"When the cloud is lifted: not before. And--George--not a word about me.
Don"t tell--yet--even Elsie."
CHAPTER VI
SOMETHING MORE HAPPENS
Checkley held the door of the office wide open, and invited Elsie to enter. The aspect of the room, solid of furniture, severe in its fittings, with its vast table covered with papers, struck her with a kind of terror. At the table sat her guardian, austere of countenance.
All the way along she had been imagining a dialogue. He would begin with certain words. She would reply, firmly but respectfully, with certain other words. He would go on. She would again reply. And so on. Everybody knows the consolations of imagination in framing dialogues at times of trouble. They never come off. The beginning is never what is expected, and the sequel, therefore, has to be changed on the spot. The conditions of the interview had not been realised by Elsie. Also the beginning was not what she expected. For her guardian, instead of frowning with a brow of corrugated iron, and holding up a finger of warning, received her more pleasantly than she had imagined it possible for him, bade her sit down, and leaned back, looking at her kindly.
"And so," he said, "you are twenty-one--twenty-one--to-day. I am no longer your guardian. You are twenty-one. Everything that is past seems to have happened yesterday. So that it is needless to say that you were a baby only yesterday."
"Yes; I am really twenty-one."
"I congratulate you. To be twenty-one is, I believe, for a young lady at least, a pleasant time of life. For my own part, I have almost forgotten the memory of youth. Perhaps I never had the time to be young. Certainly I have never understood why some men regret their youth so pa.s.sionately. As for your s.e.x, Elsie, I know very little of it except in the way of business. In that way, which does not admit of romance, I must say that I have sometimes found ladies importunate, tenacious, exacting, persistent, and even revengeful."
"Oh!" said Elsie, with a little winning smile of conciliation. This was only a beginning--a prelude--before the unpleasantness.
"That, Elsie, is my unfortunate experience of women--always in the way of business, which of course may bring out the worst qualities.
In society, of which I have little experience, they are doubtless--charming--charming." He repeated the word, as if he had found an adjective of whose meaning he was not quite clear. "An old bachelor is not expected, at the age of seventy-five, to know much about such a subject. The point before us is that you have this day arrived at the mature age of twenty-one. That is the first thing, and I congratulate you. The first thing."
"I wonder," thought Elsie timidly, "when he will begin upon the next thing--the real thing."
There lay upon the table before him a paper with notes upon it. He took it up, looked at it, and laid it down again. Then he turned to Elsie and smiled--he actually smiled--he unmistakably smiled. "At twenty-one," he said, "some young ladies who are heiresses come into their property----"
"Those who are heiresses. Unhappily, I am not."
"Come into their property--their property. It must be a beautiful thing for a girl to come into property, unexpectedly, at twenty-one. For a man, a temptation to do nothing and to make no more money. Bad! Bad! But for a girl already engaged, a girl who wants money, a girl who is engaged--eh--to a penniless young solicitor----"
Elsie turned crimson. This was the thing she expected.
"Under such circ.u.mstances, I say, such a stroke of fortune would be providential and wonderful, would it not?"
She blushed and turned pale, and blushed again. She also felt a strong disposition to cry--but repressed that disposition.
"In your case, for instance, such a windfall would be most welcome. Your case is rather a singular case. You do not belong to a family which has generally disregarded money--quite the reverse--you should inherit the love of money--yet you propose to throw away what I believe are very good prospects, and----"
"My only prospect is to marry George Austin."
"So you think. I have heard from your mother, and I have seen your sister Hilda. They object very strongly to the engagement."
"I know, of course, what they would say."
"Therefore, I need not repeat it," replied Mr. Dering drily. "I learn, then, that you are not only engaged to this young gentleman, but that you are also proposing to marry upon the small income which he now possesses."
"Yes--we are prepared to begin the world upon that income."
"Your mother asked me what chance he had in his profession. In this office he can never rise to a considerable salary as managing clerk. If he had money, he might buy a partnership. But he has none, and his friends have none. And the profession is congested. He may remain all his life in a position not much better than he now occupies. The prospect, Elsie, is not brilliant."
"No--we are fully aware of that. And yet----"
"Allow me, my dear child. You are yourself--we will say for the moment--without any means of your own."
"I have nothing."
"Or any expectations, except from your mother, who is not yet sixty."
"I could not count upon my mother"s death. Besides, she says that, if I persist, she will not leave me anything at all."
"So much I understand from herself. Her present intention is to remove your name from her will, in case you go on with this proposed marriage."
"My mother will do what she pleases with her property," said Elsie. "If she thinks that I will give way to a threat of this kind, she does not know me."
"Do not let us speak of threats. I am laying before you facts. Here they are plainly. Young Austin has a very small income: he has very little prospect of getting a substantial income: you, so far as you know, have nothing; and, also so far as you know, you have no prospect of anything.
These are the facts, are they not?"
"Yes--I suppose these are the facts. We shall be quite poor--very likely, quite poor always." The tears rose to her eyes. But this was not a place for crying.
"I want you to understand these facts very clearly," Mr. Dering insisted. "Believe me, I do not wish to give you pain."
"All this," said Elsie, with the beginnings of the family obstinacy in her eyes, "I clearly understand. I have had them put before me too often."
"I also learn from your sister, Lady Dering, that if you abandon this marriage she is ready to do anything for you that she can. Her house, her carriage, her servants--you can command them all, if you please.
This you know. Have you considered the meaning of what you propose? Can you consider it calmly?"
"I believe we have."
"On the one side poverty--not what is called a small income. Many people live very well on what is called a small income--but grinding, hard poverty, which exacts real privations and burdens you with unexpected loads. My dear young lady, you have been brought up to a certain amount of plenty and ease, if not to luxury. Do you think you can get along without plenty and ease?"
"If George can, I can."
"Can you become a servant--cook, housemaid, lady"s-maid--as well as a wife--a nurse as well as a mother?"
"If George is made happier by my becoming anything--anything, it will only make me happier. Mr. Dering, I am sure you wish me well--you are my father"s old friend--you have always advised my mother in her troubles--my brother was articled to you--but----" She paused, remembering that he had not been her brother"s best friend.
"I mean the best possible for you. Meantime, you are quite fixed in your own mind: you are set upon this thing. That is clear. There is one other way of looking at it. You yourself seem chiefly desirous, I think, to make the man you love happy. So much the better for him.--Are you quite satisfied that the other party to the agreement, your lover, will remain happy while he sees you slaving for him, while he feels his own helplessness, and while he gets no relief from the grinding poverty of his household--while--lastly--he sees his sons taking their place on a lower level, and his daughters taking a place below the rank of gentlewoman?"
"I reply by another question.--You have had George in your office as articled clerk and managing clerk for eight years. Is he, or is he not, steadfast, clear-headed, one who knows his own mind, and one who can be trusted in all things?"
"Perhaps," said Mr. Dering, inclining his head. "How does that advance him?"
"Then, if you trust him, why should not I trust him? I trust George altogether--altogether. If he does not get on, it will be through no fault of his. We shall bear our burden bravely, believe me, Mr. Dering.
You will not hear him--or me--complain. Besides, I am full of hope. Oh!
it can never be in this country that a man who is a good workman should not be able to get on. Then I can paint a little--not very well, perhaps. But I have thought--you will not laugh at me--that I might paint portraits and get a little money that way."