""Dress up one of Dycer"s fellows like you; let him go by the Lord-Lieutenant prancing and rearing, and then you yourself can appear on the ground, all splashed and spurred, half an hour after."
""No," says my grandfather, "I "ll go myself."
"For so it is, there "s no denying, when a man has got ambition in his heart it puts pluck there. Well, eleven o"clock came, and the whole of Abbey Street was on foot to see my grandfather; there was n"t a window had n"t five or six faces in it, and every blackguard in the town was there to see him go off, just as if it was a show.
""Bad luck to them," says my grandfather; "I wish they had brought the horse round to the stable-yard, and let me get up in peace."
"And he was right there,--for the stirrup, when my grandfather stood beside the horse, was exactly even with his chin; but somehow, with the help of the two clerks and the book-keeper and the office stool, he got up on his back with as merry a cheer as ever rung out to welcome him, while a dirty blackguard, with two old pocket-handkerchiefs for a pair of breeches, shouted out, "Old Dempsey"s going to get an appet.i.te for the oysters!"
"Considering everything, 176 behaved very well; he did n"t plunge, and he did n"t kick, and my grandfather said, "Providence was kind enough not to let him rear!" but somehow he wouldn"t go straight but sideways, and kept lashing his long tail on my grandfather"s legs and sometimes round his body, in a way that terrified him greatly, till he became used to it.
""Well, if riding be a pleasure," says my grandfather, "people must be made different from me."
"For, saving your favor, ma"am, he was as raw as a griskin, and there was n"t a bit of him the size of a half-crown he could sit on without a cry-out; and no other pace would the beast go but this little jig-jig, from side to side, while he was tossing his head and flinging his mane about, just as if to say, "Could n"t I pitch you sky-high if I liked?
Could n"t I make a Congreve-rocket of you, Dodd and Dempsey?"
"When he got on the "Fifteen Acres," it was only the position he found himself in that destroyed the grandeur of the scene; for there were fifty thousand people a.s.sembled at least, and there was a line of infantry of two miles long, and the artillery was drawn up at one end, and the cavalry stood beyond them, stretching away towards Knockmaroon.
"My grandfather was now getting accustomed to his sufferings, and he felt that, if 176 did no more, with G.o.d"s help he could bear it for one day; and so he rode on quietly outside the crowd, attracting, of course, a fair share of observation, for he wasn"t always in the saddle, but sometimes a little behind or before it. Well, at last there came a cloud of dust, rising at the far end of the field, and it got thicker and thicker, and then it broke, and there were white plumes dancing, and gold glittering, and horses all shaking their gorgeous trappings, for it was the staff was galloping up, and then there burst out a great cheer, so loud that nothing seemed possible to be louder, until bang--bang--bang, eighteen large guns went thundering together, and the whole line of infantry let off a clattering volley, till you "d think the earth was crashing open.
""Devil"s luck to ye all! couldn"t you be quiet a little longer?" says D. and D., for he was trying to get an easy posture to sit in; but just at this moment 176 p.r.i.c.ked up his ears, made three bounds in the air, as if something lifted him up, shook his head like a fish, and away he went: wasn"t it wonderful that my grandfather kept his seat? He remembers, he says, that at each bound he was a yard over his back; but as he was a heavy man, and kept his legs open, he had the luck to come down in the same place, and a sore place it must have been! for he let a screech out of him each time that would have pierced the heart of a stone. He knew very little more what happened, except that he was galloping away somewhere, until at last he found himself in a crowd of people, half dead with fatigue and fright, and the horse thick with foam.
""Where am I?" says my grandfather.
""You "re in Lucan, sir," says a man.
""And where "s the review?" says my grandfather.
""Five miles behind you, sir."
""Blessed Heaven!" says he; "and where "s the Duke?"
""G.o.d knows," said the man, giving a wink to the crowd, for they thought he was mad.
""Won"t you get off and take some refreshment?" says the man, for he was the owner of a little public.
""Get off!" says my grandfather; "it"s easy talking! I found it hard enough to get on. Bring me a pint of porter where I am." And so he drained off the liquor, and he wiped his face, and he turned the beast"s head once more towards town.
"When my grandfather reached the Park again, he was, as you may well believe, a tired and a weary man; and, indeed, for that matter, the beast did n"t seem much fresher than himself, for he lashed his sides more rarely, and he condescended to go straight, and he didn"t carry his head higher than his rider"s. At last they wound their way up through the fir copse at the end of the field, and caught sight of the review, and, to be sure, if poor D. and D. left the ground before under a grand salute of artillery and small arms, another of the same kind welcomed him back again. It was an honor he "d have been right glad to have dispensed with, for when 176 heard it, he looked about him to see which way he "d take, gave a loud neigh, and, with a shake that my grandfather said he "d never forget, he plunged forward, and went straight at the thick of the crowd; it must have been a cruel sight to have seen the people running for their lives. The soldiers that kept the line laughed heartily at the mob; but they hadn"t the joke long to themselves, for my grandfather went slap at them into the middle of the field; and he did that day what I hear has been very seldom done by cavalry,--he broke a square of the Seventy-ninth Highlanders, and scattered them over the field.
[Ill.u.s.tration: 061]
In truth, the beast must have been the devil himself; for wherever he saw most people, it was there he always went. There were at this time three heavy dragoons and four of the horse-police, with drawn swords, in pursuit of my grandfather; and if he were the enemy of the human race, the cries of the mult.i.tude could not have been louder, as one universal shout arose of "Cut him down! Cleave him in two!" And, do you know, he said, afterwards, he "d have taken it as a mercy of Providence if they had. Well, my dear, when he had broke through the Highlanders, scattered the mob, dispersed the band, and left a hole in the big drum you could have put your head through, 176 made for the staff, who, I may remark, were all this time enjoying the confusion immensely. When, however, they saw my grandfather heading towards them, there was a general cry of "Here he comes! here he comes! Take care, your Grace!" And there arose among the group around the Duke a scene of plunging, kicking, and rearing, in the midst of which in dashed my grandfather. Down went an aide-de-camp on one side; 176 plunged, and off went the town-major at the other; while a stroke of a sabre, kindly intended for my grandfather"s skull, came down on the horse"s back and made him give plunge the third, which shot his rider out of the saddle, and sent him flying through the air like a sh.e.l.l, till he alighted under the leaders of a carriage where the d.u.c.h.ess and the Ladies of Honor were seated.
"Twenty people jumped from their horses now to finish him; if they were bunting a rat, they could not have been more venomous.
""Stop! stop!" said the Duke; "he"s a capital fellow, don"t hurt him.
Who are you, my brave little man? You ride like Chifney for the Derby."
""G.o.d knows who I am!" says my grandfather, creeping out, and wiping his face. "I was Dodd and Dempsey when I left home this morning; but I "m bewitched, devil a lie in it."
""Dempsey, my Lord Duke," said M"Claverty, coming up at the moment.
"Don"t you know him?" And he whispered a few words in his Grace"s ear.
""Oh, yes, to be sure," said the Viceroy. "They tell me you have a capital pack of hounds, Dempsey. What do you hunt?"
""Horse, foot, and dragoons, my Lord," said my grandfather; and, to be sure, there was a jolly roar of laughter after the words, for poor D.
and D. was just telling his mind, without meaning anything more.
""Well, then," said the Duke, "if you "ve always as good sport as to-day, you "ve capital fun of it."
""Oh, delightful, indeed!" said my grandfather; "never enjoyed myself more in my life."
""Where "s his horse?" said his Grace.
""He jumped down into the sand-quarry and broke his neck, my Lord Duke."
""The heavens be praised!" said my grandfather; "if it"s true, I am as glad as if I got fifty pounds."
"The trumpets now sounded for the cavalry to march past, and the Duke was about to move away, when M"Claverty again whispered something in his ear.
""Very true," said he; "well thought of. I say, Dempsey, I "ll go over some of these mornings and have a run with your hounds."
"My grandfather rubbed his eyes and looked up, but all he saw was about twenty staff-officers with their hats off; for every man of them saluted my father as they pa.s.sed, and the crowd made way for him with as much respect as if it was the Duke himself. He soon got a car to bring him home, and notwithstanding all his sufferings that day, and the great escape he had of his life, there wasn"t as proud a man in Dublin as himself.
""He"s coming to hunt with my hounds!" said he; ""t is n"t to take an oyster and a gla.s.s of wine, and be off again!--no, he"s coming down to spend the whole day with me."
"The thought was ecstasy; it only had one drawback. Dodd and Dempsey"s house had never kept hounds. Well, ma"am, I needn"t detain you long about what happened; it"s enough if I say that in less than six weeks my grandfather had bought up Lord Tyrawley"s pack, and his hunting-box and horses, and I believe his grooms; and though he never ventured on the back of a beast himself, he did nothing from morning to night but listen and talk about hunting, and try to get the names of the dogs by heart, and practise to cry "Tally-ho!" and "Stole away!" and "Ho-ith! ho-ith!"
with which, indeed, he used to start out of his sleep at night, so full he was of the sport. From the 1st of September he never had a red coat off his back. "Pon my conscience, I believe he went to bed in his spurs, for he did n"t know what moment the Duke might be on him, and that"s the way the time went on till spring; but not a sign of his Grace, not a word, not a hint that he ever thought more of his promise! Well, one morning my grandfather was walking very sorrowfully down near the Curragh, where his hunting-lodge was, when he saw them roping-in the course for the races, and he heard the men talking of the magnificent cup the Duke was to give for the winner of the three-year-old stakes, and the thought flashed on him, "I"ll bring myself to his memory that way." And what does he do, but he goes back to the house and tells his trainer to go over to the racing-stables, and buy, not one, nor two, but the three best horses that were entered for the race. Well, ma"am, their engagements were very heavy, and he had to take them all on himself, and it cost him a sight of money. It happened that this time he was on the right scent, for down comes M"Claverty the same day with orders from the Duke to take the odds, right and left, on one of the three, a little mare called Let-Me-Alone-Before-the-People; she was one of his own breeding, and he had a conceit out of her. Well, M"Claverty laid on the money here and there, till he stood what between the Duke"s bets and all the officers of the staff and his own the heaviest winner or loser on that race.
""She"s Martin"s mare, is n"t she?" said M"Claverty.
""No, sir, she was bought this morning by Mr. Dempsey, of Tear Fox Lodge."
""The devil she is," said M"Claverty; and he jumped on his horse, and he cantered over to the Lodge.
""Mr. Dempsey at home?" says he.
""Yes, sir."
""Give him this card, and say, I beg the favor of seeing him for a few moments."
"The man went off, and came back in a few minutes, with the answer, "Mr.
Dempsey is very sorry, but he "s engaged."
""Oh, oh! that"s it!" says M"Claverty to himself; "I see how the wind blows. I say, my man, tell him I "ve a message from his Grace the Lord-Lieutenant."
"Well, the answer came for the captain to send the message in, for my grandfather could n"t come out.