"Did you really see an otter, Scott?"
"Yes, I did!" he exclaimed. "Out in the Gray Water, swimming like a dog.
That was yesterday afternoon. It"s a scarce creature here. I"ll tell you what, Kathleen; we"ll take our luncheon and go out and spend the day watching for it."
"No," she said, drying her hands on her handkerchief, "I can"t spend every minute of the day with you. Ask some other woman."
"What other woman?" She was gazing out at the sunlit ripples. A little unquiet thrill leaped through her veins, but she went on carelessly:
"Take some pretty woman out with you. There are several here----"
"Pretty woman," he repeated. "Do you think that"s the only reason I want you to come?"
"Only reason? What a silly thing to say, Scott. I am not a pretty woman to you--in that sense----"
"You are the prettiest I ever saw," he said, looking at her; and again the unquiet thrill ran like lightning through her veins. But she only laughed carelessly and said:
"Oh, of course, Geraldine and I expect our big brother to say such things."
"It has nothing to do with Geraldine or with brothers," he said doggedly. She strove to laugh, caught his gaze, and, discountenanced, turned toward the stream.
"We can cross on the stepping stones," she suggested. And after a moment: "Are you coming?"
"See here, Kathleen," he said, "you"re not acting squarely with me."
"What do you mean?"
"No, you"re not. I"m a man, and you know it."
"Of course you are, Scott."
"Then I wish you"d recognise it. What"s the use of mortifying me when I act--speak--behave as any man behaves who--who--is--fond of a--person."
"But I don"t mean to--to mortify you. What have I done?"
He dug his hands into the pockets of his riding breeches, took two or three short turns along the bank, came back to where she was standing.
"You probably don"t remember," he said, "one night this spring when--when--" He stopped short. The vivid tint in her cheeks was his answer--a swift, disconcerting answer to an incomplete question, the remainder of which he himself had scarcely yet a.n.a.lysed.
"Scott, dear," she said steadily, in spite of her softly burning cheeks, "I will be quite honest with you if you wish. I do know what you"ve been trying to say. I am conscious that you are no longer the boy I could pet and love and caress without embarra.s.sment to either of us. You are a man, but try to remember that I am several years older----"
"Does that matter!" he burst out.
"Yes, dear, it does.... I care for you--and Geraldine--more than for anybody in the world. I understand your loyalty to me, Scott, and I--I love it. But don"t confuse it with any serious sentiment."
"I do care seriously."
"You make me very happy. Care for me very, very seriously; I want you to; I--I need it. But don"t mistake the kind of affection that we have for each other for anything deeper, will you?"
"Don"t you want to care for me--that way?"
"Not _that_ way, Scott."
"Why?"
"I"ve told you. I am so much older----"
"_Couldn"t_ you, all the same?"
She was trembling inwardly. She leaned against a white birch-tree and pa.s.sed one hand across her eyes and upward through the thick burnished hair.
"No, I couldn"t," she whispered.
The boy walked to the edge of the brook. Past him hurried the sun-tipped ripples; under them, in irregular wedge formation, little ones ahead, big ones in the rear, lay a school of trout, wavering silhouettes of amber against the bottom sands.
One arm encircling the birch-tree, she looked after him in silence, waiting. And after a while he turned and came back to her:
"I suppose you knew I fell in love with you that night when--when--you remember, don"t you?"
She did not answer.
"I don"t know how it happened," he said: "something about you did it. I want to say that I"ve loved you ever since. It"s made me serious.... I haven"t bothered with girls since. You are the only woman who interests me. I think about you most of the time when I"m not doing something else," he explained navely. "I know perfectly well I"m in love with you because I don"t dare touch you--and I"ve never thought of--of kissing you good-night as we used to before that night last spring.... You remember that we didn"t do it that night, don"t you?"
Still no answer, and Kathleen"s delicate, blue-veined hands were clenched at her sides and her breath came irregularly.
"That was the reason," he said. "I don"t know how I"ve found courage to tell you. I"ve often been afraid you would laugh at me if I told you....
If it"s only our ages--you seem as young as I do...." He looked up, hopefully; but she made no response.
The boy drew a long breath.
"I love you, anyway," he said. "And that"s how it is."
She neither spoke nor stirred.
"I suppose," he went on, "because I was such a beast of a boy, you can never forget it."
"You were the sweetest, the best--" Her voice broke; she swung about, moved away a few paces, stood still. When he halted behind her she turned.
"Dearest," she said tremulously, "let me give you what I can--love, as always--solicitude, companionship, deep sympathy in your pleasures, deep interest in your amus.e.m.e.nts.... Don"t ask for more; don"t think that you want more. Don"t try to change the loyalty and love you have always had for something you--neither of us understand--neither of us ought to desire--or even think of----"
"Why?"
"Can"t you understand? Even if I were not too old in years, I dare not give up what I have of you and Geraldine for this new--for anything more hazardous.... Suppose it were so--that I could venture to think I cared for you that way? What might I put in peril?--Geraldine"s affection for me--perhaps her relations with you.... And the world is cynical, Scott, and you are wealthy even among very rich men, and I was your paid guardian--quite penniless--engaged to care for and instruct----"
"Don"t say such things!" he said angrily.
"The world would say them--your friends--perhaps Geraldine might be led to doubt--Oh, Scott, dear, I know, I know! And above all--I am afraid.
There are too many years between us--too many blessed memories of my children to risk.... Don"t try to make me care for you in any other way."
A quick flame leaped in his eyes.