"Hold out both your hands."
Herb Asher held out both his hands. Immediately cuffs closed around his wrists.
"Continue," the cop said. "But I should tell you that anything you say may be held against you in a court of law."
"The plan was to smuggle G.o.d back to Earth," Herb Asher said. "In my wife"s womb. It succeeded. That"s why there"s a warrant out for me. The crime I committed was smuggling G.o.d back to Earth, where the Evil One rules. The Evil One secretly controls everyone and everything here. For example, you are working for the Evil One."
"I"m-"
"But you don"t realize it. You have never heard of Belial."
"True," the cop said.
"That proves my point," Herb Asher said.
"Everything you have said since I grappled onto you has been recorded," the cop said. "It will be a.n.a.lyzed. So you"re G.o.d"s father."
"Legal father."
"And that"s why you"re wanted. I wonder what the statute violation is, technically. I"ve never seen it listed. Posing as G.o.d"s father."
"Legal father."
"Who"s his real father?"
"He is," Herb Asher said. "He impregnated his mother."
"This is disgusting."
"It"s the truth. He impregnated her with himself, and thereby replicated himself in microform by which method he was able to-"
"Should you be telling me this?"
"The battle is over. G.o.d has won. The power of Belial has been destroyed."
"Then why are you sitting here with the cuffs on and why am I pointing a laser gun at you?"
"I"m not sure. I"m having trouble figuring that out. That and South PacJic. There are a few bits and pieces I can"t seem to get to go in place. But I"m working on it. What I am positive about is Yah"s victory." "Yah." I guess that"s G.o.d."
"Yes; his actual name. His original name. When he was living on the top of the mountain."
The cop said, "I don"t mean to compound your troubles, but you are the most f.u.c.ked-up human being I have ever met. And I see a lot of different kinds of people. They must have slushed your brain when they put you in cryonic suspension. They must not have gotten to you in time. I"d say that about a sixth of your brain is working and that sixth isn"t working right, not at all. I"m taking you to a far, far better place than you have ever been, and they will do far, far better things to you than you can possibly imagine. In my opinion-"
"I"ll tell you something else," Herb Asher said. "You know who my business partner is? The prophet Elijah."
Into his microphone the cop said, "This is 356 Kansas. I am bringing an individual in for psychiatric evaluation, a white male about-" To Herb Asher he said, "Did I give you your license back?" The cop put his gun back in its holster and rummaged beside him for Herb Asher"s license. Herb Asher lifted the gun from the cop"s holster and pointed it at him; he had to hold both hands together because of the cuffs, but nonetheless he was able to do it.
"He has my gun," the cop said. The intercom speaker sputtered, "You let a slusher get your gun?"
"Well, he was running off at the mouth about G.o.d; I thought he was . . ." The cop"s voice trailed off lamely.
"What is the individual"s name?" the speaker sputtered.
"Asher. Herbert Asher."
"Mr.Asher," the speaker sputtered, "please return the officer"s gun."
"I can"t," Herb Asher said. "I"m frozen in cryonic suspension. And there"s a fifty-thousand-watt FM transmitter next door playing South PacJic. It"s driving me crazy. The speaker sputtered, "Suppose we instruct the station to shut down its transmitter. Then will you return the officer"s gun?"
"I"m paralyzed," Herb Asher said. "I"m dead."
"If you"re dead," the speaker sputtered, "you have no need of a gun. In fact, if you"re dead, how are you going to fire the gun? You said yourself that you"re frozen. People in cryonic suspension can"t move; they"re like Lincoln Logs."
"Then tell the officer to take the gun away from me," Herb Asher said. The speaker sputtered, "Take the-"
"The gun is real," the cop said, "and Asher is real. He"s crazy. He"s not frozen. Would I arrest a dead man? Would a dead man be flying to California? There"s a warrant out on this man; he is a wanted felon."
"What are you wanted for?" the speaker sputtered. "I"m talking to you, Mr. Asher. I"m talking to a dead man who"s frozen stiff at zero degrees."
"Much colder than that," Herb Asher said. "Ask them to play the Mahler Second Symphony. And play it the way it was originally written; not an all-string verson. I can"t stand any more of this all-string music, this easy-listening music. It"s not easy for me. At one time I had to listen to Fiddler on the Roof for months. "Matchmaker, Matchmaker" lasted for days. And it was at a very critical time in my cycle; I was-"
"All right," the speaker sputtered reasonably. "What do you say to this? We"ll have the FM station play the Mahler Second Symphony and in exchange you"ll return the officer"s gun. What is the- Wait a minute." Silence.
"There"s a lapse of logic here," the cop beside Herb Asher said. "You"re falling into his idee fixe. You know what I"m hearing? I"m hearingfo/ie deux. This has got to stop. There is no FM transmitter broadcasting South Pacific. If there were, I would hear it. You can"t call the station-any station-and have them play the Mahler Second; it won"t work."
The speaker sputtered, "But he"ll think so, you stupid son of a b.i.t.c.h."
"Oh," the cop said.
"Give me a few minutes, Mr. Asher," the speaker sputtered, "to get hold-"
"No," Herb Asher said. "It"s a trick. I won"t give up the gun." To the cop beside him he said, "Release my car.
"Better release his car," the speaker sputtered.
"And take off the cuffs," Herb Asher said.
"You"ll really like the Mahler Second Symphony," the cop said. "It"s got a choir in it."
"Do you know what the Mahler Second has in it?" Herb Asher said. "Do you know what it"s scored for? I"ll tell you what it"s scored for. Four flutes, all alternating with piccolos, four oboes, the third and fourth alternating with English horns, an B-flat clarinet, four clarinets, the third alternating with ba.s.s clarinet, the fourth with second B-flat clarinet, four ba.s.soons, the third and fourth alternating with contraba.s.soon, ten horns, ten trumpets, four trombones-"
"Four trombones?" the cop said.
"Jesus Christ," the speaker sputtered.
"-a tuba," Herb Asher continued. "Organ, two sets of timpani, plus an additional single drum off-stage, two ba.s.s drums, one off-stage, two pairs of cymbals, one off-stage, two gongs, one of relatively high pitch, the other low, two triangles, one off- stage, a snare drum, preferably more than one, glockenspiel, bells, a Ruthe-"
"What is a "Ruthe"?" the cop beside Herb Asher asked.
"Ruthe" literally means "rod," " Herb Asher said. "It"s made of a lot of pieces of rattan; it looks like a large clothes-brush or a small broom. It"s used to play the ba.s.s drum. Mozart wrote for the Ruthe. Two harps, with two or more players to each part if possible-" He pondered. "Plus the regular orchestra, natu- rally, including a full string section. Have them use their mixing bQard to downplay the strings; I"ve heard enough strings. And be sure the two soloists, the soprano and alto, are good."
"That"s it?" the radio sputtered.
"You"ve fallen back into his delusion," the cop beside Herb Asher said.
"You know," the radio said, "he sounds rational enough. Are you sure he"s got your gun? Mr. Asher, how does it happen that you know so much about music? You seem to be quite an author- ity."
"There are two reasons," Herb Asher said. "One is due to my living on a planet in the star system CY3O-CY3OB; I operate a sophisticated bank of electronic equipment, both video and audio; I receive transmissions from the mother ship and record them and then beam them to the other domes both on my planet and on nearby planets, and I handle traffic from Fomalhaut, as well as domestic emergency traffic. And the other reason is that the prophet Elijah and I own a retail audio components store in Washington, D.C."
"Plus the fact," the cop beside Herb Asher said, "that you"re in cryonic suspension."
"All three," Herb Asher said. "Yes."
"And G.o.d tells you things," the cop said.
"Not about music," Herb Asher said. "He doesn"t have to. He did erase all my Linda Fox tapes, however. And he cooked my Linda Fox incoming-"
"There is another universe," the cop seated beside Herb Asher explained, "where this Linda Fox is incredibly famous. Mr. Asher is flying out to California to be with her. How he can manage to do that while frozen in cryonic suspension beats the h.e.l.l out of me, but those are his plans, or were his plans until I grappled him."
"I am still going there," Herb Asher said, and then realized that he had made a mistake to tell them this; now they could track him down, even if he escaped. He had done a foolish thing; he had said too much. Regarding him intently, the cop said, "I do believe that his self-monitoring circuit has notified him that he has spoken inju- diciously."
"I wondered when it would cut in," the speaker sputtered.
"Now I can"t go to the Fox," Herb Asher said. "I"m not going there. I"m going back to my dome in the CY3O-CY3OB System. You lack jurisdiction there. Also, Belial does not rule there. Yah rules there."
The cop said, "I thought you said Yah came back here and, I would presume, if he did come back here, he now rules."
"It has become obvious to me during the course of this conversation," Herb Asher said, "that he does not rule here, at least not completely. Something is wrong. I knew it when I started hearing the sappy, soupy string music. I especially knew it when you grappled me and when you told me there"s a warrant out for me. Maybe Belial has won; maybe that"s it. You are all servants of Belial. Take the cuffs off me or I"ll kill you."
The cop, reluctantly, removed the cuffs.
"It would seem to me, Mr. Asher," the speaker sputtered, "that there are internal contradictions in what you say. If you will concentrate on them you will see why you give the impres- sion of being brain-slushed. First you say one thing and then you say another. The only lucid interval in your discourse came when you discussed the Mahler Second Symphony, and that is proba- bly due, as you say, to the fact that you"re in the retail audio components business. It is a last remnant of a once intact psyche. Understand that if you go in with the officer you will not be punished; you will be treated as the lunatic that you obviously are. No judge would convict a man who says what you say."
"That"s true," the cop beside Herb Asher agreed. "All you have to do is tell the judge about G.o.d speaking to you from the bamboo bushes and you"re home free. And especially when you tell him that you"re G.o.d"s father-"
"Legal father," Herb Asher corrected.
That will make a big impression on the court," the cop said. Herb Asher said, "There is a great war being fought at this moment between G.o.d and Belial. The fate of the universe is at stake, its actual physical existence. When I took off for the West Coast I a.s.sumed-I had reason to a.s.sume-that everything was okay. Now I am not sure; now I think that something dark and awful has gone wrong. You police are the paradigm of it, the epitome. I would not have been grappled if Yah had in fact won. I will not go on to California because that would jeopardize Linda Fox. You"ll find her, of course, but she doesn"t know anything; she is-in this world, anyhow-a struggling new talent whom I was trying to help. Leave her alone. Leave me alone, too; leave us all alone. You do not know whom you serve. Do you under- stand what I"m saying? You are in the service of evil, whatever else you may think. You are machines processing an old warrant. You do not know what I"ve done, or been accused of doing, you can make no sense of what I say because you do not under- stand the situation. You are going by rules that don"t apply. This is a unique time. Unique events are taking place; unique forces are squared off against one another. I will not go to Linda Fox but on the other hand I do not know where I will go instead. Maybe Elias will know; maybe he can tell me what to do. My dream was shot down when you grappled me, and maybe her dream, too; Linda Fox"s dream. Maybe I can"t now help her become a star, as I promised. Time will tell. The outcome will determine it, the outcome of the great battle. I pity you because whatever the outcome you are destroyed; your souls are gone now. Silence.
"You are an unusual man, Mr. Asher," the cop beside him said. "Crazy or not, whatever it is that has gone wrong with you. you are one of a kind." He nodded slowly, as if deep in thought. "This is not an ordinary kind of insanity. This is not like anything I have ever seen or heard before. You talk about the whole uni- verse-more than the universe, if that is possible. You impress me and in a way you frighten me. I am sorry I grappled you, now that I have listened to you. Don"t shoot me. I"ll release your vehicle and you can fly off; I won"t pursue you. I"d like to forget what I"ve heard in the last few minutes. You talk about G.o.d and a counter-G.o.d and a terrible battle that seems to be lost, lost to the power of the counter-G.o.d, I mean. This does not fit with anything I know of or understand. Go away. I"ll forget you and you can forget about me." Wearily, the cop plucked at his metal mask.
"You can"t let him go," the speaker sputtered.
"Oh, yes I can," the cop said. "I can let him go and I can forget everything he"s said, everything I"ve heard."
"Except that it"s recorded," the speaker sputtered. The cop reached down and pressed a b.u.t.ton. "I just erased it," he said.
"I thought the battle was over," Herb Asher said. "I thought G.o.d had won. G.o.d has not won. I know that even though you are letting me go. But maybe it is a sign, your releasing me. I see some response in you, some amount of human warmth.""
"I am not a machine," the cop said.
"But will that continue to be true?" Herb Asher said. "I wonder. What will you be a week from now? A month? What will we all become? And what power do we have to affect it?"
The cop said, "I just want to get away from you, a long distance away.
"Good," Herb Asher said. "It can be arranged. Someone must tell the world the truth," he added. "The truth you know, that I told you: that G.o.d is in combat and losing. Who can do it?"
"You can," the cop said.
"No," Herb Asher said. But he knew who could. "Elijah can," he said. "It is his task; this is what he has come for, that the world will know."
"Then get him to do it," the cop said.
"I will," Herb Asher said. "That"s where I will go; back to my partner, back to Washington, D.C."
I will forego the Fox, he said to himself; that is the loss I must accept. Bitter sorrow filled him as he realized this. But it was a fact; he could not be with her now, not until later. Not until the battle had been won. As the cop ungrappled his vehicle from Herb Asher"s he said a stirange thing. "Pray for me, Mr. Asher," he said. "I will," Herb Asher said. His vehicle released, he swung it in a great looping arc, andheaded back toward Washington, D.C. The police car did not follow. The cop had kept his word.
CHAPTER 19.
From their audio shop he called Elias Tate, waking him up from deepest sleep. "Elijah," he said. "The time has come.
"What?" Elias muttered. "Is the store on fire? What are you talking about? Was there a break-in? What did we lose?"
"Unreality is coming back," Herb Asher said. "The universe has begun to dissolve. It is not the store; it is everything."
"You"re hearing the music again," Elias said.
"Yes."
"That is the sign. You are right. Something has happened, something he-they-did not expect. Herb, there has been an- other fall. And I slept. Thank G.o.d you woke me. Probably it is not in time. The accident-they allowed an accident to occur, as in the beginning. Well, thus the cycles fulfill themselves and the prophecies are complete. My own time to act has now come. Because of you I have emerged from my own forgetfulness. Our store must become a center of holiness, the temple of the world. We must patch into that FM station whose sound you hear; we must use it as it has in its own time made use of you. It will be our voice."
"What will it say?"
Elias said, "It will say, sleepers awake. That is our message to the listening world. Wake up! Yahweh is here and the battle has begun, and all your lives are in the balance; all of you now are weighed, this way or that, for better, for worse. No one escapes, even G.o.d himself, in all his manifestations. Beyond this there is no more. So rise up from the dust, you creatures, and begin; begin to live. You will live only insofar as you will fight; what you will have, if anything, you must earn, each for himself, and each now, not later. Come! This will be the tune that we will play over and over. And the world will hear, for we shall reach it all, first a little part, then the rest. For this my voice was fash- ioned at the beginning; for this I have come back to the world again and again. My voice will sound now, at this final time. Let us go. Let us begin. And hope it is not too late, that I did not sleep too long. We must be the world"s information source, speaking in all the tongues. We will be the tower that originally failed. And if we fail now, then it ends here, and sleep returns. The insipid noise that a.s.sails your ears will follow a whole world to its grave, and rust will rule and dust will rule-not for a little time but for all time and all men, even their machines; for all that lies ahead."
"Gosh," Herb Asher said.
"Observe our pitiful condition at this moment. We, you and I, know the truth but have no way to bring it to the world. With the station we will have a way; we will have the way. What are the call letters of that station? I will fone them and offer to buy them."
"It"s WORP FM," Herb Asher said.