_Mari._ Oh! oh! oh! [_MARIANNE faints in LADY WAITFOR"T"S Arms._

_Lady._ Oh! I have gone too far, Mr Vapid!

_Vapid._ I fly, I"ll call the servants. Have you got any drops?

_Lady._ I have some drops in this closet may recover her--hold her a moment, and for heaven"s sake take care of her. [_Exit._

[_MARIANNE lays in VAPID"S Arms._

_Vapid._ Here"s a situation!--Poor girl!--how I pity her! I really loved her.

_Mari._ Did you really love me, Mr Vapid?

_Vapid._ Hey-day! recovered!--here"s incident!

_Mari._ But did you really love me, Mr Vapid?

_Vapid._ Yes I did,--here"s stage effect!

_Mari._ And would you have really run away with me, Mr Vapid?

_Vapid._ Yes, I really would.

_Mari._ Then come along this moment.

_Vapid._ Hush!--here"s the old lady! keep dying, as before, and we"ll effect the business--more equivoque!

_Enter LADY WAITFOR"T._

_Lady._ Well, Mr Vapid, how does she do? lord! she"s in strong convulsions.

_Vapid._ Yes, ma"am, she"s dying; where are the drops?

_Lady._ Here, sir.

_Vapid._ There are very few--are there any more of the same kind?

_Lady._ Yes, plenty.

_Vapid._ Fetch them,--"tis the only hope--if you have any hartshorn too, bring a little of that.

_Lady._ I"m quite shocked! [_Exit._

_Mari._ Well, Mr Vapid, now let"s run away--come--why what are you thinking of?

_Vapid._ My last act, and I fear--

_Mari._ What do you fear?

_Vapid._ That it can"t be managed--let me see--we certainly run away, and she returns--"faith, I must see her return.

_Mari._ No, no, pray let us begone, think of this another time.

_Vapid._ So I will--it will do for the fourth, though not for the fifth act,--therefore, my dear little girl, come away, and we"ll live and die together.

_Mari._ Die together!

_Vapid._ Ay, "Die all! die n.o.bly! die like demi-G.o.ds!" [_Exeunt._

_Enter LADY WAITFOR"T._

_Lady._ Here, Mr Vapid--here are the drops!--What, gone!--ruined by a writer of epilogues!--Oh! I shall burst with disappointment! [_Exit._

SCENE II.

_Another Apartment in NEVILLE"S House--In the back Scene, Gla.s.s Doors, with Curtains._

_Enter LOUISA COURTNEY._

_Louisa._ Still in the same house, yet still afraid to meet him! Oh, Neville! my superior in every thing; how can I hope for your forgiveness? while you revealed an affection it had done you credit to deny, I concealed a pa.s.sion I might have been proud to confess.

_Enter VAPID and MARIANNE._

_Mari._ Oh! Miss Courtney! my sweet Miss Courtney! Mr Vapid, here, has run away with me, and I am so frightened for fear of Lady Waitfor"t.

_Louisa._ Yes, she may well alarm you,--she has destroyed my peace for ever! but have you seen Mr Neville? yet, why do I ask!

_Vapid._ Seen Mr Neville!--What, doesn"t he yet know you are in his lodgings?

_Louisa._ No, and I hope never will--the moment his brother returns, I shall set out for my uncle"s, and perhaps never see him more.

_Vapid._ And why not see him, ma"am?

_Louisa._ Because I cannot bear the sight of one I have so injured.

_Vapid._ This"ll do--mutual equivoque! equal misunderstanding! my own case exactly!

_Mari._ Your own case! Lord! you base man, have you got a young lady in your lodgings?

_Vapid._ Ridiculous! don"t talk about young ladies at such an awful--the very situation in my comedy! the last scene to a syllable!--here"s an opportunity of improving the denouement!

_Enter PETER._

_Peter._ Ma"am, my master is returned--the occasion of his delay has been a long interview with Mr Willoughby,--he doesn"t know you are here.

_Louisa._ Marianne, excuse me--you"ll be safe from Lady Waitfor"t here--indeed I"m very ill.

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