It was a particularly hot day in the third week of their voyage, and Nico had been walking along the deck, trying to shut his ears to the sound of feminine laughter. It was driving him insane and the Lord only knew what it was doing to the rest of the crew. Low-pitched and musical, it ate away at his senses, teasing him mercilessly. What was entertaining her so? He wondered how Midori could find such happiness in the company of Harding and the cabin boy, not to mention the surgeon.
No reason why she can"t be as happy spending time with me, d.a.m.n it.
His decision made, he walked in the direction of the merriment. As he came nearer, the clacking noise of a pair of dice being thrown against a wooden surface mingled with Midori"s laughter and he peered into the small corridor outside her cabin. He wasn"t pleased by what he saw, as he didn"t encourage gambling among his crew, but it was the perfect opportunity to try and rattle her composure a little.
She was kneeling on the floor, wearing another plain kimono, this time in a dark shade of russet. Her legs were tucked demurely underneath her. Next to her, Harding and Jochem were seated cross-legged, so close they almost touched her.
"What"s going on here?" Nico demanded, trying his best to sound stern.
Three surprised faces looked up at him as one, and the laughter stopped abruptly.
"Harding and Jochem are teaching me backgammon," Midori replied calmly. "We"re playing for money." She indicated a small pile of silver coins heaped next to her on the floor.
"I can see that." Nico frowned. "Should you be gambling away what I a.s.sume is your inheritance or dowry?" It occurred to him to wonder if she even had a dowry, and if so, where she kept it hidden. Not that it was any of his business, but he didn"t want his crew tempted by the lure of silver as well as her charms.
It was Midori"s turn to frown. "I"m only playing with a small amount."
"That"s what all gamblers say." Nico nodded as if she"d proved his point.
"She"s winnin" Captain," Harding added. "Has the devil"s own luck, she does."
"That"s neither here nor there. Lady Midori might be winning at the moment, but once the gambling fever sets in, she may not be so lucky."
"Gambling fever? What"s that? I"ve never heard of such an illness." Midori looked confused, her usual calm expression slipping a little for once.
Nico hid a smile. "It"s when a person becomes addicted to excessive gaming. They can"t help themselves and gamble until they have nothing left."
"I"m not such a lackwit!"
"Perhaps you don"t think so now," Nico countered.
"I know so," she said calmly. "Besides, there"s nothing else to do and it pa.s.ses the time. Mijnheer de Jong doesn"t need my help today and I can"t tidy my cabin and practise swordplay all day. Nor write poetry. Now please, if you don"t intend to join us, kindly let us continue with our game. I"m sure you are very busy." Midori turned back to the game and began to shake the dice inside her cupped hands, dismissing Nico as if he were of no importance. He"d seen the look in her eyes, though, and her cheeks were slightly flushed. She was definitely not indifferent to him at the moment. Excellent!
"I shall join you," he announced and sat down on the floor next to the others, folding his long legs with some difficulty. "I"ll show you what I mean and perhaps when you"re penniless you"ll understand. Start the game again, if you please."
Midori threw him a suspicious glance, as if she mistrusted his motives, but rearranged the pieces on the board nonetheless. "Very well."
"Jochem, you may begin."
"Y-yes, Captain." The cabin boy looked uncertain, but Nico gave him a rea.s.suring nod which put him at ease.
The weather had grown steadily warmer as they sailed south, and the perspiration poured off Harding"s bald head as the game went on. Nico could feel his own scalp p.r.i.c.kling in the heat, but Midori showed no signs of suffering likewise. From time to time she lifted a fan to cool herself, although she didn"t seem to need it very often. It was a beautiful object, richly decorated with coloured flowers on a gold and silver background, an exquisite thing which must have cost a small fortune.
"How do you do that, Mistress Midori?" Harding complained after a while, his face bright red and shiny by this time.
"Do what?"
"Stay so cool. Anyone"d think it was the middle of winter, lookin" at you."
Midori smiled. "I have been trained to cope with extremes in temperature. My body accepts them if my mind tells it to."
"Hmph." Poor Harding obviously couldn"t make his brain understand such reasoning and Midori pa.s.sed him the fan to relieve his suffering somewhat.
When he gave it back again after a while, Nico said, "May I borrow it too, please?" Midori nodded and handed it to him. He made sure his fingers brushed hers as he took it, and noticed her twitch a little. "Thank you." He looked into her eyes and saw hers widen in response. Good, she feels the connection between us, too. So underneath the calm facade, she"s just like any other woman.
But he knew he was in danger of being more affected by her proximity than she was by his and he started to regret joining the game. Not only was he uncomfortable in the enclosed corridor where the heat appeared much worse than on deck, but he was having trouble concentrating while sitting so close to Midori. He glanced at her and immediately wished he hadn"t. Her dark auburn hair had been pinned loosely on top of her head with what looked to Nico like a pair of eating sticks. Soft tendrils fell forward to caress her cheeks as she concentrated on the dice in her hands. Nico silently gritted his teeth.
No woman should be allowed to look that delectable. He wanted to carry her off to his cabin this instant and ...
He stifled a sigh. That wasn"t what he"d come down here for. A light flirtation, that"s all, he reminded himself. And he wanted to find out more about her her thoughts, her likes and dislikes, what made her happy or sad. I should just talk to her. But something held him back.
One thing he did find out, and quickly, was that she was an excellent backgammon player and Harding had been right she had the devil"s own luck. However hard he tried, he couldn"t make her lose and any lesson he had intended soon went out of the window.
"Have you played before?" he asked, knowing he sounded grumpy, but unable to do anything about it.
"Not this particular game, but we have other board games. I played sometimes with my ladies."
"Your servants?"
"Yes."
Nico shot her a glance. "You must miss them. Looking after yourself is surely difficult when you"re used to being waited on hand and foot?"
"Not at all. My mother taught me not to rely on others more than necessary and I"m perfectly capable of looking after myself. I was never waited on hand and foot, as you put it." She gave him an almost mocking bow. "But I thank you for your concern."
Nico marvelled again at how different she was from any other woman he"d ever met, so self-possessed, so utterly unruffled most of the time. He looked up to find her eyes sparkling at him, a smile lurking in their depths, dispelling his bad humour. Had she seen through his ruse? She probably has.
"Now, if you have finished teaching me a lesson, I find that I am growing hungry, so I think I"ll retire to my cabin. Thank you all for entertaining me." She stood up and bowed, then handed the money she had won to Harding and Jochem. "Here, you may as well take this back, then we can play again tomorrow. It"s only a game after all." She sent Nico a teasing look.
Touche, Nico thought and scrambled to his feet. He returned her bow with a more European version and couldn"t help but smile back at her. "Minx," he muttered.
"We"d best be gettin" our rations too, little one." Harding gathered up the game and pushed Jochem in the direction of the deck. "We"ll be back in a moment, mistress."
"Thank you." Midori stopped in her doorway and turned her gaze on Nico. "Would you perhaps care to have supper with me?"
Nico was torn. This was what he"d wanted, to spend time with her, but now he wasn"t sure. It wouldn"t be a good idea if he wanted to keep his sanity. In fact, it would probably be downright stupid. But what the h.e.l.l ... "Yes. Thank you," he said. "If you"re sure?"
"Of course. We can leave the door open and Harding will be back soon."
Nico hadn"t even been thinking about the impropriety of dining with her alone, but he realised now he should have been. He shook his head and followed her into the cabin.
d.a.m.n it all, I"m going soft in the head!
Chapter Eleven.
"So you believe in fate, do you?"
Captain Noordholt was sitting on Midori"s bunk, and looked to be enjoying his meal, although she"d had nothing to offer him except rice and char-grilled fish. She watched as he wielded his chopsticks like an expert, his long tanned fingers not awkward in the least. It pleased her that he"d bothered to learn when most of the other crew members used nothing but a spoon or their fingers.
"Of course. Don"t you?" Midori was surprised at his question.
"I"ve been taught to live according to G.o.d"s law and that He governs all things, but to my mind, we can each of us change our fate by working hard. I confess I"ve not seen much evidence that praying has helped me overmuch."
"Ah, yes, your G.o.d." Midori nodded slowly. She had wondered if he would try to convert her to his faith, as Ichiro had warned her the foreigners would surely do. Harding had told her the crew held morning and evening prayers every day and anyone found missing had to pay a fine. So far, that hadn"t included her, but she fully expected to be asked sooner or later.
"You weren"t taught about the Christian faith?" The captain regarded her from under swathes of golden hair which had fallen across his cheeks as he bent over the rice bowl.
"Yes, a little, but I chose to follow the j.a.panese way in such matters."
"I see." He seemed thoughtful, then added almost tentatively, "You do realise that might cause some problems with your English relatives?"
"Yes, I"ve thought of that and I decided the best thing would probably be to say nothing. I won"t interfere in their beliefs." The captain stopped eating and stared at her, then burst out laughing. It was a lovely sound, low and rumbling, which seemed to send pleasurable shockwaves right through her, but Midori frowned, unsure of its cause. "Did I say something wrong?"
She almost didn"t hear his reply because she was entranced by the sight of him smiling so broadly. His teeth were white and even, tiny crow"s feet crinkled the corners of his eyes and there were grooves either side of his mouth, but they only added character to his tanned face and she found them most attractive. The blue eyes sparkled with amus.e.m.e.nt. As for his short beard, it was more like very long stubble and Midori was torn between a longing to have him shave it off and running the tips of her fingers through it to see if it was soft or harsh to the touch.
"Not precisely, but I"m afraid it will be the other way round."
"What will?" His words brought her back to the discussion and she tried to focus on what he was saying rather than anything else.
"About religion. They will certainly try to interfere with yours." His smile was contagious, so she returned it. His eyes were still shining with suppressed merriment as he shook his head. "I"m sorry, I didn"t mean to offend you. Your way of looking at it was just a little unexpected."
"I thought England was a free country? I was told no one is burned at the stake there for their beliefs any longer. The good Queen Elizabeth put an end to such practices."
"Not entirely, from what I"ve heard, although she was certainly more lenient than the rulers before her. But even if people are not actually killed for their beliefs, it"s still an offence to be a heretic. And you can be punished severely in other ways, not to mention ostracised."
Midori sighed. "So in England it"s a crime not to be a Christian, whereas in my country they are persecuted. That makes very little sense."
"Indeed. If you want to avoid trouble, however, you"d do well to at least learn more about the Christian faith. You might have to pretend to adhere to it. Do you remember anything you were taught?"
"Some." Midori was reluctant to disclose just how inattentive she"d been. Although Hannah had never tried to force her daughter into listening, she"d done her best to explain about Christianity. But the stories she told Midori of Jesus and his disciples had seemed strange and unreal in the surroundings of Castle Shiroi and Midori had found it hard to relate to them.
Far easier to believe her father"s tales of spirits and deities in all the natural things around them, of benevolent kamis and ancestors watching over them. His teachings went hand-in-glove with the code of the samurai and made much more sense. With hindsight, Midori understood that her father had encouraged her not to listen to Hannah because he was afraid for her. Much as he loved Hannah, he"d never allowed any priests to visit the castle except in the utmost secrecy and Midori had unconsciously followed his wishes by having her mother buried according to j.a.panese custom and not as a Christian.
"But I don"t see what difference it makes to my relatives," Midori insisted. "As long as I behave well and perform any duties they require of me, surely that should be enough? I will accept the authority over me of whoever is head of the household."
"It may not be sufficient. In England, and indeed other parts of Europe, there are several kinds of Christianity. The people who champion each one are rather, shall we say, forceful in their views and tend to be intolerant of each other. Why, in Holland, there"s been a civil war going on for a long time, which is partly to do with differences in religion." He was looking serious now and Midori listened with a sinking heart as he continued. "Most of England"s population is Protestant and that probably includes your relatives. That means they"ll be anxious to ascertain you"re not a Papist; that is someone who belongs to the Catholic contingent. If they were to discover you"re not even a Papist, but worse, a heathen, they might be horrified." He shrugged. "You"ll just have to wait and see, though. I may be doing them an injustice."
"What"s a heathen?"
"A non-believer."
"But I do have beliefs."
He smiled again, distracting her from the seriousness of their discussion. "Yes, the wrong ones, in their eyes. I"m sorry, I realise this is difficult for you to comprehend."
"It"s definitely more complicated than I"d been led to believe. I wonder what else I was told that will turn out not to be true?" Midori felt let down, since she"d always taken her mother at her word. She saw now that perhaps Hannah had embellished the stories about her homeland slightly. Or maybe her memories of what it was really like had dimmed with time and to her, England had become a perfect place. "Captain Noordholt ..."
"Please call me Nico when there"s no one else about."
"Are you sure?" Midori had a vague feeling she shouldn"t, but she wasn"t sure why.
"Of course. As long as you remember to call me Captain when there are others present."
"Very well, Nico." She liked the sound of his name. With its short, sharp syllables it could have been j.a.panese and a sudden longing for her own homeland swept through her. She sighed, and as if he was attuned to her every mood, his expression immediately became one of concern.
"Is something wrong?"
"No, I was just thinking about my country and how everything was much simpler there."
"Don"t worry, I"ll help you to prepare yourself. Can you read?"
Midori nodded. "Both j.a.panese and English."
"Good. Then how about if you read parts of the Bible and I try to explain things to you more fully? There"s an English Bible in my cabin. It was Casper"s, I mean, Captain de Leuw"s; he liked to practise his English by reading it. I"ll lend it to you."
Midori looked into his indigo eyes and felt his strength flow into her. She relaxed. Of course she could do this, there was nothing wrong with her brain and she was quick to learn, always had been. Ichiro had told her she must try to adapt to foreign ways if she was to survive. Now Nico was telling her the same thing. She knew they were right.
"Thank you, I would like that. The sooner the better, don"t you think?" She smiled at him again and watched in amazement when his eyes darkened, as if with some deep emotion. All the noises of the ship faded into the background, making her feel they were in a magical coc.o.o.n where only the two of them existed. She sat immobile while his eyes devoured her and she couldn"t even blink. He held her prisoner with his gaze and although he never touched her, her skin tingled as though he was stroking it.
"Midori ..."
The sound of Harding"s voice and loud footsteps in the corridor outside Midori"s cabin broke the spell and Nico jumped to his feet in one lithe movement. His eyes held hers for a moment longer, then he bowed and moved towards the door.
"Thank you for the meal, it was excellent. I shall send Jochem to fetch the Bible now."
Midori was left standing in her cabin with an uneven pulse rate and feeling slightly giddy. Something had stirred inside her when Nico had looked into her eyes, something she had never felt before but knew for what it was desire. She tried to tell herself it was only because this was the first time an attractive man had actually paid her any attention. But somehow she knew that wasn"t the whole truth.
Nico was special and she was looking forward to becoming better acquainted with him.
Nico had marked the parts of the Bible he wanted Midori to read with sc.r.a.ps of torn-off paper, and he went back the next day to see how she was getting on. He ignored the little voice inside his head that whispered it was just a convenient excuse for him to spend time with her. And he was very aware how close he"d come to doing more than just looking at her the previous day, so it was madness to return again.
He went anyway.
Midori invited him in to sit on her bunk, carefully leaving the door open, he noticed, so they were both within view of Harding. The big man was sitting on the steps leading down to her cabin, whittling a piece of wood. She seated herself next to Nico, but with a respectable distance between them.
"I started immediately with the Gospel of St John as you suggested. Since I"m not used to reading in English, it took me a while to get going, but compared to j.a.panese kanji, it"s almost ludicrously simple, isn"t it? I"m not finding it difficult at all now. In fact, maybe I"ll read the entire book from cover to cover."
"Book?" he queried with a smile. "It"s not just any old book, this one is special so you shouldn"t refer to it like that. The Bible with a capital, reverential B."
"Really? If you say so."