Jane listened.
"The fact is," said Brodrick, bracing himself, "you have him too much with you."
"I _must_ have him with me."
"You mustn"t," said Brodrick, with his forced gentleness.
"You think I"m bad for him?"
He did not answer.
"Gertrude--do _you_ think I"m bad for him?"
Gertrude smiled. She did not answer any more than Brodrick.
"Miss Collett agrees with me," said Brodrick.
"She always does. What do I do to him?"
"You excite him."
"Do I, Gertrude?"
Gertrude"s face seemed to be imploring Brodrick to be pitiful, and not to rub it in.
"Do I?"
"The child," said Gertrude evasively, "is very sensitive."
"And you create," Brodrick said, "an atmosphere----"
"A what?"
"An atmosphere of perpetual agitation--of emotion----"
"You mean my child is fond of me."
"Much too fond of you. It"s playing the devil with him."
"Poor mite--at _his_ age! Well--what do you propose?"
"I propose that he should be with somebody who hasn"t that effect, who can keep him quiet. Miss Collett very kindly offered----"
"Dear Gertrude, you can"t. You"ve got your hands full."
"Not so full that they can"t hold a little more." Gertrude said it with extreme sweetness.
"Can they hold Hughy?"
"They"ve held Jacky," said Brodrick, "for the last year. _He_ never gives any trouble."
"He never feels it. Poor Baby has got nerves----"
"Well, my dear girl, isn"t it all the more reason why he should be with somebody who hasn"t got "em?"
"Poor Gertrude, she"ll have more nerves than any of us if she has to look after the house, and the accounts, and Jacky, and Hughy, and _you_----"
"She doesn"t look after me," said Brodrick stiffly, and left the room.
Jane turned to Gertrude.
"Was that your idea, or his?"
"How can any idea be mine," said Gertrude, "if I always agree with Mr.
Brodrick? As a matter of fact it was the Doctor"s."
"Yes. It was very like him."
"He spoke to Mr. Brodrick yesterday. And I am glad he did."
"Why are you glad?"
"Because it was taken out of my hands. I don"t want you to think that I interfere, that I put myself forward, that I suggested this arrangement about the children. If it"s to be, you must understand distinctly that I and my ideas and my wishes have nothing to do with it. If I offered myself it was because I was compelled. Mr. Brodrick was at his wits"
end."
("Poor dear, _I_ drove him there," said Jane.)
"It"s put me in a very difficult position. I have to appear to be taking everything on myself, to be thrusting myself in everywhere, whereas the truth is I can only keep on" (she closed her eyes, as one dizzied with the perilous path she trod) "by ignoring myself, putting myself altogether on one side."
"Do you hate it?" Jane said softly.
"No. It"s the only way. But sometimes one is foolish--one looks for a little recognition and reward----"
Jane put her hands on the other woman"s shoulders and gazed into her face.
"We do recognize you," she said, "even if we don"t reward you. How can we, when you"ve done so much?"
"My reward would be--not to be misunderstood."
"Do I misunderstand you? Does _he_?"
"Mr. Brodrick? Never."
"I, then?"
"You? I think you thought I wanted to come between you and the children."
"I never thought you wanted to come between me and anything."