SEBASTIAN. I am sorry, madam, I have hurt your kinsman; But, had it been the brother of my blood, I must have done no less with wit and safety.
You throw a strange regard upon me, and by that I do perceive it hath offended you.
Pardon me, sweet one, even for the vows We made each other but so late ago.
DUKE. One face, one voice, one habit, and two persons!
A natural perspective, that is and is not.
SEBASTIAN. Antonio, O my dear Antonio!
How have the hours rack"d and tortur"d me Since I have lost thee!
ANTONIO. Sebastian are you?
SEBASTIAN. Fear"st thou that, Antonio?
ANTONIO. How have you made division of yourself?
An apple cleft in two is not more twin Than these two creatures. Which is Sebastian?
OLIVIA. Most wonderful!
SEBASTIAN. Do I stand there? I never had a brother; Nor can there be that deity in my nature Of here and everywhere. I had a sister Whom the blind waves and surges have devour"d.
Of charity, what kin are you to me?
What countryman, what name, what parentage?
VIOLA. Of Messaline; Sebastian was my father.
Such a Sebastian was my brother too; So went he suited to his watery tomb; If spirits can a.s.sume both form and suit, You come to fright us.
SEBASTIAN. A spirit I am indeed, But am in that dimension grossly clad Which from the womb I did partic.i.p.ate.
Were you a woman, as the rest goes even, I should my tears let fall upon your cheek, And say "Thrice welcome, drowned Viola!"
VIOLA. My father had a mole upon his brow.
SEBASTIAN. And so had mine.
VIOLA. And died that day when Viola from her birth Had numb"red thirteen years.
SEBASTIAN. O, that record is lively in my soul!
He finished indeed his mortal act That day that made my sister thirteen years.
VIOLA. If nothing lets to make us happy both But this my masculine usurp"d attire, Do not embrace me till each circ.u.mstance Of place, time, fortune, do cohere and jump That I am Viola; which to confirm, I"ll bring you to a captain in this town, Where lie my maiden weeds; by whose gentle help I was preserv"d to serve this n.o.ble Count.
All the occurrence of my fortune since Hath been between this lady and this lord.
SEBASTIAN. [To OLIVIA] So Comes it, lady, you have been mistook; But nature to her bias drew in that.
You would have been contracted to a maid; Nor are you therein, by my life, deceiv"d; You are betroth"d both to a maid and man.
DUKE. Be not amaz"d; right n.o.ble is his blood.
If this be so, as yet the gla.s.s seems true, I shall have share in this most happy wreck.
[To VIOLA] Boy, thou hast said to me a thousand times Thou never shouldst love woman like to me.
VIOLA. And all those sayings will I overswear; And all those swearings keep as true in soul As doth that orbed continent the fire That severs day from night.
DUKE. Give me thy hand; And let me see thee in thy woman"s weeds.
VIOLA. The captain that did bring me first on sh.o.r.e Hath my maid"s garments. He, upon some action, Is now in durance, at Malvolio"s suit, A gentleman and follower of my lady"s.
OLIVIA. He shall enlarge him. Fetch Malvolio hither; And yet, alas, now I remember me, They say, poor gentleman, he"s much distract.
Re-enter CLOWN, with a letter, and FABIAN
A most extracting frenzy of mine own From my remembrance clearly banish"d his.
How does he, sirrah?
CLOWN. Truly, madam, he holds Belzebub at the stave"s end as well as a man in his case may do. Has here writ a letter to you; I should have given "t you to-day morning, but as a madman"s epistles are no gospels, so it skills not much when they are deliver"d.
OLIVIA. Open"t, and read it.
CLOWN. Look then to be well edified when the fool delivers the madman. [Reads madly ] "By the Lord, madam-"
OLIVIA. How now! Art thou mad?
CLOWN. No, madam, I do but read madness. An your ladyship will have it as it ought to be, you must allow vox.
OLIVIA. Prithee read i" thy right wits.
CLOWN. So I do, madonna; but to read his right wits is to read thus; therefore perpend, my Princess, and give ear.
OLIVIA. [To FABIAN] Read it you, sirrah.
FABIAN. [Reads] "By the Lord, madam, you wrong me, and the world shall know it. Though you have put me into darkness and given your drunken cousin rule over me, yet have I the benefit of my senses as well as your ladyship. I have your own letter that induced me to the semblance I put on, with the which I doubt not but to do myself much right or you much shame. Think of me as you please. I leave my duty a little unthought of, and speak out of my injury.
THE MADLY-US"D MALVOLIO"
OLIVIA. Did he write this?
CLOWN. Ay, Madam.
DUKE. This savours not much of distraction.
OLIVIA. See him deliver"d, Fabian; bring him hither.
Exit FABIAN My lord, so please you, these things further thought on, To think me as well a sister as a wife, One day shall crown th" alliance on"t, so please you, Here at my house, and at my proper cost.
DUKE. Madam, I am most apt t" embrace your offer.
[To VIOLA] Your master quits you; and, for your service done him, So much against the mettle of your s.e.x, So far beneath your soft and tender breeding, And since you call"d me master for so long, Here is my hand; you shall from this time be You master"s mistress.
OLIVIA. A sister! You are she.
Re-enter FABIAN, with MALVOLIO
DUKE. Is this the madman?
OLIVIA. Ay, my lord, this same.
How now, Malvolio!
MALVOLIO. Madam, you have done me wrong, Notorious wrong.
OLIVIA. Have I, Malvolio? No.
MALVOLIO. Lady, you have. Pray you peruse that letter.
You must not now deny it is your hand; Write from it if you can, in hand or phrase; Or say "tis not your seal, not your invention; You can say none of this. Well, grant it then, And tell me, in the modesty of honour, Why you have given me such clear lights of favour, Bade me come smiling and cross-garter"d to you, To put on yellow stockings, and to frown Upon Sir Toby and the lighter people; And, acting this in an obedient hope, Why have you suffer"d me to be imprison"d, Kept in a dark house, visited by the priest, And made the most notorious geck and gul That e"er invention play"d on? Tell me why.
OLIVIA. Alas, Malvolio, this is not my writing, Though, I confess, much like the character; But out of question "tis Maria"s hand.
And now I do bethink me, it was she First told me thou wast mad; then cam"st in smiling, And in such forms which here were presuppos"d Upon thee in the letter. Prithee, be content; This practice hath most shrewdly pa.s.s"d upon thee, But, when we know the grounds and authors of it, Thou shalt be both the plaintiff and the judge Of thine own cause.
FABIAN. Good madam, hear me speak, And let no quarrel nor no brawl to come Taint the condition of this present hour, Which I have wond"red at. In hope it shall not, Most freely I confess myself and Toby Set this device against Malvolio here, Upon some stubborn and uncourteous parts We had conceiv"d against him. Maria writ The letter, at Sir Toby"s great importance, In recompense whereof he hath married her.
How with a sportful malice it was follow"d May rather pluck on laughter than revenge, If that the injuries be justly weigh"d That have on both sides pa.s.s"d.
OLIVIA. Alas, poor fool, how have they baffl"d thee!
CLOWN. Why, "Some are born great, some achieve greatness, and some have greatness thrown upon them." I was one, sir, in this interlude- one Sir Topas, sir; but that"s all one. "By the Lord, fool, I am not mad!" But do you remember- "Madam, why laugh you at such a barren rascal? An you smile not, he"s gagg"d"? And thus the whirligig of time brings in his revenges.
MALVOLIO. I"ll be reveng"d on the whole pack of you.
Exit OLIVIA. He hath been most notoriously abus"d.
DUKE. Pursue him, and entreat him to a peace; He hath not told us of the captain yet.
When that is known, and golden time convents, A solemn combination shall be made Of our dear souls. Meantime, sweet sister, We will not part from hence. Cesario, come; For so you shall be while you are a man; But when in other habits you are seen, Orsino"s mistress, and his fancy"s queen.
Exeunt all but the CLOWN
CLOWN sings
When that I was and a little tiny boy, With hey, ho, the wind and the rain, A foolish thing was but a toy, For the rain it raineth every day.
But when I came to man"s estate, With hey, ho, the wind and the rain, "Gainst knaves and thieves men shut their gate, For the rain it raineth every day.
But when I came, alas! to wive, With hey, ho, the wind and the rain, By swaggering could I never thrive, For the rain it raineth every day.
But when I came unto my beds, With hey, ho, the wind and the rain, With toss-pots still had drunken heads, For the rain it raineth every day.
A great while ago the world begun, With hey, ho, the wind and the rain, But that"s all one, our play is done, And we"ll strive to please you every day.
Exit
THE END
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