"I couldn"t do that, sir," replied the girl, "it would be treacherous; and sooner than do so, I"d just as soon he would kill me at wanst--still I would do a great deal to save Mr. Woodward. But will Mr. Woodward marry me, sir? because he said he would--in the coorse of some time."
"And if he said so don"t be uneasy; he is a gentleman, and a gentleman, you know, always keeps his word. Don"t be alarmed, my pretty girl--your lover will provide for you."
"Am I to pay you anything, sir?" she asked, rising.
"No, my dear, I will take no money from you; but if you wish to save Mr. Woodward from danger, you will enable the soldiers to, arrest Shawn-na-Middogue. Even you, yourself, are not safe so long as he is at large."
She then took her leave in silence.
It is not to be supposed that among the crowd that was a.s.sembled around the inn door there were not a number of waggish characters, who felt strongly inclined to have, if possible, a hearty laugh at the great conjurer. No matter what state of society may exist, or what state of feeling may prevail, there will always be found a cla.s.s of persons who are exceptions to the general rule. Whilst the people were chatting in wonder and admiration, not without awe and fear, concerning the extraordinary knowledge and power of the conjurer, a character peculiar to all times and all ages made his appearance, and soon joined them.
This was one of those circulating, unsettled vagabonds, whom, like sc.u.m, society, whether agitated or not, is always sure to throw on the surface. The comical miscreant no sooner made his appearance than, like Liston, when coming on the stage, he was greeted with a general roar of laughter.
"So," said he, "you have a conjurer above. But wait a while; by the powdhers o" delf Rantin" Rody"s the boy will try his mettle. If he can look farther than his nose, I"m the lad will find it out. If he doesn"t say I"ll be hanged, he knows nothing about his business. I have myself half-a-dozen hangmen engaged to let me down aisy; it"s a death I"ve a great fancy for, and, plaise G.o.d, I"m workin" honestly to desarve it.
Which of you has a cow to steal? for, by the sweets o" rosin, I"m low in cash, and want a thrifle to support nather; for nather, my boys, must be supported, and it was never my intintion to die for want o" my vittles; aitin" and drinkin" is not very pleasant to most people, I know, but I was born wid a fancy for both."
"Rantin" Rody, in airnest, will you go up and have your fortune tould?"
"But wait," he proceeded; "wait, I say,--wait,--I have it." And as he said so he went at the top of his speed down the street, and disappeared in Sol Donnel"s cabin.
"By this and by that," said one of them, "Rtn"tin" Rody will take s.p.u.n.k out of him, if it"s in him."
"I think he had better have notin" to do wid him," said an old woman, "for fraid he"d rise the devil--Lord guard us! Sure it"s the same man that was in this very town the night he was _riz_ before, and that the bonfire for Suil Balor (the eye of Balor, or the Evil Eye) Woodward was drowned by a shower of blood. Troth I wouldn"t be in the same Woodward"s coat for the wealth o" the world. As for Rantin" Rody, let him take care of himself. It"s never safe to sport wid edged tools, and he"ll be apt to find it so, if he attempts to put his tricks upon the conjurer."
In the meantime, while that gentleman was seated above stairs, a female, tall, slim, and considerably advanced in years, entered the room and took her seat. Her face was thin, and red in complexion, especially about the point of a rather long nose, where the color appeared to be considerably deeper in hue.
"Sir," said she, in a sharp tone of voice, "I"m told you can tell fortunes."
"Certainly, madam," he replied, you have been correctly informed."
"You won"t be offended, then, if I wish to ask you a question or two.
It"s not about myself, but a sister of mine, who is--ahem--what the censorious world is pleased to call an old maid."
"Why did your sister not come herself?" he asked; "I cannot predict anything unless the individual is before me; I must have him or her, as the case may be, under my eye."
"Bless me, sir! I didn"t know that; but as I am now here--could you tell me anything about myself?"
"I could tell you many things," replied the conjurer, who read old maid in every line of her face--"many things not very pleasant for you to reflect upon."
"O, but I don"t wish to hear anything unpleasant," said she; "tell me something that"s agreeable."
"In the first place, I cannot do so," he replied; "I must be guided by truth. You have, for instance, been guilty of great cruelty; and although you are but a young woman, in the very bloom of life--"
Here the lady bowed to him, and simpered--her thin, red nose twisted into a gracious curl, as thanking him for his politeness.
"In the very prime of life, madam--yet you have much to be accountable for, in consequence of your very heartless cruelty to the male s.e.x--you see, madam, and you feel too, that I speak truth."
The lady put the spectre of an old fan up to her withered visage, and pretended to enact a blush of admission.
"Well, sir," she replied, "I--I--I cannot say but that--indeed I have been charged with--not that it--cruelty--I mean--was ever in my heart; but you must admit, sir, that--that--in fact--where too many press, upon a person, it is the more difficult choose."
"Unquestionably; but you should have, made a judicious selection--and that was because you were in no hurry--and indeed you need not be; you have plenty of time before you. Still, there is much blame attached to you--you have defrauded society of its rights. Why, now, you might have been the proud mother of a son or daughter at least five years old by this time, if it had not been for your own obduracy--excuse me."
Up went the skeleton fan again with a wonderfully modest if not an offended simper at the notion of such an insinuation; but, said she in her heart, this is the most gentlemanly conjurer that ever told a fortune; quite a delightful old gentleman; he is really charming; I wish I had met him twenty years ago."
"Well, sir," she replied, "I see there is no use in denying--especially to you, who seem to know everything--the truth of the facts you have stated. There was one gentleman in particular whom I rejected--that is, conditionally--rather harshly; and do you know, he took the scarlet-fever soon afterwards and died of a broken-heart."
"Go on, madam," said he; "make a clean breast of it--so shall you enable me to compare the future with the past, and state your coming fortunes more distinctly."
"Another gentleman, sir--a country squire--owes, I fear, his death to my severity; he was a hard drinker, but I gave him a month to reform--which sentence he took so much to heart that he broke his neck in a fox-chase from mere despair. A third individual--a very handsome young man--of whom I must confess I was a little jealous about his flirting with another young lady--felt such remorse that he absolutely ran away with and married her. I know, of course, I am accountable for all these calamities; but it cannot be helped now--my conscience must bear it."
"You should not look back upon these things with too much remorse,"
replied the conjurer; "forget them--bear a more relenting heart; make some man happy, and marry. Have you no person at present in your eye with whom you could share your charms and your fortune?"
"O, sir, you are complimentary."
"Not at all, madam; speak to me candidly, as you perceive I do to you."
"Well, then," she replied, "there is a young gentleman with whom I should wish to enter into a--a domestic--that is--a matrimonial connection."
"Pray what age is he?"
"Indeed, he is but young, scarce nineteen; but then he is very wild, and I--I--have--indeed I am of too kind a heart, sir. I have supplied his extravagance--for so I must call it--poor boy--but cannot exactly get him to accept a legitimate right over me--I fear he is attached elsewhere--but you know he is young, sir, and. not come to his ripe judgment yet. I read your handbill, sir; and if you could furnish me with a--something--ahem--that might enable me to gain, or rather to restore his affections--for I think he was fond of me some few months ago--I would not grudge whatever the payment might be."
"You mean a philter?"
"I believe that is what it is called, sir."
"Well, madam, you shall be supplied with a philter that never fails, on the payment ol twenty-one shillings. This, philter, madam, will not only make him fond of you before marriage, but will secure his affections during life, increasing them day by day, so that every month of your lives will be a delicious honeymoon. There is another bottle at the same price; it may not, indeed, be necessary for you, but I can a.s.sure you that it has made many families happy where there had been previously but little prospect of happiness; the price is the same--twenty-one shillings."
Up went the spectral fan again, and out came the forty-two shillings, and, with a formal courtesy, the venerable old maid walked away with the two bottles of aqua pura in her pocket.
Now came the test for the conjurer"s knowledge--the sharp and unexpected trial of his skill and sagacity. After the old maid had taken her leave, possessed of the two bottles, a middle-aged, large-sized woman walked in, and, after making a low courtesy, sat down as she had been desired.
The conjurer glanced keenly at her, and something like a smile might be seen to settle upon his features; it was so slight, however, that the good woman did not notice it.
"Pray, what"s the object of your visit to me, may I ask?"
"My husband, sir--he runn"d away from me, sure."
"Small blame to him," replied the conjurer. "If I had such a wife I would not remain a single hour in her company."
"And is that the tratement you give a heart-broken and desarted crature like me?"
"Come, what made him run away from you?"
"In regard, sir, of a dislike he took to me."
"That was a proof that the man had some taste."
"Ay, but why hadn"t he that taste afore he married me?"