"Oh, don"t you know? Susanna Ivanovna"s pension.... She gets one. An awfully curious story, I can tell you! I"ll tell it you one of these days. Quite an affair, "pon my soul, a queer affair. But, I say, the governor, you won"t forget about the governor, please! His hide is thick, of course--German, and it"s had a Russian tanning too, still you can get through it. Only, mind my step-mother Elenorka"s nowhere about!
Dad"s afraid of her, and she wants to keep everything for her brats! But there, you know your way about! Good-bye!"
"Ugh, what a low beast that boy is!" cried Fustov, as soon as the door had slammed-to.
His face was burning, as though from the fire, and he turned away from me. I did not question him, and soon retired.
XII
All that day I spent in speculating about Fustov, about Susanna, and about her relations. I had a vague feeling of something like a family drama. As far as I could judge, my friend was not indifferent to Susanna. But she? Did she care for him? Why did she seem so unhappy? And altogether, what sort of creature was she? These questions were continually recurring to my mind. An obscure but strong conviction told me that it would be no use to apply to Fustov for the solution of them.
It ended in my setting off the next day alone to Mr. Ratsch"s house.
I felt all at once very uncomfortable and confused directly I found myself in the dark little pa.s.sage. "She won"t appear even, very likely,"
flashed into my mind. "I shall have to stop with the repulsive veteran and his cook of a wife.... And indeed, even if she does show herself, what of it? She won"t even take part in the conversation.... She was anything but warm in her manner to me the other day. Why ever did I come?" While I was making these reflections, the little page ran to announce my presence, and in the adjoining room, after two or three wondering "Who is it? Who, do you say?" I heard the heavy shuffling of slippers, the folding-door was slightly opened, and in the crack between its two halves was thrust the face of Ivan Demianitch, an unkempt and grim-looking face. It stared at me and its expression did not immediately change.... Evidently, Mr. Ratsch did not at once recognise me; but suddenly his cheeks grew rounder, his eyes narrower, and from his opening mouth, there burst, together with a guffaw, the exclamation: "Ah! my dear sir! Is it you? Pray walk in!"
I followed him all the more unwillingly, because it seemed to me that this affable, good-humoured Mr. Ratsch was inwardly wishing me at the devil. There was nothing to be done, however. He led me into the drawing-room, and in the drawing-room who should be sitting but Susanna, bending over an account-book? She glanced at me with her melancholy eyes, and very slightly bit the finger-nails of her left hand.... It was a habit of hers, I noticed, a habit peculiar to nervous people. There was no one else in the room.
"You see, sir," began Mr. Ratsch, dealing himself a smack on the haunch, "what you"ve found Susanna Ivanovna and me busy upon: we"re at our accounts. My spouse has no great head for arithmetic, and I, I must own, try to spare my eyes. I can"t read without spectacles, what am I to do?
Let the young people exert themselves, ha-ha! That"s the proper thing.
But there"s no need of haste.... More haste, worse speed in catching fleas, he-he!"
Susanna closed the book, and was about to leave the room.
"Wait a bit, wait a bit," began Mr. Ratsch. "It"s no great matter if you"re not in your best dress...." (Susanna was wearing a very old, almost childish, frock with short sleeves.) "Our dear guest is not a stickler for ceremony, and I should like just to clear up last week....
You don"t mind?"--he addressed me. "We needn"t stand on ceremony with you, eh?"
"Please don"t put yourself out on my account!" I cried.
"To be sure, my good friend. As you"re aware, the late Tsar Alexey Nikolavitch Romanoff used to say, "Time is for business, but a minute for recreation!" We"ll devote one minute only to that same business...
ha-ha! What about that thirteen roubles and thirty kopecks?" he added in a low voice, turning his back on me.
"Viktor took it from Eleonora Karpovna; he said that it was with your leave," Susanna replied, also in a low voice.
"He said... he said... my leave..." growled Ivan Demianitch. "I"m on the spot myself, I fancy. Might be asked. And who"s had that seventeen roubles?"
"The upholsterer."
"Oh... the upholsterer. What"s that for?" "His bill."
"His bill. Show me!" He pulled the book away from Susanna, and planting a pair of round spectacles with silver rims on his nose, he began pa.s.sing his finger along the lines. "The upholsterer,.. the upholsterer... You"d chuck all the money out of doors! Nothing pleases you better!... Wie die Croaten! A bill indeed! But, after all," he added aloud, and he turned round facing me again, and pulled the spectacles off his nose, "why do this now? I can go into these wretched details later. Susanna Ivanovna, be so good as to put away that account-book, and come back to us and enchant our kind guest"s ears with your musical accomplishments, to wit, playing on the pianoforte... Eh?"
Susanna turned away her head.
"I should be very happy," I hastily observed; "it would be a great pleasure for me to hear Susanna Ivanovna play. But I would not for anything in the world be a trouble..."
"Trouble, indeed, what nonsense! Now then, Susanna Ivanovna, eins, zwei, drei!"
Susanna made no response, and went out.
XIII
I had not expected her to come back; but she quickly reappeared. She had not even changed her dress, and sitting down in a corner, she looked twice intently at me. Whether it was that she was conscious in my manner to her of the involuntary respect, inexplicable to myself, which, more than curiosity, more even than sympathy, she aroused in me, or whether she was in a softened frame of mind that day, any way, she suddenly went to the piano, and laying her hand irresolutely on the keys, and turning her head a little over her shoulder towards me, she asked what I would like her to play. Before I had time to answer she had seated herself, taken up some music, hurriedly opened it, and begun to play. I loved music from childhood, but at that time I had but little comprehension of it, and very slight knowledge of the works of the great masters, and if Mr. Ratsch had not grumbled with some dissatisfaction, "Aha! wieder dieser Beethoven!" I should not have guessed what Susanna had chosen. It was, as I found out afterwards, the celebrated sonata in F minor, opus 57. Susanna"s playing impressed me more than I can say; I had not expected such force, such fire, such bold execution. At the very first bars of the intensely pa.s.sionate allegro, the beginning of the sonata, I felt that numbness, that chill and sweet terror of ecstasy, which instantaneously enwrap the soul when beauty bursts with sudden flight upon it. I did not stir a limb till the very end. I kept, wanting--and not daring--to sigh. I was sitting behind Susanna; I could not see her face; I saw only from time to time her long dark hair tossed up and down on her shoulders, her figure swaying impulsively, and her delicate arms and bare elbows swiftly, and rather angularly, moving. The last notes died away. I sighed at last. Susanna still sat before the piano.
"Ja, ja," observed Mr. Ratsch, who had also, however, listened with attention; "romantische Musik! That"s all the fashion nowadays. Only, why not play correctly? Eh? Put your finger on two notes at once--what"s that for? Eh? To be sure, all we care for is to go quickly, quickly!
Turns it out hotter, eh? Hot pancakes!" he bawled like a street seller.
Susanna turned slightly towards Mr. Ratsch. I caught sight of her face in profile. The delicate eyebrow rose high above the downcast eyelid, an unsteady flush overspread the cheek, the little ear was red under the lock pushed behind it.
"I have heard all the best performers with my own ears," pursued Mr.
Ratsch, suddenly frowning, "and compared with the late Field they were all--tfoo! nil! zero!! Das war ein Kerl! Und ein so reines Spiel! And his own compositions the finest things! But all those now "tloo-too-too," and "tra-ta-ta," are written, I suppose, more for beginners. Da braucht man keine Delicatesse! Bang the keys anyhow... no matter! It"ll turn out some how! Janitscharen Musik! Pugh!" (Ivan Demianitch wiped his forehead with his handkerchief.) "But I don"t say that for you, Susanna Ivanovna; you played well, and oughtn"t to be hurt by my remarks."
"Every one has his own taste," Susanna said in a low voice, and her lips were trembling; "but your remarks, Ivan Demianitch, you know, cannot hurt me."
"Oh! of course not! Only don"t you imagine"--Mr. Ratsch turned to me--"don"t you imagine, my young friend, that that comes from our excessive good-nature and meekness of spirit; it"s simply that we fancy ourselves so highly exalted that--oo-oo!--we can"t keep our cap on our head, as the Russian proverb says, and, of course, no criticism can touch us. The conceit, my dear sir, the conceit!"
I listened in surprise to Mr. Ratsch. Spite, the bitterest spite, seemed as it were boiling over in every word he uttered.... And long it must have been rankling! It choked him. He tried to conclude his tirade with his usual laugh, and fell into a husky, broken cough instead. Susanna did not let drop a syllable in reply to him, only she shook her head, raised her face, and clasping her elbows with her hands, stared straight at him. In the depths of her fixed, wide-open eyes the hatred of long years lay smouldering with dim, unquenchable fire. I felt ill at ease.
"You belong to two different musical generations," I began, with an effort at lightness, wishing by this lightness to suggest that I noticed nothing, "and so it is not surprising that you do not agree in your opinions.... But, Ivan Demianitch, you must allow me to take rather...
the side of the younger generation. I"m an outsider, of course; but I must confess nothing in music has ever made such an impression on me as the... as what Susanna Ivanovna has just played us."
Ratsch pounced at once upon me.
"And what makes you suppose," he roared, still purple from the fit of coughing, "that we want to enlist you on our side? We don"t want that at all! Freedom for the free, salvation for the saved! But as to the two generations, that"s right enough; we old folks find it hard to get on with you young people, very hard! Our ideas don"t agree in anything: neither in art, nor in life, nor even in morals; do they, Susanna Ivanovna?"
Susanna smiled a contemptuous smile.
"Especially in regard to morals, as you say, our ideas do not agree, and cannot agree," she responded, and something menacing seemed to flit over her brows, while her lips were faintly trembling as before.
"Of course! of course!" Ratsch broke in, "I"m not a philosopher! I"m not capable of... rising so superior! I"m a plain man, swayed by prejudices--oh yes!"
Susanna smiled again.
"I think, Ivan Demianitch, you too have sometimes been able to place yourself above what are called prejudices."
"Wie so? How so, I mean? I don"t know what you mean."
"You don"t know what I mean? Your memory"s so bad!"
Mr. Ratsch seemed utterly taken aback.
"I... I..." he repeated, "I..."
"Yes, you, Mr. Ratsch."
There followed a brief silence.