A copy of the letter is appended:--
Sept. 15th, 1835.
MY DEAR DUKE,--As you only acknowledge in yours of the 13th, two letters, I beg to say there were addressed to you by yesterday, three; One, written on Thursday, another on Friday and the last on Sat.u.r.day. And I take this opportunity of making two enquiries respecting which my mind is not at all satisfied.
The first is; Why I am to receive a change of style in the appearance of your letters with regard to the Seal thereof? and the next, _called forth thereby_; _Why_ you _ever_ ceased to sign your _Name_ at the conclusion of your letters? If either of these changes sprang from disrespect or want of confidence in my integrity, confidence, Christianity and friendship, I shall without hesitation or delay return Your Grace every letter I have in my possession, as in _that_ case they will cease to have any value in _my_ estimation. I will also beg to decline all further intercourse, knowing that the sincerity and purity of my friendship merits both consideration and respect.
You will perhaps wonder at my noticing your omission with regard to Signature after the receipt of so many letters. I should not have done so, however incomprehensible the same may have been and _was_ to me, had not _this additional_ circ.u.mstance tended to _strengthen_ a momentary feeling experienced when your first letter signed W. reached me. But this I overcame, fancying you were in the _habit_ of doing so to all your correspondents of any and every rank, and imagining you superior to the _capability_ of taking advantage of circ.u.mstances. If I am mistaken with regard to this being a _general habit_, I am _justified_ in asking--Why such an unwarrantable liberty was taken with me? I a.s.sure you that however great my affection may be, it is not of a nature to submit to ANY feeling that is not accompanied with the _deepest respect_ as well as esteem, nor could the latter be either durable or _acceptable_ under OTHER circ.u.mstances.
Waiting your reply before I can decide what further line of conduct to pursue, praying in the mean time to be directed BY HIM Who knows _all_ the _secret_, hidden motives of the human heart without exception, I inscribe myself,
Your sincere Christian friend,
A. J.
P.S. Since writing the above, my antipathy to the omission of _either_ your NAME OR seal is so _increased_ that I beg to decline receiving _any_ letter which does not bring with it _these_ marks of DUE respect.
Not satisfied with sending off this letter, Miss J. followed it with another no less severe. In her Diary she describes the feelings that swayed her while she awaited a reply to her missives:
"_September 16th--Morning._ I have risen this morning (my first in this place--Hampstead--) strong in The Lord and in the power of His might. I am prepared to meet whatever HE may see fit, casting my burthen wholly on him and desirous of nothing in comparison with His honor and glory. O may He be magnified powerfully both in my life and death, and may every period of my remaining days be dedicated more devotedly unto Him than any hitherto spent; "growing up in Him as a tree planted by the waterside" bringing forth fruit plentifully, knowing that "it is written" "He that abideth in ME and I in him the same bringeth forth much fruit,"--Be with me graciously and mightily when I hear from the Duke today--if I do--and especially tomorrow when the reply comes to that sent off yesterday, strengthening me "in the inner man" to treat it as Thou wouldst have me do in every respect, having no will of my own and loving Thine above all things. Thou knowest, O Gracious G.o.d, what is in the Duke"s heart, and why he has recourse to the ways which have occasioned my displeasure. Therefore I give him up into Thy Hands to deal with accordingly, beseeching Thee to have mercy on his precious Soul, bringing it from darkness to light and from the power of Satan unto Thyself for Christ"s sake!
"_September 16th 1835.--Evening._ The whole of this day has been marked with such divine strength from Him Who causes me to feel the force of this pa.s.sage of Holy Writ "When I am weak then am I strong," that it is impossible to be sufficiently thankful. No letter has arrived from the Duke. However I suppose tomorrow will bring with it the antic.i.p.ated answer. O may I be strengthened additionally to bear it if unkind! and prove myself ready to pluck out a right eye or cut off a right arm for Christ"s sake! which we may be understood to do when we resign those dearest upon earth at His command.
"_Friday September 18th 1835._ It is now between 11 and 12 o"clock and I am sitting at my pretty window with it open, waiting to know whether the Lord sees fit to allow me to receive a letter today from the Duke in reply to my two last which have received no answers yet. O may I be strengthened "in the inner man" to receive whatever is agreeable to the will of G.o.d, as His Child, dependent on Him for all things!
"The paragraph noticed in the paper of yesterday was marked with that presumption which is ever more or less perceivable in "the natural man," who seems to act without any reference to the will of G.o.d whatever, declaring "I will do this and that," instead of remembering that their lives are in His Hands and that He can s.n.a.t.c.h them away at any moment. To see the Duke thus presumptuously reckoning on several weeks to come proves how little what I have written on that subject is alluded to, showing me still further the inefficacy of all man"s endeavors until accompanied with the mighty power of G.o.d to the soul. The time I trust is at hand for this rebellious one when he will doubtlessly exclaim "Thy mercies are infinite and Thy ways past finding out," also "Lord, what is man that Thou art mindful of him? or the son of man that Thou visitest him?""
The Duke"s replies to both Miss J."s effusions followed one another in rapid succession:--
STRATHFIELDSAYE, Sept. 17, 1835.
MY DEAR MISS J.,--I always understood that the important parts of a Letter were its Contents. I never much considered the Signature; provided I knew the handwriting; or the Seal provided it effectually closed the Letter.
When I write to a Person with whom I am intimate, who knows my handwriting I generally sign my Initials. I don"t always seal my own Letters; they are sometimes sealed by a Secretary, oftener by myself.
In any Case as there are generally very many to be sealed; and the Seal frequently becomes heated, it is necessary to change it; and by accident I may have sealed a Letter to you with a blank Seal. But it is very extraordinary if it is so, as I don"t believe I have such a thing! You will find this Letter however signed and sealed in what you deem the most respectful manner.
And if I should write to you any more; I will take care that they shall be properly signed and sealed to your Satisfaction.
I am very glad to learn that you intend to send back all the letters I ever wrote to you. I told you heretofore that I thought you had better burn them all. But if you think proper to send them in a parcel to my House; I will save you the trouble of committing them to the Flames.
Believe me Ever Yours most sincerely
WELLINGTON.
I believe that the letter with the blank seal and signed with my Initials was sent off last Sunday night from Hartford Bridge and was franked by me; I hope that this was not deemed disrespectful.
STRATHFIELDSAYE, Sept. 18, 1835.
The Duke of Wellington presents his Compliments to Miss J. The Duke wrote an answer to Miss J. as soon as he received her Letter complaining of Disrespect in His having been in the habit of signing the Initials of His Name to the Letters which he had written to her; and in having sealed a letter addressed to her and franked by the Duke, with a plain seal.
If Miss J. had waited till she would receive the answer to a letter which she wrote on Tuesday she might have been satisfied with the reasons of the Duke for the Marks of Disrespect of which Miss J. complained.
The Duke has to add that since his return here, he has found upon His Table, a plain seal which it is probable was used by accident. He apologizes for having used it. At the same time he a.s.sures Miss J. that he could not have intended to be disrespectful.
The Duke requests that Miss J. will be so kind as to have a parcel made of the Letters from the Duke; that she will direct it to Him in Piccadilly; and have it booked at Hampstead and sent by any Coach to London.
Miss J. resolved to lose no time in returning the Duke"s letters, and went so far as to put them up in a parcel preparatory to sending them off by coach. She thus comments:--
"In returning the parcel I send away 60 letters, received in less than 12 months.
"_Sat.u.r.day, Sept. 19, 1835._ I have been to the Post Office with my last letter to the Duke and leave the result thereof with the Lord, "Whose ways are in the deep waters and whose footsteps are unknown". I have acknowledged myself thankful for the strength still imparted--thus fulfilling that gracious promise made to me when on my knees before I came to this place "I will never leave thee nor forsake thee." I have just risen from my knees, after spreading the Duke"s letters before the Lord, beseeching Him to do under present circ.u.mstances whatever seemeth good in His sight for Christ"s sake. And I feel, as a prayer-hearing G.o.d He will--causing even this unkindness to work together for good, since "His ways are not our ways" but as high above such as the heavens are above the earth--That He moves in a mysterious way His wonders to perform, who can doubt that watches His divine finger in this great work?
And since His purposes must stand, all I have to say is, Let them be whatever they may, I desire His Holy Will alone to be done!
"My feelings will not allow me to copy this letter of the Duke"s; it is so unkind; but as those words were powerfully applied at the commencement of my correspondence, "The haughtiness of man shall be brought low etc. and the Lord alone shall be exalted in that day.""
Apparently it was not the will of "The Lord" that the letters should be returned, for Providence interposed in the shape of Miss J."s friend, Mrs. L. Miss J. writes:--
"_Sat.u.r.day Night._ Just as my day had been filled with all the duties my G.o.d had graciously permitted and I was about to take a walk, dear Mrs. L. arrived, and on my telling her all strongly advised my _not_ returning the Duke his letters--which struck me forcibly, as I had asked the Lord to put it into her heart to advise me agreeably to His will.
"On my return home I found a note from the Duke addressed to me in the third person, like the last, but thanking me for the trouble I had taken respecting his Men"s Book Bill. Thank G.o.d my feelings are so subdued as to be resigned to His divine Will concerning seeing or hearing from him, and I heartily pray to be directed in every single particular, knowing if left to myself I cannot stand a moment in safety.
"The Duke seems more indifferent respecting the return of his letters--consequently as dearest Mrs. L. so strongly advised my retaining them I mean to do so without noticing that formal note received to night, leaving everything as it stands in the Lord"s Hands. Having cast my burthen upon the Lord all I now have to do is to dedicate my time more exclusively to my usual daily duties as before intended, endeavoring to recall perfectly to memory all my hymns--360--and the Gospels of St. Matthew and John, with my beautiful Psalms--which latter have been neglected more than either of the former, although none have been allowed so much time as if I had not been so occupied with the Duke.
"_Sept. 22nd._ My disinclination to write to the Duke continues. O may the Lord bless him by quickening his dead soul and call him forth to glorify Him mightily for Christ"s sake!
"_Oct. 1st, 1835._ How wonderful are the dealings of G.o.d. Last night I came home fully determined to write and send off a letter to the Duke and this morning, although it is ready for the Post Office, I am restrained from forwarding it. Therefore I keep it until I see why my mind is acted upon thus, feeling "it is the Lord." I knelt upon the bed in the night and implored Him to let His honor and glory alone be considered, and before I rose this morning, on again calling upon Him to direct me these words seemed to follow--"Be still and know that I am G.o.d, I will be exalted in the heavens, I will be exalted in the earth." So, as this is the case, it is my duty quietly and patiently to submit to the way He may condescendingly choose for that glorious purpose. In the mean time, in order to satisfy my feelings towards the poor dear Duke I can indulge in writing them at all events and thereby proving it is no want of feeling or friendship for him that keeps me silent, but the consideration due to ONE as far above Himself not only _in reality_ but I trust through the Grace of G.o.d in _my_ estimation also as the heavens are above the earth. Nor would I resign one of His gracious glorious smiles to become the Empress of a million worlds, even were my loved precious Duke the chosen individual to partic.i.p.ate in such honors.
"Perhaps the Duke"s conversion is at hand! Lord, if this be the case permit me through Thy Power and Grace to become the source of deep spiritual consolation to his precious soul, by being unto me a mouth and wisdom which all my adversaries shall not be able to gainsay or resist "for without Thee I can do nothing!""
MY LORD DUKE,--Judging from your silence to my last that all communication between us is about to cease, having written the accompanying Hymn for your acceptance, I take this opportunity of bidding you Farewell! being enabled through G.o.d"s Grace which is all sufficient! to exclaim in _Scripture_ language, "THE LORD GAVE and The Lord hath taken away _and_ BLESSED BE THE NAME OF THE LORD!" That HE brought you to me in the _first_ place I feel convinced and heartily hope that I have omitted no faithful Christian duty towards you consistent with my "high calling in Christ Jesus," _consequently_ shall not have cause to reproach myself of neglect when _that_ AWFUL period arrives which MUST bring us once more together, however separated on _earth_ by His ALL WISE _decrees_, "Whose paths are in the deep waters and Whose footsteps are not known,"--and Who knoweth FAR _better_ what is GOOD for us than we do for _ourselves_. Consequently it is our duty, and doubtless for our future and eventual happiness under any and all circ.u.mstances, however trying and painful such may be, to say THY will, O G.o.d, NOT MINE BE DONE! Trusting that you will not suppose any unkind feelings are experienced towards you by such DUE resignation to the Divine will or conclude that my future silence renders me forgetful of you _when kneeling_ before Him "Whose eyes are in EVERY place _beholding_ the evil and the good," with Whom the darkness is no darkness at all but the night is as clear as the day, I subscribe myself with much serenity as in His sight Ever My Lord Duke.
Your faithful Christian Friend,
A. J.
The hymn enclosed is ent.i.tled--
THE SHORTNESS OF TIME AND FRAILTY OF MAN.
ALMIGHTY _Maker_ of my frame!
TEACH ME _the number of my days_!
TEACH ME _to know how_ FRAIL _I am_ AND SPEND THE REMNANT TO THY PRAISE.