"Perhaps you are correct," she answered. "I shall think on it. I do thank you for your thoughts. I have never had a friend, much less a brother, before."
Her sincerity touched him. "I will always be happy and willing to be of a.s.sistance." Dr. Ames flicked the
reins, prodded the horse from its slow plod.
A comradely silence engulfed the pair for the remainder of the journey. Soon Kentoncombe was before them-a blaze of light in the darkness. Seeing that men awaited the arrival of the carriage, Joanne laid her hand upon Ames"s arm. "You will not speak of what I have told you?" she asked.
"Not if you do not wish me to."
"Oh, thank you. I would be quite out of charity with you if you did."
"And we mustn"t have that," he teased lightly as he drew the horse to a halt before Kentoncombe"s door.
"Oh, mustn"t we," returned Joanne archly and both shared the laughter of a common jest not noticing
Lord Jason had emerged and watched.
He took in their happy faces and shared laughter, saw Joanne"s hand resting on Ames"s arm. A deep sorrow settled upon his heart, blotted out the faint hope it held.
Chapter Fourteen.
The crisp cool air of fall turned into the chillier winds of winter. Joanne chose to follow Dr. Ames"s advice, but none could fail to notice the increased effort she put into her lessons. while avoiding any conversation on the subject of Joanne.
Only observation of Kenton at unguarded moments continued to convince Ames that Lord Jason kept his true feelings for Lady Joanne under tight rein.
Mrs. Caern watched the trio with growing unease. Only Lady Joanne remained unaware, not comprehending the undercurrents about her, certain she had found a subst.i.tute father.
Meticulously following the exercise and dietary course set by Kenton Joanne slimmed even more.
Shortly after Christmas the dressmaker was summoned to Kentoncombe once more.
This dear lady was sadly confused when she came from Joanne"s bedchamber. Mrs. Caern had directed her to measure and discuss styles for the young lady"s day gowns, pelisses, evening gowns, and many smaller items-so many in fact that the seamstress had been somewhat concerned at the size of the task.
Lady Knoll, however, had just told her to make only three day gowns, one warm and durable, and one gown for evening wear.
Imagine a young lady wanting something durable? Worse still, Lady Joanne had selected common materials, not at all the sort the gentry chose for putting on airs. Uncertain of what to do, Mrs. Daniels paused worriedly outside the coat-of-arms chamber door.
Lord Jason, coming from his study, approached her.
The st.u.r.dy little seamstress bobbed a hasty curtsy.
Seeing she was upset, he halted. "Mrs. Daniels, is it not? Can I be of help?"
"It concerns her ladyship"s instructions, milord. Mrs. Caern told me there would be a large number of gowns and other articles to be made and that they were to be of the finer materials. But Lady Knoll ordered only four gowns and these of my least costly cloth."
Brow furrowed in puzzlement, Kenton pondered the seamstress"s news. "You have all the measurements needed for any gown?" he asked.
"Oh, yes, milord."
"Then I suggest you begin on one of the gowns Lady Knoll ordered and delay starting on the remainder until a message is sent to you. A minor misunderstanding seems exist."
"Thank you, milord." Mrs. Daniels gave him a relieved smile. "I best be going." Bobbing another quick curtsy, she went briskly on her way.
Remaining before Joanne"s chamber door, Kenton deliberated on the cause behind Joanne"s orders to the seamstress. That she has decided to wed Ames came first to mind.
No, he reasoned, that makes no sense, for she believes her father pays for the garments. What can be her reason for so miserly a choice? upon her door.
The rein he had kept upon his heart was sorely tried by the image he met upon the door"s opening. A deep lavender morning gown, simply cut and unadorned, was wrapped around Joanne"s figure, revealing the natural bodylines. His eyes followed the soft curves with a hunger long suppressed. Her brown hair hung in soft velvet waves upon her shoulders. A maidenly blush heightened her looks as her brown eyes widened in surprise.
"Lord Jason, I had no idea. I thought it must be Mrs. Daniels. We just finished-" she sought to explain why she was not dressed at such a late morning hour.
"I know," he acknowledged, his thoughts far from his words. "I just spoke with her. In fact what she told me makes me admit to some puzzlement."
Words faded from thought as he feasted, his heart raced. All his reasoning and suppressing had done naught. Love pulsed so strongly, he was certain she must see it, feel it. How was it to be denied?
Unknowingly he stepped closer. Standing before him, guileless, she drew him with a pa.s.sion he had hoped to deny. Kenton cursed. Circ.u.mstances bound him, moral precepts held him fast in speech and act to the sham of a tutor.
Taking in his gaze, Joanne again experienced the strange flutter of excitement that came whenever he was near. Odd that he should appear before my door just when I am trying to puzzle through my growing need to be close to him, she thought. Her pulse quickened. She longed to reach out and touch his face.
The desire to be held once more in his arms consumed her.
Neither was aware of Kenton"s incomplete thought, as they stood wrapped in the torment of desire.
Lord Jason"s discipline broke under the strain. For a moment pa.s.sion flickered in his steady brown eyes.
An answering spirit leaped within Joanne. She leaned toward him. The anger that flashed into his eyesseared her. What have I done wrong? she asked despairingly.
Joanne"s look of total vulnerability tested Kenton too far. If he stayed a moment more he would take her in his arms. "Come to my study when you have dressed," he blurted like a schoolboy, turned on heel and fled with as much dignity as his hammering heart allowed.
Reaching his study, he paced; mentally recited the litany of his foolishness. The tolerability of the situation had been broken at last. From the night he had rescued Joanne and held her in his arms he had been forced to admit his love. The caress of his name on her lips, the love in her eyes, and the intimacy of her manner loosened his stranglehold on a hope he held futile.
Did she love him? With crushing clarity the question was answered by Joanne"s naive eagerness to please. It came, not surprisingly but quelling to his heart, that she viewed him as a father; that her trust was centred in thinking of him as such. In becoming her tutor he had contrived a gaol for his own love.
He shook himself and glanced at the letter lying open upon the desk before him. His lips tightened into a frown.
No ordinary missive that, he thought, but the tool of reality. In a surge of anger Kenton crumpled the letter.
fact. It is time to halt the self-pity, he told himself. Think of Joanne"s welfare.
He had debated ignoring the date set by Furness for Joanne"s journey to London, but the power of the law was behind the earl. He could demand and procure Joanne"s return. A confrontation with her father would crush Joanne"s new self-confidence, Kenton was certain. He could not simply send her to the man.
Neither would having her remain at Kentoncombe do, he realized, after this morn. To have her stay would ultimately test him too far. A time would come when he would not be able to restrain himself. He could not bear it if Joanne came to distrust him-to hate him because of it. In no way was she responsible for the trap he now found himself in. She was innocent of enticement. The few sallies he had weakly ventured had all been met with questioning puzzlement on her part.
During the past two months Kenton had come to know much of Joanne"s childhood. He marvelled at how matter-of-factly she spoke, often not realizing what she revealed. Knowledge of Lord Furness" treatment of his daughter ended hopes Kenton had harboured that he might yet speak to her of his love. Vilely misused by her natural father, it was unalterably confirmed in Kenton"s mind that Joanne could only be harmed further if the daughterly trust she had placed in him was betrayed.
Lord, you"re almost of an age to be her father, he sarcastically reminded himself. Besides, there are far better prospects than you can offer awaiting her in London.
A light tapping aroused Kenton. It must be Joanne. He would do as his conscience bid him. "Enter," he called out.
Joanne walked slowly into the room and sat in the chair beside his desk. The onslaught of emotion had left her shaken, confused. Questions tumbled through her mind. The realization that she loved Lord Jason, not as a father, but as a man, smote her.
The peculiarity of her recent emotions had become crystal clear. A second realization had hit with sickening force.
He has thrown Benjamin and me together constantly these two months past, she thought, and turned cold and proper. Does he wish to be rid of me even to the extent of forcing a match with Benjamin? She now tremulously awaited Kenton"s words.
"I must ask you a question," he began slowly. "It is personal," he dropped his gaze for a moment, then raised it to met hers, "but, as I have a.s.sumed responsibility for your welfare, I must have an answer. Do you have a tendre for Ames?" He ended in a rush, glad to have it out.
"I care for Benjamin as I would a brother, had I one," Joanne answered, her gaze not wavering from Kenton"s. She would not be forced into a match.
"You have no desire to wed him?" he persisted.
"No," she clipped out thinking that he did hope to be rid of her as she had thought.
"I see." Lord Jason drummed his fingers upon the desk. Then he reached out and drew forward a large leather-bound book from one side and opened it to a marked page. As he looked at the page before him, Kenton asked, "Do you know of family other than your aunt, Lady Evelyn?" "I have received a letter from your father." Lord Jason winced when she blanched. "He seeks news of your progress."
"Why?" she asked coldly.
"The time set for you to leave Kentoncombe draws near."
"Leave?" Joanne raised her hand to still the sudden pounding of her heart. "Surely you do not wish me to
depart?
"Has the money he left been spent? If so I can do without the new gowns and-there must be some way-something I can do to earn my way here," she pleaded.
Kenton steeled his heart. "It is not a question of money. It was set before your arrival that you would
stay only till March. You were to learn what you would need to know for a London season in that time."