The Immortal Moment

Chapter 35

"No. Physically, she"s far stronger than Barbara. She"s what you call morally delicate."

She flushed. "What do you mean, Robert?"

"Well--not able to bear things. For instance, we"d a small child staying with us once. It turned out that she wasn"t a nice child at all. We didn"t know it, though. But Janet had a perfect horror of her. It"s as if she had a sort of intuition. She was so unhappy about it that we had to send the child away."

His forehead was drawn into a frown of worry and perplexity.

"I don"t see how she"s to grow up. It makes me feel so awfully responsible. The world isn"t an entirely pretty place, you know, and it seems such a cruel shame to bring a child like that into it. Doesn"t it?"

"Yes."

"Somehow I think you"ll understand her, Kitty."

"Yes, Robert, I understand."

She came to him. She laid her hand on the sleeve of his coat, and stood by him. Her eyes were shining through some dew that was not tears.

"What is it, Kitty?"

"Will you marry me soon?" she said. "Very soon?" she whispered. "I--I can"t wait." She hid her face against his arm.

He thought it was the motherhood in her that was moved, that pleaded, impatient for its hour.

"Why should we wait? Do you suppose I want to?"

"Hush!" she said. "They"re coming."

They came a little solemnly, as beseemed a festival. Janet, in her long white pinafore, looked more than ever the spiritual thing she was. Her long brown hair hung down her cheeks, straight and smooth as a parted veil, sharpening her small face, that flickered as a flame flickers in troubled air. Beside her little Barbara bloomed and glowed, with cheeks full-blown, and cropped head flowering into curls that stood on end in brown tufts, and tawny feathers, and little crests of gold. They took their places, pensively, at the table.

They had beautiful manners, Robert"s children; little exquisite, gentle ways of approaching and of handling things. They held themselves very erect, with a secure, diminutive distinction. Kitty"s heart sank deeper as she looked at them. Even Barbara, who was so very young, carried her small perfections intact through all the spontaneities of her behaviour.

All through tea-time little Barbara, pursued by her dream, talked incessantly of castles in the sand. And when she was tired of talking she began to sing.

"Darling," said Jane, "we don"t sing at tea-time."

"_I_ do," said little Barbara, and laughed.

Jane laughed too, hysterically.

Then the spirit of little Barbara entered into Jane, and made her ungovernably gay. It pa.s.sed into Kitty, and ran riot in her blood and nerves. Whenever Barbara laughed Kitty laughed, and when Kitty laughed Robert laughed too. Even Janet gave a little shriek now and then. The children thought it was all because they had had strawberries and cream for tea, and were going down to the sea to build castles in the sand.

All afternoon, till dinner-time, Kitty laboured on the sands, building castles as if she had never done anything else in her life. The Hankins watched her from their seat on the rocks in the angle of the Cliff.

"We were mistaken. She must be all right. How pretty she is, too, poor thing," said Mrs. Hankin to her husband.

"How pretty she is, how absolutely lovable and good," said Robert to himself as he watched her, while Barbara, a tired little labourer, lay stretched in her lap. She was sitting on a rock under the Cliff, with the great brow of it for a canopy. Her eyes were lowered, and hidden by their deep lids. She was smiling at the child who leaned back in her arms, crushing a soft cheek against her breast.

He threw himself down beside her. He had just finished a prodigious fortress, with earthworks and trenches extending to the sea.

"Kitty, Kitty," he said, "you"re only a child yourself, like Janey.

She"s perfectly happy building castles in the sand--so are you. You"re a perfect baby."

"We"re all babies, Robert, building castles in the sand. And you"re the biggest baby of the lot."

"I don"t care. I"ve built the biggest castle."

"Look at Janet," said Kitty. "She"ll be grown up before any of us."

The child sat on a rock with Jane. But, from the distance that she kept, she looked at her father and Kitty from time to time. All afternoon Janet had clung to Jane. But when bed-time came Robert took her aside and whispered something to her. Going home she walked by Kitty, and put her hand in hers.

"Daddy said I"m to be very kind to you."

"Did he? That"s very kind of daddy."

"Daddy"s always kind to people. Especially when they"ve not been very happy. Really and truly I"m going to be kind. But you won"t mind if I don"t love you _very_ soon, will you?"

"Of course I won"t. Only don"t leave it too late, darling."

"Well, I don"t know," said Janet thoughtfully; "we"ve lots of time."

"Have we?"

"Heaps and heaps. You see, I love Auntie Janey, and it might hurt her feelings."

"I see."

"But I"m going to give you something," said Janet presently.

"I don"t want you to give me anything that belongs to Auntie Janey."

"No," said Janet; "I shall give you something of my own."

"Oh! And you can"t tell me what it"s going to be?"

"I must think about it." The little girl became lost in thought.

"Barbara likes kissing people. I don"t."

"So I see. It won"t be kisses, then?"

"No; it won"t be kisses. It will," she reiterated, "be something of my own."

She dropped Kitty"s hand.

"You won"t mind if I go to Auntie Janey now?"

Kitty told Janey about it afterward, as they sat alone in the lounge before dinner.

"You mustn"t mind, Kitty dear," said Jane. "It only means that she"s a faithful little soul. She"ll be just as faithful to you some day."

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