Edith was pouring the after-dinner coffee. It was the first time they had dined together. On the other days she had made it a point to be back in London before nightfall; but she had so far yielded to him now as to be willing to wait for a later train.
"What sort of reasons?" he urged.
"Oh, I don"t know," she said again, pensively, dropping a lump of sugar into his coffee-cup. She added, while pa.s.sing the cup to him: "It isn"t so easy for a woman to be--to be drifting about--especially with two children."
"But why should you have drifted about, when you knew that at a sign from you--?"
She went on as if he hadn"t spoken. "And when I saw you had dismantled the house and other people were living in it--I couldn"t help seeing that, you know, in driving by--"
"But, good G.o.d, Edith, you wouldn"t have come back to me?"
She stirred her own coffee slowly. "N-no."
"Does that mean no or yes?"
"Oh, it means no. That is"--she reflected long--"if I _had_ gone back to you I should have been sorry."
"You would have considered it a weakness--a surrender--"
She nodded. "Something like that."
"And you really had stopped--caring anything about me?"
"It wasn"t that so much as--so much as that I couldn"t get over my resentment." She seemed to have found the explanatory word. "That was it," she continued, with more decision. "That"s what I felt: resentment--a terrible resentment. Whatever compromise I thought of, that resentment against you for--for doing what you did--blocked the way. If I"d gone back I should have taken it with me."
"But you don"t seem to suffer from it now. Or am I wrong?"
She answered promptly: "No; you"re right. That"s the strange part of it.
After I married--it left me. It was as if old scores were wiped out.
That isn"t precisely what I felt," she hastened to add; "and yet, it was something _like_ that."
"You"d got even."
She shook her head doubtfully. "N-no. I don"t mean that. But the past seemed to be dissolved--not to exist for me any more."
"H"m! Not to exist for you any more!"
"I said _seemed_. That"s what bewildered me--from the beginning: things I thought I felt--or thought I didn"t feel--for a while--only to find later that it wasn"t--wasn"t _so_." She went on with difficulty. "For instance--that day--that day at the Park--I thought that everything was killed within me. But it wasn"t. It came alive again."
"But not so much alive that you wanted to come back to me."
"Alive--in a different way."
"What sort of different way?"
Her eyes became appealing. "Oh, what"s the good of talking of it now?"
"Because you haven"t told me what I asked--why you married him--why you married any one."
She turned the query against himself: "Why did _you_?"
"I didn"t till after you did. I wouldn"t have done it then if--if I hadn"t been so--well, to put it plainly, so d.a.m.ned lonely."
She gave him one of the smiles that stabbed him. "Well, then? Doesn"t that answer your question?"
He thought it did, and for a while they listened to the blackbird"s song in silence. It was their last talk. They parted at the door of the Ritz with the intention of spending the next day in Windsor Forest--or some other romantic wood; but within a few minutes she had telephoned him that the summons had arrived. Next morning she left for Paris.
And so he went to Berne. He hadn"t meant to go there when he said good-by to her at Victoria. He had no intention of following her or putting himself in her way. He had purposely asked nothing of her plans, or so much as the date of her return to America. He had not precisely made up his mind that they were parting for good, but he was too stunned to forecast the future. He was stunned and sickened. He was stunned and sickened and disconsolate to a degree beyond anything he had thought possible in life. If it hadn"t been for the bit of business that had brought him to London he would hardly have had courage enough to get through the days.
But, the business coming to an end, he was stranded. There was nothing to do but go back to the wife and child whose existence he never remembered except with a pang of self-reproach. He meant to go back to them--but not yet. It was too soon. Edith was too much with him. The fact that her physical presence was withdrawn made her spiritually the more pervasive. The afterglow of their days together couldn"t fade otherwise than slowly, like light when the sun goes down.
So, when he should have been going to New York, he went to Berne. It was not really in the hope of being face to face with her again or of having speech with her. Even if she came there the dread presence would come with her and keep them apart. But Berne was a little place, a quiet place, restful, soothing, a haunt of ancient peace. It had struck him, on former visits there, that on this spot ignored by the tourist, who changes trains subterraneously, consecrated to old st.u.r.diness and modern wisdom, serenely heedless of the blatant and the up-to-date, a bruised spirit might heal itself in a seclusion cheered by green hills and distant snowy ranges. It was such solitude that, in the first place, he sought now. If in addition he could see the shadow of Edith pa.s.sing by--no more!--he felt that he would soon be inwardly strong again.
At Berne there is a hotel known chiefly to wise travelers--a hotel of old wines, old silver, old traditions, handed down from father to son, and from the son to the son"s son. Standing on the edge of the bluff which the city crowns, it dominates from its windows and terraces the valley of the Aar. Swift and unruffled, the river glides through the meadows like a sinuous ice-green serpent. Beyond the river and behind the pastoral slopes of the Gurten hangs a curtain of mist, which lifts at times to display the line of the Bernese Oberland, from the Wetterhorn to the Bettfluh.
It is a hotel with which the learned people who sit in international conferences and settle difficult questions are familiar. It was sheltering a conference when Chip Walker arrived. Each of the nations had appointed three distinguished men to consult with three distinguished men from each of the other nations on possible modifications in the rules of the Postal Union when the use of aeroplanes became general in that service. The distinguished men met officially in a great room of the Bundespalast; but unofficially they could be seen strolling along the arcaded medieval streets, or feeding the civic bears with carrots at the bear-pit, or reading or smoking or sipping coffee and liqueurs in the fine semicircular hall of the hotel.
They were French, or Austrian, or Russian, or German, or English, or Danish, or Dutch, as the case might be. There were also some Americans.
The great national types were more or less easy to discern--except the Americans. That is, Chip Walker could see no one whom he could recognize offhand as a fellow-countryman. Three gentlemanly, jovial Englishmen were easily made out, because, in Walker"s phrase, they "flocked by themselves" and in the intervals of sitting in the Bundespalast complained that Berne had no golf-links. They also dressed for dinner and dined in the restaurant. A few others did the same. But the majority of the distinguished men preferred to spend the evening in the costumes they had worn all day, and, with their wives--there were eight or ten dumpy, dowdy, smiling little wives--were content with the _table d"hote_. Indeed, the popularity of the _table d"hote_ sifted the simple, scholarly professors of Gottingen, Freiburg, or Geneva from the representatives of the larger and more sophisticated social world, leaving the latter to eat in the restaurant, _a la carte_.
In this way Chip came to observe a man of some distinction who took his meals at a small table alone and kept to himself. He was a man who would have been noticeable anywhere, if it were for no more than the dignified gravity of his manner and the correctness of his dress. Not only did he wear what was impeccably the right thing for the right occasion, but his movements were of the sedate precision that never displaces a b.u.t.ton. As straight and slim and erect as a guardsman, he was nevertheless stamped all over as a civilian. From the lines in his gray, clean-shaven face of regular profile, and the silvery touches in his hair, Chip judged him to be fifty years old. He puzzled the a.n.a.lyst of nationalities--though, as Chip put it to himself, it was clear he must belong to one of the peoples who were chic. He was, therefore, either English or French or Russian or Austrian or American. There was a bare chance of his being a Dane or a Swede. When he spoke to a waiter or a pa.s.sing acquaintance, it was in so low a tone that Walker couldn"t detect the language he used. All one could affirm from distant and superficial observation was that he was Somebody--Somebody of position, experience, and judgment--Somebody to respect.
That, perhaps, was the secret of Walker"s curiosity--that he respected him. He would have liked to talk to him--not precisely to ask his advice, but to lay before him some of the difficulties that were inchoate in his soul. He had an idea that this man with the grave, suffering face--yes, there was suffering in his face, as one could see on closer inspection!--would understand them.
He came to the conclusion that he was a Russian, though he had an early opportunity to find out. As he stood one day by the concierge"s desk the stranger entered, paused, spoke a few words inaudible to Walker, and pa.s.sed on. It was a simple matter to ask his name of the one man who knew every name in the hotel, and he was on the point of doing so. He had already begun: "Voulez vous bien me dire--?" when he stopped. On the whole he preferred his own speculations. In the long, idle hours they gave him something to think of that took his mind from dwelling on his own entangled affairs.
He counted, too, on the hazards of hotel life throwing them one day together. He was already on speaking or nodding terms with most of the distinguished men whom he could address in a common language. This had come about by the simple means of propinquity on the terrace or in the semicircular hall. He soon saw, however, that no diligence in frequenting these places of reunion would help him with the stately stranger whose interest he desired to win. The gentleman took the air elsewhere.
For contiguous to the terrace of the hotel is a little public park called the Kleine Schanze--haunt of well-behaved Bernese children, of motherly Bernese housewives supplied with knitting and the gossip of the town, of Bernese patriarchs in search of gentle exercise and sunshine.
This little park possesses a music-pavilion, a duck-pond, a monument to the Postal Union of 1876, many pretty pathways, and an incomparable promenade. The incomparable promenade has also an incomparable view on those days when the Spirit of the Alps permits it to be visible.
Two such days at least there were during that month of June. Glancing casually over his left shoulder as he marched one afternoon with head bent and back turned toward the east, Chip saw that which a few minutes before had been but the misty edge of the sky transformed into a range of ineffable white peaks. The unexpectedness with which the glistering spectacle appeared made his heart leap. It was like a celestial vision--like a view of the ramparts of the Heavenly City. He clutched the stone top of the bal.u.s.trade beside which he stood, seeking terms with which to make the moment indelible in his memory. Nothing came to him but a few broken, obvious words--sublime!--inviolate!--eternal! and such like.
What he chiefly felt was his inadequacy for even gazing on the sight, much less for recording it, when he became aware that in the crowding of people to the edge of the terrace the stranger was standing near him. It was an opportunity not to be missed.
"ca, c"est merveilleux, n"est-ce pas, monsieur?"
The words were ba.n.a.l, but they would serve to break the ice.
"Yes; and it becomes more marvelous the oftener it appears. I"ve never seen it more beautiful than to-day; but perhaps that"s because I"ve seen it so many times."
Chip was disappointed to be answered in English, and especially in the English of an American. It brought the man too near for confidence. They might easily find themselves involved in a host of common acquaintances, a fact that would preclude intimate talk. Had he been a Russian the remoteness of each from the other"s world would have made the exchange of secrets--perhaps of secret griefs--a possibility. Not so with a man whom one might meet the next time one entered a club in New York. Such a man might even be.... But he dismissed that alarming thought as out of the question. Edith wasn"t at Berne. If she had been he would have seen her. He would not inquire at the hotel, nor at any other hotel; but he knew that in so small a town he must have had a glimpse of her somewhere. While it was conceivable that her husband might have come to Berne leaving her elsewhere, this was not the sort of man she would have married. The type to appeal to her would be something like his own--of course!
Nevertheless, as he had begun the conversation, he felt that in courtesy he must go on with it. He did so by pointing with his stick to what he took to be the highest summit of the range, and saying: "I suppose that"s the Jungfrau."
The stranger moved nearer him. "No, you"re too far to the west. That"s the Breithorn. There"s the Jungfrau"--he, too, pointed with his stick--"sentineled by the Eiger and the Monch."
He went on to indicate the Wetterhorn, the Schreckhorn, the Blumlisalp, the Finsteraarhorn, and the Ebnefluh. They were like a row of shining spiritual presences manifesting themselves to an unbelieving world.