Her mouth quivered. "Stand up to it!" . . . The voice--Patrick"s voice--seemed to sound in her ear . . . "Stand up to it, little old pal!"
She bit back the sob that climbed to her throat, and stood silently facing the enemy, as it were.
This was the end, then, of one chapter of her existence--the chapter of sheltered, happy life at Barrow, and in these quiet moments, alone for the last time with Patrick Lovell, Sara tried to gather strength and courage from her memories of his cheery optimism to face gamely whatever might befall her in the big world into which she must so soon adventure.
CHAPTER III
A SHEAF OF MEMORIES
It was over. The master of Barrow had been carried shoulder-high to the great vault where countless Lovells slept their last sleep, the blinds had been drawn up, letting in the wintry sunlight once again, and the mourners had gone their ways. Only the new owner of the Court still lingered, and even he would be leaving very soon now.
Sara, her slim, boyish build, with its long line of slender hip, accentuated by the clinging black of her gown, moved listlessly across the hall to where Major Durward was standing smoking by the big open fire, waiting for the car which was to take him to the station.
He made as though to throw his cigarette away at her approach, but she gestured a hasty negative.
"No, don"t," she said. "I like it. It seems to make things a little more natural. Uncle Pat"--with a wan smile--"was always smoking."
Her sombre eyes were shadowed and sad, and there was a pinched, drawn look about her nostrils. Major Durward regarded her with a concerned expression on his kindly face.
"You will miss him badly," he said.
"Yes, I shall miss him,"--simply. She returned his glance frankly. "You are very like him, you know," she added suddenly.
It was true. The big, soldierly man beside her, with his jolly blue eyes, grey hair, and short-clipped military moustache, bore a striking resemblance to the Patrick Lovell of ten years ago, before ill-health had laid its finger upon him, and during the difficult days that succeeded her uncle"s death Sara had unconsciously found a strange kind of comfort in the likeness. She had dreaded inexpressibly the advent of the future owner of Barrow, but, when he had arrived, his resemblance to his dead cousin, and a certain similarity of gesture and of voice, common enough in families, had at once established a sense of kinship, which had deepened with her recognition of Durward"s genuine kind-heartedness and solicitude for her comfort.
He had immediately a.s.sumed control of affairs, taking all the inevitable detail of arrangement off her shoulders, yet deferring to her as though she were still just as much mistress of the Court as she had been before her uncle"s death. In every way he had tried to ease and smooth matters for her, and she felt proportionately grateful to him.
"Then, if you think I"m like him," said Durward gently, "will you let me try to take his place a little? I mean," he explained hastily, fearing she might misunderstand him, "that you will miss his guardianship and care of you, as well as the good pal you found in him. Will you let me try to fill in the gaps, if--if you should want advice, or service--anything over which a male man can be a bit useful? Oh----"
breaking off with a short, embarra.s.sed laugh--"it is so difficult to explain what I do mean!"
"I think I know," said Sara, smiling faintly. "You mean that now that Uncle Pat has gone, you don"t want me to feel quite adrift in the world."
The big man, hampered by his masculine shyness of a difficult situation, smiled back at her, relieved.
"Yes, that"s it, that"s it!" he agreed eagerly. "I want you to regard me as a--a sort of sheet-anchor upon which you can pull in a storm."
"Thank you," said Sara. "I will. But I hope there won"t be storms of such magnitude that I shall need to pull very hard."
Durward smoked furiously for a moment. Then he burst forth--
"You can"t imagine what a brute I feel for turning you out of the Court.
I wish it need not be. But the Lovells have always lived at the old place, and my wife--"
"Naturally." She interrupted him gently. "Naturally, she wishes to live here. I owe you no grudge for that," smiling. "When--how soon do you think of coming? I will make my arrangements accordingly."
"We should like to come as soon as possible, really," he admitted reluctantly. "I have the chance of leasing Durward Park, if the tenant can have what practically amounts to immediate possession. And of course, in the circ.u.mstances, I should be glad to get the Durward property off my hands."
"Of course you would." Sara nodded understandingly. "If you could let me have a few days in which to find some rooms--"
"No, no," he broke in eagerly. "I want you still to regard Barrow as your headquarters--to stay on here with us until you have fixed some permanent arrangement that suits you."
She was touched by the kindly suggestion; nevertheless, she shook her head with decision.
"It is more than kind of you to think of such a thing," she said gratefully. "But it is quite out of the question. Why, I am not even a cousin several times removed! I have no claim at all. Mrs. Durward--"
"Will be delighted. She asked me to be sure and tell you so. Please, Miss Tennant, don"t refuse me. Don"t"--persuasively--"oblige us to feel more brutal interlopers than we need."
Still she hesitated.
"If I were sure--" she began doubtfully.
"You may be--absolutely sure. There!"--with a sigh of relief--"that"s settled. But, as I can see you"re the kind of person whose conscientious scruples will begin to worry you the moment I"m gone"--he smiled--"my wife will write to you. Promise not to run away in the meantime?"
"I promise," said Sara. She held out her hand. "And--thank you." Her eyes, suddenly misty, supplemented the baldness of the words.
He took the outstretched hand in a close, friendly grip.
"Good. That"s the car, I think," as the even purring of a motor sounded from outside. "I must be off. But it"s only _au revoir_, remember."
She walked with him to the door, and stood watching until the car was lost in sight round a bend of the drive. Then, as she turned back into the hall, the emptiness of the house seemed to close down about her all at once, like a pall.
Amid the manifold duties and emergencies of the last few days she had hardly had time to realize the immensity of her loss. Practical matters had forcibly obtruded themselves upon her consideration--the necessity of providing accommodation for the various relatives who had attended the funeral, the frequent consultations that Major Durward, to all intents and purposes a stranger to the ways of Barrow, had been obliged to hold with her, the reading of the will--all these had combined to keep her in a state of mental and physical alertness which had mercifully precluded retrospective thought.
But now the necessity for _doing_ anything was past; there were no longer any claims upon her time, nothing to distract her, and she had leisure to visualize the full significance of Patrick"s death and all that it entailed.
Rather languidly she mounted the stairs to her own room, and drawing up a low chair to the fire, sat staring absently into its glowing heart.
Virtually, she was alone in the world. Even Major Durward, who had been so infinitely kind, was not bound to her by any ties other than those forged of his own friendly feelings. True, he had been Patrick"s cousin.
But Patrick, although he had made up Sara"s whole world, had been entirely unrelated to her.
Her heart throbbed with a sudden rush of intense grat.i.tude towards the man who had so amply fulfilled his trust as guardian, and she glanced up wistfully at the big photograph of him which stood upon the chimney-piece.
Propped against the photo-frame was a square white envelope on which was written: _To be given to my ward, Sara Tennant, after my death_.
The family solicitor had handed it to her the previous day, after the reading of the will, but the demands upon her time and attention had been so many, owing to the number of relatives who temporarily filled the house, that she had laid it on one side for perusal when she should be alone once more.
The sight of the familiar handwriting brought a swift mist of tears to her eyes, and she hesitated a little before opening the sealed envelope.
It was strange to realize that here was some message for her from Patrick himself, but that no matter what the envelope might contain, she would be able to give back no answer, make no reply. The knowledge seemed to set him very far away from her, and for a few moments she sobbed quietly, feeling utterly solitary and alone.
Presently she brushed the tears from her eyes and slit open the flap of the envelope. Inside was a half-sheet of notepaper wrapped about a small old-fashioned key, and on the outer fold was written: "_The key of the Chippendale bureau_." That was all.
For an instant Sara was puzzled. Then she remembered that amongst Patrick"s personal bequests to her had been that of the small mahogany bureau which stood near the window of his bedroom. It had not occurred to her at the time that its contents might have any interest for her; in fact, she had supposed it to be empty. But now she realized that there was evidently something within it which Patrick must have valued, seeing he had guarded the key so carefully and directed its delivery to her through the reliable hands of his solicitor.
Rather glad of anything that might help to occupy her thoughts, she decided to investigate the bureau at once, and accordingly made her way to Patrick"s bedroom.
On the threshold she paused, her heart contracting painfully as the spick and span aspect of the room, its ordered absence of any trace of occupation, reminded her that its one-time owner would never again have any further need of it.