Looking down at the scene before me, I could easily see a few things that I did wrong in this whole situation; first and foremost was coming out of my house just to grab myself something from the corner store. What was truly amazing about the whole ordeal, as I floated down to maybe get a better look, is that the human body can truly hold quite a bit of blood. Always wanted to check on the legitimacy of those claims… at least it"s not out of my nose.Lying on the ground in front of me were two ex-human bodies; one having been mine while the other was used by an ex-girlfriend who had a few issues with the whole "ex" portion of that statement. I had broken up with the f.u.c.king lunatic after a particular scene where she decided that my niece was a distraction in our relationship and had a few words to say to my poor girl for it. One thing that I will always believe in is that my family comes first, c.u.n.ts like her come never. That was about four and a half months ago, so I was particularly surprised when she decided to corner me after I bought something good to drink and chips; to discuss our relationship.
What all that means really, is that she pulled out a 9mm handgun from behind her and decided to shoot me through the chest; piercing through my heart and pretty much killing me instantly. Thus my current predicament which I was able to watch the blood pool away from the hole in my chest. Oh, and the b.i.t.c.h decided to shoot herself in the head after laughing insanely and monologuing about how in the afterlife she and I will be together in the hands of the dark father. Seriously, did she think this was some form of video game or light novel where we"d meet in another life, fall in love, and be happy? If that was the case… I"d ask whomever was in charge to please not put me with her in that life.
As I was floating there thinking about all of this, it was then that my senses had begun to become dark from all around me; about f.u.c.king time I get to go into the next life. Wonder why they decided to allow me the privilege of seeing the ending to that lunatic, but since I am going to rest with my ancestors now, it shall be the furthest thing from my mind. I"d just like to get some sleep now, it"s been an odd and not so long life for me. Dying at twenty-nine might not be a record in any sense, it"s still not that much of a life yet still enough for some experiences. At least now it"s all over…
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At least that"s what I thought as I came to in an oddly… clean and neat office room. From the looks of it, it"s your standard waiting room area with those horrid "plush" faded red chairs that are horribly uncomfortable. Just with a quick once over I"d say there was about sixty chairs in the whole area; with around… forty or so of them occupied by varying colored orbs. Each of these orbs appeared to be… twinkling… with each other; perhaps they were conversing and I was not privy to their conversations. Blinking to myself, I then checked my body over to see that indeed, I have changed into pure energy without any particular form myself. The only thing different is that I wasn"t an orb, but a form of some semblance to a humanoid being; my color looked to be around the silver spectrum, as I could see a tint of red with streaks of black.
"Would the new arrival please come grab a number?" A feminine voice was heard behind me, glancing over to see that a proper old woman who looked to be about sixty sat behind the desk with some paperwork that she was busy filling out. Next to her on the desk was one of those old fashioned ticket machines that dispenses a number… so I "walked" over to the desk to take my number; [13] "Well, looks like you got an odd number there; please find a seat and fill out this paperwork, and a representative will be with you shortly." The lady hands me a clipboard with what could only be seen as a packet of paperwork on it… even in the afterlife we have to deal with this s.h.i.t. Obviously I am in h.e.l.l, as the demons and devils always enjoyed their order and bureaucracy.
Well, since I have nothing better to do than wait for my lava jacuzzi, it"s best to just do as everyone else is doing… supposedly, no frichen clue what these orbs are even doing. Grabbing the clipboard and making my way to an empty chair away from some of the other orbs, I begin to fill out the paperwork;
Name: Marc Jacobson
Race: Caucasion
Ethnicity: Irish-American
Country: United States of America
Death Date: November 26, 2018
Cause of Death: Gunshot through Heart by Lunatic
And on and on and on; it was about twenty pages front to back of nothing but basic questions and essays, seriously why would h.e.l.l want to know these things. Like what would I do if I found myself in that dumb question with one family member tied to tracks, and five other people on another track; it"s simple. Save my family member and bury the other people as penance for allowing them to die when I had a chance to save them from their fate.
As I was filling out the paperwork; a middle-aged man came out from the back door that I hadn"t noticed before in my initial scan of the area, looking around the room before grabbing a clipboard from the wall and clearing his throat:
"Maria Stanson? Death by self mutilation to the point of blood loss. Please follow me to decide your final destination please." As he stated the name and cause of death, an orb that was colored a lovely shade of purple floated over to the man, perhaps the orb form was so we didn"t figure each other out… wonder if they were able to talk to each other. Softly I let out a sigh, wondering what had happened in that poor girls life to lead to that… and also this whole final destination c.r.a.p. I hope she wasn"t Catholic, cause that sounds like suicide if I have ever seen it… and those guys really do horrid things to suiciders. In my previous job, I often fudged some results of autopsies so the parents that didn"t have the displeasure of discovering the body themselves wouldn"t have to deal with that.
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It didn"t take me that much longer to fill out the paperwork, which I quickly gave back to the proper old lady behind the counter before being told to take a seat and wait for my name to be called. I wonder what the number was for if it wasn"t for seeing who went before others; but I guess I got a bit of a wait for me. Reclining in one of the seats close to the wall so I could lay the back of my head against it. With the wait ahead of me, it was best to just let my mind wander and see where it takes me… maybe catch some sleep while all of this was going on; my "eyes" closing to darkness and all concentration was placed into my ears.
What wouldn"t come to me until some time later, was that I was basically in the other world equivalent of the DMV, only this government outfit was for those who were going to reincarnate into new bodies in new worlds. Not that I would care when I find this s.h.i.t out, as long as they don"t put me together with that f.u.c.king lunatic I"d be fine with going to h.e.l.l for some sleep.
End of Prologue