CARVE. A decree absolute.
JANET. (Simply.) Is she what they call the ruling cla.s.ses?
LOOE. (Bows.) Lady Leonard and I have talked the matter over, and I pointed out to her that if this great genius was a member of the Church of England and if the sorrowing nation at large deems him worthy of the supreme honour of a national funeral, then by all means let him be buried in the Abbey. But if he was a Catholic, then I claim him for Westminster Cathedral, that magnificent fane which we have raised as a symbol of our renewed vitality. Now, was he a member of the Church of England?
CARVE. (Loudly.) Decidedly not.
LOOE. Good! Then I claim him. I detest casuistry and I claim him. I have only one other question. You knew him well--intimately--for many years.
On your conscience, Mr. Shawn, what interment in your opinion would he himself have preferred?
JANET. (After a pause.) It wouldn"t make much difference to him either way, would it?
CARVE. (With an outburst.) The whole thing is preposterous.
LOOE. (Ignoring the outburst.) My course seems quite clear. I shall advise Lady Leonard--
CARVE. Don"t you think you"re rather young to be in sole charge of this country?
LOOE. (Smoothly.) My dear sir, I am nothing but a humble priest who gives counsel when counsel is sought. And I may say that in this affair of the interment of our great national painter, there are other influences than mine. For instance, my sister, Honoria, who happens also to be president of the Ladies" Water Colour Society--(gesture of alarm from CARVE)--my sister has a great responsibility. She is the favourite niece of--(Whispers in CARVE"S ear.) Consequently--(Makes an impressive pause.)
HONORIA. You see my uncle is a bachelor and I keep house for him. Anselm used to live with us too, until he left the Church.
LOOE. Until I joined the Church, Honoria. Now Honoria wishes to be perfectly fair; she entirely realizes her responsibility; and that is why she has come with me to see you.
JANET. (Benignantly.) So that"s how these things are decided! I see I"d got quite a wrong notion of politics and so on.
HONORIA. Oh, Mr. Shawn-- } and } (Together.) JANET. My idea was-- }
JANET. I beg your pardon.
HONORIA. I beg yours.
JANET. Granted.
HONORIA. There"s one question I should so like to ask you, Mr. Shawn. In watercolours did Mr. Carve use Chinese white freely or did he stick to transparent colour, like the old English school? I wonder if you understand me?
CARVE. (Interested.) He used Chinese white like anything.
HONORIA. Oh! I"m so glad. You remember that charming water-colour of the Venetian gondolier in the Luxembourg. We had a great argument after we got home last Easter as to whether the oar was put in with Chinese white--or just "left out," you know!
CARVE. Chinese white, of course. My notion is that it doesn"t matter a fig how you get effects so long as you do get them.
HONORIA. And that was his notion too? (Telephone bell rings, JANET answers it.)
CARVE. His? Rather. You bet it was.
HONORIA. I"m so glad. I"m so glad. I knew I was right about Chinese white. Oh, Anselm, do let him be buried in the Abbey! Do let me suggest to uncle----
LOOE. My dear girl, ask your conscience. Enthusiasm for art I can comprehend; I can even sympathize with it. But if this grave national question is to be decided by considerations of Chinese white----
(CARVE turns to JANET as if for succour.)
JANET. (Calmly.) The doctor is just coming up.
CARVE. The doctor? What doctor?
JANET. A Dr. Horning. He says he"s Dr. Pascoe"s a.s.sistant and he attended Mr. Carve, and he wants to see you.
CARVE. But I don"t want to see him.
JANET. You"ll have to see a doctor.
CARVE. Why?
JANET. Because you"re ill. So you may just as well see this one as another. They"re all pretty much of a muchness.
(Enter PETER HORNING boisterously. A PAGE BOY opens the door but does not announce him.)
PETER. (Perceiving LOOE first.) Ah, Father! You here? How d"ye do?
What did you think of my special on last Sunday"s sermon? (Shakes hands with LOOE and bows to MISS LOOE as to an acquaintance.)
LOOE. Very good. Very good.
PETER. (Advancing to CARVE.) Mr. Shawn, I presume?
CARVE. (Glancing helplessly at JANET.) But this isn"t the doctor?
PETER. (Volubly.) Admitted! Admitted! I"m only his brother--a journalist. I"m on the Courier and the Mercury and several other Worgan papers. One of our chaps failed to get into this room this morning, so I came along to try what I could do. You see what I"ve done.
JANET. Well, I never came across such a set of people in my life.
PETER. (Aside to LOOE.) Is he in service here, or what?
LOOE. Mr. Shawn was Mr. Carve"s secretary and companion, not his valet.
PETER. (Puzzled, but accepting the situation.) Ah! So much the better.
Now, Mr. Shawn, can you tell me authoritatively whether shortly before his death Mr. Carve was engaged to be married under romantic circ.u.mstances to a lady of high rank?
HONORIA. Indeed!
CARVE. Who told you that?
PETER. Then he was!
CARVE. I"ve nothing to say.
PETER. You won"t tell me her name?
CARVE. I"ve nothing to say.