"And yet you were right. It seems to me that you are always right, Chris."
"No--not always; but more often than you are, perhaps," replied Christopher, in rather a husky voice, but with a very kindly smile. "I am older, you see, for one thing; and I have had a harder time of it for another, and some of the idealism has been knocked out of me."
"But the nice thing about you is that though you always know when I am wrong or foolish, you never seem to despise me for it."
Despise her? Christopher laughed at the word; and yet women were supposed to have such keen perceptions.
"I don"t care whether you are wise or foolish," he said, "as long as you are you. That is all that matters to me."
"And you really think I am nice?"
"I don"t see how you could well be nicer."
"Oh! you don"t know what I could do if I tried. You underrate my powers; you always did. But you are a very restful person, Chris; when my mind gets tired with worrying over things and trying to understand them, I find it a perfect holiday to talk to you. You seem to take things as they are."
"Well, I have to, you see; and what must be must."
"Simple natures like yours are very soothing to complex natures like mine. When I"ve lived my life and worn myself out with trying to get the utmost I can out of everything, I shall spend the first three thousand years of eternity sitting quite still upon a fixed star without speaking, with my legs dangling into s.p.a.ce, and looking at you. It will be such a nice rest, before beginning life over again."
"Say two thousand years; you"d never be able to sit still without speaking for more than two thousand years at the outside. By that time you"d have pulled yourself together, and be wanting to set about teaching the angels a thing or two. I know your ways."
"I should enjoy that," laughed Elisabeth.
"So would the angels, if they were anything like me."
Elisabeth laughed again, and looked through the trees to the fields beyond. Friends were much more comfortable than lovers, she said to herself; Alan in his palmiest days had never been half so soothing to her as Christopher was now. She wondered why poets and people of that kind made so much of love and so little of friendship, since the latter was obviously the more lasting and satisfactory of the two. Somehow the mere presence of Christopher had quite cured the sore feeling that Alan and Felicia had left behind them when they started for their walk without even asking her to go with them; and she was once more sure of the fact that she was necessary to somebody--a certainty without which Elisabeth could not live. So her imagination took heart of grace again, and began drawing plans for extensive castles in Spain, and arranging social campaigns wherein she herself should be crowned with triumph. She decided that half the delight of winning life"s prizes and meeting its fairy princes would be the telling Christopher all about them afterward; for her belief in his exhaustless sympathy was boundless.
"A penny for your thoughts," he said, after she had been silent for some moments.
"I was looking at Mrs. Bateson feeding her fowls," said Elisabeth evasively; "and, I say, have you ever noticed that hens are just like tea-pots, and c.o.c.ks like coffee-pots? Look at them now! It seems as if an army of breakfast services had suddenly come to life _a la_ Galatea, and were pouring libations at Mrs. Bateson"s feet."
"It does look rather like that, I admit. But here are Miss Herbert and Tremaine returning from their walk; let"s go and meet them."
And Elisabeth went to meet the lovers with no longer any little cobwebs of jealousy hiding in the dark corners of her heart, Christopher"s hand having swept them all away; he had a wonderful power of exterminating the little foxes which would otherwise have spoiled Elisabeth"s vines; and again she said to herself how much better a thing was friendship than love, since Alan had always expected her to be interested in his concerns, while Christopher, on the contrary, was always interested in hers.
It was not long after this that Elisabeth was told by Felicia of the latter"s engagement to Alan Tremaine; and Elisabeth was amazed at the rapidity with which Felicia had a.s.similated her lover"s views on all subjects. Elisabeth had expected that her friend would finally sacrifice her opinions on the altar of her feelings; she was already old enough to be prepared for that; but she had antic.i.p.ated a fierce warfare in the soul of Felicia between the directly opposing principles of this young lady"s mother and lover. To Elisabeth"s surprise, this civil war never took place. Felicia accepted Alan"s doubts as unquestioningly as she had formerly accepted Mrs. Herbert"s beliefs; and as she loved the former more devotedly than she had ever loved the latter, she was more devout and fervid in her agnosticism than she had ever been in her faith. She had believed, because her mother ordered her to believe; she doubted, because Alan desired her to doubt; her belief and unbelief being equally the outcome of her affections rather than of her convictions.
Mrs. Herbert likewise looked leniently upon Alan"s want of orthodoxy, and at this Elisabeth was not surprised. Possibly there are not many of us who do not--in the private and confidential depths of our evil hearts--regard earth in the hand as worth more than heaven in the bush, so to speak; at any rate, Felicia"s mother was not one of the bright exceptions; and--from a purely commercial point of view--a saving faith does not go so far as a spending income, and it is no use pretending that it does. So Mrs. Herbert smiled upon her daughter"s engagement; but compromised with that accommodating conscience of hers by always speaking of her prospective son-in-law as "poor Alan," just as if she really believed, as she professed she did, that the death of the body and the death of the soul are conditions equally to be deplored.
"You see, my dear," she said to Elisabeth, who came to stay at Wood Glen for Felicia"s marriage, which took place in the early summer, "it is such a comfort to Mr. Herbert and myself to know that our dear child is so comfortably provided for. And then--although I can not altogether countenance his opinions--poor Alan has such a good heart."
Elisabeth, remembering that she had once been fascinated by the master of the Moat House, was merciful. "He is an extremely interesting man to talk to," she said; "he has thought out so many things."
"He has, my love. And if we are tempted to rebuke him too severely for his non-acceptance of revealed truth, we must remember that he was deprived comparatively early in life of both his parents, and so ought rather to be pitied than blamed," agreed Mrs. Herbert, who would cheerfully have poured out all the vials of the Book of Revelation upon any impecunious doubter who had dared to add the mortal sin of poverty to the venial one of unbelief.
"And he is really very philanthropic," Elisabeth continued; "he has done no end of things for the work-people at the Osierfield. It is a pity that his faith is second-rate, considering that his works are first-cla.s.s."
"Ah! my dear, we must judge not, lest in turn we too should be judged.
Who are we, that we should say who is or who is not of the elect? It is often those who seem to be the farthest from the kingdom that are in truth the nearest to it." Mrs. Herbert had dismissed a kitchen-maid, only the week before, for declining to attend her Bible-cla.s.s, and walking out with a young man instead.
"Still, I am sorry that Alan has all those queer views," Elisabeth persisted; "he really would be a splendid sort of person if he were only a Christian; and it seems such a pity that--with all his learning--he hasn"t learned the one thing that really matters."
"My love, I am ashamed to find you so censorious; it is a sad fault, especially in the young. I would advise you to turn to the thirteenth of First Corinthians, and see for yourself how excellent a gift is charity--the greatest of all, according to our dear Saint Paul."
Elisabeth sighed. She had long ago become acquainted with Mrs. Herbert"s custom of keeping religion as a thing apart, and of treating it from an "in-another-department-if-you-please" point of view; and she felt that Tremaine"s open agnosticism was almost better--and certainly more sincere--than this.
But Mrs. Herbert was utterly unconscious of any secret fault on her own part, and continued to purr contentedly to herself. "Felicia, dear child! will certainly take an excellent position. She will be in county society, the very thing which I have always desired for her; and she will enter it, not on sufferance, but as one of themselves. I can not tell you what a pleasure it is to Mr. Herbert and myself to think of our beloved daughter as a regular county lady; it quite makes up for all the little self-denials that we suffered in order to give her a good education and to render her fit to take her place in society. I shouldn"t be surprised if she were even presented at Court." And the mother"s cup of happiness ran over at the mere thought of such honour and glory.
Felicia, too, was radiantly happy. In the first place, she was very much in love; in the second, her world was praising her for doing well to herself. "I can not think how a clever man like Alan ever fell in love with such a stupid creature as me," she said to Elisabeth, not long before the wedding.
"Can"t you? Well, I can. I don"t wonder at any man"s falling in love with you, darling, you are so dear and pretty and altogether adorable."
"But then Alan is so different from other men."
Elisabeth was too well-mannered to smile at this; but she made a note of it to report to Christopher afterward. She knew that he would understand how funny it was.
"I am simply amazed at my own happiness," Felicia continued; "and I am so dreadfully afraid that he will be disappointed in me when he gets to know me better, and will find out that I am not half good enough for him--which I am not."
"What nonsense! Why, there isn"t a man living that would really be good enough for you, Felicia."
"Elisabeth! When I hear Alan talking, I wonder how he can put up with silly little me at all. You see, I never was clever--not even as clever as you are; and you, of course, aren"t a millionth part as clever as Alan. And then he has such grand thoughts, too; he is always wanting to help other people, and to make them happier. I feel that as long as I live I never can be half grateful enough to him for the honour he has done me in wanting me for his wife."
Elisabeth shrugged her shoulders; the honours that have been within our reach are never quite so wonderful as those that have not.
So Alan and Felicia were married with much rejoicing and ringing of bells; and Elisabeth found it very pleasant to have her old schoolfellow settled at the Moat House. In fact so thoroughly did she throw herself into the interests of Felicia"s new home, that she ceased to feel her need of Christopher, and consequently neglected him somewhat. It was only when others failed her that he was at a premium; when she found she could do without him, she did. As for him, he loyally refrained from blaming Elisabeth, even in his heart, and cursed Fate instead; which really was unfair of him, considering that in this matter Elisabeth, and not Fate, was entirely to blame. But Christopher was always ready to find excuses for Elisabeth, whatever she might do; and this, it must be confessed, required no mean order of ingenuity just then. Elisabeth was as yet young enough to think lightly of the gifts that were bestowed upon her freely and with no trouble on her part, such as bread and air and sunshine and the like; it was reserved for her to learn later that the things one takes for granted are the best thing life has to offer.
It must also be remembered, for her justification, that Christopher had never told her that he loved her "more than reason"; and it is difficult for women to believe that any man loves them until he has told them so, just as it is difficult for them to believe that a train is going direct to the place appointed to it in Bradshaw, until they have been verbally a.s.sured upon the point by two guards, six porters, and a newspaper boy.
Nevertheless, Elisabeth"s ignorance--though perhaps excusable, considering her s.e.x--was anything but bliss to poor Christopher, and her good-natured carelessness hurt him none the less for her not knowing that it hurt him.
When Felicia had been married about three months her mother came to stay with her at the Moat House; and Elisabeth smiled to herself--and to Christopher--as she pictured the worthy woman"s delight in her daughter"s new surroundings.
"She"ll extol all Felicia"s belongings as exhaustively as if she were the Benedicite," Elisabeth said, "and she"ll enumerate them as carefully as if she were sending them to the wash. You"ll find there won"t be a single one omitted--not even the second footman or the soft-water cistern. Mrs. Herbert is one who battens on details, and she never spares her hearers a single item."
"It is distinctly naughty of you," Christopher replied, with the smile that was always ready for Elisabeth"s feeblest sallies, "to draw the good soul out for the express purpose of laughing at her. I am ashamed of you, Miss Farringdon."
"Draw her out, my dear boy! You don"t know what you are talking about.
The most elementary knowledge of Mrs. Herbert would teach you that she requires nothing in the shape of drawing out. You have but to mention the word "dinner," and the secret sins of her cook are retailed to you in chronological order; you have but to whisper the word "clothes," and the iniquities of her dressmaker"s bill are laid bare before your eyes.
Should the conversation glance upon Mr. Herbert, his complete biography becomes your own possession; and should the pa.s.sing thought of childhood appear above her mental horizon, she tells you all about her own children as graphically as if she were editing a new edition of The Pillars of the House. And yet you talk of drawing her out! I am afraid you have no perceptions, Christopher."
"Possibly not; everybody doesn"t have perceptions. I am frequently struck with clever people"s lack of them."
"Well, I"m off," replied Elisabeth, whipping up her pony, "to hear Mrs.
Herbert"s outpourings on Felicia"s happiness; when I come back I expect I shall be able to write another poem on "How does the water come down at Lodore"--with a difference."
And Christopher--who had met her in the High Street--smiled after the retreating figure in sheer delight at her. How fresh and bright and spontaneous she was, he thought, and how charmingly ignorant of the things which she prided herself upon understanding so profoundly! He laughed aloud as he recalled how very wise Elisabeth considered herself.
And then he wondered if life would teach her to be less sure of her own buoyant strength, and less certain of her ultimate success in everything she undertook; and, if it did, he felt that he should have an ugly account to settle with life. He was willing for Fate to knock him about as much and as hardly as she pleased, provided she would let Elisabeth alone, and allow the girl to go on believing in herself and enjoying herself as she was so abundantly capable of doing. By this time Christopher was enough of a philosopher to think that it did not really matter much in the long run whether he were happy or unhappy; but he was not yet able to regard the thought of Elisabeth"s unhappiness as anything but a catastrophe of the most insupportable magnitude; which showed that he had not yet sufficient philosophy to go round.
When Elisabeth arrived at the Moat House she found Mrs. Herbert alone, Felicia having gone out driving with her husband; and, to Elisabeth"s surprise, there was no sign of the jubilation which she had antic.i.p.ated.
On the contrary, Mrs. Herbert was subdued and tired-looking.