Was he dreaming? Why was she hugging him?
Even with those questions in mind, Lu Yifeng"s mind finally calmed down.
"I will listen to you..." Xia Meilin"s gentle and sweet voice was heard from behind him.
He wiped his tears away before he placed his hand on her arm. Her arm was soft and warm, she was really there. "I..." He paused when his voice cracked.
Xia Meilin placed her hand on top of his, intertwining their fingers together as if she was making him feel that she won"t leave. She was willing to patiently listen to him and this time, she won"t break down and let her emotions get ahead of her.
Lu Yifeng stared at their fingers that were entwined together and it brought warmth in him. "I have said everything I have wanted to say..."
Yes, he wanted to confess his crimes to her and... ask for forgiveness.
"Then answer my questions instead." She rested her head on his back. "Did you die... in our previous life? Oh wait, that was a stupid question, of course, you did, that"s why you"re here."
"I was killed by your brother." Lu Yifeng honestly said. He let go of her hand and unwrapped her arms around him before he turned to her.
Xia Meilin"s eyes were wide in surprise because of what he said. Her brother was still alive in their past life? That was like... two years from now. Then did that mean that... he was able to live longer?
Lu Yifeng reached out to touch her cheek but just when his hand was just an inch from her cheek, he hesitated and because of this, he was about to pull it away but Xia Meilin caught his hand just in time. She gave it a squeeze before she placed it on her cheek as she leaned against his huge and warm hand.
His eyes softened when she did that, he still couldn"t believe that she was allowing him to touch her even after he told her the truth.
Why? Why was she being like this? Wasn"t she afraid of him earlier? "Even if your brother didn"t kill me back then... I was still planning to follow you..."
"You love me that much?"
"Yes, I love you this much... although I admit that the way I showed my love to you in the past was wrong..."
"Yes, it was, it even made me thought that you were actually a s.a.d.i.s.t, a sick b.a.s.t.a.r.d." She stared into his eyes, both their eyes were red and puffy since both of them cried.
"I know... that"s why when I learned that I went back in time, I wanted to make things right. I wanted to properly show my love to you." He caressed her soft lips with his thumb. "What I did in the past was wrong."
"Yes, it was. I"m glad you know." She wrapped her arms around his waist. "But we are not living in the past anymore... You have shown me that you were not the man you once were back then..." That"s why how can she turn a blind eye when she has seen his efforts to be a better man for her? He even made her fall in love with him.
"You are really kind, Meilin." He said softly.
"No... I"m not kind. I just wanted to try to understand why. I want to know your reasons." She buried her face on his chest as she hugged him close. "You know... it"s unfair... this love I have for you... it"s making me hard to push you away so from now, don"t leave my side, okay?"
His eyes became misty because of her words. Was he hearing it right?
"My mother once said that... if you love someone, you should accept everything about him, even his bad sides. If you think that you can correct his bad sides, then do it slowly. Never force him if he doesn"t want it. A person can only change if that person is willing to change." She raised her head and looked at him, "If it was me who doesn"t love you... I will surely hate you so much and run away but... I love you, I can"t bring myself to hate you and get angry at you for a long time."
"You"re selfless, Meilin... very selfless." He stroked her hair gently. "That"s one of the things that I love about you."
She shook her head a bit, disagreeing to what he was saying. "I"m not selfless, in fact, I am a very selfish person, Yifeng. I will never share you with anyone."
"So do I."
She closed her salty eyes and rested her head on his chest. "Lu Yifeng, what made you love me this much?"
"You"re my first love." He placed a soft kiss on top of her head. "Aside from you, I cannot imagine myself being with someone else."
"Ah... the you in the past will never say this to me. I find it weird that you"re really being gentle to me right now." She chuckled a bit. How can she possibly hate him if he was being like this? "But you know... I"m glad that I was able to see this part of you."
"This part of me is only for you."
She smiled as her hug tightened around him. "I"m happy that we"re having this talk... I"m happy that you"re being honest with me, Yifeng." She nuzzled on his chest. "Even though the truth hurts, even if you know that I might hate you again, you still told me everything... You are so brave, Yifeng."