the other side of the post from him. Maddox nodded and said, "Will." Then added, "I"m surprised you brought your boy along."
"Why would that be?" Calender said.
"Well, it ain"t many boys see their dad get married."
"How"d you know about that?"
"Things get around," Maddox said easily. "You know, I was surprised Clare didn"t ask one of us fellas to give her away."
CALENDER LOOKED at the man steadily, trying to hide his surprise, and hesitated so it wouldn"t show in his voice. "You know Miss Conway?"
Maddox glanced at the man next to him. "He says do I know Miss Miss Conway." Both of them grinned. "Well, I"d say anybody who"s followed the Canadian to Tascosa knows Conway." Both of them grinned. "Well, I"d say anybody who"s followed the Canadian to Tascosa knows Miss Miss Conway, and that"s just about everybody." Conway, and that"s just about everybody."
The words came like a slap in the face, but Calender thought: Hold on to yourself. And he kept his voice natural when he said, "What do you mean by that?"
Maddox straightened slightly against the post. "You"re marrying her, you must"ve known she worked at the Casa Grande."
Calender was suddenly conscious of his boy looking up at him. He said, "Come on, Jim." And, glancing at d.i.c.k Maddox: "We"ve got to move along."
They started up the street toward the two-story hotel, and Maddox called, "What time"s the wedding?" The man with him laughed. Calender heard them but he didn"t look around.
When they were farther up the street, the boy said, "Who was that man?"
"Maddox is his name," Calender said. "He used to be old man Granby"s herd boss. Now I guess he works around here."
They were silent, and then the boy said, "Why"d you get mad when he started talking about her her?"
"Who got mad?"
"Well, it looked like it."
"Most of the time that man doesn"t know what he"s talking about," Will Calender said. "Maybe I looked mad because I had to stand there and be civil while he wasted air."
"All he said was other people knew her," the boy said.
"All right, let"s not talk about it any more."
"I didn"t see anything wrong in that."
Calender didn"t answer.
"Maybe he was good friends with her."
Calender turned on the boy suddenly, but his judgment held him, and after a moment he spoke quietly: "I said let"s not talk about it any more."
But it stayed in his mind, and now there was an urgency inside him, an impatience to meet this woman face to face and try to read there what her past had been. It was strange. From the letters he had never doubted she was anything but a good woman, but now- And with this uncertainty the fear began to grow, the fear that he"d see something on her face, some mark of an easy woman.
d.a.m.n Maddox! Why"d he have to say it in front of the boy! But he could be just talking, insinuating what isn"t so, Calender thought. A man like that ought to have his tongue cut out. All he"s good for is drink and talk. Ask old man Granby, he got his bellyful of Maddox and fired him.
They went into the hotel, into the quiet, dim lobby with its high-beamed ceiling. Their eyes lifted to the second-floor balcony which extended all the way around, except for the front side, so that all of the hotel"s eleven rooms looked down on the lobby, where, around the balcony support posts, were cane-bottom Douglas chairs and cuspidors and here and there parts of newspapers. The room was empty, except for the man behind the desk who watched them indifferently. His hair glistened flat on an angle over his forehead, and a matchstick barely showed in the corner of his mouth.
"Miss Conway," Will Calender said. The name was loud in the high-ceilinged room, and he felt embarra.s.sed hearing himself say it.
"You"re Mr. Calender?"
"That"s right." Calender thought: How does he know my name? He stared at the room clerk closely. If he starts to grin, I"ll hit him.
"Miss Conway is in number five." The clerk nodded vaguely up the balcony.
Calender hesitated. "Would she be-up yet?"
The clerk started to grin, and Calender thought: Watch yourself, boy. But the clerk just said, "Why don"t you go up and knock on the door?"
The boy frowned, watching his father climb the stairs and move along the balcony. He was walking funny, like his feet hurt. Maybe she won"t be there, the boy thought hopefully. Maybe she changed her mind. No, she"ll be there. He pictured her coming down the stairs, then smiling and patting his cheek and saying, "So this is Jimmy. Jimmy." A smile that would be gone and suddenly come back again. "My, but Jimmy is a fine-looking young man. How old are you, Jimmy?" She"ll be fat and smelly like Mrs. Granby and those other ladies down on Yeso Creek. How come all women get so fat? All except Ma. She wasn"t fat and she smelled nice and she never called me Jimmy. He felt a funny feeling remembering his mother, the sound of her voice and the easy way she did things without complaining or getting excited. What did Molly have to have a mother for? She"s gotten along for a year without one.
He saw the door open, but caught only a glimpse of the woman. His father went inside then, but the door remained open.
The room clerk grinned and winked at the boy. "Now, if that was me, I think I"d close the door."
A moment later they came out of the room. The boy watched his father close the door and follow the woman along the balcony to the stairs and then down. The woman was younger than he"d imagined her, much younger, with a funny hat and blond hair fixed in a bun. And she wasn"t fat; if anything, skinny. Her face was slender, the skin pale-clear and her eyes seemed sad. The boy looked at her until she got close.
"This here is my son," Will Calender said. "We left Molly at the Granbys". She"s only four years old"-he smiled self-consciously-"like I told you in the letters."
The woman smiled back at him. She seemed ill at ease but she said, "How do you do?" to the boy, and her voice was calm and without the false enthusiasm of Will Calender"s.
The boy said, "Ma"am," not looking at her face now but noticing her slender white hands holding the ends of the crocheted shawl in front of her.
A silence followed, and Will Calender suggested that they could get something to eat. He had intended mentioning Maddox"s name up in the room then watch her reaction, but there hadn"t been time. She didn"t look like the kind Maddox hinted she was, did she? Maybe Maddox was just talking. She was better-looking than he"d expected. Those eyes and that low, calm voice. d.i.c.k Maddox better watch his mouth.
They went to the cafe next door for breakfast. Calender and the boy ordered eggs and meat, but Clare Conway just took coffee, because she wasn"t very hungry. Most of the time they ate in silence. Every now and then Will Calender could hear himself chewing and he"d move his fork on the plate or stir at his coffee with the spoon sc.r.a.ping the bottom of the cup. Clare said the coffee was very good. And, maybe a minute later: It"s going to be a nice day. It"s so dry out here you can stand the extra heat.
Then it was Will"s turn. Where you from originally? ...New Orleans....I never been there but I hear it"s a nice town. ...It"s all right. . . . Silence. . . . How long"d you live in Tascosa? . . . Five years. My husband was with one of the cattle companies. . . . Oh. . . . He died three years ago. . . . Silence. . . . That"s right, you told me in your letter.... That"s right, I did. . . . Silence.... What"ve you been doing since then? ...I took a position. . . . Calender"s jaw was set....At the Casa Grande? . . . Clare Conway blushed suddenly. She nodded and took a sip of coffee in the silence.
There were two men at a table near them and Will Calender had the feeling one nudged the other, and they both grinned, looking over, then looked away quickly when Calender shot a glance toward them.
Calender pa.s.sed the back of his hand across his mouth and cleared his throat. "Miss Conway, I planned on ordering some stores this morning, long as I was here. They"re hauled down to Puerto de Luna, and I pick "em up there. Some seed and flour"-he cleared his throat again-"and I have to speak to the justice yet." He looked quickly toward the front window, though it wasn"t necessary because Clare"s eyes were on her coffee cup.
"Jim, here, will stay with you." The boy looked at him with a plea in his eyes, and Will scowled. Then he rose and walked out without looking at the woman.
Standing in front of the hotel, d.i.c.k Maddox looked over toward the cafe as Calender came out, putting on his hat. Maddox glanced at the three men with him, and they grinned as he looked back toward Calender, who was coming toward them now.
"You married yet, Will?"
Calender glanced at Maddox"s closed face, at the beard bristles and the cigarette and the eyes in the shadow of the hat brim. "Not yet," he said, and looked straight ahead again, not slowing his stride.
Maddox waited until he was looking at Calender"s back. He drew on the cigarette and exhaled and said slowly, "Some men will marry just about anything."
Calender"s boots sounded on the planking one, two, three, then stopped. He came around. "Do you mean me, d.i.c.k?"
A SMILE TOUCHED the corner of d.i.c.k Maddox"s mouth. "Old man Granby used to have a saying: If the shoe fits, wear it."
"You can talk plainer than that."