_Wild_. Well, as I said, my suit"s a thriving one.
_Con_. You mean you are beloved again!--I don"t Believe it.
_Wild_. I can give you proof.
_Con_. What proof?
Love letters? She"s a shameless maid To write them! Can she spell? Ay, I suppose With prompting of a dictionary!
_Wild_. Nay Without one.
_Con_. I will lay you ten to one She cannot spell! How know you she can spell?
You cannot spell yourself! You write command With a single M-C-O-M-A-N-D: Yours to Co-mand.
_Wild_. I did not say she wrote Love letters to me.
_Con_. Then she suffers you to press Her hand, perhaps?
_Wild_. She does.
_Con_. Does she press yours?
_Wild_. She does.--It goes on swimmingly! [Aside.]
_Con_. She does!
She is no modest woman! I"ll be bound, Your arm the madam suffers round her waist?
_Wild_. She does!
_Con_. She does! Outrageous forwardness!
Does she let you kiss her?
_Wild_. Yes.
_Con_. She should be--
_Wild_. What?
_Con_. What you got thrice your share of when at school, And yet not half your due! A brazen face!
More could not grant a maid about to wed.
_Wild_. She is so.
_Con_. What?
_Wild_. How swimmingly it goes! [Aside.]
_Con_. [With suppressed impatience.] Are you about to marry, neighbour Wildrake?
Are you about to marry?
_Wild_. Excellent. [Aside.]
_Con_. [Breaking out.] Why don"t you answer me?
_Wild_. I am.
_Con_. You are-- I tell you what, sir--You"re a fool!
_Wild_. For what?
_Con_. You are not fit to marry. Do not know Enough of the world, sir! Have no more experience, Thought, judgment, than a schoolboy! Have no mind Of your own!--your wife will make a fool of you, Will jilt you, break your heart! I wish she may I do! You have no more business with a wife; Than I have! Do you mean to say, indeed, You are about to marry?
_Wild_. Yes, indeed.
_Con_. And when?
_Wild_. I"ll say to-morrow! [Aside.]
_Con_. When, I say?
_Wild_. To-morrow.
_Con_. Thank you: much beholden to you!
You"ve told me on"t in time! I"m very much Beholden to you, neighbour Wildrake!
And, I pray you, at what hour?
_Wild_. That we have left For you to name.
_Con_. For me!
_Wild_. For you.
_Con_. Indeed.
You"re very bountiful! I should not wonder Meant you I should be bridemaid to the lady?
_Wild_. "Tis just the thing I mean!
_Con_. [Furiously.] The thing you mean!
Now pray you, neighbour, tell me that again, And think before you speak; for much I doubt You know what you are saying. Do you mean To ask me to be bridemaid?
_Wild_. Even so.
_Con_. Bridemaid?
_Wild_. Ay, bridemaid!--It is coming fast Unto a head. [Aside.]
_Con_. And "tis for me you wait To fix the day? It shall be doomsday, then!
_Wild_. Be doomsday?