"Then what will happen at the mills?"
"Oh, some one else will be found--the new ideas are stirring everywhere.
And if you"ll only come back here, and help my successor----"
"Do you think they are likely to choose any one else with your ideas?"
she interposed with unexpected acuteness; and after a short silence he answered: "Not immediately, perhaps; but in time--in time there will be improvements."
"As if the poor people could wait! Oh, it"s cruel, cruel of you to go!"
Her voice broke in a throb of entreaty that went to his inmost fibres.
"You don"t understand. It"s impossible in the present state of things that I should do any good by staying."
"Then you refuse? Even if I were to insist on their asking you to stay, you would still refuse?" she persisted.
"Yes--I should still refuse."
She made no answer, but moved a few steps nearer to the edge of the wood. The meadow was just below them now, and the sleigh in plain sight on the height beyond. Their steps made no sound on the sodden drifts underfoot, and in the silence he thought he heard a catch in her breathing. It was enough to make the br.i.m.m.i.n.g moment overflow. He stood still before her and bent his head to hers.
"Bessy!" he said, with sudden vehemence.
She did not speak or move, but in the quickened state of his perceptions he became aware that she was silently weeping. The gathering darkness under the trees enveloped them. It absorbed her outline into the shadowy background of the wood, from which her face emerged in a faint spot of pallor; and the same obscurity seemed to envelop his faculties, merging the hard facts of life in a blur of feeling in which the distinctest impression was the sweet sense of her tears.
"Bessy!" he exclaimed again; and as he drew a step nearer he felt her yield to him, and bury her sobs against his arm.
BOOK II
IX
"BUT, Justine----"
Mrs. Harry Dressel, seated in the June freshness of her Oak Street drawing-room, and harmonizing by her high lights and hard edges with the white-and-gold angularities of the best furniture, cast a rebuking eye on her friend Miss Brent, who stood arranging in a gla.s.s bowl the handful of roses she had just brought in from the garden.
Mrs. Dressel"s intonation made it clear that the entrance of Miss Brent had been the signal for renewing an argument which the latter had perhaps left the room to escape.
"When you were here three years ago, Justine, I could understand your not wanting to go out, because you were in mourning for your mother--and besides, you"d volunteered for that bad surgical case in the Hope Hospital. But now that you"ve come back for a rest and a change I can"t imagine why you persist in shutting yourself up--unless, of course," she concluded, in a higher key of reproach, "it"s because you think so little of Hanaford society----"
Justine Brent, putting the last rose in place, turned from her task with a protesting gesture.
"My dear Effie, who am I to think little of any society, when I belong to none?" She pa.s.sed a last light touch over the flowers, and crossing the room, brushed her friend"s hand with the same caressing gesture.
Mrs. Dressel met it with an unrelenting turn of her plump shoulder, murmuring: "Oh, if you take _that_ tone!" And on Miss Brent"s gaily rejoining: "Isn"t it better than to have other people take it for me?"
she replied, with an air of affront that expressed itself in a ruffling of her whole pretty person: "If you"ll excuse my saying so, Justine, the fact that you are staying with _me_ would be enough to make you welcome anywhere in Hanaford!"
"I"m sure of it, dear; so sure that my horrid pride rather resents being floated in on the high tide of such overwhelming credentials."
Mrs. Dressel glanced up doubtfully at the dark face laughing down on her. Though she was president of the Maplewood Avenue Book-club, and habitually figured in the society column of the "Banner" as one of the intellectual leaders of Hanaford, there were moments when her self-confidence trembled before Justine"s light sallies. It was absurd, of course, given the relative situations of the two; and Mrs. Dressel, behind her friend"s back, was quickly rea.s.sured by the thought that Justine was only a hospital nurse, who had to work for her living, and had really never "been anywhere"; but when Miss Brent"s verbal arrows were flying, it seemed somehow of more immediate consequence that she was fairly well-connected, and lived in New York. No one placed a higher value on the abstract qualities of wit and irony than Mrs. Dressel; the difficulty was that she never quite knew when Justine"s retorts were loaded, or when her own susceptibilities were the target aimed at; and between her desire to appear to take the joke, and the fear of being ridiculed without knowing it, her pretty face often presented an interesting study in perplexity. As usual, she now took refuge in bringing the talk back to a personal issue.
"I can"t imagine," she said, "why you won"t go to the Gaines"s garden-party. It"s always the most brilliant affair of the season; and this year, with the John Amhersts here, and all their party--that fascinating Mrs. Eustace Ansell, and Mrs. Amherst"s father, old Mr.
Langhope, who is quite as quick and clever as _you_ are--you certainly can"t accuse us of being dull and provincial!"
Miss Brent smiled. "As far as I can remember, Effie, it is always you who accuse others of bringing that charge against Hanaford. For my part, I know too little of it to have formed any opinion; but whatever it may have to offer me, I am painfully conscious of having, at present, nothing but your kind commendation to give in return."
Mrs. Dressel rose impatiently. "How absurdly you talk! You"re a little thinner than usual, and I don"t like those dark lines under your eyes; but Westy Gaines told me yesterday that he thought you handsomer than ever, and that it was intensely becoming to some women to look over-tired."
"It"s lucky I"m one of that kind," Miss Brent rejoined, between a sigh and a laugh, "and there"s every promise of my getting handsomer every day if somebody doesn"t soon arrest the geometrical progression of my good looks by giving me the chance to take a year"s rest!"
As she spoke, she stretched her arms above her head, with a gesture revealing the suppleness of her slim young frame, but also its tenuity of structure--the frailness of throat and shoulders, and the play of bones in the delicate neck. Justine Brent had one of those imponderable bodies that seem a mere pinch of matter shot through with light and colour. Though she did not flush easily, auroral lights ran under her clear skin, were lost in the shadows of her hair, and broke again in her eyes; and her voice seemed to shoot light too, as though her smile flashed back from her words as they fell--all her features being so fluid and changeful that the one solid thing about her was the ma.s.sing of dense black hair which clasped her face like the n.o.ble metal of some antique bust.
Mrs. Dressel"s face softened at the note of weariness in the girl"s voice. "Are you very tired, dear?" she asked drawing her down to a seat on the sofa.
"Yes, and no--not so much bodily, perhaps, as in spirit." Justine Brent drew her brows together, and stared moodily at the thin brown hands interwoven between Mrs. Dressel"s plump fingers. Seated thus, with hollowed shoulders and brooding head, she might have figured a young sibyl bowed above some mystery of fate; but the next moment her face, inclining toward her friend"s, cast off its shadows and resumed the look of a plaintive child.
"The worst of it is that I don"t look forward with any interest to taking up the old drudgery again. Of course that loss of interest may be merely physical--I should call it so in a nervous patient, no doubt. But in myself it seems different--it seems to go to the roots of the world.
You know it was always the imaginative side of my work that helped me over the ugly details--the pity and beauty that disinfected the physical horror; but now that feeling is lost, and only the mortal disgust remains. Oh, Effie, I don"t want to be a ministering angel any more--I want to be uncertain, coy and hard to please. I want something dazzling and unaccountable to happen to me--something new and unlived and indescribable!"
She s.n.a.t.c.hed herself with a laugh from the bewildered Effie, and flinging up her arms again, spun on a light heel across the polished floor.
"Well, then," murmured Mrs. Dressel with gentle obstinacy, "I can"t see why in the world you won"t go to the Gaines"s garden-party!" And caught in the whirlwind of her friend"s incomprehensible mirth, she still persisted, as she ducked her blonde head to it: "If you"ll only let me lend you my dress with the Irish lace, you"ll look smarter than anybody there...."
Before her toilet mirror, an hour later, Justine Brent seemed in a way to fulfill Mrs. Dressel"s prediction. So mirror-like herself, she could no more help reflecting the happy effect of a bow or a feather than the subtler influence of word and look; and her face and figure were so new to the advantages of dress that, at four-and-twenty, she still produced the effect of a young girl in her first "good" frock. In Mrs. Dressel"s festal raiment, which her dark tints subdued to a quiet elegance, she was like the golden core of a pale rose illuminating and scenting its petals.
Three years of solitary life, following on a youth of confidential intimacy with the mother she had lost, had produced in her the quaint habit of half-loud soliloquy. "Fine feathers, Justine!" she laughed back at her laughing image. "You look like a phoenix risen from your ashes.
But slip back into your own plumage, and you"ll be no more than a little brown bird without a song!"
The luxurious suggestions of her dress, and the way her warm youth became it, drew her back to memories of a childhood nestled in beauty and gentle ways, before her handsome prodigal father had died, and her mother"s face had grown pinched in the long struggle with poverty. But those memories were after all less dear to Justine than the grey years following, when, growing up, she had helped to clear a s.p.a.ce in the wilderness for their tiny hearth-fire, when her own efforts had fed the flame and roofed it in from the weather. A great heat, kindled at that hearth, had burned in her veins, making her devour her work, lighting and warming the long cold days, and reddening the horizon through dark pa.s.sages of revolt and failure; and she felt all the more deeply the chill of reaction that set in with her mother"s death.
She thought she had chosen her work as a nurse in a spirit of high disinterestedness; but in the first hours of her bereavement it seemed as though only the personal aim had sustained her. For a while, after this, her sick people became to her mere bundles of disintegrating matter, and she shrank from physical pain with a distaste the deeper because, mechanically, she could not help working on to relieve it.
Gradually her sound nature pa.s.sed out of this morbid phase, and she took up her task with deeper pity if less exalted ardour; glad to do her part in the vast impersonal labour of easing the world"s misery, but longing with all the warm instincts of youth for a special load to lift, a single hand to clasp.
Ah, it was cruel to be alive, to be young, to bubble with springs of mirth and tenderness and folly, and to live in perpetual contact with decay and pain--to look persistently into the grey face of death without having lifted even a corner of life"s veil! Now and then, when she felt her youth flame through the sheath of dullness which was gradually enclosing it, she rebelled at the conditions that tied a spirit like hers to its monotonous task, while others, without a quiver of wings on their dull shoulders, or a note of music in their hearts, had the whole wide world to range through, and saw in it no more than a frightful emptiness to be shut out with tight walls of habit....
A tap on the door announced Mrs. Dressel, garbed for conquest, and bestowing on her brilliant person the last anxious touches of the artist reluctant to part from a masterpiece.
"My dear, how well you look! I _knew_ that dress would be becoming!" she exclaimed, generously transferring her self-approval to Justine; and adding, as the latter moved toward her: "I wish Westy Gaines could see you now!"
"Well, he will presently," Miss Brent rejoined, ignoring the slight stress on the name.