Gordon Atterbury hesitated a moment, but getting no reply save an inclination of the head, took up his hat.
"Ahem--I think that is all I have to say, Mr. Hodder. Good morning."
Even then Hodder did not answer, but rose and held open the door. As he made his exit under the strange scrutiny of the clergyman"s gaze the little vestryman was plainly uncomfortable. He cleared his throat once more, halted, and then precipitately departed.
Hodder went to the window and thoughtfully watched the hurrying figure of Mr. Atterbury until it disappeared, almost skipping, around the corner .... The germ of truth, throughout the centuries, had lost nothing of its dynamic potentialities. If released and proclaimed it was still powerful enough to drive the world to insensate anger and opposition....
As he stood there, lost in reflection, a shining automobile drew up at the curb, and from it descended a firm lady in a tight-fitting suit whom he recognized as Mrs Wallis Plimpton. A moment later she had invaded the office--for no less a word may be employed to express her physical aggressiveness, the glowing health which she radiated.
"Good morning, Mr. Hodder," she said, seating herself in one of the straight-backed chairs. "I have been so troubled since you preached that sermon yesterday, I could scarcely sleep. And I made up my mind I"d come to you the first thing this morning. Mr. Plimpton and I have been discussing it. In fact, people are talking of nothing else. We dined with the Laureston Greys last night, and they, too, were full of it."
Charlotte Plimpton looked at him, and the flow of her words suddenly diminished. And she added, a little lamely for her, "Spiritual matters in these days are so difficult, aren"t they?"
"Spiritual matters always were difficult, Mrs. Plimpton," he said.
"I suppose so," she a.s.sented hurriedly, with what was intended for a smile. "But what I came to ask you is this--what are we to teach our children?"
"Teach them the truth," the rector replied.
"One of the things which troubled me most was your reference to modern criticism," she went on, recovering her facility. "I was brought up to believe that the Bible was true. The governess--Miss Standish, you know, such a fine type of Englishwoman--reads the children Bible stories every Sunday evening. They adore them, and little Wallis can repeat them almost by heart--the pillar of cloud by day, Daniel in the lions" den, and the Wise Men from the East. If they aren"t true, some one ought to have told us before now."
A note of injury had crept into her voice.
"How do you feel about these things yourself?" Holder inquired.
"How do I feel? Why, I have never thought about them very much--they were there, in the Bible!"
"You were taught to believe them?"
"Of course," she exclaimed, resenting what seemed a reflection on the Gore orthodoxy.
"Do they in any manner affect your conduct?"
"My conduct?" she repeated. "I don"t know what you mean. I was brought up in the church, and Mr. Plimpton has always gone, and we are bringing up the children to go. Is that what you mean?"
"No," Hodder answered, patiently, "that is not what I mean. I ask whether these stories in any way enter into your life, become part of you, and tend to make you a more useful woman?"
"Well--I have never considered them in that way," she replied, a little perplexed.
"Do you believe in them yourself?"
"Why--I don"t know,--I"ve never thought. I don"t suppose I do, absolutely--not in those I have mentioned."
"And you think it right to teach things to your children which you do not yourself believe?"
"How am I to decide?" she demanded.
"First by finding out yourself what you do believe," he replied, with a touch of severity.
"Mr. Hodder!" she cried in a scandalized voice, "do you mean to say that I, who have been brought up in this church, do not know what Christianity is."
He looked at her and shook his head.
"You must begin by being honest with yourself," he went on, not heeding her shocked expression. "If you are really in earnest in this matter, I should be glad to help you all I can. But I warn you there is no achievement in the world more difficult than that of becoming a Christian. It means a conversion of your whole being something which you cannot now even imagine. It means a consuming desire which,--I fear,--in consideration of your present mode of life, will be difficult to acquire."
"My present mode of life!" she gasped.
"Precisely," said the rector. He was silent, regarding, her. There was discernible not the slightest crack of crevice in the enamel of this woman"s worldly armour.
For the moment her outraged feelings were forgotten. The man had fascinated her. To be told, in this authoritative manner, that she was wicked was a new and delightful experience. It brought back to her the real motive of her visit, which had in reality been inspired not only by the sermon of the day before, but by sheer curiosity.
"What would you have me do?" she demanded.
"Find yourself."
"Do you mean to say that I am not--myself?" she asked, now completely bewildered.
"I mean to say that you are n.o.body until you achieve conviction."
For Charlotte Plimpton, nee Gore, to be told in her own city, by the rector of her own church that she was n.o.body was an event hitherto inconceivable! It was perhaps as extraordinary that she did not resent.
it. Curiosity still led her on.
"Conviction?" she repeated. "But I have conviction, Mr. Hodder. I believe in the doctrines of the Church."
"Belief!" he exclaimed, and checked himself strongly. "Conviction through feeling. Not until then will you find what you were put in the world for."
"But my husband--my children? I try to do my duty."
"You must get a larger conception of it," Hodder replied.
"I suppose you mean," she declared, "that I am to spend the rest of my life in charity."
"How you would spend the rest of your life would be revealed to you,"
said the rector.
It was the weariness in his tone that piqued her now, the intimation that he did not believe in her sincerity--had not believed in it from the first. The life-long vanity of a woman used to be treated with consideration, to be taken seriously, was aroused. This extraordinary man had refused to enter into the details which she inquisitively craved.
Charlotte Plimpton rose.
"I shall not bother you any longer at present, Mr. Hodder," she said sweetly. "I know you must have, this morning especially, a great deal to trouble you."
He met her scrutiny calmly.
"It is only the things we permit to trouble us that do so, Mrs.
Plimpton," he replied. "My own troubles have arisen largely from a lack of faith on the part of those whom I feel it is my duty to influence."
It was then she delivered her parting shot, which she repeated, with much satisfaction, to her husband that evening. She had reached the door. "Was there a special service at Calvary yesterday?" she asked innocently, turning back.
"Not that I know of."