XVI
Breakfast Margaret enjoyed hugely. I regret to confess that the fact that every one of her guests was more or less miserable moved this hard-hearted young woman to untimely and excessive mirth. Only Mrs.
Saumarez puzzled her, for she could think of no reason for that lady"s manifest agitation when Kathleen eventually joined the others.
But for the rest, the hopeless glances that Hugh Van Orden cast toward her caused Adele to flush, and Mrs. Haggage to become despondent and speechless and astonishingly rigid; and Petheridge Jukesbury"s vaguely apologetic att.i.tude toward the world struck Miss Hugonin as infinitely diverting. Kennaston she pitied a little; but his bearing toward her ranged ludicrously from that of proprietorship to that of supplication, and, moreover, she was furious with him for having hinted at various times that Billy was a fortune-hunter.
Margaret was quite confident by this that she had never believed him--"not really, you know"--having argued the point out at some length the night before, and reaching her conclusion by a course of reasoning peculiar to herself.
Mr. Woods, as you may readily conceive, was sunk in the Slough of Despond deeper than ever plummet sounded. Margaret thought this very nice of him; it was a delicate tribute to her that he ate nothing; and the fact that Hugh Van Orden and Petheridge Jukesbury--as she believed--acted in precisely the same way for precisely the same reason, merely demonstrated, of course, their overwhelming conceit and presumption.
So sitting in the great Eagle"s shadow, she ate a quant.i.ty of marmalade--she was wont to begin the day in this unG.o.dly English fashion--and gossiped like a brook trotting over sunlit pebbles. She had planned a pulverising surprise for the house-party; and in due time, she intended to explode it, and subsequently Billy was to apologise for his conduct, and then they were to live happily ever afterward.
She had not yet decided what he was to apologise for; that was his affair. His conscience ought to have told him, by this, wherein he had offended; and if his conscience hadn"t, why then, of course, he would have to apologise for his lack of proper sensibility.
After breakfast she went, according to her usual custom, to her father"s rooms, for, as I think I have told you, the old gentleman was never visible until noon. She had astonishing news for him.
What time she divulged it, the others sat on the terrace, and Mr.
Kennaston read to them, as he had promised, from his "Defense of Ignorance." It proved a welcome diversion to more than one of the party. Mr. Woods, especially, esteemed it a G.o.dsend; it staved off misfortune for at least a little; so he sat at Kathleen"s side in silence, trying desperately to be happy, trying desperately not to see the tiny wrinkles, the faint crow"s feet Time had sketched in her face as a memorandum of the work he meant to do shortly.
Billy consoled himself with the reflection that he was very fond of her; but, oh (he thought), what worship, what adoration he could accord this woman if she would only decline--positively--to have anything whatever to do with him!
I think we ought not to miss hearing Mr. Kennaston"s discourse. It is generally conceded that his style is wonderfully clever; and I have no doubt that his detractors--who complain that his style is mere word-twisting, a mere inversion of the most ancient truisms--are actuated by the very basest jealousy. Let us listen, then, and be duly edified as he reads in a low, sweet voice, and the birds twitter about him in the clear morning.
"It has been for many years," Mr. Kennaston began, "the custom of patriotic gentlemen in quest of office to point with pride to the fact that the schoolmaster is abroad in the land, in whose defense they stand pledged to draw their salaries and fight to the last gasp for reelection. These lofty plat.i.tudes, while trying to the lungs, doubtless appeal to a certain cla.s.s of minds. But, indeed, the schoolmaster is not abroad; he is domesticated in every village in America, where each hamlet has its would-be Shakespeare, and each would-be Shakespeare has his "Hamlet" by heart. Learning is rampant in the land, and valuable information is pasted up in the streetcars so that he who rides may read.
"And Ignorance--beautiful, divine Ignorance--is forsaken by a generation that clamours for the truth. And what value, pray, has this Truth that we should l.u.s.t after it?"
He glanced up, in an inquiring fashion. Mr. Jukesbury, meeting his eye, smiled and shook his head and said "Fie, fie!" very placidly.
To do him justice, he had not the least idea what Kennaston was talking about.
"I am aware," the poet continued, with an air of generosity, "that many pleasant things have been said of it. In fact, our decade has turned its back relentlessly upon the decayed, and we no longer read the lament over the lost art of lying issued many magazines ago by a once prominent British author. Still, without advancing any Wilde theories, one may fairly claim that truth is a jewel--a jewel with many facets, differing in appearance from each point of view.
"And while "Tell the truth and shame the Devil" is a very pretty sentiment, it need not necessarily mean anything. The Devil, if there be a personal devil--and it has been pointed out, with some show of reason, that an impersonal one could scarcely carry out such enormous contracts--would, in all probability, rather approve than otherwise of indiscriminate truth-telling. Irritation is the root of all evil; and there is nothing more irritating than to hear the truth about one"s self. It is bad enough, in all conscience, to be insulted, but the truth of an insult is the barb that prevents its retraction. "Truth hurts" has all the pathos of understatement. It not only hurts, but infuriates. It has no more right to go naked in public than any one else. Indeed, it has less right; for truth-telling is natural to mankind--as is shown by its prevalence among the younger sort, such as children and cynics--and, as Shakespeare long ago forgot to tell us, a touch of nature makes the whole world embarra.s.sed."
At this point Mrs. Haggage sniffed. She considered he was growing improper. She distrusted Nature.
"Truth-telling, then, may safely be regarded as an unamiable indiscretion. In art, the bare truth must, in common gallantry, be awarded a print petticoat or one of canvas, as the case may be, to hide her nakedness; and in life, it is a disastrous virtue that we have united to commend and avoid. Nor is the decision an unwise one; for man is a gregarious animal, knowing that friendship is, at best, but a feeble pa.s.sion and therefore to be treated with the care due an invalid. It is impossible to be quite candid in conversation with a man; and with a woman it is absolutely necessary that your speech should be candied.
"Truth, then, is the least desirable of acquaintances.
"But even if one wished to know the truth, the desire could scarcely be fulfilled. Francis Bacon, Lord Verulam, a prominent lawyer of Elizabeth"s time, who would have written Shakespeare"s plays had his other occupations not prevented it, quotes Pilate as inquiring, "What is Truth?"--and then not staying for an answer. Pilate deserves all the praise he has never received. Nothing is quite true. Even Truth lies at the bottom of a well and not infrequently in other places. No a.s.sertion is one whit truer than its opposite."
A mild buzz of protest rose about him. Kennaston smiled and c.o.c.ked his head on one side.
"We have, for example," he pointed out, "a large number of proverbs, the small coin of conversation, received everywhere, whose value no one disputes. They are rapped forth, like an oath, with an air of settling the question once and forever. Well! there is safety in quotations. But even the Devil can cite Shakespeare for his purpose.
"Never put off till to-morrow what you can do to-day" agrees ill with "Sufficient unto the day is the evil thereof"; and it is somewhat difficult to reconcile "Take care of the pence, and the pounds will take care of themselves" with the equally familiar "Penny-wise, pound-foolish." Yet the sayings are equally untrue; any maxim is, perforce, a general statement, and therefore fallacious, and therefore universally accepted. Art is long, and life is short, but the plat.i.tudes concerning them are both insufferable and eternal. We must remember that a general statement is merely a snap-shot at flying truth, an instantaneous photograph of a moving body. It may be the way that a thing is; but it is never the way in which any one ever saw that thing, or ever will. This is, of course, a general statement.
"As to present events, then, it may be a.s.sumed that no one is either capable or desirous of speaking the truth; why, then, make such a pother about it as to the past? There we have carried the investigation of truth to such an extreme that nowadays very few of us dare believe anything. Opinions are difficult to secure when a quarter of an hour in the library will prove either side of any question.
Formerly, people had a few opinions, which, if erroneous, were at least universal. Nero was not considered an immaculate man. The Flood was currently believed to have caused the death of quite a number of persons. And George Washington, it was widely stated, once cut down a cherry-tree. But now all these comfortable illusions have been destroyed by "the least little men who spend their time and lose their wits in chasing nimble and retiring truth, to the extreme perturbation and drying up of the moistures.""
Kennaston looked up for a moment, and Billy Woods, who had counted seven wrinkles and was dropping into a forlorn doze, started violently. His interest then became abnormal.
"There are," Mr. Kennaston complained, rather reproachfully, "too many inquiries, doubts, investigations, discoveries, and apologies. There are palliations of Tiberius, eulogies of Henry VIII., rehabilitations of Aaron Burr. Lucretia Borgia, it appears, was a grievously misunderstood woman, and Heliogabalus a most exemplary monarch; even the dog in the manger may have been a nervous animal in search of rest and quiet. As for Shakespeare, he was an atheist, a syndicate, a lawyer"s clerk, an inferior writer, a Puritan, a scholar, a _nom de plume_, a doctor of medicine, a fool, a poacher, and another man of the same name. Information of this sort crops up on every side. Even the newspapers are infected; truth lurks in the patent-medicine advertis.e.m.e.nts, and sometimes creeps stealthily into the very editorials. We must all learn the true facts of history, whether we will or no; eventually, the writers of historical romance will not escape.
"So the sad tale goes. Ignorance--beautiful, divine Ignorance--is forsaken by a generation that clamours for the truth. The earnest-minded person has plucked Zeus out of Heaven, and driven the Maenad from the wood, and dragged Poseidon out of his deep-sea palace.
The conclaves of Olympus, it appears, are merely nature-myths; the stately legends cl.u.s.tering about them turn out to be a rather elaborate method of expressing the fact that it occasionally rains.
The heroes who endured their angers and jests and tragic loves are delicately veiled allusions to the sun--surely, a very harmless topic of conversation, even in Greece; and the monsters, "Gorgons and Hydras and Chimaeras dire," their grisly offspring, their futile opponents, are but personified frosts. Mythology--the poet"s necessity, the fertile mother of his inventions--has become a series of atmospheric phenomena, and the labours of Hercules prove to be a dozen weather bulletins.
"Is it any cause for wonder, that under this cheerless influence our poetry is either silent or unsold? The true poet must be ignorant, for information is the thief of rhyme. And it is only in dealing with--"
Kennaston paused. Margaret had appeared in the vestibule, and behind her stood her father, looking very grave.
"We have made a most interesting discovery," Miss Hugonin airily announced to the world at large. "It appears that Uncle Fred left all his property to Mr. Woods here. We found the will only last night. I"m sure you"ll all be interested to learn I"m a pauper now, and intend to support myself by plain sewing. Any work of this nature you may choose to favour me with, ladies and gentlemen, will receive my most _earnest_ attention."
She dropped a courtesy. The scene appealed to her taste for the dramatic.
Billy came toward her quickly.
"Peggy," he demanded of her, in the semi-privacy of the vestibule, "will you kindly elucidate the meaning of this da--this idiotic foolishness?"
"Why, this," she explained, easily, and exhibited a folded paper. "I found it in the grate last night."
He inspected it with large eyes. "That"s absurd," he said, at length.
"You know perfectly well this will isn"t worth the paper it"s written on."
"My dear sir," she informed him, coldly, "you are vastly mistaken. You see, I"ve burned the other one." She pushed by him. "Mr. Kennaston, are you ready for our walk? We"ll finish the paper some other time.
Wasn"t it the strangest thing in the world--?" Her dear, deep, mellow voice died away as she and Kennaston disappeared in the gardens.
Billy gasped.
But meanwhile, Colonel Hugonin had given the members of his daughter"s house-party some inkling as to the present posture of affairs. They were gazing at Billy Woods rather curiously. He stood in the vestibule of Selwoode, staring after Margaret Hugonin; but they stared at him, and over his curly head, sculptured above the door-way, they saw the Eagle--the symbol of the crude, incalculable power of wealth.
Mr. Woods stood in the vestibule of his own house.
XVII
"By gad!" said Colonel Hugonin, very grimly, "anybody would think you"d just lost a fortune instead of inheriting one! Wish you joy of it, Billy. I ain"t saying, you know, we shan"t miss it, my daughter and I--no, begad, for it"s a nice pot of money, and we"ll miss it d.a.m.nably. But since somebody had to have it, I"d much rather it was you, my boy, than a set of infernal, hypocritical, philanthropic sharks, and I"m d.a.m.n" glad Frederick has done the square thing by you--yes, begad!"
The old gentleman was standing beside Mr. Woods in the vestibule of Selwoode, some distance from the other members of the house-party, and was speaking in confidence. He was sincere; I don"t say that the thought of facing the world at sixty-five with practically no resources save his half-pay--I think I have told you that the Colonel"s diversions had drunk up his wife"s fortune and his own like a gla.s.s of water--I don"t say that this thought moved him to hilarity.
Over it, indeed, he pulled a frankly grave face.
But he cared a deal for Billy; and even now there was balm--soothing, priceless balm--to be had of the reflection that this change in his prospects affected materially the prospects of those cultured, broad-minded, philanthropic persons who had aforetime set his daughter to requiring of him a perusal of Herbert Spencer.
Billy was pretty well aware how monetary matters stood with the old wastrel; and the sincerity of the man affected him far more than the most disinterested sentiments would have done. Mr. Woods accordingly shook hands, with entirely unnecessary violence.