"Yes."
"Guess it"s my turn next. How--how does it go?"
Sanborn"s laugh had an odd little quaver. "Why, so far as I know, I guess it"s all right. d.a.m.n queer, though. I wish we"d got here in daytime.... But maybe that wouldn"t help."
"Humph!... Pretty quiet out there?"
"So Bob says, but what"s he know--more than us? I heard guns up the line, and rifle-fire not so far off."
"Can you see any--"
"Not a d.a.m.n thing--yet everything," interrupted Sanborn, enigmatically.
"Dixon!" called Owens, low and quickly, from the darkness.
Dixon did not reply. His sudden hard breathing, the brushing of his garments against the door, then swift, soft steps dying away attested to the fact of his going.
Dorn tried to compose himself to rest, if not to sleep. He heard Sanborn sit down, and then apparently stay very still for some time. All of a sudden he whispered to himself. Dorn distinguished the word "h.e.l.l."
"What"s ailin" you, pard?" drawled Brewer.
Sanborn growled under his breath, and when some one else in the dugout quizzed him curiously he burst out: "I"ll bet you galoots the state of California against a dill pickle that when your turn comes you"ll be sick in your gizzards!"
"We"ll take our medicine," came in the soft, quiet voice of Purcell.
No more was said. The men all pretended to fall asleep, each ashamed to let his comrade think he was concerned.
A short, dull, heavy rumble seemed to burst the outer stillness. For a moment the dugout was silent as a tomb. No one breathed. Then came a jar of the earth, a creaking of shaken timbers. Some one gasped involuntarily. Another whispered:
"By G.o.d! the real thing!"
Dorn wondered how far away that jarring sh.e.l.l had alighted. Not so far!
It was the first he had ever heard explode near him. Roaring of cannon, exploding of sh.e.l.l--this had been a source of every-day talk among his comrades. But the jar, the tremble of the earth, had a dreadful significance. Another rumble, another jar, not so heavy or so near this time, and then a few sharply connected reports, clamped Dorn as in a cold vise. Machine-gun shots! Many thousand machine-gun shots had he heard, but none with the life and the spite and the spang of these. Did he imagine the difference? Cold as he felt, he began to sweat, and continually, as he wiped the palms of his hands, they grew wet again. A queer sensation of light-headedness and weakness seemed to possess him.
The roots of his will-power seemed numb. Nevertheless, all the more revolving and all-embracing seemed his mind.
The officer in his speech a few hours back had said the sector to which the battalion had been a.s.signed was alive. By this he meant that active bombardment, machine-gun fire, hand-grenade throwing, and gas-sh.e.l.ling, or attack in force might come any time, and certainly must come as soon as the Germans suspected the presence of an American force opposite them.
That was the stunning reality to Dorn--the actual existence of the Huns a few rods distant. But realization of them had not brought him to the verge of panic. He would not flinch at confronting the whole German army. Nor did he imagine he put a great price upon his life. Nor did he have any abnormal dread of pain. Nor had the well-remembered teachings of the Bible troubled his spirit. Was he going to be a coward because of some incalculable thing in him or force operating against him? Already he sat there, shivering and sweating, with the load on his breast growing laborsome, with all his sensorial being absolutely at keenest edge.
Rapid footfalls halted his heart-beats. They came from above, outside the dugout, from the trench.
"Dorn, come out!" called the corporal.
Dorn"s response was instant. But he was as blind as if he had no eyes, and he had to feel his way to climb out. The indistinct, blurred form of the corporal seemed half merged in the pale gloom of the trench. A cool wind whipped at Dorn"s hot face. Surcharged with emotion, the nature of which he feared, Dorn followed the corporal, stumbling and sliding over the wet boards, knocking bits of earth from the walls, feeling a sick icy gripe in his bowels. Some strange light flared up--died away.
Another rumble, distinct, heavy, and vibrating! To his left somewhere the earth received a shock. Dorn felt a wave of air that was not wind.
The corporal led the way past motionless men peering out over the top of the wall, and on to a widening, where an abutment of filled bags loomed up darkly. Here the corporal cautiously climbed up breaks in the wall and stooped behind the fortification. Dorn followed. His legs did not feel natural. Something was lost out of them. Then he saw the little figure of Rogers beside him. Dorn"s turn meant Rogers"s relief. How pale against the night appeared the face of Rogers! As he peered under his helmet at Dorn a low whining pa.s.sed in the air overhead. Rogers started slightly. A thump sounded out there, interrupting the corporal, who had begun to speak. He repeated his order to Dorn, bending a little to peer into his face. Dorn tried to open his lips to say he did not understand, but his lips were mute. Then the corporal led Rogers away.
That moment alone, out in the open, with the strange, windy pall of night--all-enveloping, with the flares, like sheet-lightning, along the horizon, with a rumble here and a roar there, with whistling fiends riding the blackness above, with a series of popping, impelling reports seemingly close in front--that drove home to Kurt Dorn a cruel and present and unescapable reality.
At that instant, like bitter fate, shot up a rocket, or a star-flare of calcium light, bursting to expose all underneath in pitiless radiance.
With a gasp that was a sob, Dorn shrank flat against the wall, staring into the fading circle, feeling a creep of paralysis. He must be seen.
He expected the sharp, biting series of a machine-gun or the bursting of a bomb. But nothing happened, except that the flare died away. It had come from behind his own lines. Control of his muscles had almost returned when a heavy boom came from the German side. Miles away, perhaps, but close! That boom meant a great sh.e.l.l speeding on its hideous mission. It would pa.s.s over him. He listened. The wind came from that side. It was cold; it smelled of burned powder; it carried sounds he was beginning to appreciate--shots, rumbles, spats, and thuds, whistles of varying degree, all isolated sounds. Then he caught a strange, low moaning. It rose. It was coming fast. It became an o-o-o-O-O-O! Nearer and nearer! It took on a singing whistle. It was pa.s.sing--no--falling!... A mighty blow was delivered to the earth--a jar--a splitting shock to windy darkness; a wave of heavy air was flung afar--and then came the soft, heavy thumping of falling earth.
That sh.e.l.l had exploded close to the place where Dorn stood. It terrified him. It reduced him to a palpitating, stricken wretch, utterly unable to cope with the terror. It was not what he had expected. What were words, anyhow? By words alone he had understood this sh.e.l.l thing.
Death was only a word, too. But to be blown to atoms! It came every moment to some poor devil; it might come to him. But that was not fighting. Somewhere off in the blackness a huge iron monster belched this h.e.l.l out upon defenseless men. Revolting and inconceivable truth!
It was Dorn"s ordeal that his mentality robbed this hour of novelty and of adventure, that while his natural, physical fear incited panic and nausea and a horrible, convulsive internal retching, his highly organized, exquisitely sensitive mind, more like a woman"s in its capacity for emotion, must suffer through imagining the infinite agonies that he might really escape. Every sh.e.l.l then must blow him to bits; every agony of every soldier must be his.
But he knew what his duty was, and as soon as he could move he began to edge along the short beat. Once at the end he drew a deep and shuddering breath, and, fighting all his involuntary instincts, he peered over the top. An invisible thing whipped close over his head. It did not whistle; it cut. Out in front of him was only thick, pale gloom, with spectral forms, leading away to the horizon, where flares, like sheet-lightning of a summer night"s storm, ran along showing smoke and bold, ragged outlines. Then he went to the other end to peer over there. His eyes were keen, and through long years of habit at home, going about at night without light, he could see distinctly where ordinary sight would meet only a blank wall. The flat ground immediately before him was bare of living or moving objects. That was his duty as sentinel here--to make sure of no surprise patrol from the enemy lines. It helped Dorn to realize that he could accomplish this duty even though he was in a torment.
That s.p.a.ce before him was empty, but it was charged with current. Wind, shadow, gloom, smoke, electricity, death, spirit--whatever that current was, Dorn felt it. He was more afraid of that than the occasional bullets which zipped across. Sometimes shots from his own squad rang out up and down the line. Off somewhat to the north a machine-gun on the Allies" side spoke now and then spitefully. Way back a big gun boomed.
Dorn listened to the whine of sh.e.l.ls from his own side with a far different sense than that with which he heard sh.e.l.ls whine from the enemy. How natural and yet how unreasonable! Sh.e.l.ls from the other side came over to destroy him; sh.e.l.ls from his side went back to save him.
But both were shot to kill! Was he, the unknown and shrinking novice of a soldier, any better than an unknown and shrinking soldier far across there in the darkness? What was equality? But these were Germans! That thing so often said--so beaten into his brain--did not convince out here in the face of death.
Four o"clock! With the gray light came a gradually increasing number of sh.e.l.ls. Most of them struck far back. A few, to right and left, dropped near the front line. The dawn broke--such a dawn as he never dreamed of--smoky and raw, with thunder spreading to a circle all around the horizon.
He was relieved. On his way in he pa.s.sed Purcell at the nearest post.
The elegant New-Yorker bore himself with outward calm. But in the gray dawn he looked haggard and drawn. Older! That flashed through Dorn"s mind. A single night had contained years, more than years. Others of the squad had subtly changed. Dixon gave him a penetrating look, as if he wore a mask, under which was a face of betrayal, of contrast to that soldier bearing, of youth that was gone forever.
CHAPTER XXVIII
The squad of men to which Dorn belonged had to be on the lookout continually for an attack that was inevitable. The Germans were feeling out the line, probably to verify spy news of the United States troops taking over a sector. They had not, however, made sure of this fact.
The gas-sh.e.l.ls came over regularly, making life for the men a kind of suffocation most of the time. And the great sh.e.l.ls that blew enormous holes in front and in back of their position never allowed a relaxation from strain. Drawn and haggard grew the faces that had been so clean-cut and brown and fresh.
One evening at mess, when the sector appeared quiet enough to permit of rest, Rogers was talking to some comrades before the door of the dugout.
"It sure got my goat, that little promenade of ours last night over into No Man"s Land," he said. "We had orders to slip out and halt a German patrol that was supposed to be stealing over to our line. We crawled on our bellies, looking and listening every minute. If that isn"t the limit! My heart was in my mouth. I couldn"t breathe. And for the first moments, if I"d run into a Hun, I"d had no more strength than a rabbit.
But all seemed clear. It was not a bright night--sort of opaque and gloomy--shadows everywhere. There wasn"t any patrol coming. But Corporal Owens thought he heard men farther on working with wire. We crawled some more. And we must have got pretty close to the enemy lines--in fact, we had--when up shot one of those d.a.m.ned calcium flares. We all burrowed into the ground. I was paralyzed. It got as light as noon--strange greenish-white flare. It magnified. Flat as I lay, I saw the German embankments not fifty yards away. I made sure we were goners. Slowly the light burned out. Then that machine-gun you all heard began to rattle.
Something queer about the way every shot of a machine-gun bites the air.
We heard the bullets, low down, right over us. Say, boys, I"d almost rather be hit and have it done with!... We began to crawl back. I wanted to run. We all wanted to. But Owens is a nervy guy and he kept whispering. Another machine-gun cut loose, and bullets rained over us.
Like hail they hit somewhere ahead, scattering the gravel. We"d almost reached our line when Smith jumped up and ran. He said afterward that he just couldn"t help himself. The suspense was awful. I know. I"ve been a clerk in a bank! Get that? And there I was under a hail of Hun lead, without being able to understand why, or feel that any time had pa.s.sed since giving up my job to go to war. Queer how I saw my old desk!...
Well, that"s how Smith got his. I heard the bullets spat him, sort of thick and soft.... Ugh!... Owens and I dragged him along, and finally into the trench. He had a bullet through his shoulder and leg. Guess he"ll live, all right.... Boys, take this from me. n.o.body can _tell_ you what a machine-gun is like. A rifle, now, is not so much. You get shot at, and you know the man must reload and aim. That takes time. But a machine-gun! Whew! It"s a comb--a fine-toothed comb--and you"re the louse it"s after! You hear that steady rattle, and then you hear bullets everywhere. Think of a man against a machine-gun! It"s not a square deal."
Dixon was one of the listeners. He laughed.
"Rogers, I"d like to have been with you. Next time I"ll volunteer. You had action--a run for your money. That"s what I enlisted for. Standing still--doing nothing but wait--that drives me half mad. My years of football have made action necessary. Otherwise I go stale in mind and body.... Last night, before you went on that scouting trip, I had been on duty two hours. Near midnight. The sh.e.l.ling had died down. All became quiet. No flares--no flashes anywhere. There was a luminous kind of glow in the sky--moonlight through thin clouds. I had to listen and watch.
But I couldn"t keep back my thoughts. There I was, a soldier, facing No Man"s Land, across whose dark s.p.a.ce were the Huns we have come to regard as devils in brutality, yet less than men.... And I thought of home. No man knows what home really is until he stands that lonely midnight guard. A shipwrecked sailor appreciates the comforts he once had; a desert wanderer, lost and starving, remembers the food he once wasted; a volunteer soldier, facing death in the darkness, thinks of his home! It is a h.e.l.l of a feeling!... And, thinking of home, I remembered my girl.
I"ve been gone four months--have been at the front seven days (or is it seven years?) and last night in the darkness she came to me. Oh yes! she was there! She seemed reproachful, as she was when she coaxed me not to enlist. My girl was not one of the kind who sends her lover to war and swears she will die an old maid unless he returns. Mine begged me to stay home, or at least wait for the draft. But I wasn"t built that way.
I enlisted. And last night I felt the bitterness of a soldier"s fate.
All this beautiful stuff is bunk!... My girl is a peach. She had many admirers, two in particular that made me run my best down the stretch.