Chapter 840 Did You Have s.e.x with Her?
“If you hadn’t come back, you would really have been beaten to death in Mount Qinling.”
The old faker added, “I am not invincible.”
Li Mu sat down, took a sip of tea, and then said, “You overwhelmingly defeated the people of the major Divine Clans of the Celestial Court back then, didn’t you? Is there anyone more powerful than you? In my opinion, those mobs from the major Divine Clans of the Celestial Court are not good people. Why don’t you take action and beat them up again? Only in this way can you ensure that they will toe the line.”
Cloud Light Saintess stood at the door of the meditation room, her eyelids twitching.
“Li Mu is so cruel. He’s inciting his master to do evil.”
The old faker said, “I’m too old to solve problems with my fists. I need to cultivate virtue now. It’s not good to keep fighting and killing. Otherwise, why would I practice hand-to-hand meditation? I have to leave a way out for the others.”
“How pretentious he is!”
Li Mu was at a loss for words.
“Where’s the dog?” the old faker asked.
Li Mu said, “As soon as he came back to Randengsi Village, he went out to find his old lovers. I’ve heard that many dogs in the village have become demons. My dog wants to rebuild its army of stray dogs. Otherwise, his t.i.tle of ‘General’ would be wasted.”
The old faker fell into deep thought when he heard that. “Well, that’s interesting. Sure enough, a dog can’t change its behavior. Your dog has awakened, and he is now exactly the same as he was back then.”
“Huh?” Li Mu asked, “Back then? Awakening? Did the General do anything else that I was not aware of?”
The old faker chuckled. He said, “I’m talking about the time when he stirred up trouble in Randengsi Village with a pack of domestic and stray dogs.”
“I feel that you are intentionally hiding something from me,” Li Mu said suspiciously.
The old faker said seriously, “Am I? We are like blood brothers. How could I hide anything from you?”
Cloud Light Saintess, who was outside the meditation room, didn’t know what to say when she heard that.
“Aren’t they master and disciple?
“How could they be blood brothers?”
Li Mu felt ashamed.
“He’s so casual about our positions in the family hierarchy.”
“I have a feeling that the General had experienced something extraordinary. Otherwise, he wouldn’t have become so powerful. On the way here, I heard that he even swallowed some masters in the Upper King Realm. Even if an ordinary Husky could evolve due to the outburst of Spiritual Qi of Heaven and Earth, it would still be impossible for it to evolve to such an extent. I feel that my dog has a kind of terrifying power... Moreover, he likes to claim himself to be my owner and calls me his human pet now. It seems that someone has taught him to behave like that.”
Li Mu told the old faker about his doubts.
Cloud Light Saintess who was outside the meditation room p.r.i.c.ked up her ears to listen carefully.
The background of the dog was a mystery among pract.i.tioners in the eastern region and even the whole world. The people of various major Divine Clans greatly feared this fierce demon dog. For a time, no one could subdue the dog when the masters of the older generation did not take action.
The old faker glanced at Li Mu and said, “That’s what I want to ask you. What has the dog gone through after leaving Earth? Why has he become so fierce and cruel?”
Li Mu looked at the old faker suspiciously and said, “You really don’t know why, do you?”
The old faker nodded.
“Fine.” Li Mu slipped into deep thought. “Could it be that this dog came across some rare opportunities in the Everlasting Heaven and became more powerful because of that?
“After all, he is the first dog on Earth to walk out of the Milky Way Galaxy.”
Li Mu decided not to dwell on the question anymore.
He told the old faker the secrets he had learned from Bi Yan.
“The G.o.ds of the six major clans of traitorous devils have descended to Earth, but the major Divine Clans don’t know that. I’m afraid there will be a disaster in the near future.” He was quite worried when talking about this matter.
The old faker said, “It turns out that those old monsters are still alive and have returned to Earth. Well, the Earth will become a very lively place this time. I’m afraid that something interesting will happen in just a few days.”
Li Mu looked at the old faker in surprise. “Something interesting? It seems that you’re not worried at all. Why?”
The old faker said in an even more surprised tone of voice, “Why should I worry?”
Li Mu said, “The G.o.ds of the major clans of traitorous devils have already descended to Earth. They’ll surely bring great disaster. If they really destroy this planet... Back then, you sent me out because you wanted me to protect Earth, didn’t you?”
“Really?” The old faker rubbed the back of his head and said, “How could I forget?”
Li Mu was almost driven mad. He said, “What the f*ck! Why don’t you want to keep your word? It seems that you don’t want to admit what you have done. Please don’t make any trouble.”
The old faker said with a smile, “Well, even if I really said that back then, it would still be possible that I said the wrong thing. I said so much, and you just remembered one thing. How did you learn politics in junior high school? According to Karl Marx’s theory, you should look at problems from the perspective of dynamic dialectic. Everything is constantly changing. I initially thought Earth would be destroyed, but now, it seems that it’s not necessarily the case.”
Li Mu’s face darkened.
“d.a.m.n it. Are you kidding me?
“Why are you studying Marxist philosophy?
“That’s basically materialism, which is naturally inconsistent with what you do.”
“By the way, did you just say that the two key fragments are missing?” The old faker immediately changed the subject when he saw the strange look on Li Mu’s face. “Boy, you have really experienced too many unwanted encounters. Why do you have to pretend to be a romantic lover? You were cheated by a Fox Spirit, and she took the treasures away from you. Do you want to make me laugh to death?”
Li Mu suddenly blushed.
“Can you say that all affairs between men and women are lies?” He immediately changed the subject as the old faker did. “By the way, there is another very strange thing. Eight cracks have appeared in my spine and they haven’t healed after a long time. I don’t know why.”
“Cracks in your spine?” The old faker continued, “Are you kidding me? The ‘Zhenwu Boxing’ that you practice was created by Divine Emperor Ye. Even if there really were cracks in your spine, they should have healed long ago unless...”
He suddenly paused at this point.
Li Mu asked, “Unless what?”
“Let me have a look first.” The old faker looked serious.
He put his hands on Li Mu’s shoulders.
...
A few moments later, the old faker withdrew his hands and said, “It’s a Taoist injury.”
“A Taoist injury?” Li Mu froze for a moment and then asked, “What’s that?”
The old faker said, “Did you fight with any master in the Great Way Realm? Tell me about it. How did you get injured?”
Li Mu felt a little confused when he heard that. He said, “If I had fought with any master in the Great Way Realm, I wouldn’t have returned alive. I got injured in the battle behind the Gate of the Ancestors...”
He recounted what he had experienced.
“How is that possible? How could those f*cking successors of the Divine Clans inflict a Taoist injury on you?” The old faker couldn’t believe it. “Are you hiding something from me? Could it be that you got beaten by that Fox Spirit but feel too embarra.s.sed to tell me?” The old faker was confused.
Li Mu shook his head and said, “How could that be possible? Bi Yan can’t even defeat Yunguang...”
As he spoke, he suddenly thought of something strange.
“Well, I ate the fish she cooked for me and slept for three days and three nights. Logically speaking, it’s impossible for me to sleep for that long. Oh, the cracks in my spine already existed before that. It’s impossible...”
Li Mu told the old faker about the strange thing he recalled.
“How could a few fish make you sleep for three days and three nights? Do you think they’re like the knockout drops described in martial arts novels?” The old faker continued, “I think you’ve gone crazy over love. There must be something wrong with that Fox Spirit. Oh, by the way, what is she? The Green Fox G.o.d? Is she a deity?”
Li Mu thought for a moment and then said, “Well, she should be.”
The old faker said, “Okay. Boy, you’re quite good at picking up girls, but you have actually hit on a demon G.o.d. Tell me the truth. Did you have s.e.x with her?”
“Huh?” Li Mu gawked at the old faker.
The old faker winked and said, “What? Are you pretending to be innocent?”
Li Mu said helplessly, “Can you... can you stop being so nasty? You’re at least a so-called external G.o.d. Can’t you talk properly? What on earth is a Taoist injury? Is it serious?”
The old faker said, “Forget it. I was just curious... Well, a Taoist injury is an injury of the Great Way that causes damage to your Source Energy. If the injury doesn’t heal, it will be impossible for you to go any further down the path of martial arts practice for the rest of your life. It can destroy your martial arts foundation. Now, you can tell me if it’s serious.”
Li Mu was taken aback. “How... what should I do to make it heal?”
“If it happened earlier, it would be very easy to treat, and I would be able to treat it for you. Now, I can no longer help you. It’s just that I’ve been practicing hand-to-hand meditation recently, so there’s nothing I can do to help you.” The old faker added, “You need the help of a master in the Great Way Realm to heal it.”
“A master in the Great Way Realm?”
Li Mu had a headache after he heard what the old faker said.
The old faker was the only master in the Great Way Realm that Li Mu knew, but he was practicing silent meditation and refused to take action. There might be masters in the Great Way Realm among the people of the six major Divine Clans and the branches of the Celestial Court, but it seemed impossible that they would help Li Mu. Those people, especially the people of the six major Divine Clans, couldn’t wait to see Li Mu die in the wilderness right away.
“Well, you don’t have to worry. Besides masters in the Great Way Realm, top-grade immortal fruits can also help you recover, but you’ll have to find some first.” The old faker continued, “Such fruits can even make you stronger. It is said that there are medicinal herbs and immortal fruits in the gardens of the immortal palace, and in the legendary Immortal Peach Garden, there are immortal peaches. One peach is enough to cure you.”
“Top-grade immortal fruits?”
Li Mu tried to recall the fruits he had seen. Among all the fruits he saw when he explored various secret realms, perhaps only the ginseng fruit in the Five Villages Temple could be regarded as a kind of top-grade immortal fruit. He ate ginseng fruits, but they had no effect. He knew of some immortal herbs that were magical, but they were far inferior to top-grade immortal fruits.
“Hey, now that the six major clans of traitorous devils have successfully descended to Earth, the six keys will surely be collected and put together. The opening of the Immortal Palace is just a matter of time.” The old faker did some calculations with his fingers. No one knew what he had figured out. He continued, “Boy, you have experienced too many unwanted encounters. Otherwise, with two keys in your hands, you would surely have a place in the immortal palace. Now, you just need to wait patiently for an opportunity.”
Li Mu said, “The six major Divine Clans and the major branches of the Celestial Court have not collected all the keys yet. Two of them are in Bi Yan’s hands. I’m afraid that the opening of the Immortal Palace is a long way off.”
The old faker said with a smile, “How could that be possible? You don’t know that the opening of the immortal palace depends on time. Once you miss the right time, it would be very difficult to open it even if you had the keys. Neither the G.o.ds of the major clans of traitorous devils nor the people of various branches of the Celestial Court want to miss the right time. Although there were some conflicts between them, they will eventually come up with a solution.”