The Employed Empress

Wei Yi Yi relates. 

b.l.o.o.d.y murder echoes within her whole being at this very moment.

Sadly, R18 is inappropriate content for Jiang Chen. Leaving a look of "pray that we don"t meet at dark alleys", Wei Yi Yi simply took the child away.

Wei Yi Yi almost sprints to her small bubble, shuts down the world, and burrows under her quilt. 

Those silly mothers, both biological and stepmothers, all wrote freedom like it"s humanity"s goal! This brother will tell you once, adulting is scary, the outside is full of pits, and society is digging more for you to jump!

A real adult likes her home the most, loathing the fact they needed to zombie thru work. First off, all your things are within reach at home. Also, it"s the age where you find just anyone annoying.

Right, especially one like her boss!

Argh. This bro wants to close the gates, wants a ma.s.sage, wants a vacation, wants to be a salted fish.

Bro is so tired. This one declared that she is bro.

"Aunt," Jiang Chen tug Wei Yi Yi back to earth. 

His face downcast with conflicting emotions, pulling back and front his lips, undecided how he"s going to pout. "I… Ah Chen patiently waited for auntie."

Wei Yi Yi jaw dropped. "Are you boosting that you"re obedient? What? You"re not tsun-tsun today?"

Heat crept in his face and Jiang Chen planted his face on Wei Yi Yi"s dress. 

"Lil" one, you dressed so grand today." She teased him. Rather than embarra.s.sed, a blus.h.i.+ng Lil" One looks like an overstuffed sus.h.i.+. 

"Your cuteness is so pure. So holy. I literally cannot. It makes me want to nom-nom-nom your cheeks." Wei Yi Yi picked Jiang Chen and rubbed their cheeks together. "R.I.P"

Indeed, R.I.P.. Apologies for Wei Yi Yi. Her mind has already filed for leave. At least in her inner world, she has collapsed.

After being conscious of her words for more than half a month, Wei Yi Yi flipped back to the norm and even descended to the braindead level, speaking incoherent words.

Jiang Chen: "????"

"Hehe. Ah Chen, I"m back!"

Wei Yi Yi was still all smiles and laughing. Already considering what happened a few minutes before as "the past", and moving on.

Who knows, it was her last bolt of energy.

With their mistress back, speaking positively, Xian Feng palace turned as lively as ever.  

But then, speaking without pretense, the empress stressed them out.

One foot at the doors and she suddenly went:

"I"ll just go melt in here."

"I"m deflating. My battery runs out. Someone just drag me."

"This number cannot be reached. 404 not found. Don"t talk to me."

How could they leave their mistress? Of course, they immediately coax her. But the empress then started crying out for "ice cream" and "soda".

No one understood her heart. Wei Yi Yi groaned pitifully. "I"m dying," she said and curled up to a ball.

Servants: !!!!

The empress is having a breakdown!

Eyes popping out and jaws dropping, the Xian Feng palace was thrown into turmoil! It was different from the usual flying chicken and dogs jumping they faced.

From her ball of defence, they heard the empress" m.u.f.fled voice. "Shut up. I"m drowning from the red tide." 

"Ah?"

In a while, with much baby talk, sweat and effort, and Tang Mei carrying the empress, they were able to roll her into the bath.

"So painful ah! It"s really painful! This is killing me. I"ll be a bloated fish at this rate!... Wait! Wait! Ah Mei don"t call for the doctor! I"m lying! I"m such a liar! It"s not painful at all! Just uncomfortable! Tang Mei!"

As a result, Wei Yi Yi successfully landed herself as a patient once again. On a side note, she acquired her vacation. Sadly, in bed.

This timing would undoubtedly stir rumors. However, with Wei Yi Yi"s previous performance and history of health, as well as how the empress and emperor acted harmoniously in the public, malicious rumors easily died out.

Wei Lian who was preparing melons expressed dissatisfaction. 

But then he thought of the hunting stampede accident being investigated and decided not to replace this hot topic. Rather, it would be better to stir up the victimized young masters. That way, the court would be pressured to retrain their face. 

During these days, Wei Yi Yi told Jiang Chen her experience with a broken timeline, sidetracked more than nine times, and added a few comments back and forth. 

Like how she might have kinks she didn"t have or accepting the fact that she"s a face-con at some point.

Or that she has proven that she might be the living proof that one can be both smart and slow as fudge at the same time.

It all included sketchy things that were doubtfully allowed to be told to a kid. Not like it was not known that Wei Yi Yi sometimes lost her morals at some places.

Ultimately the main points got lost along the conversation. 

Wei Yi Yi only carefully hid the fact that she bullied Jiang Chen"s mother and talked down to his father.

Also, she dare not be vocal of her a.s.sumption. That she might have been reborn rather than transmigrated. And if she was, then it would be the most idiotic reincarnation. Ever. 

It would mean she jumped over to her past-past self that the future she knows was hundred years over. What about the golden finger of knowing the future and changing it, ah?!

Reincarnation would make Jiang Yu her Ex as well. Heck no.

Isn"t reincarnation a genre for second chances? What"s she going to fix? Her boss? How scary of a regret is it that reincarnation crossed past lives?!

Wei Yi Yi dare acknowledge Wei Lian but dare not acknowdlege this notion. She cannot help expeculating only because two people here resemble people close to her.

If the other three are here as well...  

Anyway, it was a scary rediscovery of herself.

"The outside has a lot of unique things," Jiang Chen expressed, carrying the rabbit his father gave to him. 

This rabbit was supposed to be skinned along with the others but Wei Yi Yi shouted "animal rights!" and now they have a horde of rabbits outside.

Wei Yi Yi turned her attention back. At this point, she was treating reality as a window tab she checks from time to time. "Every place has their own unique things. Even the palace."

"Is the scenery at Thousand Miles Mountain more beautiful than the rooftop?"

"En." Anything outside your range is always more beautiful.

Jiang Chen mumbled to himself, "When I grow up, I"ll take auntie out of the palace."

"No thanks."

Transportation sucks, alright! Have some mercy for my old working bone.

"Eh?"