But Rachael did not sleep, nor did she sleep during the long hours of the following night. On the third night she wakened her husband suddenly from his sleep.
"Greg--Greg! Won"t you talk to me a little? I"m going mad, I think!"
"Rachael! What is it?" stammered the doctor, blinking in the dim light of Rachael"s bedside lamp. His wife, haggard, with her rich hair falling in two long braids over her shoulders, was sitting on the side of his bed. "What is it, darling--hear something?" he asked, more naturally, putting his arm about her.
"I"ve been lying awake--and lying awake!" said Rachael, panting.
"I haven"t shut my eyes--it"s nearly three. Greg, I keep seeing it--Clarence"s face, you know, with that horrible scar! What shall I do?"
Shivering, gasping, wild-eyed, she clung to him, and for a long hour he soothed her as if she had been an hysterical child. He put her into a comfortable chair, mixed her a sedative, and knelt beside her, slowly winning her back to calm and sanity again. It was terrible, of course, but no one but Clarence himself was to blame, unless it was poor Billy--
"Yes, I must see Billy when she comes back!" Rachael said quickly, when the tranquillizing voice reached this point. If Warren Gregory"s quiet mouth registered any opposition, she did not see it, and he did not express it. She was presently sound asleep, still catching a long childish breath as she slept. But she woke smiling, with all the horrid visions of the past few days apparently blotted out, and she and Warren went gayly downtown to get steamer tickets, and buy appropriate frocks and hats for the spring heat of Bermuda.
In midsummer came the inevitable invitation to visit old friends at Belvedere Bay. Rachael was pleased to accept Mrs. Moran"s hospitality for a glorious July week. Warren, to her delight, took an eightdays" holiday, and while he looked to his racquet and golf irons she packed her prettiest gowns. Belvedere Bay welcomed them rapturously, and beautiful Mrs. Gregory was the idol of the hour.
Mrs. Moulton, giving a tennis tea during this week, duly sent Mrs.
Gregory a card. But when society wondering whether Rachael would really be a guest in her own old home, had duly gathered at the Breckenridge house, young d.i.c.ky Moran was so considerate as to be flung from his riding-horse. Neither the Gregorys nor the Morans consequently appeared at the tea, but Rachael, meeting all inquirers on the Moran terrace, late in the afternoon, with the news that d.i.c.ky was quite all right, no harm done, asked prettily for details of the affair they had missed.
She told herself that the past really made no difference in the radiant present, but she knew it was not so. In a thousand little ways she had lost caste, and she saw it, if Warren did not. A certain bloom was gone. Girls were not quite as deferentially adoring, women were a little less impressed. The old prestige was somehow lessened. She knew that newcomers at the club, struck by her beauty, were a little chilled by her history. She felt the difference in the very air.
In her musings she went over the old arguments hotly. Why was she merely the "divorced Mrs. Gregory?" Why were these casual inquirers not told of Clarence, of her long endurance of neglect and shame? More than once the thought came to her, that if other, events had been as they were, and only the facts of her divorce and remarriage lacking, she would have been Clarence"s widow now.
"What"s the difference? It all comes out the same!" commented Warren, to whom she confided this thought.
"Then you and I would have been only engaged now," said Rachael, smiling. "And I would like that!"
"You mean you regret your marriage?" he laughed, his arms about her.
"I"d like to live the first days over and over and over again, Greg!" she answered pa.s.sionately.
"You are an insatiable creature!" he said. But her earnestness was beginning to puzzle him a little. She was too deeply wrapped in her love for her own happiness or his. There was something almost startling in her intensity. She was jealous of every minute that they were apart; she made no secret of her blind adoration.
Warren had at first found this touching; it had humbled him.
Later, in the first months of their marriage, he had shared it, and their mutual pa.s.sion had seemed to them both a source of inexhaustible delight. But now, even while he smiled at her, his keen sensitiveness where her dignity was concerned had shown him that there was in her att.i.tude something a little pitiful, something even a little absurd.
Judy and Gertrude and little Mrs. Sartoris listened interestedly when Rachael talked of Greg, of his likes, his dislikes, his favorite words, his old-maidish way of arranging his ties, his marvellous latest operation. But Warren, watching his wife"s flushed, lovely face, wondered if they were laughing at her. He smiled uncomfortably when she interrupted her bridge game to come across the club porch to him, to ask him if the tennis had been good, to warn him that he would catch cold if he did not instantly get out of those wet flannels, to ask Frank Whittaker what he meant by beating her big boy three sets in succession?
"Rachael, I"m dealing for you--come back here!" Gertrude might call.
"Deal away!" Rachael, one hand on Warren"s arm, would look saucily at the others over his shoulder. "I like my beau," she would a.s.sert brazenly, "and if you say a word more, I"ll kiss him here and now!"
They all shrieked derisively when the kiss was duly delivered and Gregory Warren with a self-conscious laugh had escaped to his shower. But Rachael saw nothing absurd; she told Warren that she loved him, and let them laugh if they liked!
"Listen, dearest!" he said on the last night of their stay. "Will you be a darling, and not trail round the links if we play to- morrow?"
"Why not?" asked Rachael absently, fluffing his hair from her point of vantage on the arm of his chair.
"Well, wouldn"t you rather stay up on the porch with the girls?"
"If you men want to swear at your strokes, I decline to be a party to it!" Rachael said maternally.
"I know. But, darling, it does rather affect our game," Warren said uncertainly; "that is, you don"t play, you see! And it only gets you hot and mussy, and I love my wife to be waiting when we come up. It isn"t that I don"t think you"re a darling to want to do it," he added in hasty concern.
No use. She was deeply hurt. She went to her dressing-table and began her preparations for the night with a downcast face.
Certainly she wouldn"t bother Warren. She only did it because she loved him so. A tear splashed down on her white hand.
Next day she triumphantly accompanied the golfers. Warren had petted and coaxed her out of her sulks, and she was radiant again.
When they had said their good-byes to Judy, and were spinning into town in the car that afternoon, she made him confess that she had not spoiled the game at all; he couldn"t make her believe that Frank and Tom and Peter had been pretending their pleasure at having her go along!
But later in the summer she realized that Belvedere Bay was smiling quietly at her bride-like infatuation, and she resented it deeply. The discovery came about on a lazy summer afternoon when several women, Rachael among them, were enjoying gossip and iced drinks on the Parmalees" porch. Rachael had been talking of the emeralds that Warren was having reset for her, and chanced to observe that Tiffany"s man had said that Warren"s taste in jewelry was astonishing.
"Rachael," yawned little Vivian Sartoris, "for heaven"s sake talk about something else than Warren?"
"I talk about him because I like him!" Rachael said. "Better than anybody else in the world."
"And he likes you better than anybody else in the world, I suppose?" Vivian said idly.
"He says so," Rachael answered with a demure smile. "Then that settles it!" Vivian laughed. But she and several of her intimates fell into low conversation, and the older women were presently interrupted by Vivian"s voice again. "Rachael!" she challenged, "Katrina says that SHE knows somebody Warren likes as well as he does you!"
"I did not!" protested Katrina, scarlet-cheeked and giggling, giving Vivian, who sat next her on the wide tiled steps, a violent push.
"Oh, you did, too!" one of the group exclaimed.
Katrina murmured something unintelligible.
"Well, that"s the same thing!" Vivian a.s.sured her promptly. "She says now that Warren DID like her as well, Rachael!"
"Well, don"t tell me who it is, and break my heart!" Rachael warned them. But her old sense of humor so far failed her that she could not help adding curiously, "If Warren ever cared for anybody else, he"ll tell me!"
There was a general burst of laughter, and Rachael colored.
"No, it"s n.o.body," Katrina said hastily. "It"s only idiocy!" She and the other girls laughed in a suppressed fashion for some time.
Finally, to Rachael"s secret relief, Gertrude Whittaker energetically demanded the secret. More giggling ensued. Then Katrina agreed that she would whisper it in Mrs. Whittaker"s ear, which she did. Rachael saw Gertrude color and look puzzled for a second, then she laughed scornfully.
"What geese girls are! I never heard anything so silly!" Gertrude said. Several hours later she told Rachael.
She did not tell her without some hesitation. It was so silly--it was just like that scatter-brained Katrina, she said. Rachael, proudly a.s.serting that nothing Katrina said would make any difference to her, nevertheless urged the confidence.
"Well, it"s nothing," Gertrude said at last. "This is what Katrina said: she said that Warren Gregory had liked Rachael Breckenridge as well as he liked Rachael Gregory! That was all."
Rachael looked puzzled in turn for a minute. Then she smiled proudly, and colored.
"But that"s not true," she said presently. "For I have never seen a man change as much since marriage as Warren! It"s still a perfect miracle to him. He says himself that he gets happier and happier--"
"Oh, Rachael, you"re hopeless!" Gertrude laughed, and Rachael colored again. She flushed whenever she thought of this particular visit.
Far happier were the days they spent with the Valentines at Clark"s Bar. Rachael loved them all dearly, from little Katharine to the big quiet doctor; she was not misunderstood nor laughed at here.
They swam, tramped, played cards, and talked tirelessly. Rachael slept like a child on the wide, windbathed porch. To the great satisfaction of both doctors she and Alice grew to be devoted friends, and when Warren"s holiday was over, Rachael stayed on, for a longer visit, and the men came down in the car on Fridays.
On her birthday this year her husband gave Rachael Gregory, and her heirs and a.s.signs forever, a roomy, plain old colonial farmhouse that stood near Alice"s house, in a ring of great elms, looking down on the green level surface of the sea. Rachael accepted it with wild delight. She loved the big, homelike halls, the simple fireplaces, the green blinds that shut a sweet twilight into the empty rooms. Her own barns, her own strip of beach, her own side yard where she and Alice could sit and talk, she took eager possession of them all.