"Good-bye!" I murmured--"We shall meet again!"
And then I advanced towards the leaping flames. I felt their hot breath on my cheeks--the scorching wind of them lifted my hair through the folds of my veil--an idea came upon me that for some cause or other I was now to experience that "Change which men call Death"--and that through this means I should meet my Beloved on the other side of life--and with his name on my lips, and a pa.s.sionate appeal to him in my heart, I stepped into the glowing fire.
As I did so, I lost sight of Aselzion--of the chapel and of all those who watched my movements, and found myself surrounded on all sides by darting points of light which instead of scorching and withering me like a blown leaf in a storm, were like cool and fragrant showers playing all over me! Amazed, I went on--and as I went grew bolder. At one step I was bathed in a rain of delicate rays like sparkling diamond and topaz--at another a lovely violet light shrouded me in its rich hues--at another I walked in melting azure, like the hues of a summer sky--and the farther in I went the deeper and more glowing was the light about me. I felt it penetrating every pore of my skin--I held my hands out to it, and saw them look transparent in the fine luminance,--and presently, gaining courage, I threw back my veil and breathed in the radiance, as one breathes the air! My whole body grew light, and moved as though it floated rather than walked--I looked with unfatigued, undazzled eyes at the glittering flames that sparkled harmlessly about me and which changed to lovely shapes of flowers and leaves beneath my feet, and arched themselves over my head like branches of shading trees--and then all at once, down the long vista I caught sight of a Shape like that of an Angel!--an angel that waited for me with watchful eyes and outstretched arms!--it was but a moment that I saw this vision, and yet I knew what it meant, and I pressed on and on with all my Soul rising in me as it were, to go forth and reach that Companion of itself which stood waiting with such tender patience!
The light around me now changed to waves of intense luminance which swept upon me like waves of the sea--and I allowed myself to be borne along with them, I knew not whither. All at once I saw a vast Pillar of Fire which seemed to block my way,--pausing a moment, I looked and saw it break asunder and form the Cross and Star!--I gazed upward, wondering--its rays descending seemed to pierce my eyes, my brain, my very soul!--I sprang forward, dazed and dazzled, murmuring, "Let this be the end!"
Someone caught me in his arms--someone drew me to his breast, holding me there as if I were the dearest possession of all the world or life or time could give--and a voice, infinitely tender, answered me--
"Not the end, but the Endless, my beloved!--Mine at last, and mine for ever!--in triumph, in victory, in perfect joy!"
And then I knew!--I knew that I had found my love!--that it was Rafel Santoris who thus held me in his close embrace,--that I had fulfilled my own desire, which was to prove my faith if not my worthiness--that I had won all I wanted in this world and the next, and that nothing could ever separate our Souls, one from the other again! This is the deep eternal ecstasy of a knowledge divinely shared by the very angels of G.o.d, and of such supernal happiness nothing can be said or written!
I pen these last words on the deck of the "Dream" with my Beloved beside me. The sun is sinking in a glory of crimson--we are about to anchor in still waters. A rosy light flashes on our wonderful white sails, which will be presently furled; and we shall sit together, Rafel and I, watching the night draw its soft dark curtain around us, and the stars come out in the sky like diamonds embroidered on deep purple velvet, and listening to the gentle murmur of the little waves breaking into a rocky corner of the distant sh.o.r.e. And the evening will close on a day of peace and happiness,--one of the many unwearying, beautiful days which, like a procession of angels, bring us new and ever more perfect joy!
More than a year has elapsed since my "Probation" in the House of Aselzion,--since we, my Beloved and I, knelt before the Master and received his blessing on our eternal union. In that brief time I have lost all my "worldly" friends and acquaintances,--who have, if I may so express it, become afraid of me. Afraid, chiefly, because I possess all that the world can give me without their advice and a.s.sistance--and not only afraid, but offended, because I have found the Companion of my Soul with whom they have nothing in common. They look upon me as "lost to society" and cannot realise how much such loss is gain! Meanwhile we, Rafel and I, live our own radiant and happy lives, in full possession of all that makes life sweet and valuable, and wanting nothing that our own secret forces cannot supply. Wealth is ours--one of the least among the countless gifts Nature provides for those among her children who know where to find her inexhaustible riches--and we also enjoy the perfect health which accompanies the constant inflowing of an exhaustless vitality. And though the things we attain seem "miraculous" to others, so that even while accepting help and benefit at our hands, they frown and shake their heads at the att.i.tude we a.s.sume towards social hypocrisies and conventions, we are nevertheless able to create such "influences" around us, that none come near as without feeling stronger, better and more content,--and this is the utmost we are permitted to do for our fellow-creatures, inasmuch as none will listen to argument, and none will follow advice. The most ardent soul that ever dwelt in human form cannot lead another soul in the way of lasting life or lasting happiness if it refuses to go,--and there is no more absolute truth than this--That each man and each woman must make his or her own destiny both here and hereafter. This is the Law which changes not and which can never be subject to the slightest variation. Forgiveness of sins there is none--since every trespa.s.s against law carries its own punishment. Necessity for prayer there is none,--since every faithful wish and desire of the Soul is granted without parley. Necessity for praise there is much!--since the Soul lives and grows in the glory of its Creator. And the whole Secret of Everlasting Life and Happiness is contained in the full possession and control of the Divine Centre of ourselves--this "Radia" or living flame, which must be DUAL in order to be perfect, and which in its completed state, is an eternal Force which nothing can destroy and nothing can resist. All Nature harmonises with its action, and from Nature it draws its perpetual sustenance and increasing power.
To me, and my Beloved, the world is a garden of paradise--rich with beauty and delight. We live in it as a part of its loveliness--we draw into our own organisations the warmth of the sunlight, the glory of colour, the songs of sweet birds, the fragrance of flowers, and the exquisite vibrations of the light and air. Like two notes of a perfect chord we sound our lives on the keyboard of the Infinite--and we know that the music will become fuller and sweeter as the eternal seasons roll on. If it is asked why there should have been any necessity to pa.s.s through the psychic ordeal imposed on me by Aselzion, I reply--Look at the world in which men and women generally live, and say frankly whether its ways are such as to engender happiness! Look at society--look at politics--look at commerce--all mere schemes for self-aggrandis.e.m.e.nt! And more than all, look at the Sham of modern religion! Is it not too often a mere blasphemy and affront to the majesty of the Divine? And are not many, if not all these mistakes against Nature,--these offences against eternal Law,--the result of Man"s own "influence" working in opposition to the very decrees of G.o.d, which he disobeys even while recognising that they exist?
The chief point of Aselzion"s instruction was the test of the Brain and Soul against "influences"--the opposing influences of others--and this is truly the chief hindrance to all spiritual progress. The coward sentiment of fear itself is born in us through the influence of timorous persons--and it is generally the dread of what "other people will say" or what "other people will think" that holds us back from performing many a n.o.ble action. It should be thoroughly understood that in the eternal advancement of one"s own Soul "other people" and their influences are hindrances to progress. It does not matter a jot what anybody thinks or says, provided the central altar of one"s own Spirituality is clear and clean for the steadfast burning of the dual flame of Life and Love. All opinion, all criticism becomes absurd in such matters as these and absolutely worthless.
It does not affect me that anyone outside my sphere of thought should be incredulous of my beliefs,--nor can it move me from my happiness to know that persons who live their lives on a lower plane consider me a fool for electing to live mine on the highest. I take joy in the fact that even in so selfish and material an age as this, Aselzion still has his students and disciples,--a mere handful out of the million, it is true, but still sufficient to keep the beautiful truth of the Soul"s power alive and helpful to the chosen few. For such who have studied these truths and have mastered them sufficiently to practise them in the ordinary round of existence, Life presents an ever living happiness--and offers daily proof that there is no such thing as Death.
Youth remains where Love is, and Beauty stays with health and vitality.
Decay and destruction are changes which are brought about by apathy of the Will and indifference to the Soul"s existence, and the same Law which gives the Soul its supreme sovereignty equally works for its release from effete and inactive substances.
To those who would ask me how I am able to hold and keep the treasures of life, love and youth, which the majority of mankind are for ever losing, I answer that I can say no more than I have said, and the lesson which all may learn is contained in what I have written. It is no use arguing with those whom no argument will convince, or trying to teach those who will not be taught. We--my Beloved and I--can only prove the truth of the Soul"s absolute command over all spiritual, material and elemental forces by our One life and the way we live it--we, to whom everything that is necessary and desirable for our progress, comes on demand,--we, whom Science serves as an Aladdin"s lamp, realising every imaginable delight--we, with whom Love, which with many human beings is judged the most variable and transitory of emotions, is the very Principle of Life, the very essence of the waves of the air through which we move and have our being. The attainment of such happiness as ours is possible to all, but there is only One Way of Attainment, and the clue to that Way is in the Soul of each individual human being. Each one must find it and follow it, regardless of all "influences" which may be brought to bear on his or her actions,--each one must discover the Centre-poise of Life"s movement, and firmly abide by it. It is the Immortal Creature in each one of us whose destiny is to make eternal progress and advancement through endless phases of life, love and beauty, and when once we know and admit the actual existence of this Immortal Centre we shall realise that with it all things are possible, save Death. Radiating outward from itself, it can preserve the health and youth of the body it inhabits indefinitely, till of its own desire it seeks a higher plane of action,--radiating inwardly, it is an irresistible attractive force drawing to itself the powers and virtues of the planet on which it dwells, and making all the forces of visible and invisible Nature subject to its will and command.
This is one of those great Truths which the world denies, but which it is destined to learn within the next two thousand years.
If anyone should desire to know the fate of Motion Harland and his daughter, that fate has been precisely what they themselves brought about by their way of life and action. Morton Harland himself "died,"
as the world puts it, of a painful and lingering disease which could have been cured had he chosen to take the means offered to him through Rafel Santoris. He did not choose,--therefore the end was inevitable.
Catherine married Dr. Brayle, and they two now live a sufficiently wretched life together,--she, a moping, querulous invalid, and he as a "society" physician, possessed of great wealth and the position wealth brings. We never meet,--our ways are now for ever sundered. Mine is the upward and onward path--and with my Beloved I ascend the supernal heights where the Shadow of Evil never falls, and where the Secret of Life is centred in the Spirit of Love.
THE END