"No."
"Leave it to you to find the only other lesbian in the netherworld. She hot?"
"Very pretty, yes."
"And a kid? You always run the other direction when my nieces come over."
Morgan smiled. "I haven"t seen him climb the walls and break stuff like they do."
"Okay, let"s use our logic," Celeste said, sounding like she did when she spoke to her nieces. "You"re probably a little lonely, a little h.o.r.n.y, and this woman is looking really good right now. If I were in your shoes, I"d probably be reaching out to anyone I could get my hands on. That"s really what she is-a beacon in a storm."
There was great plausibility in what Celeste had to say. To Morgan"s ear, it sounded so simple, but her heart wanted to argue otherwise. "What if my feelings are genuine, though? I think she might kind of like me, too."
Celeste was kind but firm. "You"re going through one of the roughest spots in your life. Morgan, you don"t know your head from a hole in the ground right now. She"s probably a great woman, but you stand the chance of really breaking her heart if you pursue this. And she has a kid that could get hurt, too. Here"s my advice, but I have to tell you I don"t think I could do this. Tell her what you"re feeling and where you"re at. If she has half a brain, she"ll back away."
Morgan"s brows rose as she looked at the house on the hill. "Freak her out and make her run away?"
"Just be honest. If what you have to say doesn"t cause her to be concerned, that should tell you something. She"s either stupid or one of those who doesn"t bother to care to look before she leaps. And I know you, that"ll turn you off in a heartbeat."
"It"s good advice," Morgan agreed as her heart sank a little.
"I wish you would"ve stayed here where I could keep an eye on your a.s.s. I was telling Keesha the other day that we should"ve just chained you to something and walked you like a dog."
"You say the sweetest things."
"That"s why Keesha loves me. I don"t smell any d.a.m.n coffee brewing," Celeste yelled. "Out? Oh, my G.o.d," she groaned.
"Take your love to breakfast and be sweet to her."
"Gonna have to, there ain"t a d.a.m.n thing to eat in the kitchen except some diet c.r.a.p she knows I despise. Call me when you need me to think for you again. I can"t have you wandering around the woods with your head up your a.s.s."
"Oh, Brad and Tonya are pregnant."
"You"re s.h.i.tting me."
"No, she"s three months, and Brad is beside himself."
"Aw, Auntie Morgan, how sweet. Call me."
"I will, catch you later."
"Better, love you, bye."
Morgan walked up on the porch with a bag in her hand and knocked on Jaclyn"s back door. A moment later, Jaclyn opened it with a smile.
"You"re mighty brave or really foolish for coming over here," she said.
"I know you said you had everything you needed, but I got some tea that"s supposed to help with congestion and some stuff you should take to strengthen your immune system. How"s he feeling?" Morgan asked as she handed Jaclyn the bag.
"Pretty funky. He"s asleep right now."
Morgan steeled her nerves. "Could you come out here for a minute so we can talk?"
Jaclyn nodded and set the bag on the counter. "Is something wrong?"
"Uh...yeah, I"m having some problems." Morgan stuffed her hands into the pockets of her shorts and backed away from the door when Jaclyn stepped out.
Jaclyn folded her arms and looked at Morgan with concern. "Is it Thor?"
"No," Morgan said with a nervous smile. "Would you sit down?" Jaclyn took a seat on the porch swing and watched her pace. "I"m trying to be very adult here, and that calls for honesty." Morgan walked over to the porch railing and leaned against it, looking out at the water. She waved a hand as if trying to find the right words. "I"m struggling with a lot of different emotions."
"You"re in a vulnerable place."
"Yes," Morgan agreed, keeping her back turned. "I have such a good time with you. I feel so relaxed when we"re together. I"m happier than I"ve been in months, maybe longer. You make me feel...I acted like a d.i.c.k this morning because I was trying to distance myself because I"m attracted to you. If I get too comfortable here, then I have to leave...I don"t know if I can afford to let myself go there."
"I understand," Jaclyn said softly. "I know where you"re at, and I appreciate you being honest. We can agree right here just to be friends, or if it makes things easier, we can just not spend as much time together."
"That"s going to be hard with the regatta." Morgan pounded softly on the porch railing. "I enjoy being with you too much."
"I like you too, but I know you"re here temporarily," Jaclyn admitted with a sigh, "but I"d like to think-hope-we can keep this in its proper perspective. Let"s just be friends, and if that gets too difficult, we"ll have to be honest with each other."
Morgan slowly turned and looked at Jaclyn. "Thank you for being so understanding. You-"
Austin was standing at the window overlooking the porch with his hair pointing in all different directions. He put his hand to the gla.s.s. "Don"t put the decorations on Thor without me, okay?"
Jaclyn watched as Morgan walked across the porch and put her hand on the gla.s.s in front of his. "You know I wouldn"t do that. We"re in this together, right?"
Austin smiled wearily. Jaclyn smiled too, but inside, she felt a sense of loss. Morgan was good with her son. And she couldn"t deny that she was as enamored with Morgan as he was, just in a different way. Fate seemed so cruel for dangling the perfect woman in her face and daring her to reach out for her.
"Go back to bed, you look like c.r.a.p," Morgan said with a laugh. Austin rolled his eyes and ambled away from the window. "I"m gonna go now. I have a few things to do around the house."
"Okay," Jaclyn said as she stood. She and Morgan stared at each other awkwardly before Morgan hugged her quickly.
"Thanks for being my friend," Morgan said as she retreated.
Jaclyn watched her go. Her cell phone started ringing, Maddie was on the ID. Jaclyn looked across the lake and shot her the finger, knowing that Maddie had her binoculars out again.
I like you, too. That sentence bounced around in Morgan"s brain all afternoon. Did that mean that Jaclyn felt the same way? Morgan wondered. She thought she would"ve been better off if Jaclyn would"ve laughed at her and said, "Honey, you"re not my type." That would"ve been easier to cope with, though Morgan never wanted to hear those words from a woman who held her interest.
Jaclyn had been right about the Laundromat. It was pretty funky. Morgan spent the extra money to run bleach through an entire wash cycle before she washed her things. The book she"d brought along could not keep her attention as the steady thump of the washers put her in a trance. Images floated around in her mind-Jaclyn"s smile, Austin going to his first prom, Jaclyn swinging lazily on her porch swing, Austin graduating, and Morgan standing at Jaclyn"s side as he drove away to college. She blinked and looked up at a woman putting her clothes in a dryer. A little boy sat nearby playing with a toy truck.
In the past when Morgan envisioned her future, she"d seen herself with a woman like her, living in the house she always wanted. Ranch style, brick, on a tree-lined block, and it was always very quiet, clean, everything in order. No kids to make noise and disturb anything. That imaginary life had been something she longed for, but now, it didn"t seem so appealing.
Jaclyn"s words filtered through the images and made Morgan"s mind go blank. I know where you"re at. Morgan smiled ruefully as she saw herself at the intersection of f.u.c.ked-up and confused. She dug deeper into her psyche looking for clues, and suddenly, it became crystal clear, or so she thought. With the death of her father and the displacement, she was longing for home, that feeling of security, of warmth, and she"d found it in Jaclyn and Austin. They simply made her feel at home. It was all a mirage for the wandering soul.
Chapter Eighteen.
"You okay?"
Jaclyn blinked and looked at Austin, who was curled up on the couch in a blanket coc.o.o.n. "I"m fine, why?"
"You"ve been sitting there for an hour staring out into s.p.a.ce." Austin pointed to the TV where the movie Dark Shadows played. "You love Johnny Depp, and you haven"t looked or laughed at him once. Am I in trouble?"
"Have you done something you"re feeling guilty about?"
Austin shook his head. "I can"t think of anything...okay, I drank some orange juice from the container, but my throat hurt and I didn"t feel like getting a gla.s.s."
"Well, thank you for admitting that. I"ll know not to drink any. If you"re too ill to get a gla.s.s, then let me know when you need something. You"re going to the doctor tomorrow."
"Okay, okay, I was just being lazy."
Jaclyn smiled. "You"re going anyway. Let me check the soup." She patted his head on her way to the kitchen, needing something to get her mind off the earlier conversation with Morgan. Unlike Morgan, she had no excuses. She wasn"t in that place where all her emotions were a jumble and she was looking for refuge. She genuinely enjoyed Morgan"s company, looked forward to seeing her walk through the door of the store. So what was her reason for becoming so captivated by a woman she barely knew?
Jaclyn owned the fact that she was a nurturer, and Morgan was someone who needed special care. She empathized with Morgan"s feeling of loss and suffering because she had been in her shoes only a year before. Physical attraction played a big part, as well. Morgan"s mouth was deliciously kissable. Just the sight of her or feeling the warmth of her body when she was near stoked sparks into flames.
She stirred the soup, inhaling deeply the seasonings. The last of Jaclyn"s theories resonated as the most sound. Morgan wasn"t staying in White Oak Lake. Knowing that allowed her to ponder all sorts of romantic notions because she felt safe in doing so. With the other women she dated, she was too busy studying them, sizing up the prospective suitors to see if they would be right for her and more importantly for Austin. There was no pressure with Morgan because in the end she would leave and take any shortcomings with her. Jaclyn frowned as she stared out the window. The only problem was, Morgan didn"t appear to have any fatal flaws.
Jaclyn"s cell phone tore her from her ruminations. "I need your help."
The tone of Maddie"s voice pulled Jaclyn up short. "What"s wrong?"
"Heath took the kids to see his mom. I"m alone at the store, and I"m stuck...in something."
"Austin"s sick, is it-"
"I need you to come right now, okay?"
"I"ll be right there." Jaclyn stepped into the living room. "Hey, buddy, I have to go help Aunt Maddie with something right now."
Austin sat up. His eyes widened when he saw the expression on her face. "What"s wrong?"
"I don"t know, but I have to go to the store right away. You just stay where you are and I"ll be back soon."
"Okay, but call and let me know what"s going on."
"I will."
Jaclyn switched on her emergency flashers and wasted no time. She threw gravel as her tires left the driveway and skidded onto the road. She only glanced at Morgan as they met in the curve, her heart pounding. The tone of Maddie"s voice unnerved her.
Morgan slowed down as she pa.s.sed Jaclyn"s house and noticed Austin on the back porch wrapped in a blanket looking toward the lake. She turned the Jeep around and pulled into the driveway. He looked worried when she got out. "What"s going on?"
"I don"t know. Mom said Aunt Maddie needed her, and she tore out of here like a bat out of h.e.l.l."
The air was hot and humid despite it being fall. "Should you be outside?"
Austin shrugged. "I wanna know what"s going on."
Morgan climbed the steps. "Back inside. I need you well and soon. We have Thor to finish."
"My head is really hurting again." Austin picked up the box of cold medicine and looked at it. "I haven"t had any of this since this morning. Can I take some more?"
Morgan put a hand to his forehead. "You"re awfully hot. What time did you take the last dose, do you remember?"
"Around seven."
Morgan glanced at the clock, it was two thirty. "Have you eaten?"
Austin sniffed as he wrapped the blanket tighter around himself. "I"m not hungry."
"Well, I don"t want to give this to you on an empty stomach. You eat a bowl of soup, and if your mom isn"t back by then, I"ll give you another dose."
Maddie"s car was in the parking lot behind the store, but it was locked up tight since they were closed. Jaclyn banged on the door, and when she didn"t receive an answer, she used her key. "Maddie?"
"Back here."
Jaclyn followed her voice to the back corner of the store where she found Maddie standing on top of a pallet looking a little pale. "What"s going on? Why did-Jesus! G.o.d! Why didn"t you call 911?"
"I"m so embarra.s.sed," Maddie said miserably. "I finally got some time alone, and all I wanted to do was work on the manger display before Heath got a hold of it. Last year, he decapitated one of the Wise Men, and he always uses pallets for the floor and it looks c.r.a.ppy." She sounded as though she was going to cry. "We just got in all the Christmas decorations, and Heath ordered way too many manger sets. I was hoping if I made the display nice enough, we could get rid of them."
Jaclyn looked at the base. Maddie had done impressive work. "Honey, how did you nail your sneaker to the manger?"
"Well, that"s the other reason I wanted to do this while Heath was out with the kids. I"m not allowed to use the nail gun because he dismantled some of the safety features. I was going really fast and...well, you see." Maddie looked at Jaclyn when she pressed a key on her phone. "What"re you doing?"
"I"m gonna call the fire department. I can"t get you and the pallet in the car by myself."
"No!" Maddie clenched her fists and closed her eyes. "They"re down here all the time for Heath. It causes a huge commotion, and I"d rather everyone on the lake not know that I nailed myself to a board. I need you to get a saw and cut me loose. You know it"s what they would do."
Jaclyn shook her head. "It"s going to hurt."
"Let"s not have that discussion right now. I"m in enough pain already. There"s a Skil saw in the back that someone returned, go get it. It"s on the shelf to the right just as you walk into the stockroom."