"If Mr. Buckler would take the advice of one who has had some small experience of ladies" whims," interposed Culverton, "and some partic.i.p.ation in their favours, he would buy some new clothes."
"These are new," I said. "I followed your advice before, and bought enough to stock a shop."
"But of such a desperate colour," he replied. "Lard, Mr. Buckler, you go dressed like a mute at a funeral! The ladies loathe it; stap me, but they loathe it! A scarlet coat, like our friend wears, a full periwig, an embroidered stocking, makes deeper inroads into their affections than a year"s tedious love-making. The dear creatures"
hearts, Mr. Buckler, are in their eyes."
With that the subject of Countess Lukstein dropped. For Culverton, once started upon his favourite topic, launched forth into a complete philosophy of clothes. The colour of each garment, according to him, had a particular effect upon the s.e.x; the adjustment of each ribbon conveyed a particular meaning. He had, indeed, ingeniously cla.s.sified the various coats, hats, breeches, vests, periwigs, ruffles, cravats and the other appurtenances of a gentleman"s wardrobe, with the modes of wearing them, as expressions of feeling and emotion. The larger and more dominant emotions were voiced in the clothes, the delicate and subtler shades of feeling in the disposition of ornaments. In short, "twould be a very profitable philosophy for a race which had neither tongues to speak nor faces and limbs to act their meaning.
This incident, as I have said, determined me upon a compromise, for it set my heart aflame with jealousy. I had not taken Marston into my calculations before; now I reflected that if I retired to the North, I should be leaving a free field for him, and that I was obstinately minded I would not do. On the other hand, however, this promenade in front of my windows, whether undertaken of set purpose or from sheer carelessness, seemed to show that after all I had no stable footing in Ilga"s esteem, and I feared that if I disclosed to her the deception which I had used towards her, there could be but one result and consequence.
I determined then to forward my suit with what ardour and haste I might, and to unbosom myself of my fault in the very hour that I pleaded my love.
The Countess, however, gave me no heart or occasion for the work. Her manner towards me changed completely of a sudden, and where I had previously met with smiles and kindly words, I got now disdainful looks and biting speeches. She would ridicule my conversation, my person, and my bearing, and that, too, before a room full of people, so that I was filled with the deepest shame; or again, she would shrink from me with all the appearances of aversion. Mademoiselle Durette, it is true, sought to lighten my suffering. "It is ever Love"s way to blow hot and cold," she would whisper in my ear. But I thought that she spoke only out of compa.s.sion. For "twas the cold wind which continually blew on me.
At times, indeed, though very rarely, she would resume her old familiarity, but there was a note of effort in her voice as though she subdued herself to a distasteful practice, and something hysterical in her merriment; and as like as not, she would break off in the middle of a kindly sentence and load me with the extremity of scorn.
Moreover, Marston was perpetually at her side, and in his company she made more than one return to the Park; so that at last, being fallen into a most tormenting despair, I made shift to follow Elmscott"s advice, and called at her lodging one morning to inform her that I intended setting my face homewards that very afternoon.
CHAPTER XI.
THE COUNTESS EXPLAINS, AND SHOWS ME A PICTURE.
It was a full week since I had last waited on my cruel mistress, and I hoped, though with no great confidence, that this intermission of my visits might temper and moderate her scorn. I had besides taken to heart Culverton"s advice as well as that of my cousin. For I was in great trepidation lest she should take me at my word, and carelessly bid me adieu, and so caught eagerly at any hint that seemed likely to help me, however trivial it might be, and from whatever source it came.
Consequently I had had my own hair cropped, and had purchased a c.u.mbersome full-bottomed peruke of the latest mode. With that on my head, and habited in a fine new brocaded coat of green velvet and lemon-coloured silk breeches and stockings, I went timidly to confront my destiny. How many times did I walk up and down before her house, or ever I could summon courage to knock! How many phrases and dignified reproaches did I con over and rehea.r.s.e, yet never one that seemed other than offensive and ridiculous! What in truth emboldened me in the end to enter was a cloud of dust which a pa.s.sing carriage caused to settle on my coat. If I hesitated much longer, I reflected, all my bravery would be wasted, and dusting myself carefully with my handkerchief, I mounted the steps. Otto Krax opened the door, and preceded me up the staircase.
But while we were still ascending the steps, Mademoiselle Durette came from the parlour which gave on to the landing.
"Very well, Otto," she said, "I will announce Mr. Buckler."
She waited until the man had descended the stairs, and then turned to me with a meaning smile.
"She is alone. Take her by surprise!"
With that she softly turned the handle of the door, and opened it just so far as would enable me to slip through. I heard the voice of Ilga singing sweetly in a low key, and my heart trembled and jumped within me, so that I hesitated on the threshold.
"I have no patience with you," said Mademoiselle Durette, in an exasperated whisper. "Cowards don"t win when they go a-wooing. Haven"t you learnt that? Ridicule her, if you like, as she does you--abuse her, do anything but gape like a stock-fish, with a white face as though all your blood had run down into the heels of your shoes!"
She pushed me as she spoke into the room, and noiselessly closed the door. The Countess was seated at a spinnet in the far corner of the room, and sang in her native tongue. The song, I gathered, was a plaint, and had a strange and outlandish melancholy, the voice now lifting into a wild, keening note, now sinking abruptly to a dreary monotone. It oppressed me with a peculiar sadness, making the singer seem very lonely and far-away; and I leaned silently against the wall, not daring to interrupt her. At last the notes began to quaver, the voice broke once and twice; she gave a little sob, and her head fell forward on her hands.
An inrush of pity swept all my diffidence away. I stepped hastily forward with outstretched hands. At the sound she sprang to her feet and faced me, the colour flaming in her cheeks.
"Madame," cried I, "if my intrusion lacks ceremony, believe me----"
But I got no further in my protestations. For with a sneer upon her lips and a biting accent of irony,
"So," she broke in, looking me over, "the crow has turned into a c.o.c.katoo." And she rang a bell which stood upon the spinnet. I stopped in confusion, and not knowing what to say or do, remained foolishly shifting from one foot to the other, the while Ilga watched me with a malicious pleasure. In a minute Otto Krax came to the door. "How comes it," she asked sternly, "that Mr. Buckler enters unannounced? Have I no servants?"
The fellow explained that Mademoiselle Durette had taken the duty to herself.
"Send Mademoiselle Durette to me!" said the Countess.
I was ready to sink through the floor with humiliation, and busied my wits in a search for a plausible excuse. I had not found one when the Frenchwoman appeared.
Countess Lukstein repeated her question.
Mademoiselle Burette was no readier than myself, and glanced with a frightened air from me to her mistress, and back again from her mistress to me. Remembering what she had said on the landing about my irresolution, I felt my shame doubled.
"Madame," I stammered out, "the fault is in no wise your companion"s.
The blame of it should fall on me."
"Oh!" said she, "really?" And turning to Mademoiselle Durette, she began to clap her hands. "I believe," she exclaimed in a mock excitement, "that Mr. Buckler is going to make me a present of a superb c.o.c.katoo. Clemence, you must buy a cage and a chain for its leg!"
Clemence stared in amazement, as well she might, and I, stung to a pa.s.sion,
"Nay," I cried, and for once my voice rang firmly. "By the Lord, you count too readily upon Mr. Buckler"s gift. Mr. Buckler has come to offer you no present, but to take his leave for good and all."
I made her a dignified bow and stepped towards the door.
"What do you mean?" she asked sharply.
"That I ride homewards this afternoon."
She shot a glance at Mademoiselle Durette, who slipped obediently out of the room.
"And why?" she asked, with an innocent a.s.sumption of surprise, coming towards me. "Why?"
"What, madame!" I replied, looking her straight in the face. "Surely your ingenuity can find a reason."
"My ingenuity?" She spoke in the same accent of wonderment. "My ingenuity? Mr. Buckler, you take a tone----" She came some paces nearer to me and asked very gently: "Am I to blame?"
The humility of the question, and a certain trembling of the lips that uttered it, well-nigh disarmed me; but I felt that did I answer her, did I venture the mildest reproach, I should give her my present advantage.
"No, no," I replied, with a show of indifference; "my own people need me."
She took another step, and spoke with lowered eyes. "Are there no people who need you here?"
I forgot my part.
"You mean----" I exclaimed impulsively, when a movement which she made brought me to a stop. For she drew back a step, and picking up her fan from a little table, began to pluck nervously at the feathers. Her action recalled to my mind her behaviour at the Duke"s Theatre and Elmscott"s commentary thereon.
"None that I know of," I resumed, "for even those whom I counted my friends find me undeserving of even common civility."
"Civility! Civility!" she cried out in scorn. ""Tis the very proof and attribute of indifference--the crust one tosses carelessly to the first-comer because it costs nothing."