Unveil Me.
The Jaded Series.
Alex Grayson.
DEDICATION.
This book is dedicated to all the people out there living with chronic diseases. Your bravery and tenacity inspired me. Here"s to hoping some day we find cures for every one of these maladies, so no one ever has to suffer with them again.
Book Blurb.
Andrew Donovan is the outrageous goofy guy everyone loves. In any setting he takes center stage and makes everyone laugh; from his ridiculously funny t-shirts, to his naughty jokes, to his shameless flirting with anything that walks, male or female. But what you see on the outside can sometimes be deceiving. Andrew has a secret. A secret that"s slowly withering away the fun-loving guy everyone knows. A secret even his closest friends know nothing about.
When he first sees Jase in a picture, he knows instantly he"s found the one person who will be his forever. He"s just impatiently biding his time until Jase gets to Jaded Hollow. Andrew is torn. On one hand, he"s finally found the other half of his soul, while on the other, he"s slowly dying inside. Tragedy is on the horizon and there"s nothing he can do to stop it.
Jase Matthews comes to Jaded Hollow a dead man walking. He knows it"s only a matter of time before they find him. There is no way they"ll let him live. He"s instantly drawn to Andrew, but he refuses the connection, knowing his days are numbered. However, it"s not long before he realizes the pull Andrew has on him is something he can"t fight.
Can Andrew find the courage to reveal to his loved ones the secret he"s kept for years? Will Jase be the man to help him overcome the grief he feels inside? And what happens when Jase"s past catches up to him and threatens to take away the man Andrew"s waited forever to meet?.
Andrew.
Have you ever wanted something so bad every muscle tenses and your body almost locks up with just the thought of having it? Your heart races, your palms sweat, your breathing escalates, and you feel a thousand tiny b.u.t.terflies fluttering around in your stomach? You would do just about anything, say just about anything, be just about anything to get that one thing? You would take d.a.m.n near anything out if it got in your way. And the thought of not getting it crushes your lungs so completely that it"s hard to draw in breath, sending shivers throughout your body, leaving you physically ill. You would no longer care if your lungs drew in life-saving oxygen or your heart pumped blood throughout your veins.
That was the way I felt when Chris first showed me the picture of her brother, Jase. I was completely and utterly transfixed by the man in the picture. I knew right then and there, at that very second of time as I stared at the most beautiful man I had ever seen, I would do anything to make him mine. I have no idea what drew me to him; I knew nothing about him, h.e.l.l, he could be a total d.i.c.k, but it didn"t matter. There was nothing anyone could do to stop me. It was inevitable and the solid truth.
I"m sure I probably bugged the s.h.i.t out of Chris, and anyone else around, with the many times I asked her about him, or when he would be in Jaded Hollow. But I didn"t give a f.u.c.k. I was impatient. The need to see him in person was suffocating. I literally felt like I couldn"t breathe properly once she showed me that picture, and I knew I would get to meet the one man I would spend the rest of my life with.
I know it sounds crazy and irrational, but it was how I felt. Each time Chris told me the date was pushed back for whatever reason, I wanted to yank my hair out and throw a fit. Yes, a big grown man like myself with tats and piercings wanted to throw a fit like a f.u.c.king preschooler. Every time Chris revealed little snippets of the s.h.i.t Jase had to put up with from their parents, I wanted to commit cold-blooded murder. Was it ridiculous? Absolutely. Did it make me seem crazy? Probably. Did I care? f.u.c.k no.
For years I thought I"d found the man that I wanted forever. It didn"t matter he was about as un.o.btainable as becoming the president of the United States would be for Adolf Hitler. I coveted him in secret, knowing nothing would come of it. I wanted Jaxon Walker like a starved man wanted a big juicy steak. It hurt every time I saw him with a different woman, but I knew it was never meant to be. I think what hurt the most was the reason behind Jaxon and his women. He didn"t do it because he was looking for the right woman. He did it because of the pain he was going through because of a woman. I wanted to be there for him. I wanted him to choose me to comfort him, but I knew it would never happen. When Bailey came along, it didn"t hurt so badly. I knew from the beginning she was different. She was what Jaxon needed all along. It still hurt, but I was happy for them both.
"Hey sweetie, would you like a refill?" Jaxon and Mia"s grandmother, Maggie, asks, pulling me from my thoughts.
I look up at the woman the whole town has dubbed their Gram, and smile. "Yes ma"am. And can you add a slice of your apple crisp pie and bring me the check?"
She pats my cheek twice before refreshing my coffee and turning to get my slice of pie.
"Are you ever going to choose someone else"s dessert, Andy?" she asks, handing me the slice of heaven and the white slip of paper with my total.
An ache starts in my chest at the use of the nickname. She"s one of only two people I allow to use it. I"ve tried over the years to get her to stop, but it"s no use. Gram does what she wants. Not wanting to hurt her feelings, I"ve stopped trying, even though I feel a twinge every time she uses it. I let everyone believe I hate the name because it sounds like a girly gay name, but that"s not the true reason. Every time I"m called Andy it reminds me of a certain person who holds my heart. A person who very well may be unjustly wiped from the world. When that person calls me Andy, I can"t help the big grin that comes across my face. Hearing Andy from their lips is one of the sweetest things ever.
I grab the container of sugar and pour some in my coffee as I tell her, "You know I"ll never cheat on you with another dessert. Your desserts are the s.h.i.t. Why would I want to try another?"
Every month customers submit desserts they want featured at Maggie"s Diner. A few are selected and put on the menu. At the end of the month there"s a vote to see whose was the best. The winner gets one free meal a day for the next month.
"Oh posh! You never give anyone"s a chance. You may like some more than mine," Maggie says, unloading the drying rack.
"That may be so, but I don"t plan on finding out. I"ve eaten your desserts since I was little and I"ve never come across one I didn"t like. Sorry, Grams, but you"re stuck with me always choosing yours." I give her a cheeky grin.
I dig in to the deliciousness before me and moan. Maggie just rolls her eyes and walks down to help another customer. I grin at her retreating back.
I hear the bell over the door jingle and turn to see who it is. Beautiful Bailey walks in first with her hair high on her head, a light pink diaper bag slung over her shoulder. The difference between the Bailey I first met and Bailey now is astounding. The old Bailey wouldn"t be caught dead showing off the scar that runs from the corner of her right eye to her ear. This Bailey is self-a.s.sured and knows the scar shows her strength. It shows her bravery and perseverance. It shows that even though you may be beaten down to your lowest, you can still get back up and fight. I am so proud of her, and I"m one lucky b.a.s.t.a.r.d to be able to call her friend.
Right on her heels is Jaxon, carrying a wide-awake and giggling Amari on his arm. The kid is as cute and sweet as a b.u.t.ton, but my gaze is captured, like always, by Jaxon. Jaxon would slaughter me if he knew the fantasies I"ve had of him. I feel my d.i.c.k twitch in my jeans, remembering some of them.
I pull my eyes away from Jaxon and see Chris walking in next. Every time I see the woman I want to squeeze her tight. I feel this way because of all the help she"s given Bailey over the years, when no one else was there for her. Chris is a very special person.
She has a huge grin on her face and I wonder why. I get my answer when the last person steps through the door. My eyes zero in on the one person it seems like I"ve waited my entire life to meet. The one man who has my blood pumping erratically every time I look at his now-worn picture. The man who has my breath catching and my body locking tight to keep me in my seat, because I don"t want to scare him off by approaching and stealing him away.
f.u.c.k!.
Chris didn"t tell me he was coming today. Today, of all days, is not a good day. I have to leave and there"s no way I can get out of it.
Motherf.u.c.ker!.
Instead of finishing my pie and paying my bill like I need to, I sit there and take in all that is Jase in the flesh. How is it possible he looks even better in person? I thought he was perfect in the picture, but the man standing across the diner? This man is so d.a.m.n perfect it almost hurts my eyes.
He"s tall, not as tall as Jaxon or me, but still tall. Just like in the picture, he has his gorgeous dark-blond hair in a low messy ponytail. I want to yank the band out and run my fingers through it, grab a handful and hold his head while I take his lips with mine. I bet his stubble would feel heavenly against my skin. The white t-shirt he"s wearing molds to his chest, showing off the muscles beneath the material. His arms have multiple tattoos. Not sleeves, but there are definitely more than just a few. The faded jeans he has on hang low on narrow hips and I"m sure will showcase his a.s.s perfectly. I can"t see his eyes, something that"s bugged the s.h.i.t out of me from the moment I first laid eyes on his picture, because he has on a pair of dark shades.
I take a deep breath and feel my lungs expanding more than they have in a long time. The whole of Jase in the flesh is so much more than I thought. My fingers itch to touch him. My lips tingle to taste him. My nose twitches to take in his scent. My eyes gobble up every inch of him. My ears strain to hear his voice. And my f.u.c.king d.i.c.k stiffens, trying to lead me to him.
All four of them stand there for a minute, looking around, trying to find a spot to sit. As it"s still the morning rush, there aren"t too many places. Bailey sees me first, sitting there drooling like an animal over prey. She nudges Chris on the shoulder and points to me. I see this out the corner of my eye, as there"s no way can I take my eyes off Jase.
They make their way through the crowded diner toward me. I watch Jase"s swagger, which makes my d.i.c.k jump even more. He hasn"t noticed me yet, so I have a few extra seconds to watch him.
I take a quick look at the others. Chris"s smile gets bigger the closer they get. Bailey"s lips tip up into a smile as well. Jaxon has a smirk on his. They all know of my obsession with Jase.
Finally, f.u.c.king finally, Jase sees me. He flips up his gla.s.ses to rest on top of his head, and I"m nearly knocked off my f.u.c.king stool at my first glimpse of his eyes. They are the clearest blue I"ve ever seen, and suck me in immediately. It takes d.a.m.n near every bit of strength to pull mine away and look at Chris.
Chris stops right in front of me, almost bouncing on her heels in excitement. The girl is a complete loon, but I still love her. Bailey"s on her right side, with Jaxon and Amari behind her. Jase steps next to Chris and a light smell of the ocean hits me. My eyes flicker to him before I forcefully bring them back to Chris.
"Hey, Chris, Bailey, and Jaxon." I look at each of them as I say their names, then back at Jase and rake my eyes all over him, not in the least bit hiding my interest, before saying, "Hey there, baby."
By the way his body jerks, I can tell he"s taken aback by my comment, but he recovers quickly, tipping his chin up in greeting.
"Hi, Andrew," Bailey says in her sweet innocent voice.
Jaxon gives a chin lift, trying to catch Amari"s hands that are grabbing at her mom"s hair.
"Hey, Andrew!" Chris says in a chirpy voice. "What are you up to today?"
I narrow my eyes at her. What in the h.e.l.l is she doing? She knows I"ve been waiting weeks to meet her brother. The little t.w.a.t is making me suffer, and she"s enjoying watching me do it. If she doesn"t stop this s.h.i.t, I"ll introduce myself. I"m sure as s.h.i.t not shy and can take care of it myself, but I"m trying to play it cool. He doesn"t need to know that I already know who he is and have been waiting on tenterhooks for him to get here. That may freak him out just a bit.
With a tight voice, I tell her, "Not a lot. I"m leaving to go out of town in a few minutes. Got business to take care of."
Jase shifts beside Chris and another wave of ocean hits me. I grip the back of the stool and the counter tightly. I"m about to open my mouth when Chris finally puts me out of my misery.
"Aww... that"s too bad," she says with fake sadness. "I wanted you to meet my brother, Jase, and ask if you wanted to have breakfast with us."
Through gritted teeth, I tell her, "Well, maybe if you had given me a heads-up I would have, honey, but since you didn"t, I"ve already had breakfast."
Enough of this bulls.h.i.t. I turn my head to Jase and hold out my hand, excitement running through me at the thought of finally touching him.
"Hey, Jase. I"m Andrew."
He eyes me for a second before he lifts his hand and places it in mine. The shock is instant and strong. Sizzles run up my arm as I grip his hand tightly. He has a firm grip and his hand is rough. I bet that s.h.i.t would feel good gliding along my body.
I don"t ever want to let go, but I know I need to. After holding on a few seconds longer than necessary, I reluctantly pull my hand back.
"Hey. What"s up?" he says with a head jerk.
At his question, my head automatically turns down to my lap, which incidentally has something very up in it. My first instinct is to tell him my d.i.c.k is up, but Chris jabs me in the stomach before the words have the chance to come out.
"Don"t you dare, Andrew," Chris says, glaring at me.
Giving her a flirty grin, I fake innocence, when we both know d.a.m.n good and well nothing I was just thinking was innocent. "What? I haven"t done anything."
"You know what," she hisses at me.
Chuckling, I turn my attention to Jase, knowing it will be my new favorite thing to do: having my attention on Jase.
"How long are you going to be here in Jaded Hollow?" I ask, hoping his answer is going to be "forever."
"Not sure yet. Gonna check the place out first, and then I"ll decide," he responds, his voice sending shivers down my back.
I seriously need to check myself. I"m on the edge of my seat wanting to jerk him to me, and I know I can"t do that, which goes against everything that is me. I"m not used to holding my feelings or actions in. Everyone in town knows I"m the type of person who says what"s on his mind. I"m a fun-loving guy who likes to make people laugh. Normally, except with Jaxon, I never hide when I want something. To not give in to the urge to make my feelings about Jase known to him is killing me, but I promised Chris I would keep it to a minimum. What"s even worse is Jase"s reaction to me, which is nothing. No spark in his eye, no tightening of his body, no abnormal breathing, just nothing.
I want him to react to me. I want him to notice me. I want him to see me as a potential lover.
"Let me know if you need someone to show you around."
Another chin lift and a, "Will do," are the only reply I get.
I"m frustrated, so I turn to face the rest of the small group. "What are you all up to today?"
It"s Jaxon"s deep voice that answers. "Just showing Jase a few places. We"re headed over to Chris"s next to settle him in. He"ll be staying there until he decides if he wants to stay. Then headed down to the bar."
Chris lives in Bailey"s old place, which is right above Jaxon"s Pub. Bailey wasn"t there long before she and Jaxon got together, and when Chris moved here to be closer to her friend, she decided to take it over. It"s small and cramped, definitely not enough room for two people to live in. An idea forms in my head, and I turn back to Jase.
"Let me know if you decide to stay. I have an extra room at my place that"s empty." The idea of him in my s.p.a.ce gets my blood flowing and almost has my eyes rolling back in my head. I can"t help the needy look I know is written all over my face.
"Thanks. I"ll let you know."
I glance down at my watch and see that I need to leave or I"m going to be late. I hate leaving when I just met him, but what I need to do is important. It doesn"t just involve me, but others. Others that I can"t and won"t let down.
I get up from my stool. "I"ve got to go." To Chris and Bailey, I ask, "Will y"all be at the bar later?"
Please say yes, please say yes. s.h.i.t, I"m pathetic.
"Jaxon and I will be there. His mom"s gonna watch Amari for me so I can hang out," Bailey says.
"We"ll be there as well," Chris answers, wrapping her arm through Jase"s and leaning on him. "I want Jase to see where I work part-time and get the feel of the place since it"s a local hangout."
I barely contain myself from jumping up and down like a five-year-old at Christmas. I"m on shift tonight, along with Mia. Even if I wasn"t though, I"d still be there. I want to be wherever Jase is going to be. I want to get to know him and him me. I want him to see the real me, not the person standing in front of him, biting his tongue. To do that, he needs to be around me and my friends in a comfortable setting. Jaxon"s is the perfect place for that.
I look around for Maggie to pay for my meal and see she"s busy with a customer. I pull out my wallet and throw money on the counter, more than enough to pay for my breakfast and leave a tip. I turn back to Bailey and reach down to place a soft kiss against her lips. "I"ll see you all later."
I then lean over her shoulder to do the same with Amari, tickling her side in the process, causing her to giggle and kick her little legs. When I pull back, I glance at Jaxon and see the pierced eyebrow is raised. He"s waiting for my usual flirtatious move to try to get a kiss from him.
"Sorry buddy, not today," I tell him with a wink. He just rolls his eyes and shifts Amari around in his arms.
My lips tip up, and I turn to face Chris, who is still leaning on Jase. Leaning down, I kiss her lips as well. This may seem strange to some, but it"s just who I am. I"m very open about my feelings, and these two ladies have come to mean a lot to me. When I pull back from Chris, I look her straight in the eye and say, "Thank you." She smiles and nods.
I stand to my full height and take in Jase one more time before I have to leave. His brows are puckered and it looks like he"s concentrating on something important. His eyes shift from mine to Chris and then back.
"It was nice meeting you, Jase," I tell him with a s.e.xy smirk. To the others I say, "I"ll see you tonight at Jaxon"s."
After "good-byes" and "see you laters," I walk toward the door, forcing myself to not look back. It takes everything I have in me.
Jase is so much more than I expected. No, I still don"t really know him, but from what Chris has said about him he seems like a good guy. I"m really looking forward to getting to know him. I just hope I can calm my raging body enough to do so before I turn him off.
Jase.
f.u.c.k! s.h.i.t! Son of a b.i.t.c.h! Who in the h.e.l.l is that guy and where can I get one?
The ridiculous thought pops into my head, and I want to do a face palm. I"ve got too much s.h.i.t going on to be thinking like that. s.h.i.t that no one knows about. s.h.i.t that no one will know about if I can help it. That"s the reason I"m in this little town anyway, to get away from the f.u.c.ked-up mess back home. Between my parents and the other s.h.i.t going down, I had to leave. I missed my sister like crazy, so this seemed like the place I was going to be for a while.
I turn my head and watch the sweet a.s.s making its way through the door. I thank my f.u.c.king lucky stars I still had my gla.s.ses on when we first made our way over to him, because my eyes nearly bugged out of their sockets. The man is drop-dead gorgeous. Tall, dark tattooed skin, built, s.h.a.ggy brown hair, and eyes so black you could get lost in them. My jeans get tight at the memory of him. When I saw the flash of desire in his eyes, I nearly dropped to my knees.
Chris tugs on my arm, grabbing my attention away from the door. "Come on. Let"s grab a seat."
We make our way over to a freshly cleaned booth and take a seat; Chris and me on one side, Bailey, Amari, and Jaxon on the other.
I look across the booth at Bailey, who now has Amari on her lap. The last time I saw Bailey was a few years ago. The scar on her face makes my blood boil. We"ve never been very close. She and Chris have been friends since they were little, but with how Bailey"s parents were, she was rarely allowed at our house. I never knew of the abuse she endured as a child. By the time we all were older and Bailey ended up in another s.h.i.tty situation, I was off doing my own thing. Bailey made Chris promise not to tell anyone of the abuse she was enduring on a daily basis, and so Chris never came to me with her concerns. Had I known about it, I would have buried the b.a.s.t.a.r.d so far down his body would have never been found.
My eyes skip to Jaxon, and see complete adoration for the woman and child sitting next to him. He has his arm slung across the back of the booth, his hand playing with Bailey"s hair. The look in his eyes as he watches them shows everyone he would do anything to protect and love them. Jaxon is a scary-looking motherf.u.c.ker, and I feel sorry for anyone who messes with his family. I"m happy for Bailey. She deserves a bit of happiness in her life after what she"s gone through, and the love shining in her eyes says she"s found it.
Chris nudges my shoulder, and I look down at her. "It"s amazing, isn"t it?" she asks quietly, and looks at Bailey and Jaxon.
It really is amazing. Chris has updated me on everything that has happened, including what that sick f.u.c.k did to Bailey and Jaxon"s sister, Anna, after he followed Bailey to Jaded Hollow. For her to overcome everything is incredible.
I smile down at Chris. "Yeah, it is."