It was not Judy, but the pa.s.sion within her that was speaking through her lips.
"But what good would they have done you? You would have been miserable still."
"At--at least I should have seen him, an"--an" been strengthened in my religion---"
The grotesque, the pitiless horror of it struck him for an instant. That she was half distraught and wholly morbid, he saw from her look, and the sight awakened that indomitable pity which had served always as a medium for the biting irony of life.
"To save my soul I can"t see what satisfaction you would have got out of that," he remarked.
"I did--I did. They helped me to be spiritual minded," wailed Judy with the incoherence of complete despair. If her infatuation was ridiculous, it occurred to Abel that her courage, at least, was sublime. From a distance and with brighter hair, she might even have been mistaken for a tragic example of immortal pa.s.sion. The lover in his blood pitied her, but the Calvinist refused to take her seriously.
"Well, if I were you, I"d go in and lie down," he said feeling that it was, after all, the best advice he could offer her. "You"re sick, that"s what"s the matter with you, and a cup of tea will do you more good than hugging that old mill-stone. I know you can"t help it, Judy," he added in response to a gesture of protestation, "you were born that way, and none of us, I reckon, can help the way we"re born." And since it is easier for a man to change his creed than his inheritance, he spoke in the tone of stern fatalism in which Sarah, glancing about her at life, was accustomed to say to herself, "It"s like that, an" thar wouldn"t be any justice in it except for original sin."
Judy struggled blindly to her feet, and still he did not touch her. In spite of his quiet words there was a taste of bitterness on his lips, as though his magnanimity had turned to wormwood while he was speaking.
After all, he told himself in a swift revulsion of feeling, Judy was his wife and she had made him ridiculous.
"I know it"s hard on you," she said, pausing on the threshold in the vain hope, he could see, that some word would be uttered which would explain things or at least make them bearable. None was spoken, and her foot was on the single step that led to the path, when there came the sound of a horse running wildly up the road through the cornlands, and the next instant the young roan pa.s.sed them, dragging Mr. Mullen"s shattered rig in the direction of the turnpike.
"Let me get there, Judy," said Abel, pushing her out of his way, "something has happened!"
But his words came too late. At sight of the empty gig, she uttered a single despairing shriek, and started at a run down the bank, and over the mill-stream. Midway of the log, she stumbled shrieked again, and fell heavily to the stream below, from which Abel caught her up as if she were a child, and carried her to the opposite side, and across the rocky road to the house. As she lay on Sarah"s bed, with Blossom working over her, she began to scream anew, half unconsciously, in the voice of frenzied terror with which she had cried out at the sound of the running horse. Her face was grey, but around her mouth there was a blue circle that made it look like the sunken mouth of an old woman, and her eyes--in which that stark terror was still visible, as though it had been rendered indelible by the violence of the shock that had called it into being--seemed looking through the figures around her, with the intense yet unseeing gaze with which one might look through shadows in search of an object one does not find.
"Get the doctor at once, Abel," said Blossom, "Grandma says something has happened to bring on Judy"s time. Had you two been quarrelling?"
"Good G.o.d, no. Mr. Mullen"s horse ran away with him and Judy saw it before I could catch her. I don"t know yet whether he is dead or alive."
"I saw him running bareheaded through the cornfield just as you brought Judy in, and I wondered what was the matter. He was going after his horse, I suppose."
"Well, he"s done enough harm for one day. I"m off to Piping Tree for Dr.
Fairley."
But two hours later, when he returned, with the physician on horseback at his side, Mr. Mullen"s driving, like most earnest yet ignorant endeavours, had already resulted in disaster. All night they worked over Judy, who continued to stare through them, as though they were but shadows which prevented her from seeing the object for which she was looking. Then at sunrise, having brought a still-born child into the world, she turned her face to the wall and pa.s.sed out of it in search of the adventure that she had missed.
CHAPTER XIII
WHAT LIFE TEACHES
Judy was laid away amid the low green ridges in the churchyard, where the drowsy hum of the threshing in a wheatfield across the road, was the only reminder of the serious business of life. And immediately, as if the beneficent green had enveloped her memory, her weaknesses were effaced and her virtues were exalted in the minds of the living. Their judgment was softened by a vague feeling of awe, but they were not troubled, while they stood in a solemn and curious row around her grave, by any sense of the pathetic futility of individual suffering in the midst of a universe that creates and destroys in swarms. The mystery aroused no wonder in their thoughts, for the blindness of habit, which pa.s.ses generally for the vision of faith, had paralyzed in youth their groping spiritual impulses.
On the following Sunday, before leaving for fresher fields, Mr. Mullen preached a sermon which established him forever in the hearts of his congregation, and in the course of it, he alluded tenderly to "the exalted Christian woman who has been recently removed from among us to a brighter sphere." It was, on the whole as Mrs. Gay observed afterwards, "his most remarkable effort"; and even Sarah Revercomb, who had heard that her daughter-in-law was to be mentioned in the pulpit, and had attended from the same spiritual pride with which she had read the funeral notice in the Applegate papers, admitted on her way home that she "wished poor Judy could have heard him." In spite of the young woman"s removal to a sphere which Mr. Mullen had described as "brighter," she had become from the instant of her decease, "poor Judy"
in Sarah"s thoughts as well as on her lips.
To Abel her death had brought a shock which was not so much a sense of personal regret, as an intensified expression of the pity he had felt for her while she lived. The huddled figure against the mill-stone had acquired a new significance in the act of dying. A dignity which had never been hers in life, enfolded her when she lay with the accusing and hostile look in her face fading slowly into an expression of peace. With the n.o.ble inconsistency of a generous heart, he began to regard Judy dead with a tenderness he had never been able to feel for Judy living.
The less she demanded of him, the more he was ready to give her.
"I declar" it does look as if Abel was mournin"," remarked Betsey Bottom to Sarah on a September afternoon several months later. "It ain"t suprisin" in his case seein" he jest married her to get even with Molly."
"I don"t believe myself in settin" round an" nursin" grief," responded Sarah, "a proper show of respect is well an" good, but n.o.body can expect a hearty, able bodied man to keep his thoughts turned on the departed.
With women, now, it"s different, for thar"s precious little satisfaction some women get out of thar husbands till they start to wearin" weeds for "em."
"You"ve worn weeds steady now, ain"t you, Mrs. Revercomb?"
Sarah set her mouth tightly. "They were too costly to lay away," she replied, and the words were as real a eulogy of her husband as she had ever uttered.
"It"s a pity Abel lost Molly Merryweather," said Betsey. "Is thar any likelihood of thar comin" together again? Or is it true--as the rumour keeps up--that she is goin" to marry Mr. Jonathan befo" many months?"
"It ain"t likely she"ll throw away all that good money once she"s got used to it," said Sarah. "For my part, I don"t hold with the folks that blamed her for her choice. Thar ain"t many husbands that would be worthy of thar hire, an" how was she to find out, till she tried, if Abel was one of those few or not?"
"He al"ays seemed to me almost too promisin" for his good looks, Mrs.
Revercomb. I"m mighty partial to looks in a man, thar ain"t no use my denyin" it."
"Well, I ain"t," said Sarah, "they"re no mo" than dross an" cobwebs in my sight, but we"re made different an" thar"s no sense arguin" about tastes--though I must say for me that I could never understand how a modest woman like you could confess to takin" pleasure in the sight of a handsome man."
"Well, immodest or not, I hold to it," replied Betsey in as amiable a manner as if there had been no reflection upon her refinement. "Abel stands a good chance for the legislature now, don"t he?"
"I ain"t a friend to that, for I never saw the man yet that came out of politics as clean as he went into "em, and thar ain"t nothin" that takes the place of cleanness with me." In her heart she felt for Betsey something of the contempt which the stoic in all ranks of life feels for the epicurean.
At supper that night Sarah repeated this conversation, and to her astonishment, not Abel, but Blossom, went pitiably white and flinched back sharply as if fearing a second fall of the lash.
"I don"t believe it! Mr. Jonathan will never marry Molly. There"s no truth in it!" she cried.
Over the coffee-pot which she has holding, Sarah stared at her in perplexity. "Why, whatever has come over you, Blossom?" she asked.
"You haven"t been yo"self for a considerable spell, daughter," said Abner, turning to her with a pathetic, anxious expression on his great hairy face. "Do you feel sick or mopin"?"
He looked at Blossom as a man looks at the only thing he loves in life when he sees that thing suffering beneath his eyes and cannot divine the cause. The veins grew large and stood out on his forehead, and the big knotted hand that was carrying his cup to his lips, trembled in the air and then sank slowly back to the table. His usually dull and indifferent gaze became suddenly piercing as if it were charged with electricity.
"It"s nothing, father," said Blossom, pressing her hand to her bosom, as though she were choking for breath, "and it"s all silly talk, I know, about Molly."
"What does it matter to you if it"s true?" demanded Sarah tartly, but Blossom, driven from the room by a spasm of coughing, had already disappeared.
It was a close September night, and as Abel crossed the road to look for a young heifer in the meadow the heavy scent of the Jamestown weeds seemed to float downward beneath the oppressive weight of the atmosphere. The sawing of the katydids came to him out of the surrounding darkness, through which a light, gliding like a gigantic glow-worm along the earth, revealed presently the figure of Jonathan Gay, mounted on horseback and swinging a lantern from his saddle.
"A dark night, Revercomb."
"Yes, there"ll be rain before morning."
"Well, it won"t do any harm. The country needs it. I"m glad to hear, by the way, that you are going into politics. You"re a capital speaker. I heard you last summer at Piping Tree."
He rode on, and Abel forgot the meeting until, on his way back from the meadow, he ran against Blossom, who was coming rather wildly from the direction in which Jonathan had vanished.
"What has upset you so, Blossom? You are like a ghost. Did you meet Mr.
Jonathan?"
"No, why should I meet Mr. Jonathan? What do you mean?"