The Life of Trust

Chapter 13

3. There has been, since the formation of the Inst.i.tution, one adult school connected with it, in which, on the Lord"s day afternoons, since that time, about 150 adults have been instructed.

4. The number of Bibles and Testaments which have been circulated through the medium of our Inst.i.tution, during the last year, amounts to 452 copies.

There have been circulated since March 5, 1834, 6,044 copies of the Scriptures.

5. There have been laid out, during the last year, of the funds of the Inst.i.tution, 120, 10s. 2d. for missionary purposes.

6. There are at present ninety-one orphans in the three houses. The total number of the orphans who have been under our care from April 11, 1836, to December 9, 1840, amounts to 129.

_Without any one having been asked for anything by us_, the sum of 3,937, 1s. 1d. has been given to us for the Orphan Houses, _as the result of prayer to G.o.d_, since the commencement of the work.

THE BLESSING OF THE LORD UPON THE WORK IN REFERENCE TO THE SOULS OF THE CHILDREN.

1. During the last fourteen months there have been meetings purposely for children, at which the Scriptures have been expounded to them. At these meetings an almost universal attention is manifested by them, which I thankfully ascribe to the Lord, and upon which I look as a forerunner of greater blessing.

2. During the last year three of the Sunday-school children have been received into fellowship.

3. At the end of last year there had been eight orphans received into communion; during the present year fourteen have been received; in all, twenty-two.

It was stated in the last year"s Report that we were looking for fruit upon our labors as it regards the conversion of the children, as the Lord had given to us a measure of earnestness in praying for them. The Lord has dealt with us according to our expectations. But I expect far more than what we have seen. While the chief object of our work has been and is still the manifestation of the heart of G.o.d towards his children, and the reality of power with G.o.d in prayer, yet, as we hoped, and as it has been our prayer, the Lord gives to us also the joy of seeing one child after another brought to stand openly on the Lord"s side. As far as my experience goes, it appears to me that believers generally have expected far too little of _present_ fruit upon their labors among children. There has been a hoping that the Lord some day or other would own the instruction which they give to children, and would answer at some time or other, though after many years only, the prayers which they offer up on their behalf. Now, while such pa.s.sages as Proverbs xxii. 6, Ecclesiastes xi. 1, Galatians vi. 9, 1 Cor. xv. 58, give unto us a.s.surance not merely respecting everything which we do for the Lord, in general, but also respecting bringing up children in the fear of the Lord, in particular, that our labor is not in vain in the Lord; yet we have to guard against abusing such pa.s.sages, by thinking it a matter of little moment whether we see _present_ fruit or not; but, on the contrary, we should give the Lord no rest till we see present fruit, and therefore in persevering yet submissive prayer we should make known our requests unto G.o.d. I add, as an encouragement to believers who labor among children, that during the last two years seventeen other young persons or children, from the age of eleven and a half to seventeen, have been received into fellowship among us, and that I am looking out now for many more to be converted, and that not merely of the orphans, but of the Sunday and day school children. As in so many respects we live in remarkable times, so in this respect also, that the Lord is working greatly among the children in many places.

The total of the expenses connected with the objects of the Inst.i.tution, exclusive of the Orphan Houses, from November 19, 1839, to November 19, 1840, is 622, 2s. 6d. The balance in hand on Nov. 19, 1840, was 13, 2s. 9d.

The total of the expenses connected with the three Orphan Houses, from December 9, 1839, to December 9, 1840, is 900, 11s. 2d. The balance in hand on December 9, 1840, was 15, 1s. 6d.

REVIEW OF THE YEAR 1840.

1. As to the church. There are 525 at present in communion; 114 have been added during the past year, of whom 47 have been brought to the knowledge of the Lord among us.

2. As to the supply of my temporal necessities. The Lord has been pleased to send me, by the freewill offerings of the saints, 242, 8s. 11.[17]

[Footnote 17: It may not be improper to state here that the little patrimony to which Mr. Muller became ent.i.tled upon the decease of his father was devoted to the purposes of charity and religion, in accordance with the principle of action indicated on page 67. This fact is not mentioned by Mr. M., but has come to the knowledge of the editor through another channel.--ED.]

CHAPTER XIII.

FAITH STRENGTHENED BY EXERCISE.

1841.

A WANT SUPPLIED--RESOURCES EXCEEDING THE DEMAND--EVIL OF SURETYSHIP--POWER OF CHRISTIAN LOVE--G.o.d"S WORD THE FOOD OF THE SOUL--PREPARATION FOR THE HOUR OF TRIAL--POVERTY--DEPENDING ONLY ON THE LIVING G.o.d.

January 1, 1841. During this week we have daily met for prayer, for the especial purpose of asking the Lord to give us the means of having the last year"s Report printed. It is three weeks since it might have been sent to the press. We felt this now to be a matter of especial importance, as, if the Report were not soon printed, it would be known that it arose from want of means. By the donations which came in during these last days for the orphans, and by ten pounds which was given to-day for the other funds, we have the means of defraying the expense of about two thirds of the printing, and therefore a part of the ma.n.u.script was sent off, trusting that the Lord would be pleased to send in more means before two sheets are printed off; but if not, we should then stop till we have more. _Evening._ There came in still further five pounds; also, ten shillings and three shillings.

Jan. 11. Monday. During the last week the Lord not only supplied us richly with all we needed for the orphans, but enabled us to put by several pounds towards printing the Report. On Sat.u.r.day evening there was only three shillings sixpence left. On this account I was looking out for answers to my prayers for means, and the Lord did not disappoint me. There came in altogether yesterday nine pounds sixteen shillings fourpence. We have now enough even for the last part of the Report.

Jan. 12. To-day I have received a letter from a brother, in which he empowers me to draw upon his bankers, during this year, to the amount of one thousand pounds, for any brethren who have it in their hearts to give themselves to missionary service in the East Indies, and whom I shall consider called for this service, as far as I am able to judge.

[This power lasted only for that year; but no brethren who seemed to be suitable offered themselves for this service. This is another fresh proof how much more easily pecuniary means can be obtained than suitable individuals. Indeed, in all my experience I have found it thus, that if I could only settle that a certain thing to be done was according to the will of G.o.d, the means were soon obtained to carry it into effect.]

Jan. 13. This evening I was called to the house of a brother and sister who are in the deepest distress. The brother had become surety for the debts of his son, not in the least expecting that he ever should be called upon for the payment of them; but, as his son has not discharged his debts, the father has been called upon to do so; and except the money is paid within a few days, he will be imprisoned.

How precious it is, even for this life, to act according to the word of G.o.d! This perfect revelation of his mind gives us directions for everything, even the most minute affairs of this life. It commands us, "Be not thou one of them that strike hands, or of them that are sureties for debts." Prov. xxii. 26. The way in which Satan ensnares persons, to bring them into the net, and to bring trouble upon them by becoming sureties, is, that he seeks to represent the matter as if there were no danger connected with that particular case, and that one might be sure one should never be called upon to pay the money; but the Lord, the faithful Friend, tells us in his own word that the only way "to be sure"

in such a matter is "to hate suretyship." Prov. xi. 15. The following points seem to me of solemn moment for consideration, if I were called upon to become surety for another: 1. What obliges the person who wishes me to become surety for him to need a surety? Is it really a good cause in which I am called upon to become surety? I do not remember ever to have met with a case in which in a plain, and G.o.dly, and in all respects scriptural matter such a thing occurred. There was generally some sin or other connected with it. 2. If I become surety, notwithstanding what the Lord has said to me in his word, am I in such a position that no one will be injured by my being called upon to fulfil the engagements of the person for whom I am going to be surety? In most instances this alone ought to keep one from it. 3. If still I become surety, the amount of money for which I become responsible must be so in my power that I am able to produce it whenever it is called for, in order that the name of the Lord may not be dishonored. 4. But if there be the possibility of having to fulfil the engagements of the person in whose stead I have to stand, is it the will of the Lord that I should spend my means in that way? Is it not rather his will that my means should be spent in another way? 5. How can I get over the plain word of the Lord, which is to the contrary, even if the first four points could be satisfactorily settled?

March 4. From February 22 up to this day our necessities in the day schools were supplied by thirteen small donations, and by a donation of eight pounds from Q. Q. To-day I received fifteen pounds. When this arrived there was not one penny in hand for the day schools, whilst two days after about seven pounds was needed. This money came from a considerable distance, and from a brother who never had a.s.sisted in this work before, whereby the Lord afresh shows how easily he can raise up new helpers.

For the encouragement of believers, who are tried by having unconverted relatives and friends, I will relate the following circ.u.mstance, the truth of which I know.

Baron Von K., who resided in my own country, the kingdom of Prussia, had been for many years a disciple of the Lord Jesus. Even about the commencement of this century, when there was almost universal darkness or even open infidelity spread over the whole continent of Europe, he knew the Lord Jesus; and when, about the year 1806, there was the greatest distress in Silesia among many thousands of weavers, this blessed man of G.o.d took the following gracious step for his Lord and Master. As the weavers had no employment, the whole continent almost being in an unsettled state on account of Napoleon"s career, it seemed to him the will of the Lord that he should use his very considerable property to furnish these poor weavers with work, in order to save them from the greatest state of dest.i.tution, though in doing this there was not only no prospect of gain, but the certain prospect of immense loss.

He therefore found employment for about six thousand weavers. But he was not content with this. Whilst he gave the bread which perishes, he also sought to minister to the souls of these weavers. To that end he sought to set believers as overseers over this immense weaving concern, and not only saw to it that the weavers were instructed in spiritual things, but he himself also set the truth before them. Thus it went on for a good while, till at last, on account of the loss of the chief part of his property, he was obliged to think about giving it up. But by this time this precious act of mercy had so commended itself to the government that it was taken up by them and carried on till the times altered.

Baron von K. was, however, appointed director of the whole concern as long as it existed.

This dear man of G.o.d was not content with this. He travelled through many countries to visit the prisons, for the sake of improving the temporal and spiritual condition of the prisoners, and among all the other things which he sought to do for the Lord was this also in particular: He a.s.sisted poor students whilst at the university of Berlin, especially those who studied divinity, as it is called, in order to get access to them, and to win them for the Lord. One day a most talented young man, whose father lived at Breslau, where there is likewise a university, heard of the aged baron"s kindness to students, and he therefore wrote to him, requesting him to a.s.sist him, as his own father could not well afford to support him any longer, having other children to provide for. A short time afterwards young T. received a most kind reply from the baron, inviting him to come to Berlin; but, before this letter arrived, the young student had heard that Baron von K. was a pietist or mystic, as true believers are contemptuously called in Germany; and as young T. was of a highly philosophical turn of mind, reasoning about everything, questioning the truth of revelation, yea, questioning, most sceptically, the existence of G.o.d, he much disliked the prospect of going to the old baron. Still, he thought he could but try, and if he did not like it, he was not bound to remain in connection with him. He arrived in Berlin on a day when there was a great review of the troops, and, being full of this, he began to speak about it to the steward of the baron. The steward, however, being a believer, turned the conversation, before the young student was aware of it, to spiritual things; and yet he could not say that it had been forced. He began another subject, and a third, but still it always came presently again to spiritual things.

At last the baron came, who received young T. in the most affectionate and familiar manner, as if he had been his equal, and as if young T.

bestowed a favor on him, rather than that he was favored by the baron.

The baron offered him a room in his own house, and a place at his own table, while he should be studying in Berlin, which young T. accepted.

He now sought in every way to treat the young student in the most kind and affectionate way, and as much as possible to serve him, and to show him the power of the gospel in his own life, without arguing with him, yea, without speaking to him directly about his soul. For, discovering in young T. a most reasoning and sceptical mind, he avoided in every possible way getting into any argument with him, while the young student again and again said to himself, "I wish I could get into an argument with this old fool; I would show him his folly." But the baron avoided it. When the young student used to come home in the evening, and the baron heard him come, he would himself go to meet him on entering the house, would light his candle, would a.s.sist and serve him, in any way he could, even to the fetching the bootjack for him, and helping him to take off his boots. Thus this lowly aged disciple went on for some time, whilst the young student still sought an opportunity for arguing with him, but wondered nevertheless how the baron could thus serve him. One evening, on the return of young T. to the baron"s house, when the baron was making himself his servant as usual, he could refrain himself no longer, but burst out thus: "Baron, how can you do all this? You see I do not care about you, and how are you able to continue to be so kind to me, and thus to serve me?" The baron replied, "My dear young friend, I have learned it from the Lord Jesus. I wish you would read through the Gospel of John. Good night." The student now for the first time in his life sat down and read the word of G.o.d in a disposition of mind to be willing to learn, whilst up to that time he had never read the Holy Scriptures but with the view of wishing to find out arguments against them. It pleased G.o.d to bless him. From that time he became himself a follower of the Lord Jesus, and has been so ever since.

May 7. It has recently pleased the Lord to teach me a truth, irrespective of human instrumentality, as far as I know, the benefit of which I have not lost, though now, while preparing the fifth edition for the press, more than fourteen years have since pa.s.sed away. The point is this: I saw more clearly than ever that the first great and primary business to which I ought to attend every day was, to have my soul happy in the Lord. The first thing to be concerned about was not how much I might serve the Lord, how I might glorify the Lord; but how I might get my soul into a happy state, and how my inner man might be nourished. For I might seek to set the truth before the unconverted, I might seek to benefit believers, I might seek to relieve the distressed, I might in other ways seek to behave myself as it becomes a child of G.o.d in this world; and yet, not being happy in the Lord, and not being nourished and strengthened in my inner man day by day, all this might not be attended to in a right spirit. Before this time my practice had been, at least for ten years previously, as an habitual thing to give myself to prayer, after having dressed myself in the morning. Now, I saw that the most important thing I had to do was to give myself to the reading of the word of G.o.d, and to meditation on it, that thus my heart might be comforted, encouraged, warned, reproved, instructed; and that thus, by means of the word of G.o.d, whilst meditating on it, my heart might be brought into experimental communion with the Lord.

I began therefore to meditate on the New Testament from the beginning, early in the morning. The first thing I did, after having asked in a few words the Lord"s blessing upon his precious word, was, to begin to meditate on the word of G.o.d, searching as it were into every verse, to get blessing out of it; not for the sake of the public ministry of the word, not for the sake of preaching on what I had meditated upon, but for the sake of obtaining food for my own soul. The result I have found to be almost invariably this, that after a very few minutes my soul has been led to confession, or to thanksgiving, or to intercession, or to supplication; so that, though I did not, as it were, give myself to _prayer_, but to _meditation_, yet it turned almost immediately more or less into prayer. When thus I have been for a while making confession, or intercession, or supplication, or have given thanks, I go on to the next words or verse, turning all, as I go on, into prayer for myself or others, as the word may lead to it, but still continually keeping before me that food for my own soul is the object of my meditation. The result of this is, that there is always a good deal of confession, thanksgiving, supplication, or intercession mingled with my meditation, and that my inner man almost invariably is even sensibly nourished and strengthened, and that by breakfast time, with rare exceptions, I am in a peaceful if not happy state of heart. Thus also the Lord is pleased to communicate unto me that which, either very soon after or at a later time, I have found to become food for other believers, though it was not for the sake of the public ministry of the word that I gave myself to meditation, but for the profit of my own inner man.

With this mode I have likewise combined the being out in the open air for an hour, an hour and a half, or two hours, before breakfast, walking about in the fields, and in the summer sitting for a little on the stiles, if I find it too much to walk all the time. I find it very beneficial to my health to walk thus for meditation before breakfast, and am now so in the habit of using the time for that purpose, that when I get into the open air I generally take out a New Testament of good-sized type, which I carry with me for that purpose, besides my Bible; and I find that I can profitably spend my time in the open air, which formerly was not the case, for want of habit. I used to consider the time spent in walking a loss, but now I find it very profitable, not only to my body, but also to my soul. The walking out before breakfast is of course not necessarily connected with this matter, and every one has to judge according to his strength and other circ.u.mstances.

The difference, then, between my former practice and my present one is this: Formerly, when I rose, I began to pray as soon as possible, and generally spent all my time till breakfast in prayer, or almost all the time. At all events I almost invariably began with prayer, except when I felt my soul to be more than usually barren, in which case I read the word of G.o.d for food, or for refreshment, or for a revival and renewal of my inner man, before I gave myself to prayer. But what was the result? I often spent a quarter of an hour, or half an hour, or even an hour, on my knees, before being conscious to myself of having derived comfort, encouragement, humbling of soul, etc.; and often, after having suffered much from wandering of mind for the first ten minutes, or a quarter of an hour, or even half an hour, I only then began _really to pray_. I scarcely ever suffer now in this way. For my heart being nourished by the truth, being brought into _experimental_ fellowship with G.o.d, I speak to my Father and to my Friend (vile though I am, and unworthy of it) about the things that he has brought before me in his precious word. It often now astonishes me that I did not sooner see this point. In no book did I ever read about it. No public ministry ever brought the matter before me. No private intercourse with a brother stirred me up to this matter. And yet now, since G.o.d has taught me this point, it is as plain to me as anything, that the first thing the child of G.o.d has to do morning by morning is, to _obtain food for his inner man_. As the outward man is not fit for work for any length of time except we take food, and as this is one of the first things we do in the morning, so it should be with the inner man. We should take food for that, as every one must allow. Now what is the food for the inner man?

Not _prayer_, but _the word of G.o.d_; and here again, not the simple reading of the word of G.o.d, so that it only pa.s.ses through our minds, just as water runs through a pipe, but considering what we read, pondering over it, and applying it to our hearts. When we pray, we speak to G.o.d. Now, prayer, in order to be continued for any length of time in any other than a formal manner, requires, generally speaking, a measure of strength or G.o.dly desire, and the season, therefore, when this exercise of the soul can be most effectually performed is after the inner man has been nourished by meditation on the word of G.o.d, where we find our Father speaking to us, to encourage us, to comfort us, to instruct us, to humble us, to reprove us. We may therefore profitably meditate, with G.o.d"s blessing, though we are ever so weak spiritually; nay, the weaker we are, the more we need meditation for the strengthening of our inner man. There is thus far less to be feared from wandering of mind than if we give ourselves to prayer without having had previously time for meditation. I dwell so particularly on this point because of the immense spiritual profit and refreshment I am conscious of having derived from it myself, and I affectionately and solemnly beseech all my fellow-believers to ponder this matter. By the blessing of G.o.d I ascribe to this mode the help and strength which I have had from G.o.d to pa.s.s in peace through deeper trials, in various ways, than I had ever had before; and after having now above fourteen years tried this way, I can most fully, in the fear of G.o.d, commend it. In addition to this I generally read, after family prayer, larger portions of the word of G.o.d, when I still pursue my practice of reading regularly onward in the Holy Scriptures, sometimes in the New Testament and sometimes in the Old, and for more than twenty-six years I have proved the blessedness of it. I take, also, either then or at other parts of the day, time more especially for prayer.

How different, when the soul is refreshed and made happy early in the morning, from what it is when, without spiritual preparation, the service, the trials, and the temptations of the day come upon one!

Oct. 1. When I had again not one penny in hand for the necessities of this day, there was brought to me this morning ten shillings for the orphans, which had been sent from Kensington. In the paper which contained the money, was written: "_Your Heavenly Father_ knoweth that ye have need of _these_ things." "Trust in the Lord." This word of our Lord is to me of more value than many bank notes. About five minutes later I received from an Irish sister ten pounds, through her banker in London. I mention here, as a point particularly to be noticed, that after the season of comparative abundance had come to an end in September, the Lord did not _at once_ allow us to be so sharply tried as we were afterwards. He dealt in the same gentle way with us three years before, when the trials of faith in this part of the work first commenced.

Nov. 2. At a time of the greatest poverty one pound was sent by a lady from Birmingham. About half an hour afterwards I received ten pounds from a brother who had saved up one hundred and fifty pounds, and put it into a savings bank, but who now sees that to devote this money to the promotion of the work of G.o.d tends more to the glory of the name of Jesus than to retain it in the savings bank upon interest for a time of sickness or old age; for he is a.s.sured that should such times come, the same Lord, who has. .h.i.therto cared for him whilst in health and strength and able to work, will also care for him then. The same brother gave me three pounds a fortnight since. This ten pounds came in very seasonably; for, though we had been able to provide for the absolute necessities of to-day, yet there was want in many respects, especially as a boy is just going out as an apprentice, who needs tools and an outfit.

Nov. 13. Sat.u.r.day. This morning I took one shilling out of the box in my house. This shilling was all there was towards the need of to-day.

Pause, dear reader, for a few moments! Consider that there are more than a hundred persons to be provided with everything they require; consider that there is no money in hand; and consider also that this is the case not once nor twice in the course of the year, but very frequently. Is it not precious, under such circ.u.mstances, to have the living G.o.d as a father to go to, who is ever able and ever willing to help, as it may be really needed? And to this privilege every one has a t.i.tle who believes in the Lord Jesus, being as such a child of G.o.d. Galatians iii. 26. For though all believers in the Lord Jesus are not called upon to establish orphan houses, schools for poor children, etc., and trust in G.o.d for means; yet all believers, according to the will of G.o.d concerning them in Christ Jesus, may cast, and ought to cast, all their care upon him who careth for them, and need not be anxiously concerned about anything, as is plainly to be seen from 1 Peter v. 7, Philippians iv. 6, Matthew vi. 25-34. Under these circ.u.mstances of need, a silver watch, which _only yesterday afternoon_ had become the property of the orphan fund, was disposed of, whereby we were helped through the expenses of to-day.

The coals are almost gone in each of the houses. Every article of provision, etc., is likewise much reduced. Truly, we are exceedingly poor; nevertheless there are the necessary provisions till Monday morning, and thus we are brought to the close of another week. This afternoon all the laborers met for prayer.

Nov. 14. When we met again this afternoon for prayer, we had reason to praise, for the Lord had sent in means. This morning was given to me five pounds, and six shillings had come in by sale of articles.

Nov. 15. Last Friday brother Craik and I had a meeting for inquirers and candidates for fellowship. We saw eight, and had to send away ten whom we could not see, our strength being quite gone after we had seen the eight, one after another. This evening we saw seven, and had to send away three.

Nov. 16. The last four days we have daily met for prayer, there being no means to pay the teachers in the day schools. Besides this, we need a stove in one of the school-rooms; also some Bibles and tracts. To-day I received two pounds from a brother at Exmouth.

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